silent crys for salvation
by miSSmeliSS1324124
Summary: Logan has a new boyfriend but things turn ugly when he finds that his knew man isn't who he thought he was. How will he deal with it and how will Kendall deal with his emotions. rated for later chapters
1. Chapter 1

When Logan woke up he thought that today was going to be like any normal day. He would get up early like he did every Saturday and go down to the pool to get some time to himself. He loved being with his friends and was happy to spend every moment he could with them but if he didn't get a moment to himself so he could just think he would probably go crazy. So here Logan was, sitting by the pool reading not realizing that something was about to happen that would change his life forever.

"Hey." Logan looked away from his book to see an unfamiliar face. He was tall with thick tanned muscles that Logan couldn't help but stair at. When he looked up to the strangers face he had short blonde hair and a smile that at first glance made him look like he was full of himself. When Logan looked at this person in front of him he couldn't help but think of the actor Cam Gigandet (1), the guy looked just like him, but this guy was hotter.

Logan had been out to his friends for a few weeks and they were very supportive, but not everyone at the Palm Woods knew yet so when Logan noticed the stranger was giving Logan a weird look he immediately blushed.

"Hey, how can I help you? The stranger smiled at Logan before sitting in the chair next to him.

"Well I noticed you sitting here by yourself and I thought you might want some company. My names Ryan by the way." Logan laughed causing Ryan to look at him with a raised eyebrow. Once Logan had finally stopped laughing he placed his book down and turned to Ryan.

"Sorry dude it's just that I was just thinking you look like Cam Gigandet and then you tell me your name is Ryan." Ryan's mouth opened and he nodded in understanding.

"Oh, yea the guy from the movie Never Back Down. His name was Ryan in that right?" Logan nodded in confirmation. "Yea I get that a lot but I've never actually seen the movie, is it any good?" Logan thought for a moment before looking back at Ryan.

"Yea it's defiantly good. Good story, good actors, and considering for most of the movie the actors are shirtless I defiantly can't complain." Logan's eyes widened when he realized what he had said. He looked at Ryan who to Logan's surprised wasn't shocked but instead had a huge smirk on his face.

"So, I take it your gay then." Logan swallowed hard before nodding. He really hoped this didn't end badly. Ryan chuckled before sighing dramatically before wiping his forehead. "Thank god cause it would have really sucked to find out I was hitting on a straighty." Logan's mouth opened in shock. Did he just admit that he was hitting on him?

"You're…. H-hitting on me?" Ryan smirked making Logan bit his lip slightly. This guy wasn't just hot he was downright sexy.

"Yea, and now that we've gotten that out of the way, would you like to hang out with me?" Logan blinked for a second, completely absorbing what Ryan had just said to him.

"Sure." Logan smiled as he stood up Ryan following after him. "And I know exactly what we can do." Ryan furrowed his eyebrows but followed Logan.

"By the way, you never told me your name." Logan turned to Ryan with a slight blush.

"Oh sorry, it's Logan."

* * *

After spending the entire day with Ryan, Logan was defiantly beat. He stumbled back into the apartment to find his three friends on the couch watching TV. They looked up once they saw Logan and walked over to him.

"Logan where have you been we looked everywhere for you!" Kendall exclaimed. Logan just walked passed him to the kitchen and grabbed a water bottle before sitting at the table.

"I was hanging out with a friend." James, Kendall, and Carlos furrowed their eyebrows and sat across from Logan.

"First off Logan, if you weren't going to come back today you should have taken your cell phone. And why did you take my DVD with you. You no Never Back Down is my favorite movie and I just got that DVD. And who is this Ryan guy who keeps texting you?" Before James could finish his rant Logan snatched his cell phone away from James and read the text messages.

"Hey Logan it's Ryan. Just wanted to tell you I had fun tonight and thanks for getting that movie. That guy does look like me. Lol." Logan exited out of that message and read the next one.

"Hey Ryan again. I know it's pretty early to be asking you out again but do you want to come back over to my place this Friday?" Logan smiled and replied back to both messages. Ryan was great; he defiantly wanted to go out with him again. Logan looked back at his friends to see that they were eyeing him weirdly.

"What!"

"Did you get yourself a boyfriend?" Logan couldn't help but notice the distaste in Kendall's voice. He was way to over protective sometimes.

"I just met him Kendall, he isn't my boyfriend." James and Carlos glanced at each other, both of them had smirks on their faces.

"But you do like this guy, right?" Carlos teased. Logan slid down in his seat as a blush came to his face. He nodded trying to avoid his friends who were smirking at him. His three friends looked at each other before turning back to Logan.

"We want to meet him." Logan's eyes widened as he sat back up.

"What! Come on I've only been on one date with the guy! Shouldn't I get at least five before you guys try and scare him off!" Carlos, James and Kendall always treated Logan like the baby of the group even though he was the oldest. Logan was scrawny and because of that people always took advantage of him. Logan hadn't had any trouble with bullies lately, mostly because Kendall scarred them all off but when they were back in Minnesota Logan got picked on a lot.

(Flashback)

Logan was walking home after he spent a couple hours in the library finishing his fifth grade science project. He was so excited to get to school the next day and show his teacher who always praised Logan for his talent in academics. For his project he made a model of the Empire State Building and he was going to demonstrate how its design would allow it to withstand earthquakes even though it was so tall. Logan also took the liberty of building other buildings that had over time clasped so he could show how architectural design as grown over the years.(2) Logan smiled as he glanced down at his project one last time. He opened the doors and stepped outside of the school but once he made it to the playground a group of kids stopped him.

"Hey Logan what you got there." Logan narrowed his eyes instantly recognizing the class bully Steven. He swallowed hard and tried to look intimidating but was failing.

"It's my project." Logan went to move passed Steven. "Well, I have to get home now so I'm just gunna go." Steven grabbed Logan by the back of his collar and threw Logan on the ground. He yelped in surprise dropping his project and all his books on the ground as he fell. Logan groaned in pain and looked at his arm which was now scratched up from his wrist to his elbow. Logan got up on his knees to pick up his stuff but was instantly pushed down again by Steven.

"What's wrong loser you gunna cry." Steven's friends laughed and high fived Steven before he turned his attention back on Logan. Logan was trying not to shake or so any emotion. He knew that bullies like Steven fed off of that but when Steven pulled him up by his shirt and punched him in the eye Logan couldn't help but cry out when he landed on the ground again. Logan held his hand to his face in an attempted to lessen the throbbing pain. His lower lip began to quiver and tears threatened to fall as Steven and his friends continued to call him names.

"Look Steven he's crying! What a baby." Steven laughed at Logan's misery and bent down so he was closer to Logan.

"What's wrong you gunna go crying to your mommy. Oh that's right you can't" Logan's eyes widened and the tears that threatened to fall finally came. Logan's mother had died no less than two months ago in a drunk driving accident. His mother had been the drunk driver. "To bad your drunk of a mom couldn't stick around long enough for her to see how much of a loser you are." Steven walked over to Logan's project and stood in front of it. Steven looked at it then looked at Logan with a glare. "I bet you think you're better than everyone else because you're so smart. I bet your mom would probably think you need to be punished for that." Steven lifted his foot and stomped on Logan's project destroying what he had worked months to complete.

"STOP IT!" Logan ran up to stop Steven but his friends pushed him back on the ground. More tears fell as Logan watched Steven continuingly stomp and kick his project. Steven was about to turn back to Logan when he was suddenly on the ground clutching his nose and withering in pain. Logan glanced at Steven wide eyed before he looked away to see Kendall standing over Steven with clenched fists. Carlos and James were soon at Kendall's side and were glaring at Steven as well.

"I thought I told you to leave Logan alone Steve!" Kendall hissed. Steven got back on his feet still holding his nose. He glanced at Kendall then at James and Carlos before running away.

"This isn't over Knight!" Was the last thing Steven said before he was almost out of sight. Kendall continued to glare in Steven and his friend's direction until he heard sniffing behind him. Logan had moved from his spot on the ground and was picking up the left over pieces of his project. Logan threw his project back on the ground finally deciding it couldn't be saved and covered his eyes with his hands. Tears fell down his checks and wrists as he let out small sobs.

Kendall looked at James and Carlos before he walked over to Logan and knelt in front of him. He grabbed Logan's wrist and pulled his hands away from his eyes before smiling at him sweetly.

"It's ok Logan. Steven's gone." Logan looked away from Kendall and down at his project that was by Kendall's feet.

"B-but m-my project….. I-I worked so h-hard on it a-and he r-ruined it. I wanted t-to give i-it to my d-dad so h-he wouldn't be s-sad any m-more." Kendall's smile fell and he pulled Logan into a hug. When he pulled away he held Logan's shoulders and looked at him with determination.

"I'll help you fix it Logan and it will be better than the first time you made it."

"I wanna help too!" Kendall looked back to see Carlos bouncing with a wide grin on his face. Kendall turned to James to see that he was smiling as well.

"I'll help too Logan." Logan blushed at his friends and thanked them. That night they stayed up for hours helping Logan rebuild his project. He was able to hand it in the next day and Kendall, James and Carlos couldn't help but smile because Logan was happy again. The fact that the three of them beat Steven up later helped as well.

(End Flashback)

Logan sighed when he thought back to that day. His friends became like his body guards after that. A lot of times Logan thought it was sweet but times like now, he thought it was annoying.

"We won't scare him off Logan. We just want to meet him." James said reassuringly. Kendall scoffed at James.

"Speak for yourself." Logan groaned before leaning against the back of the chair

"Kendall!" James and Carlos laughed at Logan who was staring at Kendall with a pout on his face. Logan hated that they considered him the unofficial baby of the group but watching him at times like these it was believable. Whenever any of them, especially Kendall, tried to stop Logan from doing something he wanted to do Logan would usually whine their name and follow that up with a pout. It happened every time and every time Kendall fell prey to it. Kendall rolled his eyes and sighed at Logan.

"Fine, I won't scare him away but I still want to meet him." Logan smiled before getting up and walking to his room. Before he was out of hearing distance he yelled to his friends.

"You can meet him before my date with him on Friday!"

* * *

It was finally Friday and Logan was excited. The last time he had seen Ryan was Monday when they watched that movie together but they had been texting each other none stop. Logan thought that after tonight's date they could begin dating exclusively and Logan was nervous to ask Ryan that. That of course wasn't all Logan was nervous about. He was sitting in the Kitchen watching his friends as they glared at the door. He rolled his eyes before taking a sip of his water. Every so often one of them would glance at the clock causing their eyes to narrow even more. Logan could just imagine what they were thinking

"Just try showing up late dirt bag." When Logan heard a knock at the door he ran in front of the door and put his arms out, stopping his friends who were running at him.

"Go. Sit. Down!" He whisper yelled at them. Logan waited until his friends were seated on the couch before taking in a breath and opening the door. He smiled when he saw Ryan standing there with a bouquet of flowers, a teddy bear, and a box of cookies. Logan raised an eyebrow at Ryan who laughed.

"The flowers are for Mrs. Knight and the teddy bear is for Katie. Logan had told Ryan about His friends and Kendall's family in their texts so Ryan knew a lot about them. Logan nodded before stepping out of the way so Ryan could get in. He took the flowers and teddy bear and placed them on the counter before pointing to the cookies.

"Who are those for?" Ryan smiled before handing Logan the cookies.

"Those are for your friends. I figured if I gave them something to eat they wouldn't eat me." Logan laughed and led Ryan over to the couch. He placed the cookies in front of his friends who eyed them for a moment before looking back at Ryan. "Ryan, this is Kendall, James and, Carlos. Guys, this is Ryan." Ryan waved at them as they nodded their heads in acknowledgement. It was silent for a moment and Logan was getting worried until James spoke.

"You really do look like Cam Gigandet." Logan sighed; James and Ryan were hitting it off but what about the others. Logan glanced over to Carlos to see that he had already opened the box of cookies and was happily eating them. Logan sighed again but then his breath caught in his throat when he spotted Kendall. Kendall was still glaring at Ryan. His jaw was clenched and his lips were set in a line. If Logan didn't get Ryan out of here soon he knew it wouldn't end well. He quickly grabbed him by the arm and dragged him out of the apartment waving goodbye to his friends.

When they got to Ryan's apartment they ate dinner that Ryan and made before moving over to the couch and talking. It was mostly about nothing important but they seemed to talk for hours until the subject of future dates arrived. Logan swallowed hard as he prepared himself for what he was about to say.

"Uh Ryan, I know this is only our second date but I really like you and I was um… I was hoping you would want to start dating more exclusively." Logan didn't look at Ryan out of fear of rejection but when Ryan grabbed his chin so they were facing each other Logan didn't see anger or disgust.

"Yea, I would like that Logan." Logan smiled at Ryan. Ryan leaned towards Logan and captured his lips in a soft kiss before placing his hands on Logan's shoulders deepening the kiss. Logan kissed back as Ryan's mouth moved against his. When Logan broke away for air Ryan moved to Logan's neck and began kissing and sucking his skin. Logan glanced at the clock and noticed it was already time for him to leave. He pushed lightly on Ryan's chest but Ryan merely pulled Logan closer.

"R-Ryan, I really have to go." Logan laughed as Ryan continued to kiss and nip at his neck. Logan pushed on Ryan's chest again but he still didn't let go. "Ryan I need to go. Can you stop that you're biting to hard." Ryan held Logan's hips as he began to bite down harder on Logan's neck. "Ryan stop, you're hurting me. RYAN!" Ryan pulled away suddenly and placed his hand on the hickey that was already forming on Logan's neck.

"I'm sorry Logan. I guess I just got carried away. I hope I didn't hurt you. I'm not really used to someone with such a soft neck." Logan sighed before placing a small peck on Ryan's lips.

"It's ok." Logan said a finally good bye before walking back to his apartment. When he got there he found his friends asleep on the couch. Logan sighed and shook his head before heading into the bathroom. He stood in front of the sink and looked at his neck in the mirror. The mark Ryan made was already darkening. Logan knew he would never hear the end of it if his friends saw it so he grabbed James cover up and applied it to the hickey. It was only one bruise so Logan wasn't worried about it.

**A/N: This didn't turn out as I would hope but it's still pretty good. That is the end of the first chapter. I hoped you enjoyed and there is more to come. =]**

**(1): Cam Gigandet played the antagonist in Never Back Down and also played James in twilight. When I was trying to picture Ryan I just automatically thought of Cam Gigandet because he played an ass whole so it worked. Lol**

**(2): I don't know if that sounds like a smart complicated project but considering its when Logan was in 5****th**** grade I think it works. **


	2. Finally the monster comes out

Logan and Ryan had been dating for Three weeks now and Kendal couldn't stand it. He wasn't sure what made him hate Ryan so much and every time Logan confronted him about it he always told him he was just being his overprotective self. Kendall wasn't so sure that was the case and it worried him. Whenever he saw Logan and Ryan together something in him just made him fill with rage and he didn't know how to react to it but there was something else to. Something about Ryan didn't sit well with Kendall and that always made him worry for Logan. Kendall could tell that Logan was hiding something but he wasn't sure what.

Logan sighed as he examined himself in the mirror. His upper arms and waist had dark bruises and it was starting to worry Logan. Whenever Ryan and Logan were around people he would be soft and gently but the moment they were alone he would be gripping Logan to the point that Logan would have to stop Ryan from doing anymore. Logan really liked Ryan but the fact was that when they were alone he couldn't help but feel a little fear. Ryan was rough with Logan and whenever he would get to rough he would just say that Logan was too sensitive and need to loosen up but Logan wasn't sure if that was the case. Logan sighed again before pulling on his shirt and walking into the living room.

"Hey Kendall." Logan waved and sat next to Kendall who was watching TV. Kendall smiled at Logan and Logan couldn't help the calm feeling that Kendall always brought over him. "So, what are you doing today?" Kendall sighed sadly causing Logan to sit up and look at him worriedly.

"I'm having "the talk" with Jo today." Logan furrowed his eyebrows at Kendall who turned the TV off and looked toward Logan. "I just don't feel anything besides friendship toward her anymore." Logan nodded in understanding and placed a comforting hand on Kendall's shoulder. Kendall unconsciously leaned into the touch. He always loved the warmth that radiated from Logan. It was different than anything he had ever felt.

"Does she suspect anything yet?" Kendall sighed and leaned his head back, sliding down the couch.

"Probably not." Logan set his lip in a line and patted Kendall's shoulder.

"Good luck buddy." Kendall rolled his eyes and glared at Logan sensing his teasing tone.

"Yea thanks," Kendall said sarcastically as Logan walked out the door. Kendall couldn't help but feel frustrated as he watched Logan leave and it wasn't because the talk he had to have with Jo. Kendall closed his eyes for a second trying to get his thoughts together when he was suddenly on the floor with a body sitting on top of him. He groaned in pain and looked up to see Carlos sitting on him with a goofy grin on his face. "Carlos, what the hell." Kendall glared at Carlos who got up and reached his hand out to help Kendall up.

"You looked so out of it so I thought I should knock some sense into you." Kendall narrowed his eyes at Carlos as he smacked the side of his head. If it wasn't for his helmet, it probably would have hurt. "What's up with you anyway, and don't tell me it's Jo cause I know that's not the only thing that's bothering you." Kendall sighed, when it came to smarts Carlos wasn't on the top but when it came to reading his friend's emotions he was good. Kendall sat back down on the couch and ran his hands through his hair.

"Carlos, what do you think of Ryan?" Carlos rolled his eyes at Kendall. James and Carlos had gotten used to Ryan and they actually thought he was pretty cool but for some reason Kendall wouldn't jump on the bandwagon.

"I think he's a cool dude. He's nice and he spends time with Logan but always makes sure Logan spends time with us. What do you have against the guy?" Carlos was staring at Kendall with arms crossed and raised eyebrows. Kendall knew that Carlos was going to fight any bad thing he said about Ryan so he just went with something simple.

"I don't know, there's just… something not right. I can't explain it but it worries me." Carlos dropped his arms and furrowed his eyebrows in concern. Carlos hadn't expected Kendall to say that. He sounded sad and extremely worried and it was out of character for Kendall. Carlos sighed and placed a hand on Kendall's shoulder.

"You don't need to worry about Logan. You and I both know if something wasn't right he would tell us." Kendall nodded and smiled at Carlos. He was right; Logan never kept anything from them so if something was wrong they would know about it.

* * *

Logan smiled when he saw Ryan in the lobby waiting for him. They had planned on just relaxing by the pool and to Logan's surprise there wasn't a lot of people around.

"Hey," Logan leaned up and pecked Ryan on the lips, "Where is everyone. The pool is usually packed with people." Ryan looked around and smiled slyly, even Mr. Bitters wasn't around.

"There's some field day at Palm Woods Park so everyone's over there." Logan nodded in understanding and turned to walk over to the pool only to be pulled back roughly by Ryan.

"Ow, what are you doing?" Logan was starting to get nervous. Ryan held Logan's hips and pulled him close so their faces were inches apart.

"Since we're alone, I thought we could have some fun." Ryan brought their lips together in a teeth clashing kiss. He sucked on Logan's lower lip and forced his lips apart. Logan grasped onto Ryan's arms trying to keep up with the pace he was going at but was finding it hard. Ryan ran his tongue through Logan's mouth and started moving him backward until Logan was trapped between Ryan and the wall. He moved his hands around Logan's stomach and waist squeezing and rubbing Logan's skin. Logan tried pulling away from the kiss but flinched when Ryan nipped on his bottom lip. Ryan was moving his hands to the hem of Logan's shirt and Logan tried to swat his hands away but Ryan just grabbed his wrists and held them over his head. Logan turned his head in a desperate attempt to get air but Ryan simply moved to his neck and jaw, biting down hard.

"Ryan stop. You're hurting me." Logan tried to move his hands but Ryan forced them back against the wall. "Ryan, I think we're moving too fast I'm not ready for this yet." Logan could feel Ryan's arousal rubbing against his thigh and immediately knew what Ryan wanted to do. "Ryan stop!" Ryan pulled back reluctantly and looked at Logan with dark eyes. Logan wasn't sure what was going through Ryan's mind but he couldn't help the fear that Ryan's stare brought on.

"What's wrong Logan?" Logan swallowed hard trying to ignore Ryan's clearly annoyed tone. He didn't want things to be moving this fast but he was afraid that Ryan would stop liking him if it didn't move fast enough.

"I'm not ready to do this yet. Kissing and making out is fine but that's it." Logan shook his arms out of Ryan's grip and stepped away from the wall so he wasn't pinned anymore. "And you can't be so rough with me Ryan, you're hurting me." Logan lifted up his wrists that were already starting to bruise from the grip Ryan had on them. Ryan stepped forward and pulled Logan into a soft kiss.

"I'm sorry Logan; I don't mean to hurt you. But are you sure you don't want to do a little more." Ryan ran his hands down Logan's stomach but Logan pushed him away before he could get any further.

"I said no Ryan!" Ryan grabbed Logan and shoved him into the wall. Logan shook and his heart rate sped up so fast he thought it would explode out of his chest. Ryan was forcing all of his body weight onto Logan and was staring at him with dark rage filled eyes.

"Don't. Ever push me again. Got it." Logan shut his eyes and looked away from Ryan. He whimpered as Ryan tightened his grip on his arms. "I said. Got it." Logan nodded his head slowly and shuttered as he felt Ryan kiss the side of his face. Ryan pulled away from Logan and watched him for a second. He replaced his angry grimace with a smile and gently cupped Logan's face. "I'll see you later ok babe." Logan nodded as he remained pressed against the wall. Once he felt Ryan's presence disappear Logan slide down the wall and wrapped his arms around his legs. He stayed there for a long time, shaking and crying trying to come to terms with just happened. Every "accident" that Ryan caused was starting to add up. At first it didn't seem like something Logan needed to worry about but now Logan wasn't so sure anymore. As Logan stood up and made his way into the elevator he knew what he had to do. He had to end it with Ryan before anything got any worse but he had to be careful.

"Where can I do it were there will be a lot of people." Logan knew that it wasn't going to end well if he did it when they were alone so he knew he was safe if they were in public. Ryan never acted up when they were in public. Logan walked into the apartment to find Carlos sitting on the couch. Carlos glanced uninterestingly then looked at Logan again. Carlos walked over to Logan and grabbed his chin turning his head side to side.

"Logan! Where did you get all these marks? Are these hickeys!" Normally Carlos would be teasing Logan for having hickeys but these were so dark they looked painful. Logan removed Carlos' hand from his chin and made his way to the bathroom.

"Its fine Carlos don't worry about it." Carlos continued to stare in the direction of the bathroom with concern but choose not to press Logan on the matter; he was probably just over reacting. Once Logan finished applying more cover up he climbed into bed deciding it was best to just go to sleep. He wasn't sure how he was going to face his friends in the morning and he wasn't sure how he was going to face Ryan either. Logan sighed as tears started to fall from his eyes. He wanted his friends help so bad but he didn't want to bother them with his problems.

**A/N: that's the end of this chapter. hope you enjoyed this and there is more to come. **


	3. It was too easy

**A/N: Here is chapter 3! Now I'm going to be busy this week so I might not update as quickly as usually. I probably will be able to do chapter 4 in the usual time span that I get these chapters up but after that it probably won't be as often. Anyway enjoy!**

When Logan woke up that morning he groaned silently feeling the pain that Ryan had caused the previous day. His arms, waist and, back ached. Not to mention his head was throbbing, he must have hit his head when he hit the wall and not realized it. Logan got up after a moment and walked into the bathroom. He stripped his cloths and stepped into the shower as soon as it was at the desired temperature. Logan sighed as the warm water washed over his body bringing relief to his aches and pains. When Logan was done he dried himself off and got dressed. Normally Logan wouldn't wear long sleeves but with his wrists bruised badly he didn't really have a choice. Before Logan left the bathroom he applied more cover up to his hickeys and bruises and put the cover up back in James' bathroom. He had to remember to buy more of that for James before he got to suspicious. Logan had planned on going straight to the kitchen but stopped short when he heard a thump and a yelp from his and Kendall's room. He walked inside and couldn't help but crack a smile when he found Kendall sprawled out on the floor.

"Hey Kendall, rough morning?" Kendall stopped trying to untangle his legs from his blanket and narrowed his eyes at Logan.

"Ha ha, very funny." Kendall finally untangled himself and stood up. He stretched his muscles and Logan couldn't help but stare as Kendall's muscles flexed and stretched. Logan tore his eyes away not wanting to risk him noticing.

"I'm going to start making breakfast." Logan walked out before Kendall could reply. That was the first time Logan every felt that way when he looked at Kendall. When he watched him he just wanted to reach out and run his hand over his soft skin, caressing every muscle. Logan shook the thought from his head, he already had enough anxiety because of Ryan he didn't need to add being attracted to his best friend to that. Logan swallowed when he let that thought pass through his mind. He was attracted to Kendall. He didn't think of Kendall like he had thought of Ryan. Kendall was special, his smile, his laugh, his everything. Maybe it was more than just attraction, maybe he was in love with Kendall.

"Shit." Logan poured the pancake batter that he had just finished mixing in the pan and added bananas. Once the first batch was done he made another batch and mixed in chocolate chips (for Carlos). When he was just about finished James, Kendall and Carlos walked into the kitchen and sat at the table.

"YES! You made pancakes!" Carlos pounced as soon as Logan put the plate down. If Logan hadn't pulled his hand back in time Carlos probably would have chewed it off. Logan got each of his friends a drink before sitting down and grabbing himself three banana pancakes. "Tnks ffff tph pnckes Logih." Logan stared at Carlos weirdly while Carlos continued to stuff his face.

"I'm going to assume you were thanking me for the pancakes so…. Your welcome." They ate in silence for a few moments before James turned to Logan with a smile.

"So Logan are you going to hang out with Ryan today." Logan swallowed but couldn't get rid of the lump in his throat. He glanced at Carlos who was looking at Logan with concern. He hoped that Kendall and James hadn't noticed, but they did. "Is everything ok Logan? Is something going on with you and Ryan?" Logan couldn't get his friends involved in this; he couldn't inconvenience his friends with his problems. Logan took in a breath and put on the best mask he could.

"Everything's fine, Carlos just can't tell the difference between a bruise and a hickey." Logan blushed, normally he wouldn't dream about telling his friends that he had a hickey but it was the only way to trick his friends into thinking everything was fine. James laughed and patted Logan's hair.

"Aw our little Logie is growing up." Logan punched James' arm. It seemed that his plan worked but when he glanced at Kendall he saw something in his eyes that said that he was still suspicious. Logan sighed, so his plan didn't completely work but at least it didn't seem that Kendall was going to jump into action so he still had some time. Once everyone was done eating Logan collected the plates and washed them. He put them away and said goodbye to his friends before leaving. Logan thought he had relieved the worry in Carlos but Logan wasn't the only one capable of throwing a mask up. Once Carlos heard the door shot he turned to his friends who were already starting to stand up.

"Guys." James and Kendall looked at Carlos concerned when they heard the fear in Carlos' voice. James sat back down next to Carlos and placed a hand on his shoulder. He knew just by looking into his eyes that he was worried about Logan.

"Carlos what's wrong." Carlos sighed and glanced up at Kendall who was still standing.

"When you told me early that you didn't like Ryan because something about him didn't sit right with you, what was it that you didn't like exactly?" Kendall sighed and looked toward a picture of his mom, his sister, and himself on the wall. He knew exactly what it was that bothered him but he wasn't sure how to explain it to his friends.

"He seems two faced to me. Like the whole nice act is just that, an act. His smile seems genuine but he has the same eyes as my dad." James glanced at Carlos who was looking at Kendall confused. They knew that Kendall's dad was a bad guy. The simple term to describe him was "wife beater" and he had been put in jail a long time ago.

"Kendall, what do you mean?" James didn't like where this was going. If Kendall was comparing Ryan to his asshole of a father it wasn't a good thing.

"When my dad was around other people he would smile and be all sweet but I could always see the anger in his eyes. Kendall swallowed the lump in his throat. "His eyes were always so cold. Only someone who knew the real him would notice that." When Kendall looked back at his friends James was looking at his lap and to Kendall's shock Carlos was crying. Kendall bent down next to Carlos causing James to look up and take notice to his crying friend as well. "Carlos why are you crying?" Carlos wiped his nose with his sleeve and stared at his lap.

"When I saw Logan last night his neck was covered with marks. They didn't look like normal hickeys, they looked like they hurt and Logan seemed off. He looked so scared, but I didn't know what it was." Carlos looked at Kendall as more tears fell from his eyes. "What if Ryan is hurting him." Before this moment Kendall kept trying to convince himself that nothing was wrong and from the looks on Carlos and James' faces, they had been trying to do the same. Kendall couldn't help but laugh to himself; it looks like Ryan wasn't the only one being two faced. Kendall could tell in this moment that James and Carlos never liked Ryan; they were pretending to make Logan happy. Kendall stood up, James and Carlos following.

"We have to find Logan and get to the bottom of this. If something is wrong we need to be there for him but let's just hope we're being paranoid." Carlos wiped the rest of his tears away and put his helmet on his head patting it twice and James nodded at Kendall with determination in his eyes. They all left the apartment and split up deciding they would find their friend faster. They needed to get to Logan before Ryan did.

* * *

Logan was hoping to get his confrontation with Ryan over with as soon as possible. He had texted him telling him to meet at Palm Woods park near where Mr. Bitters car was he still owned it. Logan had taken extra precautions when it came to picking the location for the break up. He checked the message board in the lobby and saw that there was an intramural soccer game in the park. They're would be tons of people there. Once Logan got outside he spotted Ryan leaning against a tree watching one of the many soccer games that were going on. To Logan's relief the park was crawling with people. If something went wrong all he would have to do is scream. Logan took in a deep breath as he slowly approached Ryan, he was going to keep his distance but still stay close enough so no one could hear their conversation. Logan figured 5 or 6 feet was enough, He would be out of Ryan's reach and if Ryan decided to lung at him someone would defiantly notice. When Ryan finally noticed Logan he walked over to him and tried to kiss Logan's lips but Logan turned away. Logan stepped back the 6 feet and sighed.

"Logan what's wrong." Logan shook his head at Ryan and looked him straight in the eyes.

"Ryan since the moment we started dating you have been cruel to me and I'm not going to take it anymore. You've been pressuring me hitting me and to be honest I'm afraid of you. When I tell you to stop you should stop. I shouldn't have to yell and scream at you to get you to listen." Ryan stepped forward causing Logan to step back.

"But Logan-" Logan held his hand up to stop Ryan.

"I don't want to hear it. I'm not going to let this escalate any further, we're done." Logan watched Ryan carefully. His face remained expressionless but Logan could see the rage in his eyes. If they had been alone Logan knew he would probably be half dead by now. Ryan sighed and started walking back towards the lobby. Logan made sure to take one step away from Ryan every time he made one step forward. After a few carefully placed steps Ryan was walking into the Palm Woods while Logan watched him, standing were Ryan had previously stood. Once Logan was sure Ryan was out of site Logan made his way back to apartment 2J. He decided while he was on his way there that he was going to tell his friends everything. His relationship with Ryan was over so he didn't have to worry about his friends trying to end it for him. Although there still was the possibility that Kendall would want to find Ryan and kick his sorry ass but Logan wasn't too worried about that, in fact a small part of him was thinking about letting Kendall do it. Logan laughed as he climbed the last set of stairs to his floor but when he went to go through the door he was pulled back and pushed into the wall.

"What's so funny?" Ryan hissed out. "You laughing at me nerdy boy, huh. You must think you're so smart." Ryan pressed harder on Logan's shoulders pushing him closer to the wall. "You must think you're so much better than me. But guess what, you're not and you don't get a say. I'm tired of tip toeing around you and now we're gunna do things my way."Logan tried to push Ryan away from him but it wasn't doing him any good. He squirmed and thrashed under Ryan's hold but his grip was to strong.

"LET GO OF ME!" Ryan covered Logan's mouth and pulled him out onto the second floor. He gripped Logan's hair and pulled him down the hall until they got to Ryan's apartment. Logan could only watch as they passed apartment 2J. Logan wanted to scream; hoping that one of his friends would run out and save him but Ryan was gripping his face so hard he could feel Ryan's nails digging into his skin. Once Ryan got his door open he shut it and locked it. He pulled Logan further into the apartment and entered one of the bedrooms. Once inside he threw Logan onto the floor. Logan got on his hands and knees trying desperately to crawl away from Ryan but he reached down and pulled Logan back by his ankle. Ryan pulled Logan up by his collar and punched him in the eye knocking him back down to the ground. Logan sat up and clutched his hand to his face trying to suppress the throbbing pain. He inched backward until he was pressed against the far wall crying as Ryan started moving over to him. His body shook and his lip quivered as Ryan's body slowly began to block out the light coming from the door.

"I'm tired of waiting Logan, so I'm going to take what I want." Logan couldn't help but think back to that time in 5th grade when Steven beat him up. He was in the same position as that time, on the ground clutching his face, shaking and lip quivering as the cause of his misery stood before him. But this situation was different because of two reaons. Firstly Kendall, James and, Carlos weren't here to save him this time and secondly, he was going to lose a lot more than a science fair project.

**A/N: There you have it. That is the end of chapter 3! I had actually planned on putting the rape seen in this chapter but then I figured it would be more fun to end this on a cliff hanger. But then again it's not really suspenseful because you all know Logan's going to get raped so it's not very cliff hanger…y. well anyway! I hope you enjoyed this chapter and there is more to come!**


	4. To late

**A/N: Alright people, this is the rape chapter. You have been warned!**

James had been running around the pool for a good hour trying to find Logan. When James, Kendall and Carlos left the apartment, they each took a different portion of the Palm Woods to search. James was searching the pool but after taking one more look around he plopped down on a chair and buried his face in his hands. He looked up and watched a couple people walk by him. Logan wasn't here and from what people he asked had told him, he didn't even come to the pool today. James let out a sigh and stood up again. He took out his phone deciding that he should text Kendall and Carlos telling them to meet by Bitters' desk when they were done. While James waited for his friends to text him back he decided to ask a couple more people if they had seen Logan. He just preyed that he was ok.

* * *

In a last effort to get away Logan stood up and jumped onto Ryan's bed then onto the floor again. He was almost out the door when he felt to arms wrap around his waist pulling him back. Logan grasped onto the door frame but it didn't do him any good.

"NO! STOP PLEASE!" Ryan ripped Logan's hands from the door and slammed him into the wall. Logan elbowed Ryan in the ribs causing him to stumble back a little but before Logan could get away Ryan grabbed his shirt and threw him to the floor. Before Logan had time to think Ryan placed a hard kick to Logan's back. Logan cried out and rolled away but that only allowed Ryan to now kick his stomach and chest. Ryan went to kick Logan again but Logan grabbed his leg and held on to him.

"LET GO OF ME YOU LITTLE SHIT!" After Ryan determined that he couldn't shake Logan off his leg he reached down and grabbed Logan by his hair. Logan screamed as he was roughly tugged off the ground. He held Ryan's wrist trying to lessen the pain in his head but it didn't help. Ryan used his free hand and punched Logan in the gut making Logan cry out again. After Ryan punched him once more in the gut he let go of Logan's hair and delivered one hard punch to Logan's face making him fall back. Logan clutched at his stomach sobbing over the pain. He could feel the blood that came from his nose and split lip falling down his face. Ryan bent down next to Logan and grabbed his wrists pinning them above Logan's head. Logan tried pulling away but once again his attempts proved futile.

"RYAN STOP PLEASE! NO MORE! NO!" Logan continued to cry as Ryan straddled his hips and began viciously biting his neck.

* * *

Carlos collapsed on a chair in the game room after he had spent the last hour searching the Lobby and all the other rooms for Logan. Carlos couldn't find him anywhere and according to anyone he talked to they hadn't seen Logan. Carlos pulled out his phone to see if he had any messages and noticed he had one from James. Carlos hoped it meant he found Logan but James only told him to meet once he was done looking. Carlos sighed and began to make his way back to the lobby, hopefully his friends had better luck then he did.

* * *

"RYAN PLEASE! STOP IT!" Ryan was on top of Logan kissing and sucking on his skin. Ryan sunk his teeth into Logan's jaw causing Logan to squirm. He released his death grip on Logan's wrists and moved his hands over Logan's chest and stomach finally resting on Logan's pants. Logan's eyes widened and he gasped when he felt Ryan roughly undo the button and zipper. Logan kicked his legs causing Ryan to fall off of him. He started moving to the door but Ryan grabbed his ankle again and pulled him back. Logan kicked his legs in an attempt to keep Ryan away from him but Ryan managed to flip Logan onto his stomach. Ryan sat on Logan's legs to stop him from kicking and held both of Logan's hands tightly against Logan's back. Logan continued to cry as he felt Ryan pull his pants and boxers off. He moved between Logan's legs and forced them apart as he pulled down his own pants releasing his erection.

"NO! STOP! PLEASE!" Ryan grabbed Logan's hips and in one motion, thrust harshly into Logan.

"AH! STOP PLEASE! SOMEBODY HELP ME!"

* * *

Kendall took another look around the park and was absolutely sure Logan wasn't around. He had only looked for about 40 minutes but it was a small park so he didn't have to look far. Kendall was about to leave the park when he spotted Jo sitting under a tree. He hadn't talked to her since they broke up but there was a chance she had seen Logan so he ran over to her. When Jo spotted Kendall coming over she grimaced slightly, clearly she was still mad at Kendall.

"What do you want?" Jo said uninterestingly. Kendall ignored Jo's tone and took in a breath.

"Have you seen Logan? It's really important, I have to find him." Jo furrowed her eyebrows in concern.

"Is everything ok?" Kendall sighed.

"I don't have time to explain. Did you see him?" Jo nodded her head causing Kendall to light up. Someone had finally seen Logan.

"He was here like an hour ago with Ryan. I think they broke up. Kendall swallowed the lump in his throat. If Ryan hurt Logan Kendall was going to rip off his head.

"Did they leave together?" Jo shook her head making Kendall feel a little better.

"Ryan left first then Logan left a few minutes later." Kendall ran back to the lobby with a quick thank you to Jo. Maybe Logan had gone back to the apartment. When Kendall, James, and Carlos had gone to look for him they took the elevator so Logan probably took the stairs. Once Kendall was at the apartment he burst in and ran to look in every room.

"Logan!" After Kendall took a quick look around he ran his hand through his hair and sighed. Logan wasn't here.

* * *

Logan screamed again as Ryan roughly thrust into him. The pain was so excruciating that Logan thought he would pass out. Ryan kept thrusting into Logan and Logan could feel him starting to pick up the pace.

"STOP PLEASE! NO MORE!" Ryan ignored Logan's pleas and began thrusting rapidly. Logan would have thought that all his screaming and crying would make Ryan angry and hit him more but it actually seemed to turn him on even more. Logan shut his eyes tightly and clawed at the floor in a futile attempt to get away from Ryan. Ryan's thrusts were becoming erratic and he was thrusting into Logan harder, trying to get deeper. Logan felt even more pain than before and screamed out.

"SOMEONE PLEASE! KENDALL!"

* * *

Kendall stopped walking and looked around for a moment. He swore he had heard someone called his name but he didn't know where it came from. Kendall looked around the empty hallway for a moment just listening. It was eerily quiet and Kendall was starting to get freaked out. Kendall jumped when he felt his phone vibrate, he pulled it out to see he had a text from James. Kendall took another look down the hallway before running down the stairs to meet with Carlos and James.

* * *

Ryan thrust a few more times before finally releasing his load inside of Logan. He pulled out causing Logan to whimper and stood up.

"I'm going to go to the bathroom and clean up. Don't fucking move." Logan nodded his head still keeping his eyes closed. As soon as he heard Ryan leave Logan curled in on himself and began to sob. He was shaking so bad that it took him a good five minutes to pull his pants back up and close them. Logan stood up on shaking legs and made his way over to the bedroom door. His body hurt so badly but he had to get out of here. To Logan's relief he didn't have to walk pasted the bathroom to get to the front door so as quickly and quietly as he could he made his way over. Logan was able to get the door unlocked when he heard Ryan's voice from the other room.

"LOGAN YOU LITTLE SHIT!" Logan flung the door open and ran as fast as he could hearing Ryan's footsteps behind him. He had to get out of there.

**A/N: RUN LOGAN RUN! Anyway, that's the end of this chapter. I should actually say I hope you didn't enjoy it because no one should enjoy poor Logan getting raped. I'm sorry Logan don't worry you'll find love soon enough! =]**

**Anyway there is more to come!**


	5. what does he mean to you

As Logan ran down the hallway he just wanted to give in. His body hurt so much from Ryan's abuse and the running didn't help his aching backside. Logan spared a glance behind him, eyes widening when he realized Ryan was right behind him. Logan gritted his teeth trying to ignore the pain as he picked up the pace. When he reached the entrance to the stairs he didn't have time to come to a complete stop and ran into the door. He pulled it open and immediately started run down the stairs two at a time.

"If I can just get to the lobby, I'll be safe." Logan thought as he ran to the last flight of stairs. Logan was almost in the clear when he felt someone grasp the color of his shirt and pull him back, hard. Logan landed on the top of the last flight of stairs. Logan rolled onto his back clutching his elbow as more tears spilled from his eyes. Who ever thought of the name "funny bone" was an idiot because slamming it full force into a concert staircase defiantly isn't funny. Logan opened his eyes to see Ryan standing over him nostrils flaring and fists clenched. Logan whimpered and started to shake again as he watched the monster standing before him. Ryan reached out and grabbed onto the front of Logan's shirt, lifting him up so he was standing again.

"I thought I fucking told you to stay!" Logan closed his eyes hoping Ryan wouldn't hit him again but to his horror he found himself tumbling down the stairs after Ryan threw him down. Logan rolled a couple times until he finally landed on the flat surface at the bottom of the stairs and slid until he hit the back wall. Logan sat up cringing as pain shot through his body. His arms were cut up badly from the fall and blood seeped out of a cut on his forehead. Logan slowly got to his feet and leaned against the wall as he watched Ryan slowly making his way down the stairs. Logan swallowed hard, he was done for. He closed his eyes once again not wanting to see the coming pain but then he suddenly heard a familiar voice.

* * *

Kendall stood in the lobby waiting for Carlos and James to meet with him. He paced the floor a couple times losing patience with his two friends who seemed to be taking their sweet time getting here. Kendall sighed when he finally spotted James and Carlos walking over to him.

"Did you guys find anything?" Kendall asked as panic slowly rose in him. Both James and Carlos shook their heads slowly; they were starting to panic as well. Kendall ran a hand threw his hair as he looked around the lobby. "Logan was defiantly in the park today, Jo saw him and from what she heard Logan broke up with Ryan." James and Carlos stared at Kendall with expressions of both shock and worry.

"What happened after that?" Carlos asked franticly.

"Jo says Ryan left the park and Logan stayed a little longer but then left as well." James sighed filling with hope.

"That's good right? That means that Logan wasn't actually with him so maybe he just left the Palm Woods for a little while. Logan's probably fi-" James stopped talking and closed his jaw tightly. Kendall and Carlos looked at him in Confusion but turned around to see what James was looking in horror at.

* * *

Logan could recognize that voice, or rather, those voices anywhere. Kendall, James and Carlos were in the lobby. His saving grace was just behind that door. Logan knew he had to get to Kendall, Kendall would protect him. Logan glanced back toward Ryan to see he was halfway down the stairs. Logan took a deep breath preparing for the pain his sudden burst of energy would cause him and ran at the door for the lobby. Ryan tried to stop Logan by grabbing him but Logan was able to get out of Ryan's grip by stepping on his foot. Logan stumbled out into the lobby hearing gasps from the people who stopped to stare at Logan wide eyed. Logan wasn't surprised though, he knew he was beat up badly so their horror filled expressions were understandable. Logan looked up to see that James was staring at him wide eyed and Kendall and Carlos were just turning around. Logan didn't give Kendall the time to figure out what James was staring at because he ran the 10 or so feet that separated himself from Kendall and threw himself at Kendall wrapping his arms around his torso and burying his face in his shirt.

Kendall stared wide eyed at Logan who had just run into Kendall's arms. Logan's face was buried in Kendall's shirt and his arms were wrapped tightly around his torso. Kendall could hear Logan's muffled sobs and he could feel how much his body was shaking. Kendall wrapped one hand around Logan's back and slowly ran the other hand threw Logan's hair but when Kendall felt something wet and sticky cover his hand he pulled his hand away from Logan's head. Kendall stared wide eyed at the blood covering his fingers. He looked at Carlos and James who were staring at Kendall's hand as well but after a moment all three of their attentions turned to the son of a bitch who was still standing by the door to the stairs. Ryan hadn't moved when he realized he had been caught. He just couldn't get his feet to move as everyone's eyes bore into him.

Kendall's jaw clenched and his fists were so tightly closed his knuckles were white. Without saying a word he gently removed Logan's hands from around his torso and handed Logan over to James. James wrapped his arms around Logan before he could get too upset over the lack of protective arms around him. James rubbed Logan's arm as he watched Kendall carefully. The only time James has ever seen Kendall look at someone with that much hatred and rage was when they had done something to hurt his friends or family. But James could narrow it down even more to say that Kendall only had that look when it came to people who hurt Logan. James glanced at Carlos who was staring at Ryan with ragged filled eyes as well but not nearly with the intensity as Kendall's.

"That bitch is dead." Kendall hissed out before making his way over to Ryan with Carlos right behind him. Before Ryan could even think he had been grabbed by the shirt and forced harshly into the wall. Ryan came out of his trance and stared into two dark rage filled eyes. He swallowed hard as Kendall tightened his hold on Ryan's shirt. "You're not so tough now are you? You don't mind beating on Logan but when it comes to facing someone as strong as you, you want to back out." Kendall chuckled at Ryan. "You're going to pay for every little scratch on Logan's body." Kendall stepped back and delivered one hard punch to Ryan's face. Ryan fell down the wall but before he could react Kendall was pulling him up again and giving another punch to his face. Kendall held onto Ryan's shirt as he punched and kicked him into a pulp. Ryan wasn't even fighting back as Kendall continued to punch him. After another punch Kendall let go of Ryan who fell to the floor groaning in pain. Kendall was ready to attack him again when he felt hands pulling him back.

"Kendall stop, you're going to kill him." Kendall looked back to see Carlos staring at him. Kendall tried to break free from Carlos' hold so he could go back to beating up Ryan.

"So! That bastard deserves it!" Carlos was about to lose his hold on Kendall when two more hands grabbed Kendall's left side. Kendall glanced over to see James was holding him back as well.

"Kendall I want to kick his ass just as much as you do but you and I both know you need to stop now!" Kendall was thinking about stopping but when he spotted Ryan getting back up he was filled with more rage. Kendall thrashed in James and Carlos' hold trying to get to Ryan so he could punch him again.

"The bastards getting up! At least let me beat him unconscious! James, Carlos let go!"

"NO!" Kendall continued to thrash but stopped the minute he felt to shaking hands wrap softly around his torso. Logan was fisting the front of Kendall's shirt and pressing his body against his back. Kendall could tell that he was still terrified.

"Kendall, please. Please stop… I can't take anymore. Please… I need you." Kendall's eyes soften and his heart broke when he heard Logan's weak and scared voice. Kendall glanced at Logan's arms and saw the nasty cuts and bruises that covered every inch of Logan's arms. Logan even had hand shaped bruises on each wrist. Kendall ran his hands over Logan's arms softly feeling Logan shiver from his touch. Once Kendall reached Logan's hands he grabbed them and turned around pulling Logan into a hug. James and Carlos sighed in relief and joined Kendall in comforting their distraught friend. By this time Mr. Bitters had called the police and they had arrived to find two badly beaten teens. After getting statements from witnesses they arrested Ryan for assault and battery. Paramedics arrived a few minutes after the police and one walked over to the four boys.

"Excuse me I need to take a look at your friend. Kendall nodded and tried to pull away from Logan but Logan tightened his grip and whimpered. Kendall stared at the shaking boy before him before looking at the paramedic and mouthing "give us a minute." The paramedic nodded and stepped over to the side, still watching the boys. Kendall rubbed Logan's back soothingly and reached behind him softly grabbing Logan's wrists. Logan whimpered again trying to keep himself as close to Kendall as humanly possible.

"Logan, it's ok. You have to go to the hospital but don't worry I'm not going anywhere." Kendall was able to get Logan's arms off of him but Logan was still glancing at the paramedic with fear. Kendall cupped Logan's facing making Logan look at him. "I'm going to stay with you don't worry." Logan finally nodded allowing Kendall to lead him over to the paramedic. The paramedic looked him over quickly determining that Logan needed to go to the hospital. When they noticed the fear in Logan's eyes they smiled warmly at him and turned to James, Kendall and, Carlos.

"You three can ride in the ambulance with your friend. I don't mind making room. The three boys nodded and thanked the paramedic as they all climbed into the ambulance. Logan wasn't thrilled about being loaded onto a stretch but according to the paramedics it was protocol.

Once they all arrived at the hospital Logan was brought into a treatment room while his friends were forced to wait in the waiting room. They all sat down on one of the couches in the waiting room and sighed.

"Logan's gunna be ok right?" Carlos looked at his friends with sad eyes. Kendall wrapped his arm around Carlos' shoulder and James did the same.

"Don't worry he'll be ok."

* * *

Logan had been in the treatment room for a good hour and he was mostly patched up. The blood was cleaned off him and all his cuts and bruises were attended to. Logan didn't have any broken bones but his wrist was sprained so he had to wear an arm brace. Also, the gash on his forehead had to be closed up with stitches. The doctor looked Logan over one last time before smiling at him.

"Well Mr. Mitchell you had some pretty nasty injuries but you're going to be good as knew in no time. Your sprained wrist wasn't too bad so you should be able to take the brace off in about two weeks and the stitches shouldn't have to be in that long. Your ribs are bruised and you have a lot of other bruises so I will be prescribing you some pain medication. Make sure you take them once a day." Logan nodded and pulled his shirt back on. The doctor looked down at his chart and smiled at Logan. "Ok, you're almost done. We just have one more test we need to do. It's procedure when it comes to abuse cases so I'm going to need you to remove your pants. Logan tensed up and his eyes widened. He knew exactly what was procedure for abuse cases. He knew what procedure was for everything but he couldn't let this happen. No one could know.

"No." Logan spoke so quietly he wasn't sure if the doctor would hear him but when he saw the doctor glance up at him in confusion Logan knew that he had.

"Son, there's nothing for you to be embarrassed about." Logan looked at his lap and shook his head again, tears starting to fall from his eyes. The doctor sighed and sat in a chair in front of Logan. "If that boy sexual assaulted you, we need to do a rape test so it could be added to the file for the case." Logan let out a small sob as he shook his head again.

"No one can know." The doctor sighed again then looked at Logan. This hasn't been the first time he's dealt with rape victims and he knew if the rape wasn't put on file they would regret it later.

"Listen to me son. If you don't put it on file that boy who attached you won't be put in jail for it. So I'll make a deal with you." Logan looked up at the doctor in confusion. "You let us check you and that portion of the file will be sealed. No one will know until you're ready for them to know but you'll have to tell your friends and family eventually." Logan bit his lip but slowly nodded. The doctor smiled at Logan and called in a nurse who walked in caring a small white box. Logan looked at the doctor again with anxiety.

"You promise, you won't tell anyone. Even though I'm a minor, you won't tell my guardian?" The doctor nodded.

"The patience privacy is the most important thing. If you aren't ready, then I understand." Logan quietly thanked the doctor who smiled in response. "Ok son now you'll need to take off your pants and underwear and once your done with that you can lay on the table." Logan nodded but stopped and looked at the doctor shyly.

"No offence but…." The doctor put his hand up and stopped Logan.

"Don't worry I understand. I should probably go talk to your friends and family anyway." Logan nodded and watched the doctor leave. He sighed before gripping at his pants.

"Let's get this over with."

* * *

Kendall glanced at the clock again for the hundredth time. They had been waiting for news on Logan for at least an hour and the more time that past the more worried Kendall got. Kendall looked next to him when he felt pressure on his shoulder. Carlos was starting to drift into sleep and every now and then his eyes would close. James, like Kendall, was wide awake. He was staring at the floor while he played with a piece of paper. Kendall was starting to wonder where James had gotten it when he heard a doctor walk in.

"Logan Mitchell?" Kendall and James shot up making Carlos who had drifted off into sleep fall to the floor. Kendall glanced down and shook his head at his friend before helping him up.

"Is Logan gunna be ok?"

"Where is he?"

"Can we see him?"

"Don't tell me he's dead!" James and Kendall smacked Carlos for every thinking that and turned back to the doctor who seemed to be amused by them.

"Don't worry; your friend is perfectly fine. He had a lot of bruises and cuts but nothings broken. He also has a sprained wrist and stitches but he won't need those for long." James, Kendall, and Carlos sighed in relief.

"Can we see him?" Carlos asked hopefully. The doctor smiled at him before shaking his head.

"That won't be necessary. Your friend should be coming out any moment." Right on cue Logan walked through the double doors with a nurse walking beside him. The three boys were about to run over when the doctor stopped them. "There's one last thing I need to discuss with your friend so please wait here." They looked at each other but reluctantly nodded. They watched as the doctor walked over to Logan, the nurse handing him a folder with a sad expression. The doctor looked at it quickly and sighed. He patted Logan on the shoulder and whispered something to him. Logan thanked the doctor and walked over to his friends. Once Logan reached Kendall, James, and Carlos they pulled him in for a group hug.

"God Logan, are you ok." They pulled back and Kendall looked at him worriedly. Logan nodded but when tears welled up in his eyes you shook his head instead. Kendall pulled Logan into another hug, which Logan melted into. They stayed like that for a while until Logan pulled back.

"I'm better now." Logan smiled at his friends but his smile fell when he looked at Kendall's cloths. "Kendall, your shirt. There's blood all over it. I'm so sorry." Kendall glanced down taking notice of the blood for the first time. He shrugged his shoulders and smiled at Logan.

"Don't worry about it, it's just a shirt." Logan nodded as they all headed for the exit. They wanted to get home as soon as possible. Especially since Carlos was starting to fall asleep again.

* * *

When they returned to the apartment Carlos collapsed on the couch in order to take a nap. James, Kendall and Logan shook their heads at their friend before walking over to the kitchen to getting something to eat.

"What do you guys want to eat?" Logan said looking through the frig." James and Kendall looked at each other for a moment before pulling Logan away from the frig.

"Hold the phone." Kendall said as he sat Logan down in a chair. "You just got out of the hospital, you're not doing anything." Logan blinked and looked at his two friends standing before him.

"But neither of you can cook." James went to argue but immediately shut his mouth. Logan was right; the thought of Kendall or James cooking something would defiantly end in disaster. Kendall and James looked at each other trying to think of something but they both came up empty. Logan sighed and rolled his eyes. "Why don't you guys just order pizza or something?" Both boys nodded before Kendall walked over to the phone. Logan couldn't help but stare as Kendall walked away. His hips swayed a little and Logan could see his back muscles moving under Kendall's shirt. Logan bit his lip as a blush came to his face. He glanced up at James his eyes widening when he realized he had been caught. James looked confused at first but then a large smirk grew on his face as he looked to Kendall then back to Logan. Logan stood up as quickly as he could and walked toward his room. "I'm gunna go lay done." Tell me when the pizzas here." When he walked into his room James came in right behind him and closed the door.

"I saw that." James said with a sly smile. Logan's blush grew but he tried to act calm.

"S-saw what." James rolled his eyes and crossed his arms across his chest.

"You like Kendall don't you. You were totally just checking him out." James smile grew when Logan bit his lip and looked away. "You know, I think he likes you too." Logan's eyes widened and a smile came to his face.

"Really?" Logan blushed and rubbed the back of his neck. "I-I mean you think so cause t-that would be… ok." James scoffed at Logan before walking out of his room. Logan stared at the door confused until James poked his head back in.

"I'm going to set the two of you up." Before Logan could protest James was gone. Logan laid back down on the bed and sighed. This was going to be interesting.

* * *

James walked back into the kitchen to find Kendall just hanging up the phone. Kendall turned to James and looked around in confusion.

"Where'd Logan go?" James pointed to the hallway.

"Logan went to go lay down. He wants us to get him when the pizza gets here." Kendall nodded before grabbing a soda from the frig. "So speaking of Logan, you're really protective of him aren't you?" Kendall shrugged his shoulders and sat down.

"Well yea. That Ryan guy deserved everything he got and more." James nodded a grimace on his face as he thought of Ryan.

"But you seem to be even more protective of Logan then me or Carlos. Why is that?" Kendall shifted in his seat not looking at James.

"I don't know." James smiled noticing that Kendall was trying to figure that out himself. He got up and patted Kendall on the shoulder.

"Maybe you should think about that for a little while." James walked away knowing he had done his job. Kendall stared at his drink as he thought about what James had just said. Why was he so protective over Logan? Was it just because Logan was the most innocent out of all of them? Or maybe it was because Logan was the smallest. When it came to height James and Kendall had Logan beat and when it came to muscles Carlos had him beat making Logan the smallest. Kendall didn't think that was it though.

"What made Logan different?" Kendall thought. Maybe it was his smile or his eyes or the way his pants hugged his thighs just right. Kendall chocked on his drink a little when that thought went through his mind. He blushed immediately looking around to see if anyone had noticed. He sighed and leaned back into his chair. What did Logan mean to him?

**A/N: YEY! Logan got away. And Ryan got his ass beat! Good job Kendall! Anyway that's the end of this chapter**

**There is more to come. **


	6. Giant stuffy puppy

Logan woke up the next morning shaking, crying, and with a cold sweat. He looked around needing to remind himself where he was when he spotted Kendall in his bed. Logan let out a shaky sigh and walked over to the bathroom. He had no idea what time it was and he really didn't care. Even though he knew it was just a nightmare and that Ryan couldn't hurt him anymore he couldn't help but feel fear. Logan leaned against the sink closing his eyes and trying to steady his breathing. After a few minutes Logan figured he was calmed down enough to go back to bed. He let out another sigh and went to turn when he spotted someone standing by the door. Logan let out scream before falling to the ground and sliding back until he was leaning against the tub. Logan shut his eyes and held his head trying to shut out everything around him. When he felt two hands grip his wrists he cried out letting tears fall from his eyes.

"Logan, it's ok. It's me, it's Kendall. I'm sorry I didn't mean to scare you." Logan opened his eyes to see Kendall sitting in front of him with a look of concern. Logan lowered his arms from his head and began to relax as he fully registered who was sitting before him.

"K-Kendall?" Before Kendall could respond James and Carlos came running each holding a hockey stick. Mrs. Knight and Katie came in carefully behind them. After the four of them took a good look around and deemed everything to be ok they looked to Kendall and Logan.

"Kendall, what's going on? Who screamed?" Mrs. Knight turned her attention to Logan who had tear marks on his face. "Logan, are you ok?" Logan nodded his head while Kendall turned around.

"It's my fault. I heard Logan get up and when I checked to see if he was ok I scared him." Kendall turned back to Logan guilt all over his features. "I'm really, REALLY sorry Logan." Logan nodded and smiled at Kendall before standing up with Kendall's help.

"I'm sorry I woke you guys up." Everyone smiled at Logan before starting to walk out of the bathroom.

"Don't worry about it Logan. I was actually about to wake you boys up anyway so why don't you all start getting ready to go to the studio." James and Carlos nodded as they both ran to their room racing for first use of the bathroom. Mrs. Knight and Katie walked out giving a final smile to both Kendall and Logan. Kendall cupped Logan's cheek and rubbed the area by his nose before pulling away and walking out.

"Why don't you take a shower first?" Kendall blushed and looked away from Logan. "If you need help I'll be in our room and um…" Kendall looked up at Logan who was blushing as well. "Uh… never mind we can talk later." Kendall walked out quickly closing the door behind him. Logan stared at the door for a moment before lifting his hand to were Kendall's hand had been moments before. The warm feeling he felt when Kendall touched him was amazing and he wanted to feel more of it so badly. As he hoped into the shower he smiled as thoughts of Kendall went through his mind. After what happened with Ryan having someone like Kendall, who actually cared for him would be nice.

* * *

The boys were more than halfway done with their long day of recording and for once Logan was happy they spent most of their time standing. His backside was aching the entire day and even though he tried to hide his limp everyone seemed to notice. He couldn't tell them what was hurting. If he did they would know and He couldn't let them know. He couldn't let them know that Ryan not only beat him but Ryan stripped Logan of his innocence. Just the thought of what Ryan did made Logan feel uneasy and it got to the point where he was keeping away from everyone. He wouldn't let anyone touch him and the closest he would let anyone get before starting to feel anxious was at least 3 feet.

"Ok dogs; get in the recording booth so we can finish recording your new song." Logan swallowed hard trying to get passed the lump in his throat. The recording booth was tiny and they were always in there for so long. The idea of being wedged between James and Carlos sent shivers of dread down his spine. He loved James and Carlos and he knew they would never hurt him but thoughts of Ryan kept coming into his mind making him doubt everything he knew. Logan didn't know if he could handle his emotions much longer. Fear, confusion, sadness, hate, anger, guilt, shame; everything was starting to make his head spine. Logan tried to shake it off as he smiled at his friends and stepped into the recording booth. Logan walked in last hoping the being close to the door and only having someone on one side of him would help but he quickly found it didn't work. Logan tried to stop shaking as he felt someone's hand graze his skin. Logan shut his eyes for a moment and took in a deep breath finding relief that he couldn't see.

"Logan, you ok?" Logan opened his eyes to see his three friends staring at him worriedly. Logan managed a smile even though he was panicking on the inside.

"I'm f-fine." Logan swallowed and petitioned himself where the mic could pick up his voice. He closed his eyes again in order to pull himself together. It may have sucked to be in a confined space but the good thing was he didn't need to see for what he was doing. After being in the booth for a very long hour Logan ran out as soon as Gustavo said they could leave. Logan breathed in deeply as soon as he got outside taking in the fresh air. All his doubts and fears faded a little knowing that he was outside.

"Logan!" Logan turned around to see James, Carlos, and Kendall running after him. They stopped for a moment to catch their breath before looking at Logan concerned.

"Why did you run off like that? Is everything ok?" James asked. Logan rubbed the back of his neck looking down.

"Yea, I was just feeling a little claustrophobic in the recording booth. I wanted to get outside for some fresh air before I puked or something." Logan blushed feeling everyone's eyes on him.

"Logan, you should have told us," Carlos exclaimed. Logan looked up to see James and Kendall nodding.

"If you needed a break we would have taken one." Kendall wrapped his arm around Logan's waist reassuringly and even though Logan thought he would have flinched from the touch he leaned into it. Everything that happened earlier must have been a fleeting moment because he was enjoying the warm of Kendall's body more than ever before. Logan smiled at his friends and started walking back to the limo.

"Ok, next time I'll tell you guys." James, Carlos, and Kendall nodded before climbing into the limo.

* * *

When they returned to the Palm Woods they started walking towards the elevator when Kendall stopped Logan from walking any further. Kendall turned to James and Carlos and smiled at them.

"We'll meet you up stairs." Carlos nodded while James smirked at Kendall. Once they were gone Kendall started walking toward the pool, Logan following him. The pool was empty considering how late it was so Kendall picked a random table and sat down. Logan sat down slowly watching Kendall carefully. He wasn't sure what was going on but under Kendall's confidence seemed to be a tint of nervousness. "Logan, I wanted to tell you something that I figured out pretty recently." Kendall swallowed continuing to look anywhere but at Logan. "I was talking to James and he was asking me why I was so protective of you." Logan's heart skipped a beat when Kendall mentioned James. James had obviously gone through with trying to set Logan up with Kendall but did it work?

"Why are you protective of me Kendall?" Kendall sighed and looked right into Logan's eyes. He grasped Logan's brace less hand before continuing.

"I never really thought about it before and at first I just thought it was because I see myself as the leader and I need to protect you. But I don't get as protective with Carlos and James and then I thought maybe it was because they can protect themselves better." Kendall smiled shyly at Logan. "No offence." Logan shook his head and smirked slightly.

"None taken."

"Well anyway, after I figured out that was wrong I finally decided that it was because I cared for you more than James and Carlos. I see them as my brothers but I see you differently than that." Kendall swallowed and squeezed Logan's hand. "I really, really like you Logan and I just wanted you to know." Kendall looked away before continuing. "And I know you probably don't want a relationship because of what happened and I know you might not even like me like that but I just wanted to tell y-" Kendall was interrupted by Logan pressing his lips to Kendall's. Kendall sighed and smiled into the kiss as he wrapped his arms around Logan's waist. Logan wrapped his arms around Kendall's neck moaning as the kiss deepened. They moved their lips together like they had done it a million times. Logan never felt anything like this with anyone else and he knew that this was right. They eventually pulled away and just stared into each other's eyes.

"I really, really like you too Kendall." Kendall smiled and pecked Logan on the lips on more time. Kendall stood up and Logan went to stand up after him but pain shot through him making him whimper and sit back down. Kendall knelt in front of Logan looking confused and worried.

"Logan! Are you ok? What hurts?" Logan bit his lip when he realized where the pain had come from. He racked his brain for a moment before smiling at Kendall.

"Don't worry I'm fine. I just stood up to fast that's all." Logan moved to stand up again Kendall watching him anxiously. Once Kendall deemed Logan ok they walked back into the lobby hand in hand. When they reached the apartment everyone was sitting at the kitchen table eating. Logan couldn't help but blush as everyone wore looks of confusion (except James of course) as they looked to Kendall then Logan then to their interlocked fingers. James was the first to speak.

"So I guess you guys can call me Big Time Rush's matchmaker now." Everyone looked at James their confusion growing as they looked back to Logan and Kendall. Kendall raised his and Logan's interlocked fingers before smiling at everyone.

"Logan's my boyfriend now." Logan blushed a deeper shade of red when he saw everyone's shocked faces. Mrs. Knight was the first to walk over to the boys and give them each a hug. She smiled at them warmly before walking back into the kitchen. Logan and Kendall saw that as an invitation to sit down and eat dinner so they both sat down at the table. Carlos smiled at his friends and gave each of them a high five when they sat at the table.

"Nice, that means there are even more girls for me!" Kendall rolled his eyes at Carlos before laughing, everyone joining in.

* * *

Logan and Kendall walked into their room after dinner and got ready for bed. Logan sat on his bed and stared at the bathroom door waiting for Kendall to come out. Once he walked into the room Logan walked over to him and wrapped his arms around his neck.

"Hi." Kendall chuckled at Logan before bending down a little to kiss him softly on the lips.

"Hi yourself." Logan smiled and laid his head against Kendall's chest.

"I can get used to this." Logan sighed wrapping his hands tighter around Kendall and snuggling into him. Kendall kissed the top of Logan's head and rubbed Logan's back. "I don't know what I'll snuggle against whenever I can't snuggle with you." Both Kendall and Logan laughed as they kissed each other again. Kendall looked toward his closet as an idea came to him.

"I know what you can cuddle with." Kendall walked into their walk in closet as Logan watched with curiosity. After a moment Kendall jumped out with a big stuff dog. "A giant stuffy puppy!" Logan raised an eyebrow then laughed at Kendall.

"I don't remember you taking that." Kendall smiled as he walked over to Logan and handed it to him.

"I took it the day after the photo shoot. Marcos must have forgotten it. I didn't want to admit it but these things are pretty cute so I thought I could give it to Jo or something but I'm glad I never did." Kendall kissed Logan's cheek before moving to his bed and lying under the covers. Logan laughed as he moved over to his bed and put the stuffed animal on the nightstand. He said goodnight to Kendall before he laid down and drifted off to sleep.

Logan shot up out of bed panting and crying. He had another dream about the rape. Logan tried to stay quiet not wanting to wake Kendall up. He covered his mouth muffling the sobs that ripped through him. His heart rate sped up and Logan felt like he was going to die. From every medical book Logan has read he knew he was having a panic attack so the key was to get him calm again. Logan fisted the bed sheet as he breathed in and out slowly. After trying that for a few minutes Logan realized it wasn't working. Logan was shaking and was about to give in and go to Kendall when he spotted the stuffed dog. Logan thought it was a stupid idea but in his desperation he grabbed it and pulled it to his chest. Logan buried his head in the stuffed toy and breathed in deeply. His heart rate calmed and he stopped crying when he realized it smelled like Kendall. Once Logan was completely calm he laid down still clutching the stuffed animal. It wasn't Kendall but it was the next best thing. If Logan went to Kendall then Kendall would start asking questions and Logan couldn't have that.

**A/N: YEY! Kendall and Logan are together. This chapter turned out pretty well but I can't help but think that Kendall realized his feelings too quickly. OH WELL! It worked out in the end. So anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter and there is more to come. **


	7. bad memories

Two weeks past and Logan was going back to the hospital for a checkup. If things went well he would be getting the brace and the stitches removed. Logan looked out the window as they slowly made their way to the hospital. James was in the front seat singing along to the radio while Carlos and Kendall were arguing about what guaranteed more protection a helmet or a condom, really? Logan sighed as they pulled into the parking lot. Mrs. Knight dropped the four boys at the front entrance while she found parking. When Logan walked inside he was going to go to the front desk but the doctor from the last time he was there spotted him.

"Well Mr. Mitchell, I haven't seen you in a while. Your looking a lot better then you did last time." Logan blushed from the complement.

"Thanks, I feel a lot better too." The doctor gestured for Logan to follow so he waved to his three friends before walking through the double doors. The doctor brought Logan to a small room where he took a good look at his head and arm. The doctor instructed Logan to rotate his wrist a couple of times to see how it felt and Logan did it fairly easily. The doctor wrote something down on his clipboard before taking another look at Logan's forehead. He then stepped back and smiled at Logan.

"Well, your injuries healed well. We can take out your stitches and you don't need to wear the brace anymore but still be careful. You're not completely healed yet. Make sure you stretch out your wrist everyday to loosen your muscles and wash your cut so it doesn't get infected." Logan nodded at the doctor and removed his brace. Once the stitches were removed Logan was about to leave when the doctor stopped him. "Son, have you told your friends yet." Logan looked at the ground as he shook his head. The doctor sighed then gestured for Logan to sit down again. "It would be a good idea if you told your friends soon. I already have court officials on my back about getting the medical file. I can't keep it sealed forever. Logan's eyes widened and he could feel tears threatening to fall.

"B-but you p-promised." Logan bit his lip in order to keep the tears at bay.

"Yes and I will keep that promise. I'll be able to stall them for another 3 weeks but after that the boy who attached you is going on trial. If they don't have the medical file that says he sexual assaulted you he won't go to jail for it. I know you don't want to tell anyone but if that boy gets away with only a few months of jail time you're going to regret not coming out about it." Logan nodded as a single tear rolled down his cheek. He brushed it away quickly before standing up. The doctor stood up as well and walked back toward the waiting room with Logan. Before they reached the double doors the doctor turned to Logan. "The next time they come for the file I'm going to contact you. When I do tell me if you want it unsealed." Logan nodded his head in understanding. "My name is Doctor Wells, so look out for a call from me." The doctor walked away and Logan walked through the double doors. He smiled when he spotted Kendall, James and Carlos waiting for them.

"Hey guys, we can go now." They all stood up and headed for the door. Logan grasped Kendall's hand and leaned against him once they were in the car. They sat in silence as Logan looked out the window contemplating his next move.

"Hey Logan, what are you thinking about?" Logan turned to see Kendall staring at him. Logan smiled and kissed Kendall on the lips.

"Nothing really." Kendall fell silent but kept his worried expression. Logan pretended not to notice the worry in Kendall's eyes but he saw it every time. It was becoming increasingly harder to keep his emotions at bay. He was having nightmares and flashbacks about the rape often and hiding it from Kendall was getting harder. Kendall was beginning to suspect that Logan was hiding something from him but whenever he confronted Logan he didn't get anything. Logan had built a wall around something and Kendall couldn't seem to get past to see what that something was.

Logan found that the only thing keeping him sane whenever he would have panic attacks was the stuffed puppy Kendall had given him. He knew it was stupid but it smelled like Kendall and it was almost like Logan was grasping on to his innocence. Mrs. Knight pulled up to the Palm Woods and dropped the boys off. Once they were all out Katie, who had been waiting outside for them climbed in.

"Ok boys, I'm going out with Katie and I'll be back later tonight so be good." They waved as Mrs. Knight drove off and made their way back to apartment 2J. Once inside James and Carlos gathered their pool gear deciding that they needed some R and R.

"Hey Logan, you wanna watch a movie?" Kendall plopped down on the couch smiling at his boyfriend.

"Sure what movie." Kendall contemplated for a moment before shrugging.

"I don't know you pick one." Logan sighed and bent down by the TV to take a look through their movie selection. He moved his fingers over each one before taking in a sudden breath when his finger past a particular movie. It was Never Back Down, the movie Logan had watched on his first date with Ryan and right on the cover was Ryan staring right at him (well the actor who looked like Ryan anyway). Logan sat there frozen feeling like he couldn't move or breath. So many memories were returning causing panic to flow through him. Kendall furrowed his eyebrows when he noticed Logan was shaking slightly. He slowly walked over and peered over Logan's shoulder to see what he was looking at. Kendall's eyes widened when he realized what Logan was staring at. He quickly moved next to him and snatched the movie out of his hand flinging it across the room. James was going to be pissed but it's not like anyone would be allowed to watch that movie around here ever again. Logan snapped out of it as soon as Kendall had taken the movie away. He breathed in deeply before looking at Kendall.

"I don't think I want to watch a movie anymore." Kendall nodded and cupped Logan's face.

"What do you want to do now?" Logan shrugged his shoulders keeping his eyes to the floor. Kendall sighed and crawled so he was next to Logan. He placed his head on Logan's shoulder and gently kissed his neck. Logan turned his head giving Kendall more access as Kendall licked and gently nipped his neck. Logan moaned quietly gripping his knees as he felt the pleasure from Kendall's touch. Kendall moved so he was slightly behind Logan kneeling as he continued his work. Kendall brought his hands to Logan's waist lightly rubbing circles in Logan's sides. Kendall pulled back when Logan began to squirm. Kendall furrowed his brows and ran his hands back over Logan's sides. Logan squirmed again letting out a little squeak. Kendall smiled mischievously when he realized what was happening. "Logan are you ticklish?" Logan bit his lip and tried not to move.

"N-no." Kendall ran his hands over Logan's sides again receiving another squeak and an adorable giggle.

"You little liar! You so are. You know what that means." Logan eyes widened and he tried to get away but Kendall wrapped his hands around him and started tickling him. Logan fell back rolling around kicking and trying to get away. Kendall laughed as Logan giggled and squeaked.

"Kendall stop! I can't take it!" Logan squeaked again as he rolled on his stomach trying to crawl away. Kendall laughed launching himself at Logan and sitting on his legs to stop him from moving.

"No, no, no I'm not done with you yet." Kendall and Logan continued to laugh as Kendall tickled him. Kendall leaned forward so he could reach higher up Logan's sides now having his body fully pressed to Logan's back. Logan stopped laughing as soon as he registered the position he was in. He swallowed hard and tried not to sound panicky as he called out Kendall's name.

"K-Kendal, please s-stop." Kendall immediately noticed Logan's change in tone and jumped off of him. Logan slowly rolled over and sat up leaning against the couch. Kendall knelt down in front of Logan who seemed to be cowering away from him.

"Logan, you know you can tell me anything. Talk to me, please. You're hiding something and I know it. Please tell me." Logan brought his knees to his chest and leaned his chin against his knees. He didn't want to tell Kendall but he knew he had to tell him something.

"It's just… before when you were… on top of me like that, it made me think of that day. I was trying to get away and he did that." Logan closed his eyes as tears spilled over. "I'm sorry, I know you would never hurt me but I just couldn't help but think about it… it just happens." Kendall wiped Logan's tears away and gently kissed his forehead.

"Logan, you have nothing to be sorry for." Kendall cupped Logan's cheek making Logan look at him. "I wish you would talk to me more. Keeping everything inside is just going to make what just happened happen more often. You can trust me Logan, I would NEVER hurt you." Logan sniffed and opened his arms silently asking for a hug. Kendall pulled Logan into his embrace kissing his cheek, forehead, and nose repeatedly. Kendall pulled himself and Logan up onto the couch as Logan began to fall asleep. He leaned against the arm rest with Logan cuddling into his side. Kendall ran his finger through Logan's hair. Logan tightened his hold on Kendall before he finally drifted off into sleep. Kendall continued to stroke Logan's hair as he watched him sadly. He knew that Logan was still hiding something and Kendall was starting to get scared. That wasn't the first time that something they had been doing was triggered a flashback. He didn't mind because he understood that Logan was going to need time before he was completely comfortable again but something wasn't right. Sadly, Logan had been beaten up before but something was different about this. Logan was keeping his emotions to himself and that was so unlike him. Usually he would tell Kendall exactly how he felt or tell him what had happened but Logan hadn't done either of that and every time Kendall or anyone else tried to get something out of him he would tell half the truth. Kendall sighed leaning back and closing his eyes.

"I don't know what to do."

**A/N: *sigh* Logan needs to open up already and he will… but I don't know when yet… well anyway, there is more to come. **


	8. Oh No

**A/N: sorry I haven't updated. I was on a short vacation. But I'm back with chapter 8, I have a feeling things are going to get much harder for Logan.**

Logan woke up the next morning to find that he was on the couch cuddled up to Kendall. He smiled to himself happy that he got to wake up to his boyfriend and it was the first time in a few days that he was able to sleep through the whole night without waking up once. Logan buried his face in Kendall's side pulled himself closer to him. He loved feeling Kendall's warmth. It made him feel safe and at home. Logan was close to falling back to sleep when he heard movement near him. He looked up to see James and Carlos quietly walking through the living room. Logan sat up and rubbed his eyes making his friends notice him.

"Oh Logan your awake." James whispered not wanting to wake up Kendall. Logan nodded his head and quietly got up. He stretched his muscles and glanced at the clock that said 11:02am. He had been asleep for longer then he thought. Logan walked into the kitchen and grabbed some eggs. He cracked them into a bowl and made himself an omelet. Once he was done he sat done joining his two friends.

"What are you guys doing today?" James and Carlos thought for a moment before shrugging.

"We're probably just going to go to the pool." James turned to Logan with a smile. "You wanna come or do you wanna cuddle with your boy toy a little more." Logan rolled his eyes and smacked James' arm. He finished his breakfast and ran to his room to change into his swimsuit. Before he left he left a note for Kendall telling him that he went to the pool with Carlos and James. When they reached the pool Logan sighed and breathed in the fresh air. It had been a while since he came to the pool to relax so he was enjoying every minute of it. Logan sat down on a lounge chair while Carlos and James jumped into the pool. Logan watched his friends play fighting for a while before he leaned back and relaxed. He felt the sun hitting his body and warming him bringing a blissful feeling to him. He wasn't sure how long it would be until he was back to normal but with moments like these he knew he would be ok. Logan suddenly felt cold wetness cover his body as he shrieked and sat up. He rubbed water out of his eyes and looked up to see his two friends standing above him with empty buckets.

"Opps! Sorry Logan our hands must have slipped." Logan glared at Carlos who had an enormous grin plastered on his face. After continuing to glare for a minute he jumped up and stared at his friends with an evil smile.

"You guys are so dead." Logan lunged at his friends who dodged him and ran away. Logan chased them around the pool laughing whenever Carlos or James tripped over something. Logan eventually caught Carlos and pulled him into a headlock laughing as Carlos tried to get free. Carlos was holding back because Logan was still healing but Logan didn't care. It gave him an advantage so he accepted it. Logan's laughed turned into a light giggle as Carlos who was still laughing struggled. Knowing that he had Carlos Logan looked up searching for James when his gaze moved passed someone in the crowd. Logan did a double take and finally fixed his gaze on the entrance to the lobby. Logan let go of Carlos and stood up straight. He rubbed his eyes to make sure he wasn't imagining things but when he opened them again he was certain it wasn't a dream, it was Ryan. Logan looked at Carlos who was getting his breath back and James who was just walking back over. Neither of them had noticed Ryan standing watching them so Logan grabbed Carlos' arm and started calling his name.

"C-Carlos! C-Carlos! Carlos!" Carlos looked at Logan confused as he felt him gripping and shaking his arm. Logan breathlessly said his name as tears rolled down his cheeks. Carlos was about to say something when James walked over.

"Ha Logan, you never caught…" James' smile faded and his brow furrowed when he noticed his friend was crying. Carlos moved in front of Logan gripping his arms.

"Logan what's wrong?" Logan looked at Carlos then over to the lobby as more tears fell. Carlos turned around at the same time as James did. They both gasped when they saw who was standing at the entrance watching them.

"It's R-Rryan." Carlos growled as Ryan began to make his way over. Ryan ignored the gasps and death glares that he got and continued walking until he was face to face with a very angry Carlos and James. The two boys stood in front of Logan who was fisting the back of Carlos and James' shirts. Both boys glanced back to see two shaking hands gripping them and Logan's fear filled eyes peering around James. Carlos and James turned back to Ryan and glared at him.

"What the Fuck are you doing here ass wipe." James wasn't one to curse often but he found this as the perfect situation. Ryan rolled his eyes making Carlos growl at him.

"I kind of live here." Carlos took a step forward so he was in Ryan's face.

"That's where you're wrong. Your ugly fucking face isn't welcome anymore." Ryan glanced around to see people glaring and nodding at what Carlos had just said. Ryan step back from Carlos before continuing.

"Well, this is the only place I have so I guess you're going to have to deal with it for a while." James grimaced at the thought of Ryan being around the Palm Woods but his grimace fell when a thought occurred to him.

"How are you even here? Shouldn't you be in jail getting raped or something?" Logan flinched at James' words and Ryan glanced at Logan smiling. Logan's eyes widened when he saw the look in Ryan's eyes. He didn't look back on that day with guilt; he seemed to be fond of the memory. Logan wouldn't be surprised if Ryan tried to do it again. Logan tightened his fists in James' shirt when he thought of that. Ryan was at the Palm Woods and if he got Logan alone. Logan shuttered before turning around and running through a side door. He didn't care how or why Ryan was there he just wanted to be out of there. Logan thought he heard James and Carlos calling him but he ignored them. As soon as he got to the second floor and into 2J he ran in and ran into his room slamming and locking the door. Logan leaned against the door for a second before running to his bed. He knelt beside it and looked under to see if there was anything there. Seeing nothing Logan grabbed the stuffed puppy and crawled under his bed. He kept himself as close to the wall as he could clutch the stuffed puppy and burying his face in it. Logan continued to shake uncontrollably as he sobbed.

* * *

Kendall was sitting on the couch watching TV when a very frightened Logan ran in and locked himself in their room. Kendall jumped up and stood in the middle of the floor in confusion. James and Carlos ran in a second later trying to catch their breath. Kendall walked over to them and stared at them in concern.

"What happened?" Kendall exclaimed. James breathed in and looked at Kendall.

"We were hanging out by the pool when Ryan showed up." Kendall gritted his teeth.

"WHAT!" James glanced at Carlos before continuing.

"He said something about his parents giving him bail money. We didn't hear the rest cause Logan ran off." Kendall looked towards his room and quickly made his way over. He turned to Carlos remembering that he heard the door lock.

"You know how to pick locks right?" Carlos nodded before running to the kitchen bathroom and coming back with one of Mrs. Knight's bobby pins. He bent it in an odd shape before sticking it in the lock and jiggling it. Once he got the door open he stepped out of the way for Kendall. "Let me go alone first." James and Carlos nodded as they watched Kendall from the door. Kendall looked around then walked over to the bathroom. He stood there confused for a moment until he heard muffled sobs. Kendall listened closely moving to the sound until he was standing in front of Logan's bed. Kendall got on his hands and knees and peered under the bed to see something that broke his heart. Logan was lying near the wall with his face buried in the stuffed dog. Logan was already shaking out of fear but the force of his sobs made him shake even more. Kendall laid flat on his stomach not going under the bed just yet.

"Logan… baby can you hear me? It's me Kendall. Can you come out please?" Logan slid further under the bed trying to get closer to the wall. Kendall sighed and reached his hand under the bed to touch Logan's arm. Kendall soon realized that was a mistake when Logan tensed and pushed himself fully against the wall. Logan curled in on himself holding the stuffed animal to his chest still burying his face in it. Kendall moved forward a little so Logan could hear him better. "Logan it's just me. You know I won't hurt you. No one is going to hurt you. Can you please come out?" Logan finally looked at Kendall but shook his head rapidly.

"H-he's o-out t-there Kendall!" Logan let out a sob as he clutched the toy closer to his chest. Kendall inched forward again.

"Can I come to you then?" Logan looked at Kendall and nodded. Kendall moved the rest of the way to Logan and wrapped his arms around him. Logan moved his arms from around the stuffed toy to around Kendall. Kendall kissed the top of Logan's head as he continued to sob. Logan gripped the front of Kendall shirt and looked up at him.

"Kendall I'm so scared! I don't want him to hurt me again!" Kendall pulled Logan tighter to him and rubbed his back.

"Shhh… it's ok. It's ok. He is never going to hurt you." Kendall continued to comfort Logan until he was no longer shaking and crying. They had been under the bed for so long that James and Carlos eventually came over to see if everything was ok. When they looked under they saw Kendall lying on his back while Logan was curdled up next to him asleep.

"Hey Kendall you alright under there." Carlos was trying not to laugh at how uncomfortable Kendall looked. Kendall turned his head and glared at Carlos before sighing.

"You're so funny. Now help me get out without waking him up." James and Carlos grasped onto Kendall while Kendall held Logan tightly to him. James and Carlos started to pull Kendall out slowly stopping every time Logan was disturbed. Once they were full out from under the bed Kendall sat up and lifted Logan onto the bed. Kendall stretched his muscles groaning slightly. He had been cramped under that bed for way to long. Kendall, James, and Carlos walked out of the room and closed the door gently. Kendall sighed and paced the floor pinching the bridge of his nose. "Ok, why is that bastard here again." Carlos and James looked at each other and shrugged their shoulders.

"We don't know. He knows nobody wants him here but he says he doesn't have any where else to live," James explained. Kendall sighed again when someone walked through the front door. The three boys looked over to see Mrs. Knight and Katie walking in.

"Hey boys." Mrs. Knight dropped her smile when she saw their faces. "What happened?" The three looked at each other before Kendall spoke up.

"Ryan is back at the Palm Woods." Mrs. Knight gasped and walked over to the three boys.

"What?" Mrs. Knight looked around. "Where's Logan?" Kendall pointed to his room and sighed.

"He's asleep. He just spent the last hour hiding under his bed." Mrs. Knight looked at her son sadly before taking out her cell phone. Kendall, James, and Carlos watched her curiously as she angrily dialed a number.

"If that bastard thinks he can hurt one of my boys then he has got another thing coming. I'm getting a restraining order." The three boys blinked as Mrs. Knight walked into her room. They stayed silent for a moment until James turned to the other two.

"Do you think that will be enough?" Kendall sighed and shook his head. Carlos thought for a moment before whipping out his own phone.

"Maybe we should call Kelly. Gustavo could probably get a body guard or something." Kendall and James nodded in agreement while Carlos dialed the number.

"_Hello?" _

"Hey Kelly, its Carlos."

"_Hey Carlos, what do you need?" _

"That jerk Ryan is at the Palm Woods and we're worried he's gunna hurt Logan again." Kelly stayed silent for a moment before taking in a breath.

"_I'll send Freight Train over to your apartment. He should get there in about 20 minutes."_ Kelly paused before continuing. _"How is Logan taking this?"_ Carlos sighed and ran his hand through his hair.

"Not good."

"_It's going to be ok Carlos."_ Carlos said goodbye to Kelly and hung up.

"She's sending Freight Train over." Kendall and James relaxed a little. Freight Train was perfect, he was not someone Ryan would mess with. James, Kendall, and Carlos stayed silent until it was broken by a knock on their door. They all sighed before walking over.

"Is Logan going to be ok? James asked as they approached the door. Kendall sighed and reached for the handle.

"I hope so."

**A/N: OH NOES! Ryan's back and is causing trouble. I hope Logan's going to be ok. You'll have to wait for the next chapter to find out =]**

**There's more to come.**


	9. I'm in control

Before the incident at the pool with Ryan Kendall thought that he was going to break through Logan's wall. Now that Ryan is back at the Palm Woods Logan had gotten even worse. A week past and Logan hadn't left the apartment once. Kendall, James, and Carlos tried numerous times to get him out but he simply refused. Logan was so afraid that Ryan was going to get to him even with Freight Train guarding him 24/7. Kendall didn't want to admit it but he was beginning to get frustrated with Logan. He couldn't stay in the apartment forever and Gustavo was getting angrier and angrier everyday Logan didn't show up at the recording studio. Kendall was tired of getting yelled at and was tired of Logan so today he was going to get Logan out of the apartment no matter what. Kendall finished his breakfast and put his dishes in the sink. He walked past James, Carlos, his mom, and Katie who gave him sympathetic looks. They all knew what he was going to do; he had been doing it every morning for days. Kendall would walk in to find a sleeping Logan. Then he would spend 5 minutes waking him up, 10 minutes pleading with him, 2 minutes arguing with him, and 10 minutes apologizing for being an inconsiderate jerk. This morning seemed to be different though. When Kendall walked in he found Logan sitting on his bed fully dressed. Logan was staring at his bed sheet not moving at all when Kendall walked in.

"I'm sorry." Logan spoke so softly Kendall had to strain to hear him. Kendall sat down next to Logan and grasped his hand. Logan tensed for a second but relaxed when he looked into Kendall's eyes.

"Logan, you have nothing to be sorry for." Logan shook his head and looked away from Kendall.

"I've been ridiculous and I can tell you've been getting frustrated with me." Logan looked up at Kendall. "And I know you guys have been getting yelled at by Gustavo because of me."

"How did you…"

"I overheard Carlos saying he was tired of getting yelled at." So anyway I'm sorry, I want to go with you guys I'm just…. I just can't get myself to do it." Kendall squeezed Logan's hand.

"Logan, I'm here for you. James and Carlos are here for you and my mom and Katie are here for you too. Please stop shutting me out. You can talk to me. If you're scared you can tell me. I'll help you." Logan breathed in and nodded. Kendall and Logan both walked out of the room, Logan clutching Kendall's hand. When they entered the kitchen everyone stopped talking and stared at them. Kendall squeezed Logan's hand reassuringly when he noticed Logan was blushing from all the attention. Mrs. Knight was the first to break the silence by getting up and moving to the kitchen.

"Logan, you should eat before you go. Let me fix you a sandwich." Logan nodded and sat down between James and Kendall. Logan glanced at James and Carlos before dropping his gaze to his lap.

"James, Carlos… I'm sorry." James and Carlos looked at Logan confused.

"What are you sorry for Logan?" James placed his hand on Logan's shoulder.

"I was being ridiculous and you guys were suffering because of it." Kendall didn't say anything as Logan apologized. He knew that it wasn't necessary but he also new Logan wouldn't feel right unless he did it. James patted Logan's shoulder and Carlos smiled at Logan.

"No worries dude you didn't need to apologize." Logan smiled back at Carlos. After Mrs. Knight gave him his breakfast he quickly ate. As soon as he finished Kelly walked through the door.

"Ok guys it's time to…" Kelly stopped as soon as she saw four boys instead of three. She smiled at Logan before gesturing for everyone to go. Logan took in a breath and looked at Kendall. Kendall wrapped his arm around Logan's waist and kissed him on the lips. Logan smiled at Kendall and fisted his shirt as they made their way into the hall. Logan felt safer with everyone with him but the fact that Freight Train was walking right behind them helped too. When they reached the lobby Logan tensed because the first thing he saw was Ryan sitting in a couch by the exit. Logan looked up at Kendall who was glaring in Ryan's direction. Ryan looked up from what he was doing and spotted Logan. He rolled his eyes and quickly made his way to the pool. Mrs. Knight was able to get that restraining order and the fact that Ryan was obeying it calmed him a little.

"Logan you ok." Logan glanced up to see Kendall staring at him. Logan nodded his head and they made their way out of the Palm Woods.

* * *

"It's about time all four of you dogs were here!" Kelly elbowed Gustavo who rolled his eyes at her. The four boys couldn't help but laugh at the power Kelly had over Gustavo. Wasn't he supposed to be her boss?

The day at the studio went by pretty quickly. Logan felt more like himself but different at the same time. He joked and talked to his friends like he used to but he was also surprised to find he was being more "touchy feely" with Kendall. Kendall and Logan had been going out for a while and they hadn't done anything. They would kiss and cuddle but that was it and Logan wanted to do more. He wasn't saying he was ready to go all the way yet but he was starting to feel a little antsy, he hadn't gotten off in a while.

When they all returned home from the studio Logan pulled Kendall into their room. As soon as the door was closed Logan pressed Kendall against the door and attached their lips together. Logan licked Kendall's bottom lip and moaned when Kendall granted him access. Logan moved his tongue around the inside of Kendall's mouth and soon began battling for dominance. After making out for a long time Kendall pulled away. They were both panting and trying to regain their breathing.

"What was that?" Kendall asked. Logan kissed Kendall's lips then continued down until he was sucking and licking Kendall's neck. Kendall moaned at the feel of Logan's tongue against his skin. Logan pulled back and stared at Kendall.

"I'm not ready to go all the way but I thought we could do something more. I trust you Kendall." Kendall nodded and crushed their lips together. He pushed Logan backwards until they landed on Kendall's bed, Kendall hovering over him.

"What do you want to do Logan?" Kendall looked down at Logan with a mischievous grin. Logan bit his lip and pushed Kendall back until he was flat on his back with Logan straddling his hips. Logan bent down and attached his lips to Kendall's neck. He gently nipped his skin and sucked on it. Kendall moaned Logan's name as he continued kiss and sucking on Kendall's neck. Logan moved back to Kendall's lips while he moved his hands slowly down Kendall's chest. Logan licked Kendall's bottom lip begging for entrance while he unbuttoned Kendall's pants. They kissed deeply for a moment but Kendall pulled away and moaned when he felt a hand wrap around his length. Logan slowly moved his hand down to the base and up all the way to the head. Logan flicked the head with his thumb causing Kendall to moan and buck his hips. Logan sped up his hand sensing the Kendall was about ready to explode. Kendall fisted the sheets and let out a short grunt as his hips stuttered from the force of his orgasm. As Kendall caught his breath Logan removed his hands from Kendall's pants and wiped it on a tissue. Logan chucked the tissue into the trash before leaning on his hand and just staring at Kendall. Kendall had his eyes closed while he regained his breathing. His face was flushed and there was sweat on his forehead.

"I love you Kendall." Logan leaned forward kissing the corner of Kendall's mouth and cheek. Logan loved this moment because he had been in control and he still was. He wanted to do this and he had been the one making Kendall moan his name; no one was forcing him to do anything. Kendall opened his eyes and sat up. He stared at Logan for a long moment causing Logan to blush from his scrutiny. "W-what?" Logan stuttered out not able to take the staring anymore. Kendall smile widened and he leaned over kissing Logan.

"That's the first time you've ever said you loved me." Logan swallowed hard and dropped his gaze.

"I-if y-you're not ready to say i-it yet I understand but I do l-love you." Kendall frowned when he heard the shakiness of Logan's voice. He didn't like that he was making Logan cry. Kendall kissed Logan's forehead and looked him straight in the eyes.

"Logan, I love you." Logan smiled letting the tears that threatened to fall, fall but this time it was because of joy. They attached their lips together again, exploring each other's mouths. Kendall pushed Logan back so he was leaning on his back and while he moved from kissing Logan's lips to his neck he cupped Logan through his pants. Logan bucked his hips and moaned Kendall's name. Kendall continued to stroke Logan through his jeans until Logan was withering and moaning.

"K-Kendall…. Please. I need more." Logan could feel Kendall smirk against his neck but before Logan knew it Kendall had moved away from his neck. Logan glanced down through half lidded eyes to see Kendall's face hovering over his waist as he unzipped his pants. Logan gasped when Kendall pulled his dick out moaned when Kendall wrapped his lips around the head. Kendall sucked and twirled his tongue around paying extra attention to what made Logan go crazy. Logan threw his head back and let out a drawn out moan when Kendall took all of Logan into his mouth. Logan fisted the bed sheets feeling his release approaching as Kendall bobbed his head up and down. "Kendall. I gunna…" Kendall held down Logan's hips while he bucked from the force of his orgasm. Kendall sucked Logan through it then swallowing his seed when he was spent.

"Did you like that Logan?" Logan nodded his head as Kendall stuck him back into his pants and crawled up next to him. Once Logan caught his breath he turned toward Kendall cuddling into his chest. Kendall kissed the top of Logan's head before drifting off to sleep. Logan breathed in Kendall's sent and smiled. This moment meant more to him then Kendall would ever know. For starters, Kendall had told him that he loved him and Logan was in control. Most importantly though, Logan enjoyed what they did, showing him that Kendall truly wanted Logan to have everything he ever wanted. Logan closed his eyes his smile never fading. He finally believed he could put all the doubt he had in Kendall, because of Ryan, to the side.

**A/N: ok that's the end of this chapter. The next one is going to get pretty intense so stay tuned.**

**There is more to come!**


	10. Let us help

**A/N: WOOH! Chapter 10! I think you're going to enjoy this chapter**

_Logan awoke shivering and wondering why he was so cold. He glanced over to find that Kendall was no longer in bed with him._

"_Kendall?" Logan whisper-yelled as he stood up. He walked over to the door and glanced both ways finding nothing but darkness. A sudden fear filled Logan as he walked back toward the bed backwards. Something wasn't right; the uneasiness was starting to consume Logan when he backed into someone. Logan sighed with relief and turned around. "Kendall thank-" Logan's eyes widened and he froze when he realized it was Ryan standing before him and not Kendall. Before he could react Ryan threw him onto the bed and started removing Logan's clothes. Logan fought back but Ryan was quick to grab his wrists and pin them to the bed. _

"_You thought it was over didn't you?" Logan closed his eyes and turned his head as Ryan hissed at him. Logan tried thrashing in Ryan's grip but he quickly moved to a kneeling position and kneed Logan in the side. Logan cried out in pain while Ryan continued to beat him._

"_STOP PLEASE!" Logan was relieved when Ryan stopped hitting him but his breath caught in his throat when he felt hands working on his zipper. "NO!"_

Kendall's eyes shot open when he heard someone cry out. He sat up and looked over to see Logan thrashing in his sleep, tears falling down his cheeks.

"No stop please!" Kendall reached over Logan and turned on the desk lamp. He sat up on his knees and began shaking Logan trying to wake him up.

"Logan, wake up your having a nightmare. Logan." Logan continued to thrash, his cries becoming more desperate and filled with more pain. Kendall grabbed Logan's wrists and pinned his arms down trying to stop Logan from accidentally hitting him. "Logan, wake up." Logan's eyes shot open and Kendall almost sighed in relief but stopped as soon as he looked into Logan's eyes. Logan's eyes appeared glazed over and he was breathing erratically. Logan glanced at his pinned wrists and began thrashing again.

"LET GO! STOP IT!" Kendall pulled his hands back quickly, shocked at Logan's outburst. He watched wide eyed as Logan scrambled off the bed landing face first on the floor. A loud sob escaped Logan as he crawled over to the corner on the opposite side of the room. Logan pulled his legs to his chest and held his head with his hands as he shook with the force of his sobs. Kendall stood slowly and started to walk towards Logan.

"Logan, it's just me. It's Kendall." Kendall took another step forward but stopped when Logan screamed.

"STAY AWAY FROM ME!" Kendall tried stepping forward again but was met with the same response. What was going on? The door to Kendall and Logan's room bust open and James, Carlos, Mrs. Knight, and Katie ran in. They glanced around in confusion when they realized no one but Kendall and Logan were in the room.

"Kendall, what's going on," Carlos moved to Kendall's side and furrowed his brow in concern when he saw the fear and confusion on Kendall's face.

I-I don't know. Logan was having a nightmare and when I woke him up he started screaming. He won't let me c-come near him. Everyone looked past Kendall to see Logan rocking himself back and forth staring at the floor in front of him. James walked up behind Kendall to get a better look at Logan.

"Logan, what's wrong. Let us help you." James took a big step forward but froze when Logan tensed. Logan tried pushing himself back further but there was nowhere else he could go. James took another step toward Logan.

"STAY AWAY! LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"Logan it's just James, let him help you." Carlos was starting to get freaked out by the dead look in Logan's eyes. James took another small step forward.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" Kendall pulled James back not wanting Logan to get anymore upset.

"Kendall! Why did you stop me we have to do something!" Kendall glanced over at Logan then back to James who was looking just as freaked out as he was.

"I think he's hallucinating." The three boys glanced back at Katie who was peering around them worriedly at Logan. Mrs. Knight grabbed Katie's arm and pushed her out the door.

"Katie, go to your room." Katie was about to protest but Mrs. Knight gave her a stern look. Katie huffed before glancing worriedly in Logan's direction one more time before heading out the door. Mrs. Knight walked over to the three boys and sighed. "I think your sisters right. It would explain why he looks so out of it." Kendall looked back to Logan to see that he wasn't calmed down in the slightest.

"I can't just stand here like this anymore." Kendall took a few careful steps forward and stopped when Logan cried out again. "Logan you're hallucinating. No one is going to hurt you. Ryan isn't here!" Logan flinched but he still appeared to be trapped in his nightmare. Kendall stepped forward again.

"NO! STAY AWAY FROM ME!" Kendall ignored Logan's screaming until he was almost close enough to touch him. He bent down so he wasn't standing above Logan and glanced back at James, Carlos, and his mom who were watching with concern.

"Logan it's just me. It's Kendall, I won't hurt you. Kendall reached his hand out but Logan only tensed and tried to get away.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Kendall pulled his hand back.

"Logan talk to me please. I know your hiding something from me. You can tell me, please tell me!" Kendall was getting desperate. Nothing he was saying was snapping Logan out of his trance. Kendall looked around the room and spotted something on the nightstand. "James, hand me that." James walked over to the nightstand and pointed to what was on it.

"This?" Kendall nodded his head and James picked up the stuffed animal and threw it toward Kendall. James glanced over at Carlos who looked just as confused as he was.

"What do you need that for?" Carlos questioned. Kendall didn't look back at Carlos when he answered.

"When I found him under the bed he was holding this. Maybe he uses it to calm himself down or something because…"

"Because you gave it to him?" Kendall glanced back and nodded at James. He turned around facing Logan who was gripping the sides of his head harder than ever.

"Logan look at me." Logan stared at Kendall for a long moment before tightly shutting his eyes. He still couldn't see him. "Logan, can you hear me." Logan nodded his head. "Ryan isn't here. He can't hurt you. Please listen to me." Logan opened his eyes revealing that the haze had dimmed.

"K-Kendall?" Kendall reached out and placed the stuffed dog next to Logan who glanced down at it. Logan picked it up and pulled it to his chest, breathing in deeply. "Kendall I can't see you." Logan let out a sob as he clutched the dog closer to himself.

"That's because you're hallucinating but remember no one is going to hurt you." Logan nodded his head trying to fight away the images he was seeing. Kendall watched Logan expectantly as he furiously tried to blink away his hallucination. After a moment of silence Logan glanced around the room, his gaze falling on Kendall. He let out a stuttering sob as he quickly moved into Kendall's arms. Kendall sighed in relief as he wrapped his arms around Logan. James, Carlos, and Mrs. Knight walked up behind Kendall, Carlos and James sitting on the floor and Mrs. Knight standing behind them. Kendall pulled away from Logan and stared at him. "What are you hiding?" Logan's eyes teared up and he looked away from everyone.

"I can't." Logan sat back and pulled his knees to his chest.

"Logan you can tell us we're your friends," Carlos pleaded. Logan glanced over his friends who all wore the same looks of concern. Logan shut his eyes and shook his head, more tears falling.

"Please Logan. Stop hiding things from me. You're only hurting yourself by keeping everything inside." Logan glanced at Kendall but didn't say anything. Kendall put his hands on Logan's shoulders making Logan look up at him. "Why won't you talk about it? What happened that you're hiding from us? Please Logan, tell me. I can't take watching you like this anymore!" Kendall's pleading was starting to work on Logan. He opened his mouth but he couldn't find the words. Kendall squeezed Logan's shoulder reassuringly and moved his hand so it was clutching Logan's hand.

"He… Ryan…" Logan buried his face in his knees as the rest of what he was saying came out in sobs. I didn't want to! I-I didn't want t-to! He made me! I'm sorry! I'm sorry Kendall!" Mrs. Knight covered her mouth holding in a gasp. James, Carlos, and Kendall stared at Logan wide eyed as realization finally hit them.

"Oh my god…" Carlos whispered out. Kendall swallowed hard, he couldn't believe it.

"Logan, are you saying he r-raped you?" Logan nodded his head and let out a quiet sob.

"I'm sorry." Kendall moved next to Logan and pulled him into an embrace.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. It wasn't your fault." Kendall lifted Logan's chin so Logan was looking at him. "Do you understand? It was not your fault." Logan nodded his head hesitantly and placed his head into Kendall's chest. James and Carlos moved closer each placing a hand on Logan's arm and rubbing it comfortingly. They stayed like that until Logan drifted back to sleep. James glanced at the clock and yawned realizing that it was only 1:30am. He and Carlos slowly got up and helped Kendall get Logan into bed. Mrs. Knight pet Logan's hair and kissed Kendall on the cheek before walking out with James and Carlos to go to bed. Kendall leaned down and kissed Logan on the cheek. He didn't go back to sleep but he walked right out of the room and toward the door. He was still wearing the clothes from yesterday so he didn't have to change but even if he was in his pajamas he probably wouldn't have bothered changing anyway. Kendall quietly opened the door and left.

* * *

Kendall banged on the door repeatedly not really caring that it was so early. He waited a moment before banging on the door again. Before Kendall could bang on the door again it opened revealing Ryan. Kendall grabbed him by his shirt and slammed him into the wall so hard it dented. Ryan groaned in pain not understanding what had just happened but he fell silent when he looked into Kendall's eyes. Kendall's death glare could put the devil to shame and his jaw was clenched so hard Ryan thought his teeth would crack. Kendall tightened his grip on Ryan's shirt hearing it rip from the strain.

"Logan told me what you did to him." Kendall's voice was low and foreboding. "I should kill you; I want to." Ryan swallowed hard. Kendall wasn't bluffing. "But Logan wouldn't be happy if I did so consider yourself lucky, but when I come here later this afternoon, and believe me I will, and your still here." Kendall pulled Ryan forward and slammed him into the wall again. "You don't want to know what I'll do." Kendall let go of Ryan watching as he slid to the floor. Ryan glared up at Kendall but Kendall could still see Ryan was afraid of him. Kendall stared at Ryan on last time before walking off. Ryan watched as Kendall disappeared.

"I hate that guy."

* * *

Kendall returned to the apartment to find it was 2:10am. He walked into his room and climbed into bed with Logan who stirred slightly.

"Kendall?" Kendall pulled Logan close to him and kissed him on the lips.

"Shh, go to sleep." Logan rested his head on Kendall's shoulder and fell back asleep. Kendall stared up at the ceiling for a long time before he began drifting off to sleep.

"That bastard better do what I said." Kendall thought before he fell asleep.

* * *

Kendall slowly opened his eyes and almost jumped out of bed when he noticed someone standing inches away from his face.

"Jesus James. You trying to kill me or something?" James smirked and leaned back so he was standing straight up.

"I heard once that if you stare at someone they'll wake up. I guess it works." Kendall rolled his eyes and got out of bed. "We don't have to go to the recording studio until 2 today. Kelly says their getting something ready for us or something." Kendall glanced at the clock, which read 8am. He let out an annoyed sigh and glared at James.

"Then why did you wake me up so early." James rolled his eyes and sat on Kendall's bed.

"We need to talk." Kendall stopped pulling on his jeans for a second to stare at James. He pulled on the rest of his cloths and sat down on his bed.

"Is it about Logan?" James nodded his head.

"Sort of. I heard you leave. What did you do?" Kendall scratched the back of his head and sighed.

"I didn't beat him up if that's what you think. I said some things and left.

"What kind of things?" James stared at Kendall with a raised eyebrow.

"Don't be surprised if Ryan sudden packs his things and leaves." James chuckled and smirked at Kendall.

"He already left." Kendall looked at James confused then smiled.

"I guess I scared him more than I thought. I thought I would have to threaten him one more time before he actually left." James and Kendall laughed again before moving off of Kendall's bed. "How do you know he left?"

"I saw him packing his car when I went for my morning run. I wish I could have seen his face when you talked to him but I'm still worried about Logan." Kendall sighed and nodded his head. He was worried too. Kendall glanced around his room suddenly noticing something.

"Where is Logan anyway?" James pointed out the door before walking out. They walked into the kitchen to find Logan hard at work making breakfast. Mrs. Knight and Katie had left already and Carlos was sitting at the table eyeing the food Logan was making. James sat down next to Carlos and Kendall walked over to Logan. Logan was making bacon, eggs, and pancakes.

"Hey babe." Kendall kissed Logan on the forehead but Logan didn't look up. Kendall stared at Logan until he finally glanced up at Kendall. "What is it?" Logan looked down and flipped the pancakes he was making.

"It's just… you know now and I'm not… I'm like used goods." Logan whispered the end. Some part of him hoping Kendall didn't hear but when he looked up he knew he did.

"Logan, I don't think of you any differently. You're still the same amazing guy that I love. I'm going to be honest, people will act different around you but that's only because they don't know how to act around you. They'll be afraid that anything they say would remind you of what happened." Kendall wrapped his arm around Logan's waist as he finished making breakfast. He kissed Logan's cheek and leaned his chin on his shoulder. "It would help if you talked about it, talked about how you're feeling." Logan shook his head and took the food to the table.

"I don't want to talk about it." Kendall sighed and watched Logan sit down. Carlos was stuffing food into his mouth completely oblivious but James was eyeing Logan concerned. James glanced passed Logan to Kendall. They shared a look of understanding and both sighed. They thought they had finally gotten through to Logan, but they were wrong. Kendall sat down next to Logan and ate his breakfast. He remained silent for most of it, sparing a glance at the others and laughing a little when one of them made a funny joke. Once Kendall finished eating he moved to the couch and flipped on the TV. Logan washed all the dishes and once James and Carlos left to hang by the pool before they went to the studio Logan walked over to Kendall. Logan stood a few feet away not wanting to sit down yet. Kendall glanced over to Logan and noticed how guilty he looked. Kendall muted the TV and sat up. Logan bit his lip looking at the floor. "You're mad at me." Kendall sighed and gestured for Logan to come sit with him. Logan shuffled over to Kendall and sat down next to him. Kendall grabbed Logan by his arm and pulled him close.

"I'm not mad at you, I'm worried about you." Kendall stroked Logan's hair and kissed his forehead. "I just wish you would talk about it. I could help you if I knew what you were thinking or feeling." Logan wrapped his arms around Kendall's torso and buried his face in his neck.

"I don't want to remember it. I don't want to remember what I was thinking or what I was feeling." Kendall squeezed Logan reassuringly.

"The only way for you to forget is to remember." Logan looked up at Kendall weirdly.

"That's doesn't make any sense." Kendall cupped Logan's cheek, glancing down at him.

"It does make sense. Don't look at it ana-ly... analyli…"

"Analytically?"

Yea that. The only way for you to move passed it is for you to get everything out." Logan thought about it for a moment and nodded.

"I know your right but… I just can't." Kendall nodded his head and kissed Logan's lips.

"Ok. When you're ready I'll be here to listen." Kendall glanced at the clock and stood up. "We better go get Carlos and James so we're not late." Logan stood up and laced his hand with Kendall's. They smiled at each other before walking out the door.

* * *

"I have never been this tired in my life." Carlos plopped down on the couch groaning. Kendall and James plopped down next to him both groaning as well.

"Gustavo worked us to death. I don't know if my muscles will ever recover." James lifted his arms testing how sore they were. He winced and dropped them to his sides. Logan walked past the couch to his room not noticing the looks of concern his friends gave him. When Logan reached his room he plopped down on his bed and let out a satisfied sigh, his bed had never felt more comfortable. Logan rolled over and covered his eyes with his arm. He laid there for a while but suddenly felt something touch his wrist. Logan jumped and looked around. He soon realized that it was only a piece of paper that had fallen off his nightstand. Logan ran his hand through his hair and sighed. He wasn't sure how much longer he could take this. The pressure was getting to him. Logan stood up and walked to the bathroom. He stood in front of the sink and leaned against it. He took in a shaky breath and turned on the sink. He splashed his face with cold water and dried his face. He took a look at his reflection and stared at himself. Just by looking at himself he looked fine but on closer inspection that wasn't the case. Logan could see the pain, fear, and misery in his eyes. Logan looked away not wanting to look at himself anymore when he noticed a pair of scissors on the counter.

"I can't do that. I can't even think it." Logan said to himself. Logan stood up straight but kept his eyes on the scissors. He didn't want to kill himself but he couldn't help but wonder what cutting would feel like. Would it bring him the release he needed? Logan picked up the scissors and opened them. His hand was shaking as he eyed the sharp blade. Logan held one side of the blade to his wrist just staring at it. Could he really do this? Logan shook his head and put the scissors back on the counter. "I can't do it."

"Good." Logan jumped and looked toward the door to find Carlos staring at him.

"C-Carlos… I didn't… I wasn't." Carlos grabbed Logan's wrist and pulled him out of the bathroom.

"You sure looked like you wanted to though." Logan mentally cursed himself. If he was going to do something that stupid the least he could have done is been smart about it. Why didn't he close the dam door? Logan let Carlos pull him all the way to the living room. He stopped in front of Kendall and James who looked at them with furrowed eye brows. Carlos put the scissors on the table in front of the couch. Logan didn't even notice him take those. "Logan was in the bathroom with these." James and Kendall went wide eyed. They quickly moved in front of Logan who was staring at the floor fighting back the tears that were sure to come. Kendall grabbed Logan's chin forcing him to look at him.

"Logan, why would you even think about doing that?" Logan's bottom lip quivered and he pulled his face away from Kendall.

"I don't know. The scissors were there and I just…" Logan trailed off not wanting to continue. Kendall sighed and looked at James and Carlos.

"Logan, cutting your self isn't going to solve your problems. We talked about this; you have to talk to us!" More tears fell from Logan's eyes and Kendall felt guilty for yelling at him. Kendall shook the guilt away and took out his phone. Logan looked at him confused while Kendall dialed his phone.

"What are you doing?" Logan asked fear in his voice. Kendall glanced at Logan with sympathy.

"You won't talk to us on your own we'll find someone who will help. I'm calling Kelly and getting you help." Logan's eyes widened and he stepped away from Kendall.

"Getting me help? I don't want to go to a therapist! I don't need one! I told you I don't want to talk about it!" Kendall ignored Logan and put his phone to his ear. More tears spilled from Logan's eyes as he walked off to his room and slammed the door behind him. Kendall winced at the sound of the door slamming and glanced at James and Carlos who were looking toward Logan and Kendall's room sadly. The phone rang a couple of times when Kendall heard Kelly's voice.

"Hey Kelly its Kendall, I need a favor."

**A/N: FINALLY! They know. I know how much you have been waiting for that. So… Kendall is getting Logan a therapist. And I'm gunna warn u the next chapter is going to be a little weird… maybe sci-fi ish but only the next chapter. I thought of what I'm doing for that chapter when I first started writing this and I really wanted to have one chapter with it so anyway I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**And there is more to come!**


	11. watch it all over again

**A/N: wow this chapter got pretty long. Well I hope you enjoy =]**

Kendall walked over to his door to check the lock. The previous day Logan had locked him out forcing him to sleep on the couch. Kendall couldn't help but think the situation made them look like some TV married couple were the wife gets upset with the husband and forces him to sleep on the couch.

"Heh… that means Logan is the wife." Kendall shook the funny thought from his mind when he realized the door was unlocked. He had more important things to do. Kendall slowly opened the door to find Logan lying on his bed facing the wall. His arms were crossed over his chest and Kendall didn't need to see his face to know he was scowling. Kendall walked over to the bed and sat down. "Hey babe." Kendall touched Logan's shoulder but Logan slapped his hand away. Kendall sighed and drew his hand back. "Please don't be like that. This is for your own good." Logan turned so he was on his back leaning on his elbows. He stared angrily at Kendall as tears fell down his cheeks.

"I don't care if it's good for me! I don't want to go!" Kendall wanted to give up at that moment.

"_Ok Logan you don't have to go."_

"_Really! Yey Kendall you're the best boyfriend ever!"_

But Kendall couldn't do that. "Logan you have to go. You tried to cut yourself! And you refuse to talk about it. You need to talk about it!"

"I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT! WHY ARE YOU BEING SO MEAN TO ME?" Logan rolled back over so he was facing the wall again. Kendall's heart broke but he knew this had to be done. He rubbed Logan's arm and kissed his head before standing up.

"The appointment is in an hour, you should start getting ready." Logan clenched his jaw at Kendall's words. He could not seriously be making him do this. Without thinking Logan stood up facing Kendall who was already walking out.

"No." Kendall stopped in his tracks and turned toward Logan. Logan watched Kendall as he walked over to Logan's dresser. He pulled out a pair of jeans, a v-neck t-shirt, a pair of boxers, and socks. He walked over to Logan and shoved the clothes to his chest. Logan looked down at the clothes but didn't grab them. "I'm not going. You can't make me." Logan swallowed hard as Kendall leaned towards him. His face was void of any emotion.

"Get dressed and be ready or I'll tell everyone what you used to do in your basement." Logan's breath caught in his throat and his eyes widened.

"You wouldn't, you promised!" Kendall shoved the clothes into Logan's chest again. Logan took a hold of the clothes staring at them for a moment. He looked up at Kendall with more tears in his eyes. "I hate you so much right now Kendall." Logan turned and stomped toward the bathroom. "I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!" Kendall winced when he heard the door slam shut. He sighed and walked into the living room where he was met with four pairs of sympathetic eyes. Kendall shuffled over to the couch and plopped down. He slid almost all the way down letting out a loud sigh. Mrs. Knight walked over to the couch and sat down next to Kendall.

"Kendall honey are you going to be ok doing this alone." Kendall sat up a little and sighed.

"Yea, you don't have to worry mom. Me and Logan will be fine alone." Kendall turned toward the kitchen when he heard someone scoff at him. James and Carlos walked into the living room standing before him with crossed arms.

"You can't seriously think me and Carlos aren't coming with you." Kendall went to argue but was interrupted by Carlos.

"We're coming. Logan needs us just as much as he needs you and we're not going to let you be the only one that Logan takes his anger out on." Kendall smiled at his friends and nodded. He was actually hoping that they would fight him on this. Everyone went silent when they heard the door to Kendall and Logan's room open. Logan walked out saying hi to Mrs. Knight and Katie but glared at James, Carlos, and Kendall. Logan walked toward the front door and turned around when he opened it.

"Are we going or what," Logan hissed out. Kendall, James, and Carlos all shared a look as they started walking toward the door. When they got into the hallway Logan was already by the elevator leaning with his side against the wall and his arms crossed. He was glaring as he waited for the elevator to open on their floor.

"James, Carlos I don't know if I can do this. I don't want him to hate me." James and Carlos patted Kendall's shoulders as they made their way over.

"Don't worry buddy we're here for you." James glanced over at Logan with a smirk. "He may hate you now but I hear make up sex is amazing." Kendall slapped James' chest and a blush came to his face. They were laughing until they reached the elevator. When they saw Logan giving them a death glare they all fell silent.

"Come on Logan, don't be mad at us," Carlos pleaded. Logan walked into the elevator and leaned with his side against the wall again.

"I'm not talking to you." Carlos, James, and Kendall sighed as they all stepped into the elevator. This was going to be hard.

* * *

They had been sitting in the waiting room for at least 20 minutes and Kendall was starting to get fidgety. He couldn't stand the way Logan kept glaring and every now and then the glare would be aimed at him. The door to the office finally opened and a slender woman walked out. She was average height with short blonde hair and hazel eyes. She walked over to the four boys with a huge smile.

"Hello my name is Nicole Trager and I'm the psychologist here. Kendall, James and Carlos stood up and to shake her hand.

"Hi I'm James."

"I'm Carlos."

"I'm Kendall." Dr. Trager smiled at Kendall.

"Yes, Kendall… we spoke on the phone. I believe Kelly Wainwright gave you my number." Kendall nodded. Dr. Trager turned her attention to Logan who was sitting in his chair awkwardly. Logan didn't like being rude to adults but his anger overshadowed that. Dr. Trager walked over to Logan and kneeled next to him. She placed her hand on the arm of the chair to steady herself. "Hello, you must be Logan." Logan shifted in his seat, sparing a glance at her.

"Hi." Dr. Trager smiled at Logan.

"We can start our session now so you can come into my office." Logan glanced at the door shifting in his seat again.

"I don't want to." Logan glanced at Dr. Trager who was only smiling at him.

"That's ok Logan we can sit here and talk. We can talk about whatever you want. I hear you like hockey. Do you like hockey Logan?" Logan nodded shifting in his seat again. "How long have you played hockey."

"I think I started playing real hockey when I was 6 but my mom says I used to us as spoon to knock cheerios off my high chair." A smile tugged at the corners of Logan's mouth as he thought of a baby using a spoon as a hockey stick. Dr. Trager's smile widened.

"Your mom must have been happy when you stopped hitting your food and started hitting real hockey pucks." Dr. Trager glanced back at her office then turned to Logan. "Are you sure you don't want to go sit down in my office Logan. There is more room and I know these chairs are so uncomfortable. Logan looked up toward the door. Kendall, James, and Carlos were standing by the door watching him. He didn't want to go in but he also didn't want to risk Kendall saying certain things so he hesitantly nodded. Dr. Trager smiled and stood up. She waited for the four boys to walk into the office before closing the door. She sat down in a chair across from the four boys who sat in a very large couch. James and Carlos sat at the ends while Logan and Kendall sat in the middle. James and Kendall tried sitting directly next to Logan but when Logan glared at both of them they moved over a little. Thank god it was a big couch. Dr. Trager watched the boys before writing something down on her clipboard. She crossed her legs before turning back to Logan. "So Logan, what else do you want to talk about?" Logan shrugged his shoulders without looking up.

"I don't know." Dr. Trager glanced at the three other boys then turned her attention back to Logan.

"How about your friends; have you known each other long." Logan kept his eyes on his lap as he nodded. "How long have you known them?" Logan thought about it for a moment then looked up at Dr. Trager.

"Since I started playing hockey." Dr. Trager smiled at the boys and wrote something down on her clipboard.

"You seem to be really close to each of them, their your best friends?" Logan nodded and glanced at Kendall before returning his gaze to his lap.

"Kendall is also my b-boyfriend." Kendall went to hold Logan's hand but Logan pulled away. Kendall wasn't out of the dog house yet. Dr. Trager smiled at them and continued to write things down.

"How sweet. I can tell your friends car about you but you seem to be distant from them. Are you mad at them?" Logan nodded his head.

"I didn't want to come here but they made me." Dr. Trager nodded in understanding.

"How did they make you come here Logan?" Logan shifted in his seat.

"Kendall said he would tell everyone something I didn't want anyone to know if I didn't come." Logan glared at Kendall who looked between Logan and Dr. Trager with guilt. Dr. Trager smiled slightly at Kendall who was shifting in his seat awkwardly.

"It may have seemed cruel Logan but I can tell he only did that because he loves you. You love Kendall too, don't you?" Logan nodded his head.

"Most of the time." Dr. Trager smiled at Logan who smirked back. Kendall pulled on the collar of his shirt. He was going to be sleeping on the couch for a while.

"How long have you and Kendall been dating?" Dr. Trager asked.

"A little over a month." Logan watched Dr. Trager carefully. He knew that she was trying to bring the conversation to what happened to him but he wasn't sure when.

"And you started dating after the incident." There it was the one question that would bring Logan exactly where he didn't want to be. Logan pulled his legs onto the couch; bring his knees to his chest.

"Yes." Dr. Trager noticed Logan's discomfort.

"We don't have to talk about that day if you don't want to Logan. But do you think you can tell me a little about Ryan? How did you meet?" Logan wrapped his arms around his legs and leaned his chin against his knees.

"I met him when I was alone at the pool. He came up to me and we started talking. I mentioned that he looked like that one actor from the movie Never Back Down and how it was funny that his name was Ryan. He asked me if I wanted to hang out with him and I said yes so we went back to his apartment and watched a movie."

"Was this your first date?" Logan nodded his head. "What happened while you were with him?"

"Nothing significant. After the movie I went home and he texted me asking if I wanted to go on another date."

"What happened on your second date?" Logan tightened his grip on himself and swallowed hard.

"After we ate we sat on his couch and talked. I asked him if he wanted to be exclusive and he said yes. He kissed me but I realized I had to go so pulled away but he just started kissing my neck." Logan kept his eyes on the floor. He was embarrassed to be telling this but he also felt embarrassed because what happened was a clear indication to the type of person Ryan was. How could he have been so stupid? "I tried pushing him off me but he wouldn't so I told him to stop but he just bit down on my neck really hard so I yelled at him and he stopped.

"What did Ryan say to you when he stopped?"

"He said he was sorry and that he got carried away." Logan bit his lip as a single tear slid down his cheek. "I was so stupid. I should have seen who he was there." Kendall wrapped his arm around Logan and was happy to find that he didn't pull away. This was the first time that he was hearing about this. This would actually be the first time that Kendall, Carlos, and James heard anything about Ryan. Logan was hiding a lot more then they realized. Dr. Trager grabbed a box of tissues and placed them on the table in front of Logan.

"You're not stupid Logan. It's obvious to you now because you know what type of person he is. Before you had no idea what Ryan was capable of; this happens to a lot of people." Dr. Trager sat back in her seat and sighed. "So, why don't you tell me about the days leading up to the incident.

* * *

Kendall, James and Carlos sat quietly as they listened to Logan talk. He had gone through every moment that he had with Ryan and most of it was hard to listen to but they knew what Ryan had done to Logan before, what Dr. Trager referred to as the incident, was nothing. Logan finished with the day before he was raped. He told her how Ryan pushed Logan into a wall when he raised his voice at Ryan. Logan silently watched Dr. Trager write a few more sentences before looking up at Logan.

"That must have been tough to deal with, but it seems to me that having your friends really helped." Logan nodded and leaned into Kendall's side. "Before we talk about Ryan anymore I would like to hear from the others." Kendall, James, and Carlos shifted a little not expecting to be put on the spot. Dr. Trager turned to Carlos and smiled. "Why don't you start Carlos. How does everything you've just heard make you feel?" Carlos played with the hem of his shirt as he kept his eyes on the floor.

"Ashamed." Everyone furrowed their eyebrows at Carlos.

"Why do you say that?" Carlos took in a breath still looking at the floor.

"I should have seen it. I should have done something sooner. Logan's my best friend; I'm supposed to protect him. I should have done something." Carlos looked up with teary eyes. "I should have saved him." Logan reached across Kendall and grabbed Carlos' hand. He squeezed it and gave Carlos a reassuring smile before pulling his hand away. Dr. Trager smiled at Carlos and pushed the box of tissues toward him.

"You shouldn't feel ashamed Carlos. Having never dealt with a situation like this before you can't be expected to spot something right away. What matters is that you're here for Logan now." Carlos nodded and smiled. Dr. Trager turned her attention to James. "What about you James." James cleared his throat.

"I feel conflicted. I want to leave Logan alone and let him come to us when he wants to but I also want him to talk to us now. I want to leave Ryan alone and let the courts handle it but I also want to find him and rip his stupid head off. I just… I don't know." James blushed and looked at his lap. He wasn't sure if he was making any sense.

"I understand what you're saying James and it makes sense for you to feel this way. You're at war with your brain and heart. Your heart tells you to leave Logan alone and get revenge for him but your brain tells you that's wrong. You want to do the right thing but you're not sure how. James, doing the right thing isn't easy but what you're doing now is right. You're helping Logan." James nodded and smiled. "Kendall, what do you have to say?" Kendall pulled Logan closer to him before he spoke.

"I'm angry. I'm angry at Ryan because he did this. I won't to find him and I want to kill him. I've never hated someone so much in my life. But the one person I'm angrier at is myself." Logan looked up at Kendall with furrowed eyebrows but Kendall kept his gaze to the opposite wall. "I'm supposed to be the leader. I'm supposed to protect my friends. I should have stopped Ryan. I knew he was bad news from the start but I didn't do anything. I should have protected Logan and I should have made sure that nothing like this ever happened. I should have stopped it. I shouldn't have been so blind." Logan scooted over so he was closer to Kendall and leaned against his chest. Logan held Kendall's hand while Kendall's other hand was securely wrapped around him.

"I can see how much Logan means to you and it's understandable that you would feel that way. You have to remember that you're not perfect and you may have thought Ryan was a bad guy but you didn't really know exactly what was off about him. All you can do now is be here for Logan and give him all the love you have to offer." Kendall nodded and kissed the top of Logan's head. Logan smiled and leaned closer to Kendall. Dr. Trager smiled and returned her attention to Logan. "Now Logan, do you think you're ready to talk about what happened?" Logan tensed and he fisted Kendall's shirt. Kendall placed soft kisses to his head while whispering in his ear.

"I don't know…" Logan looked at his friends with pleading eyes. He didn't want to remember. _"Please don't make me remember,"_ Logan thought as he looked at each of his friends. Dr. Trager placed her clipboard on the table and straighten herself.

"With situations like this it's easier for everyone to understand if the incident is looked back at from a different perspective." The four boys looked at her weirdly. "There is a way that you can recall your memories from that day and examine them. You can see everything from a different angle." Logan sat up in his seat.

"Like memory analysis (1)." Dr. Trager nodded her head and got up from her seat. When she came back she had an alarm clock and a pendulum. She placed them both on the table and sat down again.

"Ok I want you boys to sit back and hold each other's hands. You need to stay connected for this to work. You're going to examine each one of your memories so you can fully understand what you went through that day. Now the alarm clock is here just in case we need to snap you out of the memory but you should be fine. Now, sit back, close your eyes, and focus on the sound of the pendulum." All four boys did what Dr. Trager told them. They listened to the constant ticking and soon all other sounds went silent.

"_Tick… tick… tick… tick…" _Before the boys knew it the ticking had stopped. The each opened their eyes in confusion not thinking anything happened.

"Dr. Trager that didn't…" Logan stopped when he realized they were back in their apartment. He looked to his friends who were looking around to. "What's going on?" James, Kendall, and Carlos continued to look around dumb founded.

"I don't know Logan AH!" Kendall, James and Logan turned to Carlos to see what happened.

"Carlos what is it?" Carlos pointed to the hallway and everyone gasped when they realized what was up. "Logan… that's you!" James exclaimed. Standing a few feet in front of them was Logan, or rather another Logan. The four boys walked over to "other Logan" and stood in front of him. Kendall waved his hand in front of his face and tilted his head.

"Can he see us?" Logan looked closely at "other him" then stepped back.

"I don't know but, Dr. Trager said we're examining our memories from a different perspective so this isn't another me it's a memory. We're watching ourselves from the outside." Logan gestured to the other Logan's outfit. "That's what I wore when I broke up with Ryan. This is the memory of that morning." Carlos, James, and Kendall turned to Logan wide eyed. They understood what he was saying but how was this possible. James stepped in front of other Logan and examined him.

"But why aren't you doing anything. It's like you're frozen." Logan thought for a moment, his expression changing when he figured it out.

"It's our memories so we control it. It's like a movie; I'm not doing anything because I haven't "pressed play yet." The other's looked at him confused. "It's my memory, I'm not thinking about it so nothing's happening. Watch." Kendall, James, and Carlos watched as other Logan came to life.

_Logan had planned on going straight to the kitchen but stopped short when he heard a thump and a yelp from his and Kendall's room. _

James, Kendall, Carlos and Logan followed "other Logan as he walked back to his and Kendall's room.

_He walked inside and couldn't help but crack a smile when he found Kendall sprawled out on the floor._

"Nice one Kendall. *smack* "OW!"

_"Hey Kendall, rough morning?" Kendall stopped trying to untangle his legs from his blanket and narrowed his eyes at Logan._

_"Ha ha, very funny." Kendall finally untangled himself and stood up. He stretched his muscles and Logan couldn't help but stare as Kendall's muscles flexed and stretched. Logan tore his eyes away not wanting to risk him noticing._

"You totally were checking me out." Kendall smirked at Logan who was beat red.

"I was not!" Logan squeaked. Kendall turned his attention back to himself and Logan.

"Now that I'm in this it's my memory too right." Kendall turned to Logan who nodded. "Ok let's fast forward then. Before they knew it they were no longer in Kendall and Logan's room but in the kitchen where they say other James, Kendall and Carlos.

_"We have to find Logan and get to the bottom of this. If something is wrong we need to be there for him but let's just hope we're being paranoid." Carlos wiped the rest of his tears away and put his helmet on his head patting it twice and James nodded at Kendall with determination in his eyes. They all left the apartment and split up deciding they would find their friend faster. They needed to get to Logan before Ryan did._

The four boys followed their memories down to the lobby. They stopped and looked in every direction.

"Which memory do we follow," Carlos asked. Logan sighed and turned to Carlos.

"You can watch all of them. One of you focus on one and then watch it after that we rewind and start a different memory." Carlos nodded then closed his eyes.

"There you are Carlos." Carlos opened his eyes to see James pointing to a chair.

"I remember. After I looked around the pool I sat down because I couldn't find anything." Logan looked around accessing his own memory. The boys looked around realizing they were back in the lobby. "Who pulled us back here?" Logan pointed to the elevator making the other boys turn. They watched as Logan walked across the lobby and through the doors leading to the stair case. A few seconds later Kendall, James, and Carlos exited the elevator. Kendall smacked his head and kicked the air.

"Dam it! I knew we should have taken the stairs!" They had only missed Logan by a few seconds. That was the most frustrating thing Kendall has ever witnessed. James was the next to recall a memory. They ended up out by the pool watching James sink into a chair.

"I remember this. I texted you guys to meet me." They watched as other James got up and left the pool area. James sighed and turned to the others. "What is this doing exactly? All this is showing is that we were looking for you down here while you were upstairs with Ryan. This isn't helping." Kendall patted James shoulder and before they knew it they were in Palm Woods Park. They watched as Kendall talked to Jo and walked back up to apartment 2J.

"Kendall you went back to the apartment?" James asked. Kendall sighed as he watched his other self running around.

"Yea but I didn't find anything."

_Kendall stopped walking and looked around for a moment. He swore he had heard someone called his name but he didn't know where it came from. Kendall looked around the empty hallway for a moment just listening. It was eerily quiet and Kendall was starting to get freaked out. Kendall jumped when he felt his phone vibrate, he pulled it out to see he had a text from James. Kendall took another look down the hallway before running down the stairs to meet with Carlos and James._

Kendall stopped the memory and stared at himself. He thought he was imaging it the first time but he swore he heard something.

"Kendall what are you doing." Kendall turned to find Logan staring at him. This was Kendall's memory so they couldn't control it. They could only watch as Kendall kept it paused. Kendall rewound it and stopped again.

"Listen."

_Kendall stopped walking and looked around for a moment. He swore he had heard someone called his name but he didn't know where it came from. _

"I swear I heard someone call my name." James and Carlos looked at each other for a second. They heard it too. Logan stood their silent for a moment until realization hit him.

"Oh my god." Logan covered his mouth and leaned against the wall. Kendall, James, and Carlos were beside him in seconds.

"Logan what is it." Logan turned to Kendall with tears in his eyes.

"That was me Kendall. I called out to you." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows.

"What?" Logan closed his eyes not wanting to see Kendall's reaction.

"Ryan's apartment is just down the hall. That was me… I screamed your name." Kendall's eyes widened and he took a few steps back. He covered his eyes with his hands and sighed loudly in frustration. Kendall was down the hall from Logan when he was raped. Logan screamed for Kendall when he was being raped. Kendall heard Logan being raped. He didn't do anything about it. Kendall leaned against the wall and slid down. He kept his eyes covered not wanting people to see him this vulnerable. Logan, James, and Carlos walked over to Kendall and sat around him. Kendall let out a small sob and buried his face in his knees.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I should have known. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry." Logan hugged Kendall's head and stroked his hair.

"It's ok Kendall. You didn't know. Even if you realized something it would have been too late." Without Logan realizing it he had recalled the memory with Ryan. Everyone looked around when they found they were in Ryan's apartment. "Shit!" Logan hissed out. "I didn't want to do this!" Logan tried to pull back from the memory but nothing happened. Logan got up and went for the front door. He pulled on the handle and banged on the door but it wouldn't open. "Why won't this door open?" Logan banged on the door harder. "OPEN DAM IT! I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE!" James, Carlos, and Kendall watched Logan in shock until they heard a scream from the other room. Logan flinched when he heard it and tried getting out again. "LET ME OUT!" Kendall got up and wiped his tears away. He walked over to Logan and grabbed him from behind.

"Logan stop it won't open." Logan buried his face in Kendall's chest as Kendall held onto his wrists. "Why won't it open? I don't want to be here." Everyone turned when they heard a loud thump from another room.

"Logan you have to do this that's why the door won't open. You can't leave until you show us what happened." Kendall started pulling Logan who was struggling.

"I d-don't want to. No, please!" Before Logan could protest anymore they arrived in front of the door just in time to see Logan get punched in the face. Kendall tightened his grip around Logan as they all stood by the door silently watching.

_Logan sat up and clutched his hand to his face trying to suppress the throbbing pain. He inched backward until he was pressed against the far wall crying as Ryan started moving over to him. His body shook and his lip quivered as Ryan's body slowly began to block out the light coming from the door._

James swallowed hard. He needed to watch this but he didn't know how much he could stomach. James flinched when he felt someone grip his hand. He looked over to see that Logan was huddled into Kendall's side but his hands were gripping James and Carlos. Logan must have reached out for Carlos at the same time as him because Carlos had a similar expression on his face. James and Carlos moved closer to Kendall and Logan still holding Logan's hand. Kendall pulled Logan closer to himself as they all watched.

_In a last effort to get away Logan stood up and jumped onto Ryan's bed then onto the floor again. He was almost out the door when he felt to arms wrap around his waist pulling him back. Logan grasped onto the door frame but it didn't do him any good._

_"NO! STOP PLEASE!" Ryan ripped Logan's hands from the door and slammed him into the wall._

All four boys flinched at the sound of Logan hitting the wall. They watched as Logan hit Ryan but was unsuccessful at getting away.

_Ryan grabbed his shirt and threw him to the floor. Before Logan had time to think Ryan placed a hard kick to Logan's back. Logan cried out and rolled away but that only allowed Ryan to now kick his stomach and chest. Ryan went to kick Logan again but Logan grabbed his leg and held on to him._

_"LET GO OF ME YOU LITTLE SHIT!" After Ryan determined that he couldn't shake Logan off his leg he reached down and grabbed Logan by his hair. Logan screamed as he was roughly tugged off the ground. He held Ryan's wrist trying to lessen the pain in his head but it didn't help. Ryan used his free hand and punched Logan in the gut making Logan cry out again. After Ryan punched him once more in the gut he let go of Logan's hair and delivered one hard punch to Logan's face making him fall back. Logan clutched at his stomach sobbing over the pain._

Kendall clenched his jaw and gripped onto Logan tightly. Logan was crying silently as he watched the display in front of them. Carlos and James squeezed Logan's hands both of them trying to keep down their lunch.

_Ryan bent down next to Logan and grabbed his wrists pinning them above Logan's head. Logan tried pulling away but once again his attempts proved futile._

_"RYAN STOP PLEASE! NO MORE! NO!" Logan continued to cry as Ryan straddled his hips and began viciously biting his neck._

Logan stiffened knowing what was coming next. He looked up at Kendall who was watching with dark eyes.

_"RYAN PLEASE! STOP IT!" Ryan was on top of Logan kissing and sucking on his skin. Ryan sunk his teeth into Logan's jaw causing Logan to squirm. He released his death grip on Logan's wrists and moved his hands over Logan's chest and stomach finally resting on Logan's pants. Logan's eyes widened and he gasped when he felt Ryan roughly undo the button and zipper. Logan kicked his legs causing Ryan to fall off of him. He started moving to the door but Ryan grabbed his ankle again and pulled him back. Logan kicked his legs in an attempt to keep Ryan away from him but Ryan managed to flip Logan onto his stomach. Ryan sat on Logan's legs to stop him from kicking and held both of Logan's hands tightly against Logan's back._

"NO!" Kendall, James, and Carlos frantically looked around when they were enveloped in darkness. They couldn't see the memory anymore but they could still hear it. Kendall looked down at Logan to see that he was tightly holding his eyes closed. Kendall grabbed Logan's face and kissed his nose.

"Logan you have to look." Logan shook his head and covered his ears with his hands. All the noise became muffled as Logan continued to shake and cry. Kendall pried Logan's hands away but Logan kept trying to cover his ears. James and Carlos came to Logan's side and grabbed his hands placing them in theirs. They held on tightly stroking his arms reassuringly. Kendall cupped Logan's cheeks and kissed his nose again. "Logan look at me." Logan shook his head.

"N-no."

"Logan please." Logan opened his eyes but everything around them remained dark. "Keep your eyes on me and just listen." Logan nodded his head as more sobs came out.

_"NO! STOP! PLEASE!" Ryan grabbed Logan's hips and in one motion, thrust harshly into Logan._

_"AH! STOP PLEASE! SOMEBODY HELP ME!"_

"Kendall please make it stop." Kendall leaned his forehead against Logan's.

"I'm sorry I can't."

_Logan screamed again as Ryan roughly thrust into him. _

_"STOP PLEASE! NO MORE!" Ryan ignored Logan's pleas and began thrusting rapidly. Logan shut his eyes tightly and clawed at the floor in a futile attempt to get away from Ryan. Ryan's thrusts were becoming erratic and he was thrusting into Logan harder, trying to get deeper. Logan felt even more pain than before and screamed out._

_"SOMEONE PLEASE! KENDALL!"_

A tear ran down Kendall's cheek when he heard Logan call his name. He placed soft kisses to Logan's face as he shut his eyes again and began to struggle.

"I don't want to hear anymore." Kendall rubbed Logan's cheek and kept listening.

"Shh, it's almost over."

_Ryan thrust a few more times before finally releasing his load inside of Logan. He pulled out causing Logan to whimper and stood up._

Logan let out a sob when everything fell silent. Kendall pulled Logan into a hug, James and Carlos joining him. They stayed together when the suddenly heard a beeping noise. The four boys shot up to find themselves in Dr. Trager's office again. They looked around to see that Dr. Trager was sitting back down after turning off the alarm clock. Kendall, James, and Carlos all turned to Logan who was looking around frantically. His breath slowed and he relaxed when he realized where he was. Kendall grabbed Logan's hand. Logan looked up at Kendall as tears started to fall.

"Kendall!" Logan buried himself in Kendall's chest and began to sob. "I'm sorry! Please don't hate me! I didn't want to do it! I didn't like it! I feel so ashamed!" Kendall rocked Logan and whispered to him. Kendall sighed and glanced at everyone in the room. James and Carlos were rubbing Logan's back and Dr. Trager was watching quietly. Kendall, James, and Carlos all sighed and looked at each other relieved. Logan was finally opening up. James and Carlos moved closer to Kendall and Logan joining in on the hug.

**A/N: Well that is the end of this chapter. Man! This chapter was hard to write. There was so much talking in it! lol. I hope you enjoyed this chapter and it is going to be the only one that's all weird like this. **

**Well anyway, there is more to come!**


	12. it's not over yet

After hugging and three boxes of tissues the boys were calmed down enough to be sitting silently on the couch. They watched as Dr. Trager put away the pendulum and alarm clock then walked back over and sat down.

"Logan, you mentioned that you felt ashamed. Is that why you didn't want to talk to your friends?" Logan nodded and wiped his nose with the back of his hand. "Is there anything else your feeling? Why do you think you feel that way?" Logan took in a stuttered breath and played with the hem of his shirt.

"I guess I'm scared. I just don't want Ryan to come back." Logan paused as more tears fell. "I don't want him to hurt my friends." Kendall, James, and Carlos furrowed their eyebrows in confusion. Dr. Trager thought for a moment before responding.

"You're afraid but that fear is because you believe Ryan will hurt your friends rather than yourself." Logan nodded. "Why is that?"

"It's just that… I don't want to lose them. They're important to me and I know them. If Ryan tried to hurt me again they would try and stop him and they would get hurt in the process. I would rather have Ryan beat me then watch him beat them." Logan kept his eyes down not wanting to see his friend's reactions. He knew they would not be happy with that confession. Kendall grabbed Logan's chin forcing him to look up at him. He looked into Logan's eyes for a long while and sighed when he realized Logan was being completely serious.

"Logan, you can't think like that. You can't sacrifice yourself because you think Ryan would do something to me, Carlos, or James. You know as well as I do that Ryan doesn't have the balls to try anything when you're with us. And besides he left the Palm Woods." Logan's eyes widened in shock.

"W-what? When?" James leaned forward so he was in Logan's view.

"Yesterday, after Kendall scared him off." James had a huge grin on his face until Kendall slapped his chest. Kendall turned to James and glared at him with a look that said, _"Why did you tell him that idiot. Now he's gunna be mad at me!"_ When Kendall turned back to Logan he smiled sheepishly. Logan had one eyebrow raised and his eyes narrowed while his lips wear set in a line.

"What did you do?" Kendall laughed awkwardly before turning back to Dr. Trager.

"Why don't we get back on topic? Ryan's not around so you don't have to worry about it Logan." Kendall sighed in relief when Logan's face softened but a second later Logan gave him the "this isn't over face." Dr. Trager cleared her throat to get the boys attention.

"Logan now why don't you tell us why you felt ashamed." Logan swallowed hard.

"Well I just feel… dirty. No matter what I do I still feel his hands on me and I'm disgusted by it. Where ever I go I feel like everyone knows and I don't want anyone to know." Kendall stroked Logan's cheek and wiped away stray tears. Dr. Trager smiled at Logan who looked up at her.

"Logan, you have nothing to be ashamed of. What Ryan did was not your fault and you shouldn't think any less of yourself because of it. You're still the same person you were before and no one is going to think any less of you. You have to remember that even if people know they aren't going to judge you. You did nothing wrong." Logan sighed and wiped away the rest of his tears. He smiled at Dr. Trager and took Kendall's hand. Dr. Trager smiled and looked at her watch. "Well I guess that's the end of this session. Don't be afraid to come back if you ever need anything." The four boys nodded and smiled at Dr. Trager. They each shook her hand before walking out of the office.

* * *

When the boys returned to the apartment Mrs. Knight walked out of the kitchen to greet them. "Hey boys how did it go." Mrs. Knight's smile faltered slightly, she was hoping it had gone well but she didn't believe it. Mrs. Knight looked to Logan expectantly and when he smiled shyly at her she smiled back.

"It was ok… intense, but it defiantly helped." Mrs. Knight looked at each of the boys noticing the blood shot eyes.

"I can see that. How about I make you something." Mrs. Knight looked at the clock and walked into the kitchen. "It's lunch time so I'll make you some sandwiches." The four boys walked over to the kitchen and sat at the table suddenly realizing how hungry they were.

"I don't think I've ever been this hungry in my life!" Carlos rubbed his stomach as he watched Mrs. Knight working. Logan scoffed at Carlos and rolled his eyes.

"You say that every time we eat." Carlos stuck out his tongue at Logan who stuck his tongue out as well. They all shared a laugh but once Mrs. Knight put sandwiches in front of them they all fell silent. When they were halfway through their lunch Mrs. Knight placed a plate of cookies on the table. She placed her hand on Kendall's head and ruffled his hair before walking toward the front door.

"Ok boys I'm going to run some errands before I pick up Katie so make sure you behave." They all said goodbye as Mrs. Knight walked out the door.

"So now that we have the apartment to ourselves what are we going to do?" Kendall said with a sly smile. James and Carlos thought for a moment before they both looked at each other with smirks.

"MONSTER MOVIE NIGHT!" They both shouted while jumping out of their seats. Kendall nodded at his two friends and began to stand.

"Ok then Carlos you go to blockbuster and rent every monster movie you can find. James you go to 7 11 and get some snacks and stuff." Carlos and James both nodded and headed out the door. Kendall turned to Logan with a smirk and kissed his lips softly. "Is there anything you would like to do while we wait?" Logan smiled but his smile immediately faded.

"Yea, why don't you tell me what you did to get Ryan to leave." Kendall's smile faded and he was about to speak when the phone rang.

"Oh look at that why don't you get that." Kendall swiftly walked out of the room. Logan rolled his eyes and walked over to the phone. He picked it up and put it to his ear.

"Hello." Logan was still smiling and looking where Kendall just went.

"_Logan."_ Logan's breath caught in his throat when he registered who the voice belonged to.

"R-Ryan?"

"_Yea listen, I've been thinking about you lately. I can't get you out of my head I want you back."_ Logan took a deep breath trying to keep his cool.

"No Ryan i-it's over. How could you think that I would ever get back with you? You attacked me!" Logan heard a sigh on the other side of the phone.

"_But Logan I love you. I need you. Please take me back."_ Logan sighed heavily.

"No!"

"_You're so cute when you're mad."_ Logan's eyes widened.

"W-what?" Logan looked around but didn't see anyone in the room.

"_I'm watching you Logan."_ Before Logan could say anything the line went dead. Logan didn't move. He stayed silent looking around and listening. Everything seemed quiet but he couldn't help but feel eyes on him. Logan dropped the phone and looked around. He ran over to the door and locked it then ran over to the window behind the couch and shut the shades. Logan ran back to the middle of the room and looked around. He still felt eyes on him. Logan began to hyperventilate as tears came to his eyes.

"KENDALL!"

* * *

Kendall plopped down on his bed and sighed. Today had been intense and lying on his bed felt good. He was about to try and take a quick nap when he heard a muffled voice in the other room. Kendall sat up on his elbows and listened. It was defiantly Logan but he couldn't hear what he was saying. Kendall thought Logan sounded a little distressed but he suddenly heard a low thump and Logan running around. Kendall was getting up when he suddenly heard Logan scream.

"KENDALL!" Kendall's eyes widened at the sound of Logan's voice. He ran out of the room into the living room where Logan was standing there crying. Kendall ran to him and gripped his shoulders.

"Logan what is it?" Logan fisted Kendall's shirt while looking around. His body shook as more sobs came out of him. Logan finally looked up at Kendall with fear in his eyes.

"T-the phone… h-he called." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"Who called?"

"Ryan! H-he said he wanted me b-back and I said no but then he was saying I l-looked cute mad and t-that he was w-watching me!" Kendall's eyes widened and he glanced around. He pulled Logan to his chest and hugged him tightly.

"It's going to be ok Logan. I'll protect you." Kendall continued to hold Logan as he sobbed. Just when things started looking up they had to get worse.

**A/N: ugh this chapter was painful to write. It sucks! Well I hope you don't hate it that much and the story will defiantly be getting better soon I just have to figure out what to do from here. Anyway**

**There is more to come.**


	13. I'm hanging off a cliff

**A/N: ugh! I had a dentist appointment today and my mouth is dyeing! If there are any weird and random mistakes in here I can't blamed for them! Lol **

A week had passed since Ryan's first phone call and things had been getting worse. After he called a second time Logan refused to answer the phone. Ryan still called daily and everyone knew it was him. The phone would ring and when someone other than Logan answered it the line would go dead. To Kendall's relief Logan didn't go back into his shell. He would go to Kendall and tell him how he was feeling which made the situation more bearable.

"It is so hot!" Carlos exclaimed. The four boys were sitting in the apartment trying to keep cool. They were being forced to remain in the apartment because of the recent events and they were not happy about that. James was lying on his stomach on the couch flipping through channels. Kendall was lying on the counter top in the kitchen, the cool surface giving him some relief. Logan was sitting on the opposite side of the couch as James reading like the heat wasn't affecting him. Carlos was sprawled out on the floor. Logan didn't look up at Carlos as he rolled his eyes.

"We know Carlos you've only said that about a thousand times." Carlos groaned and rolled onto his stomach. He shivered as the cool floor made contact with his bare chest.

"Why can't we go to the pool?" Kendall, James, and Logan groaned at Carlos.

"Carlos for the hundredth time we have to stay in the apartment for our safety." Kendall explained. Carlos groaned again and turned his head so his voice wouldn't be muffled.

"But we have body guards for a reason. Why can't they guard our bodies somewhere cool!" Kendall couldn't help the smirk that came to his face. He quickly regained his composure and sat up.

"You and I both know why we have to stay here." Carlos sighed and fell silent. Kendall was right, he knew exactly why. Gustavo had ordered that they remain in the apartment until the trial was over. They still had another week but Carlos was starting to go crazy. He wanted to go outside so bad but Gustavo didn't want to risk any of them getting hurt or as Gustavo put it "One of you dogs dying would hurt the album!" Kelly also added that if they remained in the apartment it would be easier to keep an eye on all four of them. Carlos glanced over to the couch to see that James had fallen asleep and Logan wasn't reading. To better define it, Logan was staring at the book but Carlos could tell he wasn't reading it. Logan kept staring at the same page for about five minutes and Carlos couldn't help but see guilt written on his features. Carlos sat up the movement causing Logan to look up at him.

"Logan, what's up?" Logan put the book down and started playing with the cover.

"It's nothing." Kendall sat up so he could look at Logan.

"Logan you promised me you wouldn't keep anything from Me, James, or Carlos anymore." Logan looked up at Kendall with a shy smile.

"I know, it's nothing bad. It's just… it stinks that you guys are stuck here because of me." Kendall gave Logan a look making Logan sigh. "I know I know. It's not my fault and you guys wouldn't leave me here alone even if you could leave but that doesn't stop me from feeling guilty." Kendall sighed but didn't say anything. Logan had already said what he was going to say. Carlos thought for a moment before standing up suddenly.

"You know what we need! We need to do something fun that will make you feel better!" Carlos leisurely walked over to James and turned facing away from him. "I don't know if you two have noticed," Carlos gestured to James, "But 'the face' is asleep." Kendall and Logan both smirked before standing up.

"So Carlitos, "Kendall started with a smirk, "What did you have in mind?" Carlos ran into his room rummaging through his things. He came back out with a sharpie marker. Kendall and Logan watched Carlos with amusement as he ran through the living room into the bathroom. When Carlos came out he was holding Mrs. Knight's make-up bag. Logan smirked then turned to look at James.

"This is going to be fun." Carlos, Kendall, and Logan knelt in front of them each with a different item in hand. Carlos held the sharpie up and looked to the others.

"Ok remember that artist we talked about in class."

"Frida?" Logan asked. (2)

"Yea. Let's make James look like her." Kendall and Logan both smirked and they went to work. Carlos used the sharpie to give James a unibrow and a beauty mark will Logan used lip gloss on James. Kendall put eyeliner and blush on James will Carlos finished up with the sharpie by giving James a mustache. When they finished they all sat back and admired their work. "I think we're done here boys." Logan smiled before quickly standing up.

"Hold on I have an idea." Kendall and Carlos shared confused looks while they waited for Logan to return. When Logan came back he had a comb (not James' lucky comb) and two hair bands. Carlos and Kendall's eyes widened as they watched Logan pull James' hair into two pig tails.

"Logan James' hair! He'll kill us." Kendall hissed out. Logan turned to Kendall with puppy dog eyes.

"You'll protect me, wont you Kendall." Kendall blushed at the sight of Logan's pouting lip and flirting eyes. He quickly composed himself and pulled Logan into a passionate kiss. When he pulled away Kendall smiled at the look of pure bliss on Logan's face.

"Of course Logan, I will always protect you." Carlos interrupted Logan and Kendall when he noticed James was starting to stir.

"Hurry up and take a picture before he wakes up." Kendall, Logan, and Carlos all whipped out their phones and took a few pictures. Once they put their phones away they stepped back a few feet so they wouldn't look to suspicious. James opened his eyes and stretched. He sat up yawning until he heard small snickering. James opened his eyes watching his friends suspiciously. They were standing in front of him trying to appear innocent while trying not to burst out laughing at the same time.

"What did you do?" James hissed out. He ran to the bathroom and let out a yelp when he saw himself. Logan, Kendall, and Carlos clutched their stomachs and laughed until James peeked out of the bathroom with a death glare. Logan swallowed hard and started to inch backwards. James looked like he was out for blood.

"RUN!" Carlos suddenly yelled. The three boys yelled as James ran at them. Logan ran towards his room, Kendall ran for the kitchen and Carlos ran for the swirly slide.

"I'm going to get you!" James ran after Logan considering he should be the easiest to catch. Logan ran into his room laughing. He wasn't worried about James catching him; he would probably just tickle him then leave him alone. Logan jumped on his bed to avoid James. He ran back out of his room into the living room where he found Kendall and Carlos at the top of the slide watching with amusement.

"Kendall! You said you would protect me!" Kendall laughed and slid down the slide.

"Coming babe!" Before Kendall got to the bottom of the slide James caught Logan and started tickling him. Logan squeaked and fell to the floor hopelessly swatting James' hands away.

"Stop James!" Logan squeaked again and giggled. He hated how ticklish he was and how he squealed like a girl.

"Don't think so!" James laughed out. Before James knew what hit him he was tackled to the floor by Kendall who started tickling him. James squealed under Kendall.

"James did you forget, your ticklish too!" After a good ten minutes of wrestling James finally moved to the bathroom to wash his face. Logan, Carlos and Kendall sat on the couch catching their breath. Carlos stood up and stretched before walking toward his room.

"I'm gunna take a nap." Kendall and Logan groaned in acknowledgment before they stood up as well.

"I'm going to take a shower. I'm all sweaty and gross." Logan stated with a slight grimace. Kendall kissed Logan's lips before walking towards his and Logan's room.

"While you do that I'm going to follow in Carlos' example. I could really use a good nap." Logan smiled and walked toward the kitchen bathroom.

* * *

Logan got dressed in the bathroom and walked out. He heard someone coming through the front door so he went into the living room to greet them.

"Mrs. Knight your back already…" Logan stopped in his tracks when he realized who was standing at the door. "R-Ryan what are you…" Logan's eyes widened and his breath caught in his throat when he realized Ryan was holding a gun. Ryan walked a few steps forward and helped up the gun so it was pointed straight at Logan.

"Hey babe, it's been a while."

**A/N: DUN DUN DUN! Lol anyway I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I think it turned out better then the last one anyway. I wasn't having as much trouble trying to think of things to write. Well anyway it's time for some bad news. I'm starting college tomorrow so that means less updates less often. I might be able to get another chapter up soon because I'm just moving in tomorrow I'm not starting classes yet but I'm just warning you now so bare with me. **

**There's more to come!**

**(1): I forgot about 1 in one of the previous chapters lol. if you forgot it was the memory analysis and i don't know if that sounds smart or scientific but i used to so i hope it works lol**

**(2): Frida is an artist. Look her up she has a mustache and unibrow its funny lol**


	14. forever

**A/N: chapter 14 here we go!**

Logan didn't move, he didn't say anything, and for a short moment all his functions stopped. He forgot for a moment where he was, who he was, and what was happening but after that brief moment it all came flooding back.

"Ryan… p-please don't do this." Ryan didn't drop his hand as he took another step.

"Don't do what? Take back what is mine. You're my boyfriend Logan. Mine! You got that? And nobody is going to stand in my way." Logan's breath hitched and he took a step back. Logan turned when he heard a door opening. Carlos and James walked out of their room without a care in the world. Carlos was stretching his muscles while James was drying his wet hair. They stopped when they spotted Logan. They weren't fully out of the hall yet so they couldn't see Ryan but they knew from Logan's fearful expression that something was up. Logan tried to give them a look telling them to run but it obviously didn't work. James and Carlos stepped into the living room.

"Logan what's going…" James trailed off when he spotted Ryan. He dropped his towel and looked between Ryan and Logan noticing where the gun was pointed. Both James and Carlos went to step over to Logan but Ryan turned his attention to them.

"Move and I'll shoot him!" James and Carlos froze in place. They eyed Logan worriedly but they're gaze moved next to them when Kendall came running out of his room. He stopped next to James and peered around him. Kendall's breath caught in his throat when he realized what was going on.

"Ryan what the hell are you doing? How did you get in here?" Kendall hissed out. Ryan laughed quietly at Kendall's tone. He walked over to Kendall and stood in his face.

"It was a lot easier then you think." Ryan swung his free hand so it hit Kendall in the face. Kendall fell back and glared up at Ryan. James and Carlos flinched but because Ryan was still pointing the gun at Logan they knew they couldn't do anything. They just stood clenching their fists while Ryan hit Kendall. Ryan kicked Kendall causing him to groan. "You're not so tough now are you Kendall!" Ryan kicked him again then placed his foot on the top of his head pressing down. Kendall cringed as Ryan added more pressure to his head. "You know you really think your hot shit don't you Kendall? You think that I'm going to be intimidated by you. Well, who's intimidated now?" Ryan pointed the gun at James and Carlos who went rigid. "Those two are afraid of me…" Ryan pointed the gun down at Kendall, "You're afraid of me…" Ryan pointed the gun back at Logan who whimpered, "And he's afraid of me." Ryan pressed down on Kendall's head harshly causing him to cry out slightly. Logan couldn't take watching this. He shook and tears came to his eyes as Ryan physically abused the one person he loved more than anything.

"Ryan stop!" Ryan turned to Logan with a smirk. "Leave him alone… please." Ryan removed His foot from Kendall and kicked him once more. Kendall groaned and clutched his stomach still managing to glare up at Ryan. When Ryan moved away from Kendall James and Carlos knelt down beside him helping him sit up. Logan swallowed hard as Ryan approached him. He kept his eyes on Ryan's but every now and then he would either glance at his friends behind Ryan or glance down at Ryan's gun. Ryan stopped when he was right in front of Logan. Logan couldn't look away as Ryan lifted the gun up so it was lightly touching his face. Logan shut his eyes tightly shaking as Ryan moved the barrel of the gun lightly over Logan's skin. Ryan moved the gun down Logan's neck then skipped over his chest and pushed it into Logan near the hem of his shirt.

"I've missed you so much Logan. I want to feel you again." Ryan began to lift up Logan's shirt with the gun. Logan cringed and began silently sobbing as Ryan began touching him. "How about we have more fun this time," Ryan leaned toward Logan's ears whispering to him, "This time your friends can watch." Logan's eyes widened as an endless stream of tears began to fall.

"No! Please… no!" Logan continued to beg in sobs as Ryan continued lifting his shirt. Logan opened his eyes seeing his friends watch with anger and pain. They wanted to stop this. They wanted to save Logan but they couldn't, just like last time. Ryan pulled away from Logan stepping back slightly.

"Let's go over some rules of our little game. No one moves, no one speaks," Ryan turned to Logan and grabbed his chin, "except for you Logan, you can scream and cry all you want." Logan shut his eyes and pulled away from Ryan. "No one does anything and no one gets shot." Ryan was about to make his move on Logan when the front door suddenly opened. All the boys eyes widened to see Katie walking in.

"Kendall are you home…" Katie stopped when she realized what was going on. She let out a scream as Ryan lifted the gun so it was pointed at her.

"KATIE!" Kendall screamed as he fought to stand up. Ryan smirked as he readied himself to pull the trigger.

"Looks like someone broke the rules." Logan used this opportunity to lunge at Ryan. He grabbed the arm that was holding the gun so it was no longer facing Katie. Ryan and Logan struggled each one of them trying to get a hold of the gun. Logan could hear voices around him, one being Kendall telling Katie to run. Logan was losing his grip on Ryan when James, Kendall, and Carlos came running over. When Logan was pushed away by Ryan he stumbled back but didn't fall over. Kendall, James and Carlos tackled Ryan but were unable to stop him from firing a single shot. James ripped the gun from Ryan's hand and threw it across the room. Carlos pinned him down and used a scarf that was lying around to tie Ryan's hands. Once they were done they looked up and saw Kendall looking towards Logan with wide eyes. To their horror Logan was clutching his stomach, his shirt quickly becoming soaked with blood. Logan fell to his knees then fell over onto his side and rolled onto his back. He screamed out in pain as agony flooded over him. Kendall scrambled to his feet and ran towards Logan.

"LOGAN!" Logan could here Kendall screaming his name and telling Carlos to call 911. His vision began to blur as everything faded to black. "Logan stay with me! Please Logan don't die! LOGAN!"

_The young boy shot up out of bed and ran towards his parent's room. He laughed and giggled as he entered the room. Today was his very first day of school and he couldn't wait. After three failed attempts at jumping onto the bed Logan finally managed to climb on. He stood up and began jumping up and down laughing trying to wake his mother up. Logan's father had already gone to work so his mother was the only one home with him. _

"_Momma! Momma! Wake up I get to go to school today!" Logan plopped down so he was on his hands and knees peering down at his mother. She groaned and sat up in bed glaring down at Logan._

"_Logan! What did momma tell you about waking… waking her up… her up in the mornings!" Logan looked at his mother sadly then crawled out of bed. _

"_I'm sorry momma but you promised you would take me to school today." Logan's mother stumbled out of bed picking up a large bottle and chugging the contents. _

"_Come on Logan! Don't be such a whiney bitch! Walk to school!" Logan's eyes widened at his mother's words._

"_But momma I don't know how to get to school. And Mrs. Johnson says six year olds like me shouldn't walk around alone." Logan smiled brightly convinced that he was able to convince his mom. Mrs. Johnson was a smart lady so his mom would have to listen. Logan's mother just pushed Logan harshly out of the room and into the hallway. _

"_Stop bitching and go to school!" She slammed the door and went back to bed. Logan stood in front of the door for a long time waiting for his mother to come back out. He reached up for the door handle but he found that it was locked._

"_Momma!" Logan was met with silence. He stood there for another moment before turning around lip quivering. "Momma you promised." Logan grabbed his back that his father had put together for him and the lunch that his father had made. He walked out the door and after considering for a moment he took a left and started walking down the street. After walking for a good 15 minutes Logan was completely lost. He had no idea where his kindergarten was to begin with and now that he was completely lost he was terrified. Logan sat down on the curve of a random street and began crying. He covered his eyes with the back of his hands and sobbed loudly. Logan continued to cry until he heard someone walking up behind him. He turned around to see a boy his age with blonde hair staring down at him. Logan watched the boy walk over to him and sit down next to him._

"_Hi, what's your name?" Logan wiped his eyes and looked at the boy._

"_L-Logan." Logan replied through his sobs. The blonde boy furrowed his eyebrows at Logan looking him up and down._

"_I'm Kendall. Why are you crying Logan? Do you have a boo boo. I cry when I get boo boos too." Logan shook his head as he continued to cry._

"_No, I'm lost. I was trying to find my school but I couldn't and now I don't know where I am." Kendall rubbed Logan's back as he continued to cry._

"_What school are you going to?" _

"_Garden leaf." Kendall's eyes brightened and a smile came to his face._

"_I'm going there too!" Logan looked up at Kendall who was now standing._

"_R-really?" Kendall nodded his head in confirmation making Logan smile slightly._

"_My mommy can take you to school so you don't have to worry about being lost anymore." Logan's eyes brightened as he wiped away the rest of his tears. Just then Mrs. Knight walked out of the house walking over to the two boys._

"_Kendall who is this?" Mrs. Knight asked concerned._

"_This is Logan. He got lost trying to find the school. He's going to Garden leaf too mommy. Can you drive him so he's not lost anymore?" Mrs. Knight furrowed her eyebrows and knelt down in front of Logan. _

"_Sweetheart wears your mommy?" Logan looked down at his shoes sniffing slightly._

"_She got mad at me cause I woke her up and she said that I should walk to school even though she promised she would take me." Mrs. Knight looked at Logan sadly before standing up._

"_I'll take you too school Logan then they can call your parents to tell them you're ok." Logan nodded before following Kendall._

"_So Logan do you want to be friends?" Logan smiled brightly and nodded._

"_Can we be best friends?" Kendall's eyes brightened _

"_YEA!"_

Logan's eyes slowly opened when he realized he was being lifted. He could feel someone tug at his eye and shine a light in it. Logan instantly knew what was happening. He was being taken to the hospital. Logan's eyes drifted shut but opened again when he felt a hand gripping his.

"Logan can you hear me it's Kendall! Please Logan stay with me! Please!" Logan tried to stay awake but he found his eyes drifting shut again. "No Logan wake up please! LOGAN!" 

_Carlos don't eat that you don't know where it's been!" Logan chased Carlos around the playground trying to get the piece of chewed gum he found out of his mouth. Logan had almost caught Carlos when he ran into someone. "I'm sorry…" He started to say but he stopped when he realized who he had bumped into. It was the school bully Steven. Logan frowned and stood up. He went to walk away but Steven pushed him back._

"_Hey loser, give me your lunch." Logan didn't want any trouble. Steven was a big and tough fourth grader. Logan was about to hand over his lunch when he heard a voice behind him._

"_Leave him alone Steve." Logan turned around to see Kendall standing behind him with James and Carlos. Steven may have been older than them but he knew that four against one just wasn't good odds so he immediately backed off. Logan turned to his friends smiling. _

"_Thanks guys." They smiled back at Logan and grabbed his wrists._

"_Come on Logan lets go play!" Carlos yelled. Carlos and James ran over to the swing set and climbed into a seat. Kendall and Logan sat on the grass waiting for a turn. Logan smiled and looked at Kendall._

"_I'm gunna miss this." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows staring at Logan questioningly. _

"_What do you mean Logie?"_

"_Well after this year were going to be fourth graders. That means were going to the middle school." Logan looked at Kendall sadly. "Are we still gunna be best friends next year?" Kendall moved closer to Logan and threw his arm around him. Logan looked at him expectantly while Kendall just smiled at him._

"_Of course Logie, we're gunna be together forever and ever!" Logan brightened at Kendall's words._

"_Really? Forever?"_

"_Forever…"_

**A/N: it took some doing but I finally got this chapter done. I thought I would have been done sooner but I felt so weird writing around my roommate. I felt like she was watching me so I only wrote when she wasn't in the room or when she was asleep lol. But anyway I hope you enjoyed it **

**And there is more to come.**


	15. pray when there is nothing left

For hours Kendall, James, and Carlos had been sitting in hell on earth, the hospital waiting room. As soon as they reached the hospital Logan was rushed into surgery. The three boys had no idea on their friend's condition, or if he was even alive anymore but as they sat there each one of them couldn't help but think that they had just lost a loved one. Kendall sat silently staring at the floor. He felt numb. He didn't register anything that was going on around him. Someone could come in right now guns blazing and he probably wouldn't notice. Kendall barely noticed when Carlos started sniffing and whimpering. He barely noticed when James pulled Carlos into a hug as Carlos cried. Kendall felt so alone he didn't even notice when his mother came running in.

"Kendall! Are you ok? James, Carlos are you ok?" Mrs. Knight blurted out. The three boys nodded their heads. "What about Logan?" The boys stayed quiet keeping their eyes on the floor. Carlos was the first to look up at Mrs. Knight with sad eyes.

"We don't know." Carlos buried his face in his hands as he began to cry. James pulled Carlos tightly to him as Mrs. Knight watched them sadly. She glanced down at Kendall who hadn't said a word. She slowly sat in the seat next to him while Katie watched from a few feet away.

"Kendall are you ok." Kendall shook his head. There was no point in saying he was ok because he was far from it. Kendall looked too his mother, his expression lacking any emotion.

"I can't lose him mom. He's my everything." Mrs. Knight rubbed Kendall's back as he continued to stare into space blankly. Kendall had been the only one who hadn't cried once. Carlos was crying currently and James had cried on the ride over but for some reason Kendall didn't cry. After another 2 hours a doctor walked through the double doors. When Kendall saw him he stood up. He didn't have to wait for the doctor to call Logan's name, he recognized him. When the doctor reached them he sighed heavily.

"Hello my name is doctor Wells. Normally I would say it's nice to meet you but it seems that we know each other far too well." Everyone nodded in understanding that the doctor hated every time Logan came in just as much as they did. "Well Logan is out of surgery but I can't say he is out of the woods yet. We were able to stop the internal bleeding but he lost a lot of blood. Also, he has a fever and we don't know when it will go down." Carlos stood up suddenly.

"Is he gunna make it?" The doctor sighed causing tears to come to Carlos' eyes.

"I'm going to be honest with you, I don't know. He is in critical condition meaning that he could die at any time." Dr. Wells looked at his chart. "There is a chance he could get an infection because of the fever and blood loss. The good thing is he isn't in a coma but we did give him something to make him sleep. If he had stayed awake the pain would have caused him to pass out anyway." The doctor sighed as he closed his chart. "Logan was also having some trouble breathing because the bullet damaged his diaphragm." Everyone stayed silent taking in all the doctor said. None of them wanted to think it but Logan was knocking on deaths door, they could lose him.

"Can we see him?" Kendall blurted out. When the doctor sighed and shook his head Kendall's breath hitched.

"I'm afraid you'll have to wait till tomorrow. He is in isolation at the current moment because he was just taken out of surgery (1). Even though they wanted to, the four boys didn't argue. They didn't want to risk Logan getting an infection. They would rather wait a little to see him so when he got better they could see him for the rest of their lives. If they went now they would see him sooner but they ran the risk of going the rest of their lives never seeing him again. They said goodbye to the doctor before climbing in Mrs. Knight's car and silently driving back to the palm woods. When they returned they kept their heads down but they could still feel the pity that everyone was giving them. When they walked into the apartment each of them went into their rooms planning on going to bed early. James and Carlos fell to sleep quickly but Kendall laid on his bed awake for a long time. He glanced over to Logan's bed feeling dread because of how empty it was. Kendall felt even more dread when the thought crossed that Logan's bed may stay empty. Kendall climbed out of his bed and laid gently on Logan's. He glanced at the nightstand seeing the stuffed animal he gave Logan was sitting there.

"It works for Logan maybe it could work for me." Kendall grabbed the stuffed dog and cuddled into it. He breathed in smiling slightly when he smelled Logan. Logan always had a fresh sent. Kendall couldn't help but think of a lovely forest or rolling hills whenever he smelled Logan. Logan was so peaceful and beautiful that it made sense that his smell would bring images of beauty. With this small comfort Kendall was able to drift off to sleep.

Kendall awoke at exactly 7:00am like his body knew where he wanted to be. The hospitals visiting hours started at 7 so Kendall jumped out of bed and quickly got ready. When he reached the kitchen his mother had already made breakfast and everyone in the apartment was rushing out of their rooms. They all sat down at the table staying silent. They were too focused on getting to their destination quicker to slow down their eating by talking. Once everyone was done Mrs. Knight washed the dishes and ushered everyone out of the apartment. During the car ride Kendall's leg had been shaking uncontrollably. What if something happened to Logan? Kendall told himself numerous times that if Logan got worse or died the hospital would have called him. Kendall flinched when he felt a hand on his shoulder. James looked at him while squeezing his hand slightly. James didn't need to say anything because Kendall already knew James was trying to get him to relax. He breathed in deeply and stopped his leg from shaking. When they reached the hospital they all filed out of the car and ran in. Mrs. Knight walked over to the front desk and smiled at the nurse stationed there.

"Hi, we're here for Logan Mitchell." The nurse searched the name on the computer and to Kendall's relief she smiled up at them.

"He is in room 145. It's down this hall and at the end of the hall on the left." Mrs. Knight nodded and started walking in the direction the nurse pointed to. The relief Kendall had previously felt disappeared when he spotted the nurse's smile fade as she watched them walk down the hall sadly. Kendall quickened his pace making him the first one to reach Logan's room. He breathed in and opened the door quietly looking in. The sight of Logan on the bed broke his heart. Kendall walked over to Logan and sat in a chair near Logan's head. James and Carlos sat on the other side of Logan's bed while Mrs. Knight and Katie stood by Kendall. Everyone looked Logan up and down not feeling reassured by his appearance. His breathing seemed forced and he was slightly pale but with a red tint to his skin. His expression gave off that he was in a lot of pain even though he was asleep. Kendall reached up and tentatively laced his fingers with Logan's. He could feel the heat radiating off of Logan's body but he didn't pull away. Even when his hand started sweating and he started feeling uncomfortable he didn't pull away. No one said anything as they silently watched Logan. It would look like they had all already given up but there was still a feeling of hope floating through the room. The previous thoughts of death and suffering turned to thoughts of hope.

"You can make it Logan. You have to make it there isn't an us without you." Carlos thought.

"Come on Logan you have to pull through. I know you can. Do it for Kendall Logan, he needs you." James thought.

"I can't lose one of my older brothers. You have to make it Logan." Katie thought.

"I never realized how much of a son you are to me. I don't know if James, Carlos, or Kendall could live without you and frankly, I don't know if I can either." Mrs. Knight thought. Everyone remained silent but it was broken by a few grumbling stomachs. Carlos and James blushed and looked at each other. Mrs. Knight smiled slightly and walked towards the door.

"Why don't we go to the cafeteria and get lunch." Everyone nodded and moved to the door except Kendall.

"I'm not hungry so I'm going to stay here. No one argued knowing that Kendall needed a moment alone with Logan. Once they all left Kendall moved his chair closer to Logan.

"Logan I don't know if you can hear me but just know I love you. You have to pull through this; I can't live without you Logan." Kendall held Logan's hand between both his hands stroking Logan's hand with his thumb. "If something were to happen to you I don't know what I'd do, but I just want you to know that when you wake up I'll be here waiting for you." Kendall sighed and glanced down at his hands. He didn't know what else he could do. He felt so helpless, he couldn't save Logan from Ryan and he couldn't save Logan now. In desperation Kendall moved closer to the bed and clasped his hands together tightly. He held his hands so tightly they shook. Kendall buried his face in Logan's bed closing his eyes.

"I know I'm not the type of person who does this but I need your help more than ever. Please, please don't let Logan die. I need him, I love him. Please let him get better, I'll do anything."

"Amen."

**A/N: and that's the end of this chapter. i hope you enjoyed it and there is more to come.**

**(1): I was in the hospital with an infection and was put in like an isolation room. It wasn't to the point where people couldn't see me but that's how I got the idea. **


	16. scary similarities

A few days had passed and to everyone's relief Logan was getting better. His fever had gone down and he was able to breathe normally. There was also no longer a fear of Logan getting an infection. The only thing that everyone was waiting for now was for Logan to wake up. Dr. Wells said he should be waking up within the next few days and even as soon as today.

Kendall was sitting in Logan's hospital room watching Logan sleep. He looked peaceful but Kendall could still tell he was in some pain. Mrs. Knight and Katie had visited earlier but they were only able to stay for an hour. James and Carlos were getting something to eat. The three boys had decided that someone should always be in the room with Logan. James and Carlos always let Kendall stay in there by himself so he could have alone time with Logan. After sitting quietly for a few minutes Kendall couldn't ignore the feeling of hunger he was starting to get. He held a hand to his stomach as the hunger was starting to get uncomfortable. He looked toward the door wondering where James and Carlos where.

"Where are they? I'm starving." Just then James walked through the door with Carlos following behind him. Kendall sighed and stood up. "What took you so long I'm starving over here!" James rolled his eyes and pointed to Carlos.

"Blame him. I never should have agreed to go to the buffet on the second floor." Kendall watched Carlos as he sat down in a chair rubbing his slightly bulging stomach. Carlos sighed and let out a burp, which made Kendall and James snicker.

"That was some good food." Carlos said as he patted his stomach. Kendall rolled his eyes at his friend and walked out. He headed down the hall to the cafeteria that was on the same floor as Logan's room. When he walked in there was almost no one in there. Just a few elderly couples and mothers with young children. Kendall walked over to the counter and picked up a turkey sandwich, an apple, a bag of chips, and a soda. He found a seat towards the back of the cafeteria by a big window and sat down. The first bite of his sandwich brought his stomach instant relief. He continued eating while looking out the window. He couldn't help but smile when he saw how peaceful the scenery was. The back of the hospital had small paths that led through gardens and trees. Kendall immediately had the idea of taking Logan out there once he woke up. Kendall sighed when he thought of Logan. Even though he had been with Logan everyday he still felt lonely. He missed talking to Logan, cuddling with him and kissing him. The thought that Kendall had almost lost Logan made him shiver. He was so glad that Ryan was locked up right now without the possibility of bail. They still had a few more days until the trail and a few more days before Ryan was locked up for good. When Kendall thought of the trial he couldn't help but wonder if Logan was ready for it. He would be awake by then but would he be healthy enough? More importantly would he be emotionally ready for it.

"Excuse me, are you feeling alright?" Kendall jumped when he realized someone was standing in front of him. He had been so deep in thought he hadn't realized that he had finished eating and was just sitting their staring into space. When he looked up there was a young woman with brown curly hair looking down at him. She defiantly wasn't a nurse here and Kendall soon noticed she had a very young boy clinging to her leg.

"I'm fine, why do you ask?" Kendall blurted out.

"Well you've been sitting here for about two hours now and I couldn't help but ask. I'm sorry if I'm bothering you." Kendall was surprised. He didn't realizing he had been spacing out that long. He looked down at the table and took in a breath.

"No you're not bothering me." Kendall ran his hand through his hair. "Wow two hours. I didn't realize I was here that long." The woman sat down across from Kendall pulling her son into her lap.

"You must have really been deep in thought to be spaced out for that long. If you don't mind me asking, does it have to do with why you're here?" Kendall nodded looking down at the table.

"It's a long story." The mother made herself more comfortable.

"I have time if you need someone to listen." Kendall smiled slightly and leaned forward. He couldn't believe what he was doing. He spent nearly 20 minutes telling this woman, a total stranger everything, everything about Ryan, about Logan getting hurt and about Logan getting shot. When he finished she was staring at him wide eyed.

"Wow, it's so horrible for someone so young to go through so much. I hope your boyfriend is getting better." Kendall nodded and smiled

"He is." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows at the woman with a sudden thought. "If you don't mind me asking, why are you here?" The woman sighed looking down at her son.

"I guess you can say it was fate that we found ourselves talking to each other. My husband was shot too." Kendall widened his eyes at the woman. "My husband is a police officer. He stopped someone for running a red light when they pulled out a gun and shot him." Kendall sat back taking it in.

"Oh wow. Is he going to be ok?" The woman smiled and nodded.

"He'll be fine. The bullet only hit his arm. We're just waiting for him to be patched up so we can go home." Kendall smiled at the woman happy that her husband would be ok.

"Knowing their ok doesn't take all the pain away though." The woman nodded in agreement. "The thought that I almost lost him scares me and I feel guilty because I didn't protect him… like I promised." The woman patted Kendall's hand.

"I know how you feel. When I got that call that Logan was shot I didn't know what to think." Kendall coughed slightly and stared at her wide eyed.

"Your husband's name is Logan!" She nodded while looking at Kendall confused. Kendall pointed to himself still wide eyed.

"My boyfriends name is Logan." She mirrored his amazement.

"Wow, I guess we're more alike than we thought." Kendall nodded as the woman stood up. "Well it was nice meeting you." Kendall stood up as well and shook her hand.

"It was nice meeting you too." She started leading her son away but stopped and looked back. "Wait, what's your name." She smiled at him.

"My name is Kendall. I hope your friend gets better." Kendall stood shocked as she watched her leave. He always knew that there were girls named Kendall too but whenever he thought about meeting a girl named Kendall he didn't think it would be this freaky. Kendall smiled and started walking back to Logan's room. When he got halfway down the hall he slowed when he saw Carlos running towards him. His heart started to beat rapidly when he started to think that something bad had happened. Carlos finally reached Kendall and grabbed his wrist pulling him quickly.

"Come on Kendall hurry up!" Kendall was freaking out to much to notice the excitement rather than fear in Carlos' voice. When they reached the room Kendall walked in scared as hell. When he realized what was really going on all fear went out the window. Carlos and James were standing on one side of Logan watching Kendall with smirks. Logan was sitting up in bed smiling at Kendall. He was awake.

"Hey Kendall." Kendall let out a breath and smiled at Logan. Even though Logan was sitting in a hospital bed he never looked more amazing. He had color in his face and he looked happy to see Kendall. As Kendall continued to stand by the door watching Logan's beautiful face he couldn't help but be reminded that he almost lost him. He was so close to never seeing Logan again, never hearing him, never touching him, never laughing with him, and never being happy with him. Logan almost died. Tears started to well in Kendall's eyes as all the fear, sadness, and pain that he had been feeling finally came out. It took seeing Logan's happy face to truly realize what he almost lost. Kendall walked over to Logan and gently hugged him. He buried his face in Logan's shoulder crying silently. Logan was surprised at first but quickly wrapped his arms around Kendall tightly. It was obvious that he had been keeping his emotions inside until this moment. James and Carlos watched quietly happy that Kendall had Logan again. Kendall pulled away and cupped Logan's face. He sniffed slightly and stared at him.

"I almost lost you." Logan rubbed Kendall's arm trying to comfort him.

"It's ok Kendall. I'm still here, I'm alive." Kendall leaned his forehead against Logan's shoulder again.

"Thank god." Kendall whispered. Logan smiled and pulled Kendall into a kiss. It was soft and slow letting both of them know how they felt about each other. Kendall quickly took control of the kiss and moved his lips against Logan's. When he pulled away he smiled at the surprised look on Logan's face.

"That was amazing." Logan breathed out. Logan sighed and sat back in the bed. When Logan heard quiet laughing next to him he looked over and blushed. James and Carlos were trying to let Kendall and Logan have their moment but they were obviously failing.

"You're such a girl Logan." Carlos laughed out. James and Carlos busted out laughing at the shocked look on Logan's face.

"I am not!" Logan squeaked out." James and Carlos continued to laugh.

"Dude you did the sigh. Girls do that after I kiss them." James laughed out. Logan pouted at James and laid back in bed. He was still blushing. When he looked over to Kendall his pout grew when he realized Kendall was trying not to laugh. Without thinking Logan angrily crossed his arms over his chest but he pulled his arms away whimpering in pain. Tears came to Logan's eyes and he whimpered again as the pulsing pain continued.

"Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow!" James and Carlos were at Logan's side in a heartbeat. Kendall gripped Logan's hands as he continued to whimper.

"Logan are you ok?" he shook his head as he continued to feel more pain.

"Oh God I shouldn't have done that. It hurts so bad." Kendall quickly pressed the call button and within a few seconds a nurse walked in. Logan was whimpering and had his hands over his eyes as tears fell. The nurse walked over to the side of the bed and touched Logan's arm.

"Are you in a lot of pain?" Logan nodded his head rapidly. Kendall turned to the nurse to explain what happened.

"He crossed his arms and I think he hit his stitches." The nurse nodded and put on some gloves.

"Lay back. I need to make sure the stitches didn't re-open." Logan nodded and slide back more still covering his eyes with his hands. The nurse pulled up the gown (he had underwear on don't worry) until the bandage over his stitches were visible. There wasn't any blood, which was a good sign. She pulled back the bandage and ran her fingers over the stitches softly. Logan whimpered and tensed at the touch. "Everything looks fine. The area is just really sensitive. You're going to have to be more careful." Logan nodded as she pulled the gown back down. "I'll give you some pain killers. You should feel it working in a short while and it's going to make you sleepy." Logan nodded and pulled his hands down. He watched as the nurse fiddled with the bag hanging next to Logan's bed. After a few moments Logan began to relax as the pain started to go away. The nurse smiled at Logan and left the room. Kendall brought his hand to Logan's face and wiped away the tears.

"Are you ok now?" Logan nodded slowly. The pain killer was making him sleepy. He shifted in the bed making himself more comfortable and closed his eyes. James and Carlos moved away from Logan and sat in some chairs by the bed. Kendall went to move away as well but Logan grabbed his hand.

"No, stay." Logan said sleepily. Kendall laughed quietly as Logan moved over making room for Kendall. When Kendall laid down Logan snuggled up next to him making sure not to disturb his stitches. Kendall stroked Logan's hair as he drifted off to sleep.

"I love you Logan."

"I lovel you too Ken…doll." Kendall smirked, Logan sounded drunk when he was almost asleep. Within seconds Logan was snoring quietly and when Kendall glanced over James and Carlos were doing the same. Kendall sighed and closed his eyes. He drifted off to sleep happy Logan was in his arms.

**A/N: YEY! Logan's awake. I hoped you enjoyed this chapter. I start classes' tomorrow so idk if I'll be able to update as quickly. If I know I won't be able to update for a long time I'll probably tell you. So, if the next update is an authors not that's a bad thing =[**

**Anyway, there is more to come. **


	17. she's cold hearted

**A/N: YEA! No author's note! Well... this technique is an author's note right here but chapter 17 is below so it's all good! **

Mrs. Knight walked through the hospital hallways dragging Katie along with her. She was here to visit Logan who was doing well in the hospital but she was also here to yell at Kendall, James, and Carlos for never calling her.

"Those boys stay out all night and never even bother calling me." Mrs. Knight knew it was obvious were they were but that didn't make it ok for her 16 year old son not to call her. When she reached the room and opened the door she had to hold in an "aw" noise. Kendall was lying in Logan's hospital bed with Logan curled up into his side. She thought they looked just adorable together and she couldn't help but forget that she was angry at Kendall. When she glanced over at James and Carlos she couldn't help but laugh. James was sitting with half his butt off the chair and his legs spread wide open. Mrs. Knight wouldn't have been surprised if he fell out of the chair. Carlos had obviously already fallen out of his chair because he was lying on the floor with his legs and arms spread out like the Vitruvian Man. His mouth was also gapping as loud snoring came out of him.

"Mom can I wake them up?" Mrs. Knight looked at Katie weirdly but nodded. She watched as she slowly walked over to Carlos and stood above him. Katie grabbed James' hand and stuck his fingers in Carlos' mouth. The chairs were so low and James slid down so much his hand was able to reach. Carlos, who was still wrapped in whatever dream he was having started sucking and licking James fingers.

"That taste gooood…." Carlos said in his sleep. Katie was standing by the side covering her mouth so she wouldn't wake them up to soon. James sifted in his seat slightly and let out a moan. Katie's eyes widened and she laughed out loud not able to hold it in.

"That tickles." James giggled. Kendall's eyes fluttered open at the sudden noise in the room. He glanced up to see that Logan was waking up too. They both looked around confused until they spotted Katie laughing in the corner. They looked down to see Carlos sucking on James' fingers. James let out another moan making Logan and Kendall looked at each other and started laughing. James and Carlos seemed to wake up at the same time. It took each of them a few seconds to register what was going on but the looks on their faces when they glanced at each other was priceless. James looked at his hand and Carlos crossed his eyes to look down at his mouth. After another moment they both let out a shriek.

"CARLOS! WHAT THE HELL!" James yelled as he wiped his hands on his pants.

"YOU'RE THE ONE WHO STUCK YOUR DIRTY FINGERS IN MY MOUTH!" Carlos shrieked as he rinsed his mouth out with water. Everyone one in the room (except James and Carlos) were dying of laughter. It didn't take James or Carlos long to figure out what had actually happened. They both looked at each other then smirked evilly at Katie.

"What's with the look?" Katie said backing away.

"TICKLE HER!" They both yelled. Katie shrieked and ran out of the room with Carlos and James going after her. Mrs. Knight shook her head and walked over to the bed and sat down. Kendall had climbed out of the bed by now and was sitting on the opposite side of the bed.

"How are you feeling Logan?" Mrs. Knight asked. Logan smiled at Mrs. Knight.

"I feel good. I'm not really in any pain. Only when I move around." Mrs. Knight patted Logan's hand and was going to say something more when Katie walked back in. She sat down next to her mom with a big smirk on her face. They all looked at her confused until James and Carlos ran back in huffing and puffing.

"What happened to you two?" Kendall questioned.

"We were chasing Katie when I ran into some old lady." Carlos breathed out.

"She started hitting him with her cane so I went to reason with her but then her dog started chasing us!" Everyone's eyes widened but Katie seemed to know something they didn't.

"Wow, what kind of dog was it?" James and Carlos looked at each other then blushed.

"A uh…. pomeranian." Everyone started laughing loudly.

"You were scared of a rat dog! Those things are like completely harmless." James stood up straight abruptly and pointed at Kendall.

"Hey! Those things are more vicious then you think!" Everyone continued laughing until Mrs. Knight heard her cell phone ringing. She quickly excused herself then walked into the hallway. When they all sobered up they sat quietly suddenly aware that Mrs. Knight was yelling at who ever she was talking to. They all watched the door confused and a little worried. When Mrs. Knight walked back into the room she had an annoyed and worried look on her face.

"Logan… there's something you should know." Logan's breath caught in his throat. If Ryan was out again he didn't know what he would do.

"Don't tell me he got out somehow." Mrs. Knight shook her head causing everyone to sigh in relief. Logan looked confused at Mrs. Knight. "Then what is it." Mrs. Knight sat down on the bed by Logan's feet.

"Logan did Ryan ever tell you anything about his family." Logan shook his head." Did you know his last name?"

"Yea it was Chester." No one seemed to understand what Mrs. Knight was getting at except for Katie. She jumped up from her chair and stared at Logan.

"Ryan's last name is Chester! As in Ryan Edward Chester, the son of the extremely rich Edward Chester!" Everyone looked at Katie wide eyed.

"Katie what are you talking about?" Kendall said. Katie huffed and rolled her eyes.

"The Chester family founded the Chester boarding School of the Arts. One of the world's most prestigious schools. There family is loaded!" Everyone seemed to understand now but something still bothered Logan.

"Ok, so he's rich. What does that have to do with anything?" Mrs. Knight sighed.

"Lots of money means really good lawyer. He pled not guilty. He's going to try and convince the judge that your mentally unstable, that you made everything up."

"WHAT!" James, Carlos, and Kendall all stood up looking at Mrs. Knight with disbelief. What idiot judge would believe that Logan made everything up? It just didn't make sense.

"Mom, you can't be serious." She sighed sadly.

"I am Kendall. Ryan's lawyer wants to get Logan's testimony today." Logan swallowed hard and slid down in the bed. He almost hoped that a hole would open up and swallow him up. Logan was worried about the trial enough. Why did Ryan have to make everything so hard to deal with? Kendall was snapped out of his anger when he heard beeping next to him. He didn't know how to read a heart monitor but he knew lots of beeping wasn't a good thing. He turned back around to see that Logan had his eyes closed and was trying to control his breathing. Kendall sat down and started rubbing Logan's arm.

"Logan everything's going to be ok, calm down." Kendall continued to rub Logan's arm when a nurse walked in.

"Is everything ok in here?" She peaked at the monitor to see that Logan's heart rate was starting to slow. Kendall turned still rubbing his arm.

"Yea, he just got a little anxious." The nurse nodded and left. Kendall turned to Logan and leaned in slightly. "Do you think you'll need to start taking those pills again?" Logan looked down feeling a little embarrassed. After Logan's mother died he had to take anxiety pills. After a year he was able to stop taking them but Kendall was starting to worry that everything was going to be too much for Logan.

"I don't know." Logan turned to Mrs. Knight who was watching quietly. "When is she coming?" Mrs. Knight looked at her watch.

"I few hours." Logan nodded and turned back to Kendall.

"Give me your phone."

* * *

"Hello Dr. Trager. Thanks for coming on such short notice. The blonde woman smiled and walked over to Logan shaking his hand. She pulled up a chair and sat down next to Logan.

"It's nice to see you again Logan. How are you?" She studied Logan carefully.

"I guess I'm fine, considering the circumstances." Dr. Trager nodded in understanding.

"So why did you ask me to come see you?" Logan sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He looked at the door briefly wishing he hadn't asked everyone to leave.

"I'm just really nervous. I was worried about the trial before but now everything is worse. What if I can't convince the judge that Ryan is a bad guy? I mean he supposedly has this amazing reputation. What if no one believes me?" Dr. Trager patted Logan's hand comfortingly.

"Logan, did Ryan hit you?" Logan nodded his head. "Did he rape you?" Logan flinched at the thought but again nodded his head. "Did he shoot you?" Logan nodded his head. "You know what happened. The facts are the facts. The evidence is there and there are even witnesses. Everything is going to be fine. You have to believe in yourself." Logan nodded letting out a breath. He knew that Dr. Trager would make him feel better.

"Thank you." Dr. Trager smiled at Logan then wrote something down on her clipboard. Logan looked at the clipboard causing a thought to come to him.

"I-is what we talked about in our sessions going to be part of the trail?" Dr. Trager shook her head causing Logan to sigh in relief. He didn't want all those people knowing about all the stuff he talked about in therapy. It was so personal and private.

"The patient's privacy is the number one priority. The only one who sees this is you and I." Logan smiled at Dr. Trager who stood. "Before I leave Kendall told me that he was worried about you anxiety." Logan nodded looking down. Logan looked up when he heard the sound of ripping paper. Dr. Trager handed him a sheet with prescription written on it. "Those aren't anxiety pills exactly. They have the same affect of calming you down but I don't think you need full blown anxiety pills. Once the trial is over I want you to stop taking them. It's obvious the only thing making you anxious is this trial. Logan nodded while looking at the paper. Before Dr. Trager could leave Dr. Wells walked into the room, a second later James, Carlos and Kendall ran in.

"Hello Logan, I hope wasn't interrupting anything." Logan shook his head. Dr. Wells turned to Dr. Trager and shook her hand. "Hello Nicole, it's been too long." She smiled at Dr. Wells.

"Yes it has. It seems we have common patient this time around. I hope your handling these boys well. They seem to be a handful." Dr. Trager smiled at the three boys who were surrounding Logan's bed. They were each trying to take the paper from Logan but Logan was holding it away from them and trying to keep them quiet. Dr. Wells smiled and walked towards Logan.

"So Logan, how are you feeling?"

"Pretty good." Logan looked down at the paper and reached it out handing it to Dr. Wells. Dr. Wells examined it for a moment then nodded.

"I see Dr. Trager has prescribed PS pills to you (1). I'll get them to you as soon as I can." Dr. Wells smiled but his face quickly took a more serious tone. "Logan, do you remember what we talked about the last time you were here?" Logan nodded sparing a glance at his friends who were watching him confused. "Do you think you would be ok with the file being unsealed?"

"Logan what is he talking about?" Logan looked up at Kendall who was watching him worriedly. He looked back down and started rubbing Kendall's hand.

"When uh… the first time I came to the hospital they did this test to confirm that I was r-raped." Logan swallowed hard. He never realized how hard it was to say one word. "Before they did the test I didn't want them to cause I didn't want anyone to know and Dr. Wells said that I would regret it later so he promised to keep that part of the medical file a secret. Then when I came the second time he said that the courts were asking for the file but he couldn't give it to them so he said that the next time they asked he would ask me if I wanted to let them have that portion of the file." Logan looked up at his friends to see if they understood what he said. They seemed to understand. James was looking across the room in concentration when he turned to Logan.

"Well what are you going to do then?" Logan looked back down. He started twisting and playing with the blanket.

"Well we have emotion abuse, assault and battery, and attempted murder so the most he is looking at is life in prison so I… don't really… find… it necessary." Logan's voice dropped to a whisper when he finished. He didn't want to see the expressions on his friend's faces, they were probably furious with him.

"Logan you cannot be serious." Kendall emphasized the word cannot when he spoke. "Logan you can't let him get away with it, he RAPED YOU!"

"YOU DON"T THINK I KNOW THAT!" Everyone was taken aback by Logan's sudden outburst. "I'M TIRED OF BEING REMINDED ABOUT IT! I TALKED ABOUT IT I TOLD YOU ABOUT IT WHY WON'T YOU JUST LEAVE IT!" Kendall sat on the bed taking Logan's hands.

"I won't leave it because I know you'll never forgive yourself if he doesn't go to jail for this! He may get life in prison without it but he needs to punished for what hurt you the most!" Logan was hanging his head as he silently cried. Kendall knew he was starting to get through but he had to push a little further, he just hoped he wouldn't go too far. "What are you going to do if he doesn't go to jail, huh?" Logan looked up at Kendall confused. "He's trying to discredit you remember. It's going to be easy for him to make some excuse for how you got hurt but he can't make an excuse for raping you when the evidence is right there!" Kendall pointed at the file that Dr. Wells was holding in his hands. Logan glanced behind Kendall to see that no one had left the room. Every face he scanned over was staring at him but none of their faces were accusing, angry, or sympathetic. They were all showing him reassurance; they were ready to be there for him every step of the way. Logan sighed dropping his gaze once again. He bit his lip thinking everything over. Whether he wanted to admit it or not Kendall was right but it was hard enough telling his friends, how was he going to tell total strangers?

"I don't know if I can do it Kendall." Logan sniffed and tugged on Kendall's shirt. Kendall got the message and leaned in giving Logan a hug. Logan's breath hick upped a couple of times as Kendall rubbed his back.

"Please Logan." Logan let out a long shaky sigh and tightened his grip on Kendall.

"I'm scared Kendall. Promise me you'll be there." Kendall pulled away from Logan and gripped his shoulders.

"Of course I'll be there. I would never want to be anywhere else." Logan smiled slightly and wiped his nose.

"Ok." Everyone in the room sighed in relief. Dr. Trager and Dr. Wells said goodbye before silently exiting. James and Carlos walked over to Logan's bed and sat down.

"We'll be there for you too Logan." Logan smiled at his friends. He felt better with them around. They weren't sitting for too long when Mrs. Knight came in. She looked slightly agitated and worried. When she was fully in the room a short brunette woman walked in after her. The woman was wearing a power suit and had her hair tied back in a tight bun. Logan felt instantly intimidated by this woman. She watched him cold and accusingly. Logan quickly wiped any remnants of tears away and looked at Kendall anxiously. Kendall gripped Logan's hand tightly and rubbed his thumb over Logan's knuckle. Logan looked away from Kendall when he noticed someone else walking in. A tall slim man walked in with a small camera. The woman pulled a large chair to the foot of Logan's bed as the man with the camera stood behind her.

"Hi I'm Logan. Who are you?" The woman looked up at Logan coldly while she continued to get out a pad of paper and a pen. When she finished she crossed her legs and looked at Logan.

"I know who you are Mr. Mitchell. My name is Anne Stewart and I am the defendants, Ryan Chester's, lawyer." Now before we beginning I'm going to have to ask for everyone except Mr. Mitchell to leave." Logan's eyes widened and he gripped Kendall's hand tightly.

"What, why can't they stay?" Anne rolled her eyes at Logan and glared at him.

"I can't have your testimony being swayed by any outside parties so if you don't mind." She waved her hand at them then continued to look at Logan coldly. James and Carlos stood slowly glaring at the woman all the way out the door. Mrs. Knight followed right behind them making sure to glare before she was out of sight. Kendall was the last to stand up. He kissed Logan's forehead and whispered encouragement into his ear before walking past Anne. He made sure to "accidentally" bump into her chair and hiss out an apology before closing the door behind him. "Now Logan, why don't you tell me what you believed happened. Logan raised an eyebrow at the woman.

"Don't you mean what actually happened?"

"No, I don't."

"o…key. Um well when I first met Ryan he seemed nice but then he started hurting me. First he would bite me and grab me really harshly. I just ignored it at first but then one day when we were in the lobby he was trying to convince me to have… sex with him but I didn't want to. He pinned me against the wall and I was able to get him to stop after I yelled at him. When he tried again I pushed him and he threw me into the wall and-"

"So you're saying you pushed my client?" Logan was taken aback by Mrs. Stewart's interruption.

"Y-yes but only because he was hurting me and then he threw me into a wall.

"Are you sure you didn't trip and fall into the wall after you pushed my client. My client states," Mrs. Stewart looked down at a sheet of paper and read off of it. _"After I tried repeatedly to calm Logan down he pushed me harshly. When I fell back I grabbed Logan's arms. He fell into the wall and then screamed at me saying I threw him."_ Logan didn't know what to say.

"But that's not what happened…"

"Logan it says here that you are in therapy. Is that true?" Logan swallowed hard.

"I've seen a therapist yes but that was so I could come to terms with my emotions after Ryan… assaulted me."

"I see. Now what can you tell me about your home life." Logan looked at her confused.

"What do you…"

"Your mother was an alcoholic, am I correct?" Logan's jaw dropped. Why was she bringing this up?

"Y-yes, but what does that have to do with this?" Mrs. Stewart opened her pen and began to write something down.

"So you grew up in an unstable environment and you're in therapy for uncontrollable emotions. It's clear that your environment has made you unstable." Logan didn't know what to do. Everything he was saying was getting thrown back in his face and he didn't know how much longer he could take it.

"I-I'm not unstable. Ryan hit me and threw me against a wall. Then he r-raped me and threw me down a flight of stairs!"

"So now he threw you down a flight of stare? Your story is starting to look more and more like a lie.

"It's not a lie!" Mrs. Stewart looked smugly at Logan before standing up.

"Uncontrollable anger as well, I think we're done for now." Logan watched as the lawyer left. As soon as she was out of sight he burst into tears.

* * *

Kendall was pacing in the hall waiting for Logan's testimony to end. He didn't like that woman. She was obviously out to get Logan and Kendall was afraid of the lengths she would go to discredit Logan. After about 10 minutes the lawyer walked out. Kendall thought it was strange that it was over so quickly but when he saw the smug look on her face he knew there was a reason for that. James, Carlos and Kendall all stood still as they watched her walk past them. About a second later they heard loud sobbing coming from Logan's room. They each looked at each other before sprinting over.

"What the fuck did that bitch do?" Kendall hissed out. He ran into the room and immediately ran over to Logan's side.

"Kendall!" Logan held out his arms so Kendall would hug him. Kendall pulled Logan to his chest and rocked him. James and Carlos sat on the other side of the bed rubbing Logan's back. "No one's ever going to believe me! She threw everything I said back in my face! She even asked me about my mom!" Kendall tried not to get angry even though he knew he wanted to. The bitch played dirty and Kendall wanted to teach her a lesson. He pulled away from Logan and cupped his cheeks.

"No matter what anyone says I'm going to be there for you next time." Logan nodded his head in understand. He gripped Kendall's shirt and shut his eyes tightly as more tears fell. It took a straight hour of reassuring back rubs, hugs, and kisses to Logan's cheeks, mouth, and forehead to get him calmed down. Kendall laid Logan back in bed as his eyes began to drift shut. When Logan was fast asleep Kendall sat back and rubbed his temples. He sighed and looked to James and Carlos who were just as frustrated.

"What now?"

**A/N: lucky for all of you I ended classes early today and there's a football game so no one's around. I hope you enjoyed this chapter it took awhile to get this done.**

**There's more to come**

**(1): I totally made that up. I don't know if anything like that actually exist and franking I don't care. Lol =] **


	18. video

Logan was sitting on the edge of his hospital bed waiting to be cleared to leave. James was taking Logan's stuff to the car, Carlos was getting Logan a wheel chair and Kendall was with Dr. Wells getting his prescriptions. After ten or so minutes Kendall walked in with a small bag. Logan smiled at Kendall and jumped down from the bed to give Kendall a hug. The minute he jumped down Kendall stopped and crossed his arms. Logan pouted and sat back down.

"I can walk you know. My legs aren't broken." Kendall chuckled and ruffled Logan's hair. Logan made a face and pushed Kendall's hand away not dropping his pout.

"Dr. Well's says you need to rest. So stay put until Carlos gets back." At the moment Carlos ran in with the wheel chair. He came in so fast he slammed into the bed. Logan looked at Carlos wide eyed then turned to Kendall.

"You're not letting him push me right?" Kendall was smirking at Carlos when he shook his head. Logan sighed with relief and jumped down again to sit in the chair. Kendall took hold of the handles and started pushing Logan out the door. Before they were able to leave Dr. Wells walked over to them.

"Logan, I'm glad you're finally able to leave." Logan smiled up at the doctor who smiled back. Dr. Wells bent down slightly and patted Logan's shoulder. "Good luck Logan." Logan nodded and thanked the doctor for all he did. Kendall pushed Logan out the door and up to the car that James was waiting by. James and Kendall helped Logan into the car while Carlos brought the wheel chair back into the hospital. Once everyone was settled they drove back to the Palm Woods.

* * *

Walking through the lobby was awkward for Logan. Everyone was stopping to say hi to him or saying how they were happy he was ok. All the attention was embarrassing Logan so he was happy when they finally entered their apartment. Logan was about to go relax when he spotted Kelly talking to Mrs. Knight. A woman none of the boys had ever met was with them as well.

"Mom, Kelly what's going on?" Mrs. Knight turned to the four boys and glanced at each other quickly. Kelly gestured to the woman standing behind her, who walked over so she was next to Kelly.

"Guys this is Mary Jay Fin. The boys raised their hands slowly and waved still confused. "Gustavo heard about what happened yesterday with Ryan's lawyer so we got Logan a lawyer. The four boys looked to each other then at the woman who was smiling brightly at them. At least she looked a lot nicer. She reached out her hand toward Logan and Logan tentatively grasped her hand.

"Hello Logan it's nice to meet you." Logan smiled shyly and pulled his hand back.

"Hi." Kelly smiled and started heading toward the door.

"Ok, I'll give you some time to talk." When Kelly was gone everyone walked over to the couch. Logan sat next to Kendall, James sat next to Kendall and Carlos sat on the floor by everyone's feet. Mary Jay pulled up at chair and sat in front of the boys while Mrs. Knight walked back into the Kitchen.

"Alright Logan why don't you tell me what happened yesterday so we can start with damage control."

"Damage control?" Logan asked confused.

"Yes, we have to make sure that the jury realizes that everything Anne believes isn't true. In order to win we have to prove to everyone that you aren't lying and that Ryan is." Logan nodded and took a breath before explaining everything. Mary Jay listened intently and continued to keep quiet after Logan was done speaking. "Ok we're going to have to prepare you for the court room. They're going to ask you some tough questions and you have to answer them honestly no matter what." Logan nodded swallowing hard. "Also, you have to remember to remain calm, any outburst will just help to prove the point Ryan's lawyer is trying to make. Ok," Mary Jay pulled out a pad of paper and crossed her legs, "Let's go over some questions I'm going to ask." Logan nodded gripping Kendall's hand tightly. "Can you describe the events leading up the day of the attack?" Logan shifted in his seat and cleared his throat.

"Ok." Logan explained in as much detail as he could everything that happened. From the first date all the way until the moment Ryan shoved him into the wall." When Logan finished Mary Jay smiled to show he did a good job.

"Ryan states that he didn't try to shove you that you merely fell, do you think this could be true?"

"N-no. He grabbed my upper arms and slammed me into the wall. Then he told me to never push him again and then he pulled me forward and pushed me back again." Mary Jay nodded again.

"Now the supposed attack was the following day. What do you think caused it?"

"Well, after he shoved me I decided to break up with him."

"And after you broke up with him he attacked you?" Logan nodded but then stopped.

"Well not exactly after. I broke up with him in the park and I waited until after he left to go back to my apartment but before I could get there he grabbed me and dragged me into his apartment." After 20 minutes Logan and his lawyer had gone over all the questions. It was hard for Logan but he was able to describe the attack and the rape fully. It didn't get any easier each time he did it but he had to get used to it.

"You did very well Logan. That's all I have time for today but tomorrow Anne Stewart is going to be talking to you again and this time I'll be there." Logan nodded somewhat relieved.

"Since Anne is talking to me does that mean you talked to Ryan?" Mary Jay nodded her head.

"Yes, I've already recorded his first testimony." Logan swallowed and looked down at his lap.

"Can I see it?" Everyone stared at Logan in disbelief.

"Logan I don't think that's such a…"

"I want to see it, Kendall. I need to see it." Kendall sighed but didn't stop Logan. Mary Jay handed Logan the DVD and watched as he plopped it into the DVD player. Everyone sat tensely watching Logan worriedly. Logan stood watching the screen and unconsciously stepped back a little when Ryan popped up on the screen.

"Mr. Chester, can you explain to me what happened between you and Logan Mitchell?" Ryan scoffed and looked to Mary Jay seriously.

"Yea, I met Logan when he was sitting by the pool. He was all by himself looking bored. I wanted to be a nice guy and talked to him. After we started dating a realized what kind of person he is. He's a total prude. There would be times when I would brush against him and he would flip out saying I was trying to pressure him. And then the day in the lobby he was coming on to me. I tried to stop him because I mean come on we were in public but he just wasn't having it. When I wouldn't give in he pushed me and that's when he fell into the wall. He started screaming and crying and saying I threw him. He was going crazy. I think he's like bipolar or something."

"You think my client is mentally unstable?" Ryan scoffed again and leaned forward.

"Well yea, everyone thinks it. He freaks out over the smallest things, he freaks out when someone touches him, and he freaks out when he doesn't get his way. The guy doesn't have control over his emotions. I mean first he breaks up with me then he comes running into my apartment begging for me to take him back. We ended up having sex and right after we were done he started freaking out. I tried to calm him down but he just wouldn't have it. He threw himself around and fell over things. And then he fell down the stairs." Ryan looked up and sighed annoyed. "Just because he regrets having sex doesn't mean he can accuse me of raping him. He's mentally unstable and his three friends just fuel his emotional issues. I feel sorry for him. I mean he even shot himself!" Ryan pointed to himself with a look of disbelief. "I'm the victim here. I shouldn't go to jail because of him." Logan stopped the video and just stared at the blank screen. No one moved or said anything. They all stared at Logan waiting for a reaction.

"He's so convincing. He looks so calm and anyone else would think he is being completely honest." Kendall stood up slowly and walked over to Logan. Logan turned around and looked up at Kendall. "They're going to believe him." Kendall couldn't stand the look in Logan's eyes. Any hope he had was gone and there was nothing left but defeat.

"Logan you can't think like that." Logan ignored Kendall and walked towards his room.

"I'm going to take a nap." Kendall stared at the closed door sadly but then turned to Logan's lawyer.

"Is he right, is it already over?" Mary Jay sighed and stood up.

"Not yet. We are going to have to fight hard. Logan was right when he said a jury would believe Ryan. Logan has to be ten times more convincing, this all depends on him." Mary Jay left silently leaving the three boys to think. Carlos leaned back and sighed angrily.

"This is so frustrating!" Kendall sat back down on the couch sighing as well.

"I know."

* * *

Logan awoke to his phone vibrating. He picked it up and after blinking away his sleepy, blurry eyes he realized the number was from an unknown caller. Logan was afraid to pick up at first but he knew for a fact it couldn't be Ryan.

"Hello?"

"Hello Logan it's Mary Jay." Logan sighed and sat up. He glanced at the clock to see that it had only been an hour since he fell asleep.

"Ms. Fin? What can I do for you?"

"I just got a call from the judge saying that the trail was pushed back a week. Instead of being in three days the trial is going to be in ten days." Logan sighed annoyed. He just wanted to get this over with.

"Why would they do that?"

"It seems that Mr. Edward Chester is friends with the judge and was able to get him to postpone the trial in order to give Ryan more time." Logan flopped down on his bed sighing again.

"His father is friends with the judge? Isn't that a little unfair?" Mary Jay sighed.

"Yes but there's nothing we can do about it now. The good thing is it gives us more time as well." Logan agreed then hung up the phone. He got up from his bed. He stretched his muscles and walked towards the door. He opened the door slowly peeking out to see if anyone was around. When he realized no one was there he sighed and walked back into his room. He needed to get some air so Logan threw on his swim trunks grabbed a towel and started walking towards the door. Logan was pulling it open when a hand pushed the door shut. Logan glanced over to see Kendall smiling at him.

"Where are you going?" Logan raised an eyebrow and stepped back pointing to himself.

"It's not obvious." Kendall rolled his eyes at Logan his smile showing he wasn't that annoyed.

"Yes Logan but you are supposed to be resting." Logan whined and dropped his arms down.

"I can rest at the pool."

"No you can't"

"Yes I can."

"No you can't"

"Yes! I can"

"No! You can't" Kendall had his arms crossed and had a giant smirk on his face. He was completely amused by this.

"Yes I can. Come on Kendall please! I won't go in the pool. I'll sit on a chair and relax. I just want to get some fresh air. Please!" Logan stuck out his bottom lip and fluttered his eyes. Kendall leaned back whining slightly. He couldn't stand the puppy face. His sister did it, Carlos did it, and now Logan, he knew he was going to cave. He sighed heavily and nodded. Logan smiled brightly and clapped letting out a small "yey." Kendall grabbed Logan's arm before he could get fully out of the apartment.

"You can go to the pool but the pool only. Carlos and James are down there and I'm gunna text them to keep an eye on you. If you step one foot anywhere else I'll know about it." Logan narrowed his eyes but didn't drop his smile.

"Fine I promise I won't go anywhere except the pool… and the lobby… and the bathroom."

"Logan…"

"What! I have to go through the lobby to get to the pool and what if I need to pee." Logan had a playful smirk on his face.

"Fine smart ass, you can go to the pool, the lobby, and the bathroom, but that's it." Logan smiled and kissed Kendall's lips. He went to leave but then stopped.

"Oh I almost forgot. My lawyer called, the trail is ten days away instead of three now." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows.

"Why?" Logan sighed and looked away from Kendall.

"Apparently Ryan's father is friends with the judge." Kendall sighed and ran his hands through his hair.

"This just keeps getting better and better." Kendall said sarcastically. Logan sighed and nodded before kissing Kendall again and leaving. When he walked through the lobby he noticed no one was coming up to him like yesterday. He was happy about it a first but then he noticed a few people looking at him weirdly. Logan shook it off and headed for the pool. He found a nice lounge chair and laid down. He sighed enjoying the sunlight and the breeze that would come through every now and then. He laid there for a long time but after a while he couldn't help but feel like someone was watching him. He knew that James and Carlos were supposed to keep an eye on him but something was off. Logan opened his eyes and sat up slowly trying not to disturb his stitches. Logan looked around and realized everyone was staring at him. People would whisper to each other then glance over at Logan with a dirty look. When Logan looked over to a table he noticed a small group surrounding a laptop computer. He noticed that the group would look at what was on the computer then glance over at Logan. Logan stood up and walked over to the group. They were all people he had seen around the Palm Woods. The three Jennifers were even there. When he reached the group they all fell silent and stared at him.

"What are you guys looking at?" The blonde Jennifer stood up and walked up to Logan. She looked him up and down before staring at him accusingly.

"I can't believe you're doing this. You had us all fooled." Logan furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"What are you talking about?" The blonde Jennifer stepped to the side allowing Logan through. When he reached the table the brunette Jennifer turned the computer so Logan could see it. Logan furrowed his eyebrows when he realized they were looking at a YouTube video. The brunette Jennifer clicked the mouse causing the video to play again. Logan's eyes widened when he realized what the video was. Someone had combined Ryan's testimony with the small one Logan gave and posted it on YouTube. The last part of the video was Logan yelling that he wasn't lying and a sentence appeared.

"Does it really look like Ryan's lying?" Logan stood up straight and glanced around. Everyone was glaring at him. He backed up and stared at the group.

"How can you believe him? You were all in the lobby, you saw what happened." The blonde Jennifer stepped back in front of Logan and crossed her arms.

"We saw you stumble into the lobby and then we saw Kendall beat up Ryan. We didn't see Ryan do anything. I should have known better, Ryan's a good guy." Logan bit his lip to stop it from shaking.

"But I'm not lying."

"Whatever." The blonde Jennifer turned back around everyone else doing the same. Logan covered his mouth to suppress a sob and quickly walked back towards the lobby. He caught a quick glance of James and Carlos looking at him with furrowed eyebrows. When Logan reached the elevator he heard loud footsteps behind him. Logan stepped into the elevator, James and Carlos running in right after him. Logan leaned against the wall and kept his eyes down.

"Logan, what happened?" Logan let out a shaky sigh and looked up at James. Tears fell down Logan's face blurring his vision.

"Someone put Ryan's testimony on the internet and everyone's seen it. They believe him." Logan looked back down crying.

"Logan, what do you mean?" Logan looked over at Carlos but the elevator doors opened before he could say anything. Logan walked passed them and into 2J. When he walked in Kendall was watching TV. Kendall didn't look up but when he saw Carlos grab Logan from the corner of his eye he looked up.

"Logan, what exactly happened?" Kendall got up and walked over quickly. He stood next to Carlos and Logan and looked at Carlos confused.

"Carlos what…" Kendall stopped when he noticed Logan was crying. Kendall grabbed Logan's shoulders and turned him to face Kendall.

"Logan, what's going on?" Logan wiped his nose and pulled out of Kendall's grasp.

"Follow me." James, Carlos, and Kendall looked at each other but followed Logan to Kendall and Logan's room. Logan grabbed his laptop and turned it on. He opened the YouTube homepage and found the video. He played it and stood back as they all watched. When the video ended James, Carlos, and Kendall turned to Logan with wide eyes. They all stood up so they were in front of Logan.

"Logan who did that?" Logan shook his head as more tears fell. He looked up at Kendall sadly as a small sob came out.

"I don't know! But everyone has seen it and they were all giving me dirty looks. There was a group of kids sitting by the pool and they kept looking over at me so I went over to see what they were doing and they showed me the video. I told them I wasn't lying but they didn't believe me! Blonde Jennifer said that she knew she shouldn't have believed me because Ryan's a good guy. How am I supposed to convince total strangers that I'm not lying if people I've known for months won't believe me?" Logan turned away from his friends and took a few steps. "I can't take the way they were looking at me. I'm never leaving the apartment again!" Logan ran towards his room and went to shut the door. Logan looked down confused when the door didn't close but bounced back open. Kendall had stuck his foot out preventing it from closing. Logan sighed and walked over to his bed and laid down. "I don't want to talk about it. I'm staying here and I'm not going anywhere else. Kendall walked in and closed the door. He went over to the bed and laid behind Logan wrapping his arms around him.

"Forget them Logan. They aren't real friends. Logan let out a sob and he shut his eyes. His body began to shake as more sobs came out. Kendall leaned up so he was more above Logan. He stroked his face and kissed his cheek trying to calm him down. "It's going to be ok."

"No it's not! You didn't see how they looked at me! They're treating me like it's all my fault! Ryan attacked me and everyone's treating me like the bad guy!" Kendall kissed Logan's face more and laid down with his chin resting on the top of Logan's head.

"Shhh… its gunna be ok."

**A/N: this chapter didn't turn out that bad. It started out slow but once I thought about the idea with the YouTube video I went right through it. well anyway, I hope you enjoyed this.**

**There's more to come!**


	19. don't give up yet

To say that Ms. Fin was outraged when she heard about the video on the internet just didn't cover it. At soon as James had called her she went to work on getting the video taken down. After speaking to at least ten different people the video was finally removed but it had already done the damage. Kendall, James, and Carlos had managed to get Logan out of the apartment but as soon as they stepped out of the elevator Logan turned around and ran back in before the doors closed. The minute Logan had stepped into the lobby people had started glaring at him and he just couldn't take it. To say that Kendall was furious, just didn't cover it. He had gone to shout and curse at everyone but before he could get a word out James and Carlos had covered his mouth and dragged Kendall into the elevator. The last thing they needed was to make everything worse. Kendall had called Dr. Trager again who was happy to see Logan again but even she was barely able to lift Logan's spirits. At the current time Kendall, James and Carlos were all sitting on the couch watching TV. Dr. Trager, Mrs. Knight, Kelly, and Ms. Fin were all sitting around the kitchen counter talking quietly while they waited for Ryan's lawyer to arrive. The three boys glanced up when they noticed Logan walk into the room. They normal would have continued watching TV but Logan had done this at least 50 times already. He would walk into the room, look around, then glance at the clock and make a quiet whining noise. After that he would turn around and go back to his room. Kendall sat up straight not able to take any more of this. When Logan walked by the couch Kendall reached out and pulled him down. Logan yelped and fell over the arm of the couch landing with his butt on Kendall's lap and his upper body resting on the rest of the couch. Logan's back was arched slightly since Kendall's lap was higher up then the rest of the couch. Logan looked up at Kendall who was looking down at him with concern.

"Kendall! Why did you do that?" Logan whined. Kendall placed his hand on Logan's stomach and rubbed in a circular motion.

"I did that because you're freaking out. You need to calm down… did you take you meds?" Logan looked away from Kendall. He hated that he needed to take those pills. It made him feel like he was crazy and the fact that almost everyone he knew thought so too didn't help.

"Yes." Kendall noticed Logan's tone and sighed. He sounded like Kendall when his mom asked him if he had cleaned his room.

"Logan, you know I only ask because I care about you." Logan sighed and nodded. He started to zone out until he felt Kendall's hand going dangerously low. Logan squeaked and jerked in Kendall's lap. He looked up at Kendall wide eyed but soon shifted his expression into a scowl. Kendall was smirking down at him trying to suppress a laugh.

"Don't do that there are people around!" Logan hissed out. Logan looked around to see if anyone had noticed. Everyone in the Kitchen hadn't even moved an inch and James and Carlos's eyes were glued to the TV. Logan looked back up at Kendall who was still smirking at him.

"Don't do what? Don't do this." Kendall's hand was suddenly cupping Logan though his jeans. Logan let out another squeak and smacked Kendall's hand. Kendall pulled Logan up slowly so he was sitting up on his lap. He wrapped his arms around Logan and pulled him back so his back was fully pressed against Kendall's chest. Logan shivered when he felt Kendall's breath by his ear. "If you feel anxious when you're giving your testimony think of this… I want you Logan." Logan bit back a moan when Kendall nibbled on his ear. "Think of all the pleasure I could give you… got it?" Kendall thruster his hips up grinding against Logan's butt. Logan let out a shaky breath at the feel of Kendall's rubbing against him.

"O-ok." Kendall grabbed Logan's hips and lifted him up so he was sitting next to him instead of on top of him. Logan hadn't registered that Kendall had moved him until he heard snickering beside him. He opened his eyes to see that Kendall was smirking at him. Logan blushed and slide down in the couch a little.

"You're such a tease." Kendall laughed and leaned over kissing Logan on the cheek. Before he pulled away he whispered into his ear.

"That was nothing compared to what I could really do to you." Logan couldn't help but let out a small moan. When everyone turned to him Logan quickly followed up the moan with a cough. He glared at Kendall who was clutching his stomach and laughing.

"Jerk." A knock came to the door causing everyone but Logan to look up and glare. They all knew who it was and none of them were going to take any crap from her this time around. Mrs. Knight walked over to the door and let Mrs. Stewart walk in. She was as cold as ever and Logan couldn't help but swallow hard. Kendall gripped his hand and gave him a reassuring look. Ms. Fin walked over to Mrs. Stewart and shook her hand with a fake smile.

"Anne Stewart it's a pleasure to meet you." Mrs. Stewart smiled back with a smile that was equally as fake.

"Mary Jay Fin, it's nice to meet you as well."

"I'm assuming you're here to get a new testimony from Logan." Mrs. Stewart looked at Ms. Fin with furrowed eyebrows.

"A new testimony?"

"Well yes of course. I'm sure you're aware of the video that was put up on the internet. In accordance with article one section Z that testimony has become null and void." Ms. Fin smiled brightly before continuing. "And I hope you know that if you still plan on using it I'll make sure that that video never sees the light of day." He words were harsh but her smile never faltered. The four boys glanced at each other with "oh snap!" faces. If they didn't know any better a cat fight was about to break out. Mrs. Stewart frowned but smiled again.

"Of course I'm here for a new testimony. It's truly a shame that someone would do that to your client. I apologize for letting anyone that cold hearted get a hold of that video." Ms. Fin nodded and walked over to the couch were everyone was. Dr. Trager, Kelly and Mrs. Knight stayed in the kitchen watching while everyone else sat down in the living room. Logan was sitting on the couch with Kendall on his right and James and Carlos on his left. Mrs. Stewart sat in a chair in front of them while Ms. Fin sat in another chair more to the side. Mrs. Stewart glanced at Logan's three friends coldly. "Are they staying?"

"Yes." Kendall hissed out coldly. If she thought she was getting her way this time she was dead wrong. Mrs. Stewart ignored his tone and began.

"Mr. Mitchell you believe my client assaulted you is that correct."

"Yes."

"Can you tell me everything you believe he did?" Logan explained everything that happened in as much detail as he could. From the beginning all the way up to when Ryan started calling and when he showed up at the apartment. Mrs. Stewart looked down at her notes then looked at Logan again. "Isn't it correct that you are in Therapy for unstable emotions?" Logan took in a breath then glanced up at everyone. They were all giving him reassuring looks. He looked at his lap and took in another deep breath before speaking.

"Yes but that tends to happen when your assaulted." Kendall squeezed Logan's hand. Logan didn't need to see Kendall's face to know he was smirking. Logan glanced over at Ms. Fin who was smirking as well and gave him thumbs up. Logan looked back at Mrs. Stewart who was frowning at him.

"Normally I would say you were right Mr. Mitchell but you grew up in quit an unstable environment, is that correct?

"Yes."

"You had to take medication because of that unstable environment?"

"Yes."

"And you are taking medication now, correct." Logan swallowed hard.

"Yes."

"Couldn't it be said then that your unstable emotions caused you to over react to situations that involved my client. Couldn't it be said that you were never assaulted?" Logan wasn't sure how to respond. This final statement could change everything. He had been able to keep calm so far but what if he messed up? What if he said something and it was thrown back in his face again. Logan stayed quiet for a moment trying to think of what to say when he thought back to that day. He thought about everything and he realized something. He looked up at Mrs. Stewart with determination.

"Having a bad passed, being in therapy, and taking medication doesn't affect my memory. Ryan assaulted me. He hit me on numerous occasions; he raped me, and shot me. That's the truth whether people want to believe it or not." Mrs. Stewart was frowning still. This hadn't gone as she planned. She stood up thanking everyone and shook Ms. Fin's hand. Everyone stood up when she walked over to the door and they all remained silent when she was gone. Logan sighed heavily and turned to everyone.

"Did I do a good job?" Kendall grabbed Logan's should shaking him playfully and laughing.

"Did you do a good job? You were amazing! There is no way Ryan is getting out of this now!" Kendall pulled Logan into a tight hug and swung him around. James and Carlos came over next and patted Logan on the back.

"Great job Logan, did you see that ladies face! Oh my god priceless!" Carlos exclaimed excitedly.

"That's the last time she'll think she can mess with Logan Mitchell." James added. Logan rubbed the back of his neck blushing. Mrs. Knight and Kelly each came over giving Logan a quick hug. Ms. Fin came over and patted Logan's shoulder.

"Good job Logan. With a testimony like that we have this case in the bag. No amount of money or friends in higher places will stop Ryan Chester from going to prison for a long time." Logan nodded and smiled.

"You were pretty cool to Ms. Fin. I thought Mrs. Stewart was scary but you sure showed her." Ms. Fin smiled brightly at Logan.

"It's all part of the job." After a few goodbyes Kelly and Ms. Fin left. Dr. Trager was the last person to walk over to Logan.

"So Logan how do you feel?" Logan sighed and smiled shyly.

"I feel pretty good. For the first time in a while I think I can actually win this." Dr. Trager smiled at everyone and left as well. Logan was standing smiling when he felt someone behind him.

"You know a good job deserves a reward." Logan bit his lip at the feel of Kendall's tongue on his neck.

"K-Kendall… isn't it a bad idea to do… that before my stitches completely heal?" Kendall chuckled and wrapped his hands around Logan's hips pulling him close.

"Your right Logan but I can think of other things we could do." Logan took in a shuttering breath before he let Kendall lead them into their room. Logan glanced over to the couch to see that James and Carlos had resumed their positions they had before Ryan's lawyer showed up. He couldn't help but notice however when they glanced quickly towards him and Kendall with smirks. When they entered the room Kendall shut the door and locked it. He gently pushed Logan down on the bed and hovered above him. Kendall lowered his lips to Logan's neck, sucking and licking his skin. He lifted Logan's shirt up feeling the warm flesh as it was slowly uncovered. Once he had Logan's shirt completely off Kendall went back to kissing his neck. Logan softly fisted Kendall's hair moaning every now and then. Kendall moved further down Logan's body and stopped at his collar bone. He sucked on the skin there lightly nipping it and causing Logan to moan. Kendall pulled away noticing that a light mark was starting to form there. He smiled suddenly becoming aware of Logan's thrusting hips. Logan was moaning as he tried to find even the smallest amount of friction. Kendall moved back up Logan so they were face to face. He kissed Logan's cheeks and the corner of his mouth before hovering over his lips.

"Calm down Logie, we're just getting started. Logan moaned and pulled Kendall into a kiss. Kendall licked Logan's bottom lip entering once Logan opened his mouth. Kendall rubbed his tongue against Logan's exploring his mouth. Logan moaned into the kiss eventually breaking away needing air. Kendall moved down so he was at Logan's nipple and latched on. Logan groaned and fisted his own hair. Kendall flicked his tongue around the nub and lightly nipped it. He lifted his hand to the other nipple tweaking it slightly. Logan arched into the touch and let out another moan.

"Kendall please…" Kendall moved down to Logan's zipper and quickly removed his pants. He rubbed Logan through his boxers causing Logan to thrust his hips into the touch. Kendall removed Logan's boxers and grasped onto Logan's erection. Logan unconsciously spread his legs wider as he moaned again. Kendall got a sudden idea and stuck his fingers in his mouth. Once he felt they were wet enough he started putting pressure at Logan's entrance. Logan gripped the bed sheets thrusting down into Kendall's finger. Kendall wrapped his mouth around the head of Logan's erection while he pushed into Logan's entrance. Logan whimpered slightly but the feel of Kendall's mouth sucking on Logan's head caused him to moan. Kendall moved his finger in and out adding another when he felt the muscles loosen. Logan covered his mouth to prevent a scream from escaping when Kendall cocked his fingers and brushed against his prostrate. Logan was shaking and withering under Kendall's touch. Kendall was now bobbing up and down on Logan's member while he thruster his fingers in and out of Logan's entrance. Kendall pulled off of Logan's dick with a pop and couldn't help but moan at the sight of Logan. He was shaking and trusting his hips in time with Kendall's fingers. His eyes were shut and both his hands were covering his mouth to prevent the loud moans and screams that were threatening to come out. Kendall sped up his fingers and started to suck on the head of Logan's erection. Logan released the hold on his mouth and fisted the sheets below him. "Kendall I'm g-gunna!" Kendall pulled off of Logan so he could speak.

"Come for me babe." Kendall reattached his lips and took most of Logan into his mouth. Kendall thrusted his fingers into Logan hard causing Logan to arch off of the bed letting out a loud moan. Kendall continued to suck on Logan as Logan trusted his hips trying to push Kendall's fingers deeper. Kendall sucked Logan dry until Logan hips fell back down onto the bed. Kendall pulled his fingers out of Logan and moved up his body. Kendall kissed Logan's lips and laid down next to him. He pulled Logan close and threw a blanket over the both of them. Logan finally regained his compose and turned to Kendall.

"Wow…" Kendall smirked at Logan laughing.

"What?" Logan smiled and laid his head against Kendall's chest.

"That was amazing. I love you Kendall." Kendall smiled and kissed the top of Logan's head.

"I love you too."

**A/N: DONE! Maybe now I should do my homework lol. Anyway I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**There is more to come!**


	20. cold

Logan sighed and slid down on the couch. He was so bored of being in the apartment but he was too afraid to leave. He didn't want to face the glares and accusations that would certainly come as soon as he stepped foot into the lobby. Normal he would be getting one of his friends to entertain him but they all seemed to be busy at the moment. James had dragged Carlos to the mall for some sale and Kendall was sleeping off a headache. Logan turned off the TV finally deciding that there was nothing to watch.

"Over 500 channels and you'd think there was something on." Logan sighed in frustration. Logan huffed and stood up. He had enough of being afraid. He didn't do anything wrong so he had no reason to be afraid; he had every right to be at the pool just like everyone else. If anyone said anything he could get through it. Logan walked into his and Kendall's room as quietly as he could, not wanting to wake Kendall up. He pulled on his swim trunks (he could finally go into the pool) and a towel. Before he left the room he spotted his favorite book and grabbed it. It would be nice to finally read by the pool again. Logan took a breath before stepping out of the elevator. He kept his eyes to the ground avoiding anyone's gazes but he still felt all eyes on him. He sat down in a lounge chair off to the side so no one would really walk by him and started to read.

"Hey Logan." Logan looked up to see Camille, Stephanie and Jo looking down at him. He put the book down and smiled at them.

"Hi ladies, how are you?" They each smiled giving him a simultaneous "goods." Camille sat down in a chair next to Logan and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"How are you doing Logan?" Logan sighed noticing the sad looks in all three girls' faces.

"I'm doing pretty well considering. The fact that I was able to get myself out of the apartment is defiantly an accomplishment. The trial isn't too far off but I think I can actually win this. I'm still nervous about it but I know I can win." Logan smiled up at the three girls. He was reassuring himself just as much as he was reassuring them.

"We're glad you're doing better Logan." Jo explained.

"Yea, if you ever need anything don't hesitate to ask." Stephanie added." Logan smiled and nodded at the girls. He waved goodbye as they left the pool. Logan went back to reading but found that he slowly drifted off to sleep. He didn't know how long he had been out but maybe if he hadn't fallen asleep he could have seen people staring at him. He could have seen them plotting, he could have seen a group of guys walking over. Logan jerked awake yelping loudly when his whole body was covered with freezing cold water. Logan tired to get his breathing back to normal but the water was just so cold. There was no way that water was from the pool. Logan yelped again when he was hit with three more on slots of water. Logan was shaking so bad he barely registered people around him laughing.

"You like that Logan. You looked so hot so we thought you might need to cool off. We got the water straight from the freezer. Logan looked up to see three buff guys looking down at him. Before Logan could react they grabbed his chair and lifted it making Logan fly off and hit the ground hard. Logan whimpered in pain and held a hand to where his stitches were. After Logan was able recollect himself he started to stand so he could make a quiet exit. Before he could get fully up another bucket of ice water was dumped on him. This time Logan screamed, the water was just so cold he felt like his body would go numb.

"Sorry Logan, I hope you didn't think I was trying to hurt you. We wouldn't want you making up any more stories. Logan was still on his hands and knees when he looked up at the boy speaking. He noticed the first one who spoke was some kid named Nick who moved in not too long ago and the guy who just spoke was his friend John.

"I-I d-didn't make a-anything u-up." Logan was barely able to speak passed the shivers coursing through his body. It felt like they had stuck him in the freezer. Logan wished he hadn't thought that when Nick picked him up and threw him over his shoulder.

"Well looks like you still need to cool off." Logan tried struggling but he just didn't have the energy.

"Put me down!"

"Ok." Logan found himself being thrown to the hard cold floor. He rolled on his back groaning in pain. Logan opened his eyes realizing he was in the freezer. He looked toward the door wide eyed to see that there was a group standing behind Nick laughing. Logan scrambled to his feet but ended up slamming straight into the now closed door. Logan pulled on the handle but it didn't budge. He pulled with all his might but found that it wasn't going to move. Logan gave up on pulling and started banging on the door.

"HELP! SOMEONE PLEASE! LET ME OUT OF HERE!" Logan continued to bang but after 45 minutes he realized no one would come. Logan turned and slide down the door wrapping his arms around his freezing body. He wouldn't have been this cold if he was dry but of course he was wet. In desperation Logan took out his phone hoping it wasn't broken. He smiled slightly when it turned on but the screen was blinking; he didn't know how much time he had. Logan didn't have enough time to go through his contact list he called the first name he could get to and it happened to be Camille. After three rings she picked up.

"_Hello?"_

"C-C-Camille."

"_Logan? What's wrong? Why do you sound like that?"_

"P-please… I…. I'm locked i-in the f-f-freezer." Logan swallowed hard. "i-i-i-it's so c-c-cold." Logan heard Camille gasp and start to say something before the line went dead. Logan wrapped his arms around himself trying to stay warm. After about 15 minutes the door burst open and Camille and Stephanie were standing there with a large blanket. Camille bent down and quickly wrapped it around him. Camille and Stephanie started rubbing Logan's arms and back trying to warm him.

"Logan what happened? How did you get in here?" Stephanie exclaimed.

"I-I-I." Logan closed his mouth whimpering slightly. His lips were chattering and to Camille and Stephanie's horror his lips had a slight blue tint to them. Logan looked up when he heard multiple footsteps running toward him. Jo was the first to appear with another large blanket. James, Carlos, and Kendall appeared next. Jo bent down and wrapped the blanked around Logan as Kendall bent down in front of Logan.

"Logan, what happened?" Logan opened his mouth but he couldn't get any words out. After a few attempts he was finally able to speak.

"I'm s-s-so c-c-cold."

"Kendall we have to get him out of here." Camille exclaimed. Kendall swiftly lifted Logan up and carried him to the elevators. No one noticed the slight smirks on three boy's faces. When they all reached the apartment Kendall brought Logan into their room and laid him on the bed.

"Carlos get me that floor heater from the hall closet." Carlos nodded and ran out of the room. He came back a few seconds later with a large plug in heater. Once he turned it on he pointed it so it blew directly on Logan. James ran over to Logan's draw and pulled out more clothes. The three girls that had followed them quickly got the message and walked out into the hall. Kendall unwrapped Logan while James helped him get Logan's clothes off. Logan was shaking still as James, Carlos, and Kendall quickly dressed him in dry clothes. They removed the wet blankets and pulled the covers over Logan. After a few minutes Logan's shaking had stopped but his teeth were still chattering. Kendall climbed into bed and got under the covers. He slightly flinched at the feel of Logan's cold skin but when he wrapped himself around Logan he found his skin was starting to heat up quicker. Logan buried himself into Kendall's chest sighing into the wonderfully warm skin. After another ten minutes Logan's body temperature seemed to be back to normal. Kendall, James, and Carlos sighed in relief when they realized Logan was no longer shaking. The silence was broken when there was a knock on the bedroom door. James stood up from the bed and opened it revealing Camille, Jo and Stephanie. They walked in, Jo holding something in her hand. Logan sat up as soon as he realized what they were holding.

"I know it's all wet but I figured you might still want it." Jo said sadly. "We always see you reading it so I thought maybe it meant something to you." Logan nodded and reached his hand out. Jo walked over and placed the drenched book in Logan's hands. Logan looked down at the book then looked back up at Jo.

"Thank you." Jo smiled before walking back out with Camille and Stephanie. James walked them to the front door and scurried back to the room as soon as they were gone. Logan was staring down at the ruined book. He touched the cover and ran his fingers over it, stopping when the cover started to rip.

"The Lord of the Ring, this was always my favorite book." Logan swallowed hard trying to stop the tears that threatened to fall. Kendall was sitting up rubbing Logan's back as Logan started crying silently. "My dad gave me this book." Kendall took the book out of Logan's hands and gave it to Carlos. Without needing to tell him what to do Carlos instantly took it and placed it on the nightstand. He turned the fan so it was blowing directly on the book. Kendall turned back to Logan when Carlos was done.

"Can you tell me what happened now?" Logan sighed and nodded.

"I was tired of staying in the apartment so I went down to the pool. Everything seemed ok, I talked to the girls for a while and once they left I went back to reading. I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I knew water was being dumped on me. They dumped buckets of freezing water on me then the flipped my chair so I fell off. Before I could get up they dumped more water on me then they carried me over to the freezer and threw me in." A single tear slide down Logan's face as he told his friends what happened. Kendall wiped the tear away and pulled Logan into a kiss. Kendall stood up and paced the room with his fists clenched.

"They are not gunna get away with this." Kendall turned to Logan and pointed at him. "Nobody does that to you. Who was it Logan? Give me there names, I'll go down there right now and shove my fist right up there…"

"No Kendall." Kendall relaxed at the sound of Logan's voice. "If you go down there you won't solve anything. You'll just give them another reason to hate me." Kendall sighed and sat back down. Kendall cupped Logan's cheek and smiled at him.

"Fine I won't kill them but that doesn't mean I won't talk to them."

"Kendall…"

"I'll bring Carlos and James with me. They can make sure I won't do anything." Carlos and James nodded vigorously. Logan sighed giving in.

"Ok, it was Nick and his two friends." Kendall nodded and stood up.

"We'll be right back." Kendall walked off with James and Carlos right behind him. They stayed quiet until they stopped in the elevator.

"You're going to kick the crap out of them aren't you?" James said with a smirk. Kendall didn't turn to James but both James and Carlos could see the smirk on his face.

"Yep." When the elevator opened Kendall headed straight for Nick and his friends. People watched as Kendall walked passed them. They all looked nervous seeming to know what was about to go down. When Kendall reached Nick he grabbed him by the collar and pulled him so they were face to face.

"You think you're funny huh? You think messing with Logan is funny? What the fuck do you think is your problem? He could have died you know!" The whole pool went silent when they noticed the altercation. Nick was staring at Kendall wide eyed still not fully registering what was going on. After a moment Nick shook Kendall off him and took a step back.

"Calm down Knight, he's fine. You're acting like he's already dead. Besides, the lying bastard deserved it." Kendall punched Nick straight in the jaw making him fall to the ground. He pulled him up by the collar and looked him right in the eyes.

"Logan isn't lying!" Kendall let go of Nick as he stumbled back barely being caught by his friends. Kendall turned and walked a few steps so he was near the center of the pool area. "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU! JUST BECAUSE YOU SEE ONE VIDEO YOU THINK THAT LOGAN'S A LIER! WHAT MAKES YOU THINK RYAN'S SUCH A GOOD GUY? HUH! BECAUSE HE'S NICE! WELL GUESS WHAT, THAT'S WHAT THEY SAY WHEN IT COMES TO ALL ABUSERS! THAT'S HOW THEY GET AWAY WITH IT! NONE OF YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO JUDGE LOGAN! NONE OF YOU SAW HOW HE WAS AFTER THAT DAY AND NONE OF YOU WERE THEY'RE WHEN RYAN BROKE INTO OUR APARTMENT AND SHOT HIM!" Kendall pointed to himself, James and Carlos. "WE WERE THERE. WE WATCHED AS LOGAN FOUGHT TO GET THE GUN AWAY FROM RYAN WHEN HE TRIED TO SHOT MY SISTER!" everyone gasped, they hadn't heard about that. Kendall smirked and lowered his voice. "Yea, that's right. Your supposed gentlemen tried to kill a ten year old girl. You still think he's a good guy." Without another word Kendall left the pool. As he walked past the crowd he couldn't help but noticed the shocked and guilty faces. When Kendall reached the elevator he leaned against the wall and sighed. He barely noticed James and Carlos coming in after him.

"I don't think they will doubt Logan anymore. Kendall turned towards Carlos with a smile.

"Good."

**A/N: YEY! I went from not having any idea what to write to this. I think it turned out pretty well. =]**

**There's more to come.**


	21. eye for an eye

Carlos walked into the living carrying yet another bouquet of flowers. The whole apartment seemed to be overflowing with flowers, cards, balloons and other things that all were addressed to Logan. The kids around the Palm Woods defiantly felt bad for how they treated Logan but no amount of gifts could get Kendall, James or Carlos to forgive them. Logan however was ecstatic. Logan was usually embarrassed by lots of attention but walking into a room that was filled to the brim with gifts had always been a small fantasy to him. It was like something out of a movie. The girl walks into the room to find hundreds of gifts from their special someone. The gifts may not have all been from one person but they still made him feel special.

"Who's that from?" Logan questioned. Carlos put the flowers down and pulled out the card. He eyed it for a second then a smirk came to his face.

"It says it's from Nick's sister." Logan's brow furrowed in curiosity.

"What does it say?"

"It says… I heard about what my brother did and I would like to apologize. I know the flowers won't do much but I thought you might like them. If you ever need anything don't hesitate to ask. Nick will be coming by at some point to give you a five page written apology stating why he is an ass and that he is sorry." Everyone chuckled before Carlos continued. "P.S. I thought you might like to know that as a punishment…" Carlos' eyes widened and he started laughing historically. Kendall, James, and Logan eyed him weirdly while Carlos tried to regain his composer.

"Carlos, spit it out." James said frustrated.

"As a punishment I stuck Nick in the freezer for an hour and a half. Trust me when I say he is very sorry." Kendall and James laughed once Carlos finished reading. He placed the card on the counter and joined his friends on the couch.

"Wow, Nick may be a jerk but his older sister is cool. We should hang out with her one day." The other three boys nodded in agreement. "You didn't even really need to punch him Kendall." James threw his hand over his mouth realizing what he said. They never did tell Logan that Kendall punched him.

"James!" Kendall hissed out. Kendall turned to Logan who was staring at him.

"heh… Logan… I uh…"

"You punched him? Kendall! You promised you wouldn't hit anyone." Logan pulled out of Kendall's embrace so he could glare at him. Kendall was smiling sheepishly at Logan.

"I know, but it helped get my point across." Logan rolled his eyes and huffed. He stood up and walked over to his and Kendall's room.

"That's not the point Kendall." Kendall slid down in his chair and sighed loudly. He looked up at James and glared at him.

"Thanks supposed best friend." James smiled sheepishly at Kendall and let out an awkward laugh.

"Sorry about that buddy." Kendall rolled his eyes and got up from the couch. He walked into his and Logan's room closing the door behind him. Kendall looked around realizing Logan was no were to be seen.

"Logan?" Kendall let out a yelp as he was tackled to the ground. He was stunned for a moment but he was brought back into reality when lips crashed against his. Logan was straddling Kendall's hips while he vigorously kissed him. Kendall gripped Logan's hips as the kiss became more heated. He forced his tongue into Logan's mouth forcing a moan from him. Logan traced his fingers down Kendall's chest until he found the hem. He ran his hands under Kendall's shirt drinking in the moans coming from Kendall. After another minute of the intense make out session Logan pulled away from Kendall.

"What took you so long Kendall? I would have thought you would have come in right after me." Kendall brow furrowed in confusion.

"I thought you were mad at me." Logan smirked and leaned down quickly kissing Kendall's lips.

"I'm a little annoyed that you didn't do what I asked but I can't stay mad at you. If it weren't for you everyone would still hate me." Logan pulled his hands out of Kendall's shirt and moved them back up to Kendall's shoulders. He gripped Kendall's shoulders keeping him steady as he leaned down until his lips were right next to Kendall's ear. "Also… I can't help but find you're over protectiveness really… really… sexy." Kendall moaned at the quiet purr of Logan's voice. Kendall moved his hands from Logan's hips to his ass and gripped the cheeks harshly. He forced Logan's lower half down while he ground his body into Logan. Logan moaned and reattached his lips to Kendall's. Just as the kiss started to become more heated the bedroom door suddenly opened. Logan and Kendall looked up to see James and Carlos staring down at them.

"Uh… did we interrupt something?" Carlos looked from Kendall to Logan to James as he stood at the door awkwardly. Logan brushed a bright shade of red as he took in the current situation.

"W-We weren't doing anything!" He squeaked out quickly. "We uh… tripped." James and Carlos looked at him with raised eyebrows and smirks. James chuckled a little and started to turn to leave.

"So Kendall's gripping your ass cause he slipped?" Logan's blush grew when he looked down to see that Kendall still had a firm grip on his butt. He squeaked in embarrassment and quickly stood up.

"Well anyway, there's someone at the door for you." Logan furrowed his eyebrows at Carlos and walked out to the living room. When he reached the front door and opened it Nick was awkwardly standing in the hallway.

"Hey Nick what's up?" Nick kept his eyes on his shoes and sighed.

"I'm sorry Logan. I shouldn't have treated you like that." Nick finally looked up at Logan. "It's just… Ryan was my friend and I guess I didn't want to believe that he would do anything wrong. That's no excuse though; I shouldn't have been so cruel. I know you probably won't forgive me but I'm still sorry." Nick had gone back to looking at his shoes. He was waiting for the verbal abuse that he believed would come. When nothing happened he looked back up to see Logan smiling at him.

"It's ok Nick I forgive you. I just hope that we can be friends?" Nick smiled at Logan and nodded his head.

"Yea totally! If you ever need anything don't hesitate to ask!" Nick was about to leave when he stopped. "Oh! I almost forgot!" Nick handed Logan a small wrapped box. "This is for you. I hope you like it." Logan waved goodbye to Nick and closed the door. He walked back into the living room staring at the gift Nick had given him. He turned it over in his hands and threw it up once trying to figure out what it was.

"You're too forgiving Logan." Logan looked up to see Kendall staring at him. He was leaning against the dome hockey table and he had obviously heard the whole encounter. Logan shrugged his shoulders while still looking at the box.

"He's sorry, that's all that matters." Logan tore off the wrapping paper to reveal a white box. He opened the lid to find a note on the very top.

"I heard you liked this book and that your copy was ruined. I hope you like this, it's signed." Logan's eyes were furrowed as he looked into the box to find a copy of the Lord of the Rings. He pulled it out of the box and examined it for a moment. It was in perfect condition and it seemed to be an older version of the book. Most copies today have the characters from the movie on them. When Logan glanced down at the bottom of the cover his eyes almost bugged out of his head.

"No way!" Logan yelled excitedly. Kendall, James and Carlos ran over to him thinking that something was wrong.

"Logan what is it?" Logan turned the book so his friends could see it. He was bouncing on his feet as he pointed to a signature.

"That's Tolkien's signature! He signed the book! Can you believe it?" Logan's excitement faded a little when he noticed his friend's confused faces. He dropped his hands to his sides and sighed with frustration. "J.R.R. Tolkien is the author who wrote the Lord of the Rings. His three friends made simultaneous "Oh" sounds in understanding.

"That's cool I guess but no need to freak out Logan. I'm sure you could get his signature at any time." Logan looked at Carlos like he had five heads.

"Uh no I can't because Tolkien is dead; do you not realize how old this copy must be? It's probably one of the originals." Logan looked back at the book with a huge smile on his face.

"Cool. Can I see?" Logan slapped Carlos' hand away and pulled the book to his chest. Carlos pulled his hand to his chest and looked to both James and Kendall as he mouthed the word "Ow."

"No you cannot see it. I have to make sure it stays in perfect condition." Logan ran to his room and shut the door behind him. Carlos was still holding his hand as he went over to the couch and sat down. James and Kendall gave each other looks of amusement as they joined him.

"Logan can be such a nerd sometimes." James laughed.

"Yea but he's my nerd." Kendall added. James and Carlos both aw'd causing Kendall to playfully punch them. The playful punches soon turned into a playful scuffle which turned into a full out wrestling match. The three boys were rolling on the floor when the phone rang.

"LOGAN GET THE PHONE!" The three boys yelled as they each tried to beat each other up. Logan ran out of his room and towards the phone.

"Alright, alright jeez." Logan picked up the phone hearing a familiar voice on the other end. "Hello Ms. Fin how can I help you?" Logan's smile dropped as soon as Ms. Fin started talking. "What do you mean? Do you know what it is?" Kendall, James, and Carlos stopped wrestling and were slowly making their way over to Logan. "How long do we have now? T-tomorrow?" Logan swallowed and ran his hand through his hair. "Y-yea I should be ready. What time? Ok, bye." Logan hung up the phone and let out a sigh. Kendall, James, and Carlos were staring at him waiting for him to say something.

"Well?" The three boys said in unison. Logan turned to them a hint of fear and doubt in his eyes.

"The trial is tomorrow." The three boys nodded still confused.

"Ok, that's not the end of the world right? I mean it was supposed to have passed already…" Kendall stopped speaking when he noticed Logan still looked nervous.

"They moved the date again because Ryan's lawyer supposedly found something that will change everything." Logan sighed and leaned against the counter top. "Ms. Fin has no idea what it is but the rumors going around her office say it's big. "Logan turned to Kendall with sad eyes. "We could lose." Kendall, James and Carlos sighed. They each placed a hand on Logan's back trying to reassure him.

"Don't worry Logan those are just rumors." James explained.

"Yea and nothing can change the truth." Carlos added.

"You'll be fine Logan." Kendall linked his hand with Logan's and gave a reassuring squeeze. Logan looked up at his friends with a small smile.

"You guys are right."

**A/N: alright this chapter kinda sucked. But whatever. And don't ask me what Ryan's got up his sleeve cause…. I don't know yet lol. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed and**

**There is more to come.**


	22. lets begin

**A/N: OH SNAP! 100 reviews! That's awesome! Thanks so much you guys rock. Anyway! On to the chapter!**

"Carlos… what are you doing?" Logan was giving Carlos a weird look as he watched his friend struggling in front of the mirror. Carlos had a neck tie around his head and he somehow managed to get his left arm stuck under it as well. Carlos stopped struggling and turned to Logan. He grinned sheepishly at him and blushed slightly.

"Trying to put on my tie." Logan sighed and walked over to his friend. After a few minutes of pulling and struggling he managed to free Carlos' arm and head. Logan removed his own tie and clipped it into place on Carlos.

"This is why clip on ties were invented." Carlos smiled at Logan who was taking his tie and expertly tying it on himself.

"Thanks Logan." Logan smiled before turning to leave but he stopped when he felt a hand on his arm. Logan looked down seeing Carlos' hand gripping him. He looked up to see Carlos' concerned face. "How are you doing Logan? Are you ready for today?" Logan sighed and gave Carlos a weak smile.

"I'm doing pretty well. I'm defiantly nervous but I know you guys will be there for me." Carlos smiled and ruffled Logan's hair. They walked into the living room laughing when they noticed Kendall leaning against the bathroom door.

"James come on! I didn't mean it, you look fine!" Logan and Carlos looked to each other then walked over to Kendall.

"Kendall?" Kendall glanced over to see Logan staring at him. "What's going on?" Kendall sighed and banged his head against the door.

"James asked me how he looked and he says I hesitated but I DIDN'T!" Kendall yelled the end so James could hear him through the door.

"YES YOU DID!" Kendall sighed after hearing James voice through the door. Logan moved Kendall out of the way and knocked on the door.

"James, can I see?" Logan heard a sigh and stepped back as the door opened. James looking at Logan expectantly while still holding the door knob so he could close the door again if he needed. Logan looked James up and down quickly and smiled. "James you look fine… better than I could ever wish to look." James smiled at the compliment but frowned at Logan bashing himself.

"Logan don't say that you look good too." Logan smiled at James and pulled him out of the bathroom.

"Well, now that we both agree that we both look good we can leave." James laughed and let Logan pull him out the front door.

* * *

Logan was pacing back and forth as they waited for the trial to start. Ms. Fin, James, and Carlos (Kendall was in the bathroom at the moment) were sitting outside with Logan while everyone else was inside. This included Kelly, Gustavo, Katie, Mrs. Knight, Dr. Trager, Dr. Wells, and a lot of the kids from the Palm Woods.

"Logan calm down your going to be fine." James said for the tenth time. Logan stopped pacing and faced his friends.

"I know… I know I'm just… nervous." Logan started pacing again and started the bite the nail of his thumb. James sighed and stood in front of Logan.

"Listen, everything is going to be fine." James spoke as calmly and slowly as he possibly could. "You just have to go in there and tell them what happened and you've already done that at least five times by now." Logan nodded while taking in a deep breath. "And remember, Carlos is here for you, I'm here for you, and for god's sake the whole Palm Woods is here for you.

"And don't forget about Kendall." Carlos added. Logan breathed out feeling some of his nerves disappearing. The thought that his friends were here for him helped but what helped the most was knowing Kendall was there for him. All he needed was to here Kendall's name and a little more of him felt like everything would be ok. (1)

"Why don't you want to forget about me?" Logan turned to see Kendall walking back over with a confused smirk. Logan sighed feeling even more relief at the site of Kendall. Logan walked over to Kendall with a bright smile and hugged him tightly. He buried his face in Kendall's chest and breathed in deeply. Logan smiled as Kendall's sent seemed to make the rest of Logan's nerves fall away.

"You smell good." Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan's waist pulling him close. He smiled down at Logan when Logan finally looked up at him.

"Thanks, you smell good too." Kendall laughed. Logan laughed quietly and laid his head back against Kendall's chest. Logan pulled away from Kendall when he heard the sound of a door opening. A short old woman walked out holding a clipboard.

"Logan Mitchell?" Logan sighed and started walking toward the door. Before they were inside he gripped Kendall's hand and turned to him.

"Tell me everything is going to be ok." Kendall cupped Logan's cheek and kissed the tip of his nose softly.

"Everything is going to be fine." Logan nodded and walked into the court room. The room seemed like something out of a movie. Everyone Logan knew was sitting behind were he and Ryan sat, the jury sat off to the side watching as he came in, and the judge sat at a high desk at the very front of the room. Logan squeezed Kendall's hand one more time before they were forced to part. Kendall, James, and Carlos took the seats at the very front behind Logan will Logan and Ms. Fin sat at the other side of a wood barrier. Logan spared a glance to the defendant's table instantly regretting it. Ryan was glaring at him. When their eyes met Ryan's frown turned into a cocky smile. He made a kissy face at Logan laughing silently as Logan turned away with fear. Logan looked up when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Ms. Fin was looking at him sympathetically.

"Don't worry Logan, he can't hurt you here." Logan took in another breath and faced forward, refusing to look at Ryan anymore. Logan glanced over to his left when he noticed two security guards walking over. They each took a spot in front of the judge's table facing everyone in the court room.

"All rise for the honorable judge Mathews." Everyone stood up as a tall man walked in. Logan was surprised to find that the judge was a young attractive man. He expected him to be old and fat. The judge eyed everyone in the room as he made his way over to his desk. As soon as he sat down everyone else did the same. Once the judge was settled he folded his hands and let out a sigh.

"Ryan Chester vs. Logan Mitchell. Let's begin."

**A/N: and that is it! I know it was short but I wanted to wait until the next chapter to do the trial especial since I still don't know what I'm going to do for Ryan's defense but I'm starting to get an idea. =]**

**There's more to come!**

**(1): I had a dream not too long ago that was kind of like an epiphany. I always wondered what it would feel like to find "the one" but in the dream it was basically that I would know when all I needed was to hear their name and I would feel at peace and that all my fears would just go away. Although the dream was about me having Ryan Reynolds baby so I could be wrong lol.**


	23. the trial

"Ryan Chester Vs. Logan Mitchell. Mary Jay Fin you may begin." Mary Jay nodded and walked to the center of the floor.

"I would like to begin with the taped testimony of Logan Mitchell. Please turn to the projection screen." Everyone turned to view a drop down projection screen on the left side of the room. Ms. Fin pressed the play button on her laptop and an image of Logan, James, Kendall, Carlos, and Ryan's lawyer popped onto the screen.

_"Mr. Mitchell you believe my client assaulted you is that correct."_

_"Yes."_

_"Can you tell me everything you believe he did?" Logan explained everything that happened in as much detail as he could. From the beginning all the way up to when Ryan started calling and when he showed up at the apartment. Mrs. Stewart looked down at her notes then looked at Logan again. "Isn't it correct that you are in Therapy for unstable emotions?" Logan took in a breath then glanced up at everyone. They were all giving him reassuring looks. He looked at his lap and took in another deep breath before speaking._

_"Yes but that tends to happen when your assaulted." Kendall squeezed Logan's hand. Logan didn't need to see Kendall's face to know he was smirking. Logan glanced over at Ms. Fin who was smirking as well and gave him thumbs up. Logan looked back at Mrs. Stewart who was frowning at him._

_"Normally I would say you were right Mr. Mitchell but you grew up in quit an unstable environment, is that correct?_

_"Yes."_

_"You had to take medication because of that unstable environment?"_

_"Yes."_

_"And you are taking medication now, correct." Logan swallowed hard._

_"Yes."_

_"Couldn't it be said then that your unstable emotions caused you to over react to situations that involved my client. Couldn't it be said that you were never assaulted?" Logan wasn't sure how to respond. This final statement could change everything. He had been able to keep calm so far but what if he messed up? What if he said something and it was thrown back in his face again. Logan stayed quiet for a moment trying to think of what to say when he thought back to that day. He thought about everything and he realized something. He looked up at Mrs. Stewart with determination._

_"Having a bad passed, being in therapy, and taking medication doesn't affect my memory. Ryan assaulted me. He hit me on numerous occasions; he raped me, and shot me. That's the truth whether people want to believe it or not."_

The projection screen rolled back into the ceiling as Ms. Fin walked back over to the middle of the floor.

"Now that we have a basic understand of the situation I would like to call my first witness to the stand." The judge waved her the go ahead and Ms. Fin turned to the audience. "Would Dr. Wells please step forward?" Dr. Wells got up from his seat with a small file in hand. He gave Logan a reassuring smile and took a seat next to the judge. After going through the usual speech about telling the truth Ms. Fin approached him. "Dr. Wells when was the first time you met Logan Mitchell?"

"The first encounter I had with Logan was when he was admitted to the hospital with serious injuries." Ms. Fin nodded in understanding and started pacing through the room.

"What injuries did Logan sustain?"

"Logan sustained multiple bruises to his arms, shoulders, legs and mid-section. He also had several lacerations and a badly bruised wrist." Ms. Fin turned to Dr. Wells and approached him again.

"What else did you find when you first examined Logan?" Dr. Wells sighed and looked down.

"After using a rape kit we determined that Logan had been raped based on multiple lacerations and semen located in the rectum." (A/N: awkward…)

"What about your interaction with Logan Mitchell?" Dr. Wells glanced over to Logan quickly before looking back to Ms. Fin.

"He seemed very shaken. It took some convincing to get him to allow us to do the rape test and he wasn't willing to do it with any males in the room." Ms. Fin smiled at Dr. Wells.

"Thank you doctor." Ms. Fin walked back towards where Logan was sitting. "I have no further questions." The judge nodded and waved to Mrs. Stewart allowing her to go. She stood up and leisurely walked towards Dr. Wells.

"Dr. Wells, how many years of medical experience do you possess?" Dr. Wells hesitated seeming to be thrown off by the question.

"I've been practicing for 5 years." Mrs. Stewart made a noise of recognition then faced away from him.

"Only five years, that would make you a pretty inexperienced doctor, do you agree?" Dr. Wells swallowed hard.

"5 years has given me enough experience to know an assault victim when I see one." Mrs. Stewart turned back toward Dr. Wells.

"You may think so but isn't there a small chance that those injuries we self inflicted?" Dr. Wells furrowed his eyebrows.

"I'm sorry; I don't quite understand your question.

"Well Dr. Wells, bruises… cuts… these seem like the type of injuries that a person could easier inflict on their own. Wouldn't you agree?" Dr. Wells sighed, he knew this wasn't right but he had to answer truthfully.

"Yes."

"And considering that you have only had 5 years of medical experience isn't there a chance that you misinterpreted how Mr. Mitchell received these injuries."

"I suppose so." Mrs. Stewart smiled and walked back over to Ryan.

"No further questions your honor." The judge nodded and waved at Ms. Fin.

"Ms. Fin please call your next witness." She stood up and walked to the center of the floor.

"Yes, I call Dr. Trager to the stand." Dr. Trager stood up with a small folder and walked over to the stand. After she sat down Ms. Fin approached her. "Dr. Trager is this your first time dealing with someone who claims they have been raped?"

"No."

"Does Logan possess the typical signs of someone who has been raped?"

"Yes." Ms. Fin turned to Dr. Trager with furrowed eyebrows.

"Why do you say that?"

"When I first met Logan he was very fearful of me. He didn't want to talk about anything that happened to him because he was afraid of reliving the memory. It was clear that he was keeping to himself more and there was an aspect of him trying to regain the innocence that he lost."

"What do you mean when you said he was trying to regain his innocence?" Dr. Trager cleared her throat before continuing.

"With most rape victims they feel their innocence has been taken away from them. In those types of situations that person responds well to someone who talks calmly and quietly to them; like they were a child." Ms. Fin crossed her arms across her chest.

"And Logan responded to this?"

"Yes. During the first session I had with Logan he was reluctant to go to my office and talk so I knelt down beside him and asked him about him. After a short time Logan opened up more." Ms. Fin smiled and walked back over to Logan.

"No more further questions." The judge turned to Ryan's lawyer who didn't move from her seat.

"I have no questions at this time." Logan furrowed his eyebrows and looked over towards Ryan's side of the room. He had expected Mrs. Stewart to hammer Dr. Trager with questions about his mental health but she wasn't. What was going on? The judge nodded and waited for Dr. Trager to take her seat before continuing.

"Mrs. Stewart you may supply your defense." She nodded and stood up. She walked over to the center of the room and pressed a small remote. The projection screen came down from the ceiling again and Logan cringed knowing what video she would be playing.

"I would now like to play for the court my clients testimony."

_"Mr. Chester, can you explain to me what happened between you and Logan Mitchell?" Ryan scoffed and looked to Mary Jay seriously._

_"Yea, I met Logan when he was sitting by the pool. He was all by himself looking bored. I wanted to be a nice guy and talked to him. After we started dating a realized what kind of person he is. He's a total prude. There would be times when I would brush against him and he would flip out saying I was trying to pressure him. And then the day in the lobby he was coming on to me. I tried to stop him because I mean come on we were in public but he just wasn't having it. When I wouldn't give in he pushed me and that's when he fell into the wall. He started screaming and crying and saying I threw him. He was going crazy. I think he's like bipolar or something."_

_"You think my client is mentally unstable?" Ryan scoffed again and leaned forward._

_"Well yea, everyone thinks it. He freaks out over the smallest things, he freaks out when someone touches him, and he freaks out when he doesn't get his way. The guy doesn't have control over his emotions. I mean first he breaks up with me then he comes running into my apartment begging for me to take him back. We ended up having sex and right after we were done he started freaking out. I tried to calm him down but he just wouldn't have it. He threw himself around and fell over things. And then he fell down the stairs." Ryan looked up and sighed annoyed. "Just because he regrets having sex doesn't mean he can accuse me of raping him. He's mentally unstable and his three friends just fuel his emotional issues. I feel sorry for him. I mean he even shot himself!" Ryan pointed to himself with a look of disbelief. "I'm the victim here. I shouldn't go to jail because of him." _

Mrs. Stewart walked back to the center of the floor as the screen went up.

"As you can see my client remembers the events between my client and Mr. Mitchell differently." She walked over to her table and grabbed a folder and a small plastic bag. "I would like to present to the court with substantial evidence that will show my client's innocence but first I would like to call Logan Mitchell to the stand." Logan's eyes widened when he heard his name. He thought the video was the only testimony he would have to give, why was he being called to the stand now? Logan slowly stood up and made his way over to the stand. All the fear and doubt seemed to crash onto him as he looked around the room. Logan felt like he was about to explode until he spotted James, Carlos and Kendall. They were all staring at him with worry but he could tell that they were silently cheering him on as well. Logan took in a deep breath and looked over to Mrs. Stewart who was just starting to open the plastic bag. Logan's brow furrowed in confusion when Mrs. Stewart pulled out a shirt. The front of it was covered with blood and the back of it looked like someone had taken scissors to it. On closer inspection Logan also noticed a small hole and some black speckles on it. After another moment of scrutinizing the shirt Logan realized something; that was his shirt. "Logan do you recognize this shirt?"

"Yes. That's mine." Mrs. Stewart nodded her head.

"This was the shirt you wore the day you were shot… is that correct." Logan nodded still confused.

"Yes." Mrs. Stewart walked over to her table and pressed a remote. The projection screen came back down revealing pictures of the shirt. She placed the shirt back in the bag and walked over to the pictures.

"Logan how exactly do you believe you were shot?"

"Ryan came to our apartment with a gun and when he tried to shoot Katie I went for the gun. He was able to push me away from him and before my friends could get the gun away from Ryan he shot me."

"How far away from Ryan were you when he shot you?" Logan hesitated for a moment thinking about the question.

"Five of six feet." A smile came to Mrs. Stewarts face as she turned back towards Lagan.

"Is that so? I would like everyone to look at these pictures for a moment." Mrs. Stewart gestured to the screen. "As you can see the shirt was damaged in the back from the hospital trip but the most important part is still there." She blew up a picture so it was larger than the other's. Mrs. Stewart pointed a remote to the screen causing small circles to appear around certain areas of the shirt. "In these circles are black dots. These dots are actually gun powder residue, which could only have gotten on the shirt if the gun was fired from point blank." Mrs. Stewart walked away from the screen and back towards Logan. "Now Logan, if you were that far away from my client when he shot you how do you explain the gun powder residue on your shirt?" Logan's mouth went dry and his mind went blank. He had looked though enough forensic books to know what she was talking about but it just didn't add up. How did the powder get on his shirt? Mrs. Stewart turned away from Logan with a smirk on her face. She knew he couldn't answer. "I think your silence is answer enough. I have no more further questions." Logan went back over to his seat and slid down low in it. He was beyond confused and the silent murmurs around him weren't helping. Logan jumped when he heard a large bang. Logan looked up to the judge who was holding his mallet.

"We will recess until the jury has come to a decision." Logan waited for most of the room to clear before making his way to the exit. He didn't stop walking until he found himself outside in a courtyard. Logan paced back and forth breathing heavily as he felt the sting of tears. He was about to start freaking out until he felt someone grab him and pull him into an embrace. Logan immediately recognized Kendall's scent but even that couldn't calm him down right now. Logan tried to pull away but Kendall held on tightly.

"Kendall let go." Kendall didn't acknowledge Logan's futile attempts at freedom.

"Not until you calm down." Logan stopped for a moment and looked up at Kendall. Kendall seemed to be staring into space as Logan continued to stare at him. Logan's brow furrowed and a frown came to his face.

"Calm down… calm down! How am I supposed to calm down after what just happened! She blindsided me Kendall! I was so confused I didn't know what to say and I panicked!" Kendall moved his arms from around Logan and gripped his shoulders. Kendall bent down slightly so he was eye level with Logan and stared into his eyes.

"That wasn't a big deal. That's the only thing they have on their side and it doesn't even add up. You had Dr. Wells report and Dr. Trager. You are going to win this. Logan nodded finally feeling some relief come back to him. Kendall released Logan and smiled at him. "Ok, let's go get some lunch."

* * *

Logan was back in the court room awaiting the jury's verdict. It had been an hour and a half since they first started deliberating and they should be done any moment. Logan glanced over to Ryan's side to see that Ryan was staring into space. His jaw was clenched and his muscles were tense. Logan also couldn't help but notice a sense of defeat in Ryan's eyes. Logan turned away feeling a little better. Ryan thought he was going to lose. Logan watched as the jury finally made their way back into the court room. The room was completely silent as they each sat themselves down. Logan swallowed hard as the silence continued to stretch on. He didn't know how much more of this he could take. The judge turned to the jury staring at them.

"Has the jury reached a verdict?" A small woman stood up and faced the judge.

"Yes your honor. We the jury find the defendant Ryan Chester… Not guilty."

**A/N: SAY WHAT! lol well... i guess there is not much to say but DONT KILL ME! **

**there's more to come**


	24. noticing something you didn't see before

The court room was in a state of chaos. People we're yelling, screaming, and cursing about how wrong this situation was. To the people there for Logan, it didn't make any sense and even the people there for Ryan couldn't help but glance between each other with confused faces. The judge was banging his mallet in a futile attempt to get everyone to settle down but it did little good. The only person who seemed to be ignoring it was Logan. Logan was staring at his lap wide eyed. The sounds and voices around him were muffled as the true horrors of the situation came crashing down on him. Logan didn't notice when Ms. Fin tried to get his attention and he didn't notice when Kendall, Carlos and James came over and tried snapping him out of whatever trance he was in. Logan just kept his eyes down staring into space. Logan felt tears spring to his eyes and his chest tightened. He found that he was gasping for breath as all of his functions shut down. He laid his head down on the table and hugged his head as he began to sob.

"This can't be happening." Kendall pulled up a chair next to Logan and hugged his head. He tried to calm him down but the loud sobs just kept coming. Ms. Fin walked over the judge's desk and Kendall could barely register what was being said over the loud protest in the audience.

"This is ridiculous!" The judge replied to Ms. Fin but Kendall couldn't make out what he was saying. Kendall strained to hear more but all he could really see was Ms. Fin moving her arms around in anger as the judge watched her. "Her evidence is full of holes and you know it! Do you honestly believe that boy would be crying like that if he wasn't telling the truth?" Kendall wasn't sure if that was what Ms. Fin had actually said but when the judge glanced over he knew it must have been.

"Oh god… t-this can't be h-happening!" Kendall snapped out of his thoughts at the sound of Logan's voice. Kendall tightened his grip on Logan trying as hard as he could to comfort him. Kendall glanced back towards the judge to see that Ms. Fin was still yelling at him. Every time the judge glanced over in his direction he couldn't help but see sympathy in his eyes. The judge sighed heavily and slammed his mallet as hard as he could. Everyone in the room fell silent, startled by the sound.

"Everyone please remain calm. I believe it is necessary to extend this trial until a later date." The judge glanced down at Ms. Fin who was still standing in front of him. "I am giving the plaintiff until tomorrow to find more evidence and when we return the jury will reconsider their decision. Is that clear?" Everyone in the room nodded seeming to be somewhat pleased that the decision hadn't been made final. Logan finally pulled his arms away from his head and glanced around the room. He had heard the judge but that still didn't take away the pain he had felt when he heard the words "Not Guilty." Logan was scared, frustrated and beyond confused. It wasn't a good feeling and he defiantly didn't like it. Logan, Kendall, James, and Carlos stayed were they were as everyone else left. They wanted to give Logan more time to collect himself before he left. Out of the corner of his eye Logan spotted Ryan glaring at him. He probably celebrated as soon as he heard the verdict but now there was another chance that he could lose. Logan tore his eyes away from Ryan his breath hiccupping every so often.

"Logan, you ok?" Logan turned to James who was kneeling next to him with concern. Logan took in a deep breath and wiped the tears off his face.

"I-I think s-so." James nodded and stood up. He ruffled Logan's hair and grinned at Logan, who managed to grin back. The four boys walked out of the court room and started heading outside before Logan stopped.

"What's wrong Logan?" Kendall said with concern.

"I have to pee." Kendall sighed and laughed a little. He thought something was wrong.

"Ok I'll go with you." Logan placed a hand on Kendall's chest stopping him in his tracks.

"N-no Kendall wait… here." Kendall furrowed his brow in confusion.

"Logan if you're hiding something…" Logan rolled his eyes at Kendall.

"I'm not hiding anything it's just…" Logan looked around then leaned toward Kendall. "I can't pee with other people around. I kind of get… stage fright." Logan stepped away from Kendall with a big blush on his face. When he noticed Kendall was trying not to laugh he pouted at him. "Don't laugh at me!" Kendall chuckled and laid his arm over Logan's shoulder.

"Ok, ok I'll wait outside. Now hurry up." Kendall playfully pushed Logan towards the door laughing when he almost hit it. Logan walked into the bathroom noticing that no one was in there. He sighed with relief and went to take care of his business. When he was done he washed his hands. When Logan was convinced he had cleaned his hands enough he went to grab a paper towel when he noticed someone was holding one out for him. Logan sighed and went to turn to them.

"Kendall I told you…" Logan gasped stepping back when he realized who was standing in front of him.

"Need a towel?" Ryan hissed out sarcastically. Logan backed away slowly heading for the door. Once it was in his sight he made a mad dash for the door only to be pulled back and slammed against the wall.

"KEND…" Ryan threw his hand over Logan's mouth muffling his screams. Logan began to sob when he realized he couldn't get free.

"Aw don't cry little Logie. I'm not going to hurt you." Ryan leaned in and pressed all his weight against Logan. "Yet." Logan let another sob out as he shook with fear. "Now listen, I suggest you give up now because if you don't you'll regret it." The end of Ryan's statement came out as a low hiss. Logan closed his eyes and tried to get free again. Ryan laughed in Logan's face leaning back slightly so he could get a better look. Ryan's hand was still tightly gripping Logan's face as his tears slid over Ryan's hand. His eyes were filled with fear and his muscles were tense and shaking. Ryan wanted to take another moment to watch Logan but he pulled his hand back in pain when Logan bite him.

"KENDALL!"

"You son of a…" Ryan trailed off as he heard the door bang open. He turned to see Kendall run in then screech to a halt. Kendall's face was covered with concern but once he spotted Ryan his face morphed into pure dark rage. Kendall walked over to Ryan and stood so they were nose to nose. Ryan swallowed hard notice Kendall's dark eyes.

"Back. The fuck. Off." Kendall's tone was low and menacing. Ryan glared at Kendall but quickly made his exit. Before he was completely out of sight he turned to Logan and mouthed, "This isn't over." Logan shivered and wrapped his arms around himself. He had managed to crawl over to the sinks and get himself under them while Kendall confronted Ryan. Kendall's features softened as soon as he spotted Logan hiding under the sinks. He walked over and knelt down so he could see Logan. "Hey, he's gone. Can you come out now?" Kendall reached his hand out waiting for Logan to take it. Logan stared at Kendall's hand for a moment then took it. He crawled out from under the sinks and immediately wrapped his arms around Kendall's torso. Kendall sighed and squeezed Logan as tightly as he could.

"K-Kendall... can't… breathe!" Kendall's eyes widened and he released his grip on Logan. He bent down slightly and gripped Logan's shoulder's as Logan caught his breath.

"I'm sorry Logan. I didn't mean to." Logan sighed and smiled up at Kendall.

"Don't worry about it I'm fine." Kendall sighed with relief and gently kissed Logan's lips. Logan eyed Kendall for a moment. He was acting strange.

"Kendall… you ok?" Kendall nodded and sighed.

"I'm fine it's just… when I heard you scream I got so scarred. I don't ever want to lose you." Logan smiled and passionately kissed Kendall. When they pulled apart Logan leaned his head against Kendall's chest.

"I don't want to lose you either." Kendall and Logan made their way out of the bathroom to head back to the palm woods.

* * *

When they walked into the apartment Logan yawned loudly and rubbed his eyes sleepily.

"Man I'm tired. I'm going to take a nap." James and Carlos nodded and each walked into their room wanting a nap as well. Kendall looked around before heading over to his and Logan's room.

"If everyone is taking a nap I might as well too." Logan and Kendall walked into their room. Kendall closed the door and pulled Logan down onto his bed before Logan could get to his own bed. "Sleep with me." Logan smiled and cuddled up to Kendall. Logan took in a deep breath before instantly falling asleep.

_Logan sat up noticing he wasn't in Kendall's bed anymore. He looked around confused until he realized he was in Ryan's apartment. Logan swallowed hard and slowly stood up. Logan jumped slightly when he heard the front door swing open. His eyes widened when a familiar scene starting playing out in front of him._

"_Oh god not again." Logan whined out. Logan watched himself being pulled through Ryan's apartment to the bedroom. Logan didn't want to watch this again but he couldn't help but follow. He watched again from the door flinching every time he was hit. Logan turned away when Ryan threw him to the ground again. He couldn't watch this anymore. Before Logan could try and will himself awake he noticed something out of the corner of his eye. He walked over to the corner of the room trying to ignore the screams from behind him. When Logan reached Ryan's desk he couldn't help but notice a red light coming from behind it. Logan tilted his head slightly trying to get a better look but ended up kneeling on the floor. He looked behind the desk and what he saw truly shocked him. "That can't be possible."_

Logan shot up in bed gasping slightly. He looked around the room taking in his surroundings before calming down. He glanced to his side to see that his sudden movement had woken Kendall up. Kendall blinked a few times before staring at Logan with concern. Kendall sat up and took Logan's hand.

"Logan are you ok. Did you have a bad dream?" Logan stayed silent thinking for a moment. Was that dream real? He had to know. Logan shot out of bed and grabbed his cell phone. Kendal slowly stood up. "Logan what…"

"Shhh!" Logan waved his hand at Kendall as he held his phone to his ear. It rang a few times before Ms. Fin picked up.

"_Hello?"_

"Hey Ms. Fin this is Logan."

"_Oh Logan, what can I do for you?"_

"Well I was just wondering… since Ryan was able to get my shirt as evidence could we use something of his?" Ms. Fin was silent for a moment before speaking.

"_Yes we could. What did you have in mind?"_

"I just thought of something that could be important but we would need to go into Ryan's old apartment. Are we allowed to do that?"

"_Considering the circumstances Ryan's apartment is a crime scene so yes we could go in their without his permission."_ Logan nodded and took in a breath.

"How soon could we go?"

"_I'll be over there in 20 minutes."_ Logan said goodbye and hung up. He turned around to see Kendall staring at him.

"Are you going to tell me what's going on now?" Logan sat back down on the bed and let out a sigh.

"Ok. Well I had a dream about the rape again." Kendall sat down and took Logan's hand. "It wasn't just that though. I noticed something that I never saw before and if it was true and it wasn't just something I imagined in my dream it could help us a lot." Kendall nodded and stood up.

"Ok, let's get ready."

* * *

After getting the keys to Ryan's apartment from Bitters Kendall, James, Carlos, Logan, and Ms. Fin were standing in the middle of Ryan's apartment.

"All his stuff is gone." Carlos said while looking around. "What do expect to find." Logan started walking towards Ryan's room, everyone following behind him.

"Hopefully something good." Logan stopped at the door to Ryan's room and swallowed hard. So many bad things had happened here. Logan felt arms wrap around his waist and he felt lips on the back of his neck.

"Don't worry Logan I'm here with you." Logan took in a breath and walked into Ryan's room. Everyone watched as Logan knelt next to Ryan's desk and pulled out a black object.

"What is that?" Logan stood and turned to James.

"Hopefully something that will solve all our problems.

**A/N: and there's the end to another chapter. And see things are starting to look up so DON'T KILL ME! And remember if you kill me I can't finish the story and you'll never know what happens! Hehe… anyway!**

**There is more to come.**


	25. it's over

Logan once again found himself standing outside of the court room waiting to be called in. This time however, he wasn't pacing. He still had some nerves but he was completely confident that they would win this. Not only had they found something monumental in Ryan's apartment but Ms. Fin had something up her sleeve as well. Logan laced his fingers with Kendall's and looked up at him with a bright smile.

"I love you Kendall." Kendall smiled and pecked Logan on the lips. He leaned his chin against the top of Logan's head and sighed.

"I love you too. Are you worried at all?" Logan moved from under Kendall's chin and looked up at him.

"A little but I think I'll be ok." Kendall smiled and kissed Logan one more time. When they pulled apart the door to the court room opened.

"Logan Mitchell?" Logan sucked in a breath and walked in. He took his seat at the front of the room like he did last time and watched as the two security guards walked over again.

"All rise for the honorable judge Mathews." Everyone stood again as the judge walked in. He sat down and turned to where Logan and Ms. Fin were sitting.

"Ms. Fin, I trust you have some more evidence for us today." Ms. Fin nodded and walked to the center of the room.

"First I would like to call a witness to the stand. Dr. Walter please come forward." I tall older man stood up from the audience and walked over to the stand. Everyone watch with confusion as he took a seat. No one knew who he was, not even Logan. Ms. Fin walked towards Dr. Walter and crossed her arms. "Dr. Walter, can you please state your occupation." He nodded and took in a breath.

"I am a forensic scientist." Logan didn't miss when Ryan's lawyer flinched. Ms. Fin walked over to the projection screen as the picture of Logan's shirt popped up.

"Dr. Walter, when you look at this picture what do you see?" Dr. Walter examined the picture for a moment.

"There are obvious blood stains and a small whole from where the bullet entered."

"What about the gun powder. Based on your forensic knowledge… does it look right to you?" Dr. Walter shook his head.

"No, when gun powder lands on an object it's spotty but this looks blocky." Ms. Fin walked towards Dr. Walter again.

"What can you conclude from that?"

"It's obvious that the shirt was tampered with." Ms. Fin nodded and walked back over to Logan.

"Thank you I have no further questions." After Dr. Walter walked back to his seat the judge turned to Ms. Fin again.

"Do you have anything else to present to the court?" Ms. Fin glanced down at Logan and smiled.

"Yes I do. First I would like to call Ryan Chester to the stand." Ryan sat confused for a moment before standing up and walking over to the stand. He sat down and fixed himself before looking at Ms. Fin uninterestingly. Ms. Fin forced a smile before walking over to Ryan. She held a small bag in her hand.

"Mr. Chester." Ms. Fin opened the bag and held up what was in it for everyone to see. "Do you recognize this object?" Ryan furrowed his brow and pointed at the object.

"Yea, that's my answering machine… I thought I lost it." Ms. Fin nodded and turned away from Ryan.

"Is that so? Well Ryan you didn't lose it, what actually happened was that it fell behind the desk in your room while you were attacking my client Logan Mitchell."

"Objection! She's making assumptions." Ryan's lawyer stood up in outrage. Ms. Fin turned to Mrs. Stewart then looked to the judge.

"Actually I'm not. I know this because when it fell over it landed on the record button. Ms. Fin pulled a small table to the center of the room and placed the answering machine on the table. "I'm going to warn you, what you are about to here is not present." Ms. Fin pressed the play button and Ryan's voice filled the room.

_"I'm tired of waiting Logan, so I'm going to take what I want."_

After Ryan spoke movement was heard. There was loud banging and the sounds of things falling over until another voice filled the room, one that made everyone's eyes widen and gasp.

_"NO! STOP PLEASE!"_

More banging was heard followed by a painful cry. More cries of pain filled the room as everyone sat in silence horrified.

_"LET GO OF ME YOU LITTLE SHIT!"_

_"RYAN STOP PLEASE! NO MORE! NO!"_

Logan looked around the room trying to see everyone's reactions. James, Kendall, and Carlos couldn't help but flinch every time Logan screamed even though they had seen it before. Ms. Knight had a hand clasped over her mouth and she was crying silently as she held a crying Katie tightly to her. Camille, Jo, and Stephanie were holding on to each other for dear life as they listened with shock.

_"RYAN PLEASE! STOP IT!"_

Logan closed his eyes tightly knowing what was coming

_"NO! STOP! PLEASE!" _

Everyone in the room held in their breath seeming to know what was coming next.

_"AH! STOP PLEASE! SOMEBODY HELP ME!"_

The blood curdling screams coming from the answering machine shook everyone to their bones. Ms. Fin pressed the stop button on the answering machine. "I think we've heard enough." She silently crossed over to the opposite side of the room and sat back down next to Logan. No one spoke, no one moved, and Logan couldn't help but feel like no one was breathing. For a long time not a single sound entered the room. The judge cleared his throat causing everyone in the room to jump.

"We will take a short recess to allow the jury to decide on their verdict." Everyone nodded silently, almost every mind thinking that it was pointless; it was clear what the verdict should be. When the judge cleared out mostly everyone else cleared out as well. The only people who remained were James, Kendall, Carlos, Mrs. Knight, Katie, Jo, Stephanie, and Camille. Kendall hugged Logan tightly and whispered sweet nothings to him while James and Carlos rubbed his back. When they pulled away Katie ran up to Logan and pulled him into a tight hug. Logan felt bad that Katie had to hear all that. He probably should have warned Mrs. Knight ahead of time but there was nothing he could do now. When Katie pulled away Mrs. Knight embraced Logan as tears streamed down her face.

"Logan, I'm so sorry that happened to you. Knowing is one thing but actually hearing it…" Mrs. Knight shivered at the thought of what she just heard. She pulled away from Logan and kissed him on the forehead. "How are you doing sweety?" Logan smiled and looked down embarrassed from all the attention.

"I'm fine. It's getting easier." Mrs. Knight ruffled his hair and stepped to the side. Jo, Stephanie and Camille attacked Logan with a tight hug.

"Oh Logan I'm so sorry." Jo exclaimed.

"Please tell us you're going to be ok." Camille added.

"L-ladies…"

"What is it Logan? Are you ok? You can cry if you need to don't be ashamed." Stephanie squeezed Logan as she spoke.

"C-can't breathe…" The three girls gasped and pulled away. Logan took in a breath and smiled at his three embarrassed friends.

"Don't worry I'll be fine." They each smiled and hugged Logan again (softly this time). They made their way out of the court room so they could wait for the inevitable to happen.

* * *

Logan was back in the court room waiting the jury to return. He glanced over to Ryan's side of the room to see his shoulders were slumped in absolute defeat. No amount of money or trickery could save him now. The jury silently returned and took their seats. The judge turned to them and took in a breath.

"Has the jury reached a decision?"

"Yes. We the jury find the defendant Ryan Chester Guilty." Everyone in the court room cheered then quieted down. They were all smiling and hugging each other as they watched Ryan being hand cuffed and taken away. Logan let out a sigh of relief and stood up. He shook Ms. Fin's hand and smiled at her.

"Thank you Ms. Fin." She smiled at him and held her hand to his shoulder.

"No problem Logan." Ms. Fin went over to talk to Dr. Wells and a few other people while Logan turned to his friends. Logan squeaked as his friends ran to him and lifted him up. Carlos ruffled Logan's hair laughing while James squeezed the life out of Logan. When they each let go Logan found himself being lifted again. Kendall pulled Logan into a passionate kiss while spinning him around. Kendall and Logan were laughing as they pulled apart.

"You did it Logan. It's finally over." Carlos exclaimed excitedly. Logan nodded and smiled at his friend.

"Yea, thank god." Logan looked to each of his friends with pleading eyes. "Now can we go do something fun? We haven't done something fun in forever!" Kendall, James and Carlos glanced at each other then smirked.

"There's a golf cart at the Palm Woods that has our name on it." Kendall said with a smirk. Logan smiled and ran towards the door with his three friends behind him.

* * *

"Who would have thought driving a golf cart through the lobby would be fun." Carlos plopped down on the couch sighing happily at the memory. Kendall and James plopped down next to Carlos but Logan stayed put glaring down at them.

"Yea fun for you! You're not the one who got chased around the Palm Woods by Bitters." Carlos rolled his eyes at Logan.

"He wasn't going to do anything."

"He had. A bat!" Logan exclaimed wide eyed. Kendall and James chuckled slightly at the memory. Kendall quieted when he realized Logan was glaring at him.

"Sorry babe, but it was fun to watch." Logan plopped down next to Kendall with a sigh.

"I'm sure it was. So… what are we going to do now?" Logan looked expectantly at his three friends who each looked up in thought.

"We can have a movie night." James finally suggested. Logan thought about it for a second then finally nodded.

"That would be great, especially since our last movie night didn't go so well." Carlos added. Logan flinched at the memory. That had been the day Ryan started calling him. Kendall noticed Logan's discomfort and pulled him into an embrace.

"Well we don't have to worry about that anymore." Kendall smiled at Logan who smiled back at him. After another moment they all got up from the couch. James and Carlos ran out the door to go rent some movies while Kendall and Logan ran out to get snacks and stuff. When they were out of the Palm Woods Logan laced his fingers with Kendall's. They walked down the street mostly in silence. Just knowing that they were in the company of each other was enough. They were nearly halfway there **(A/N: halfway there looking good now nothings gunna get in the way… =])** when Logan spotted a familiar face. Logan tugged on the sleeve of Kendall's shirt to get his attention.

"Hey look its Mrs. Stewart." Kendall glanced over immediately glaring when he spotted the woman stepping out of a starbucks. She hadn't notice them right away but once she looked up she glared. Logan swallowed hard as she walked over to them. Her glare seemed to deepen with every step. As soon as Mrs. Stewart reached them Kendall pulled Logan slightly behind him.

"Can we help you?" Kendall said bitterly. Mrs. Stewart didn't drop her glare. She glanced behind Kendall to see Logan looked from behind his arm.

"I hope your happy Mr. Mitchell." Logan furrowed his eyebrows at her tone. "I'm ruined because of you!" Logan stepped out from behind Kendall.

"What do you mean?" Mrs. Stewart continued to glare at Logan causing Kendall to let out a low guttural growl.

"I've lost everything! My job, my reputation, and it's all your fault you stupid little fag!" Mrs. Stewart pointed to Logan. Logan's eyes widened and he flinched slightly at her words. Kendall pulled Logan behind him again and glared daggers at Mrs. Stewart.

"The only one who is responsible for that is you. You're the one who tampered with evidence and you're the one who played dirty! If you hadn't done that you would still have a job." Kendall started pulling Logan away from Mrs. Stewart. "Have fun on the unemployment line." Kendall wrapped his arm around Logan's waist tightly as they made their way down the sidewalk. Logan glanced behind him as Kendall continued to pull him forward. Mrs. Stewart was still glaring at them as she stood in the middle of the sidewalk. Logan turned back forward wanting to focus on walking but he turned back when he heard Mrs. Stewart yelling at them.

"YOU"LL BURN IN HELL FOR THIS!" Mrs. Stewart took a step forward with a smirk on her face. "SAY HI TO YOU MOTHER FOR ME WHEN YOU GET THERE!" Her grin widened when she say the look on Logan's face. Kendall brought his hand up to Logan's head pulling him to his chest. He covered Logan's ear with his hand in case she decided to yell anything else. When Mrs. Stewart was finally out of sight Kendall relaxed a little. When he looked down at Logan he was looking towards the ground. Kendall stopped walking and turned Logan to him. He put his hand under Logan's chin and forced him to look upwards. Kendall frowned when he realized tears were slowly rolling down his cheeks. Kendall wiped the tears away and pulled Logan into a hug.

"Don't let what she said about you get to you." Logan looked up at Kendall with sad eyes.

"I don't care about what she said to me, it's just a word but…" Logan looked down as more tears fell. He looked back up at Kendall hopefully. "You don't think my mom is in hell right? I don't want to imagine her in a place like that." Kendall frowned and let out a sigh. He wasn't very religious but he wasn't about to let Logan go around thinking his mom was rotting in hell. She had never been nice to him but she still was his mom.

"Of course not Logie." Kendall wiped Logan's tears away and peppered kisses all over his face. He kept kissing Logan's face until Logan giggled and pulled away. Kendall smiled at Logan and went in for another kiss only to be stopped by Logan's hand.

"Ok, ok I get it." Logan said with a smile. "I'm fine you can stop smothering me with kisses… for now anyway." Logan smirked at Kendall and winked at him. Kendall's eyebrows arched and his eyes widened. He smirked and ran after Logan who had started running away from him. They didn't stop running until they were inside the store. As soon as Kendall caught up to Logan he wrapped his arms around him. He kissed Logan's neck and let go of him finally deciding they should probably stop wasting time. Logan and Kendall spent a good half hour walking up and down each aisle picking out what they wanted and also what they figured James and Carlos would want. When they were done they walked up to the cashier both of them caring an arm full of drinks and snacks. The cashier blinked at all the items then smiled as she rang them up.

"Party tonight?" the boys smiled at her.

"Movie night." The women nodded in understanding and handed them there bags after Kendall paid.

"Have fun." Kendall and Logan smiled again before making their way back to the Palm Woods. When they entered the apartment Carlos and James were already there. They both shot up off the couch and grabbed the bags from their friends.

"What took you guys so long?" Carlos exclaimed. Kendall looked at Logan waiting for the ok. Logan nodded and walked towards the kitchen so he could start getting everything ready. Kendall turned to James and Carlos who were both staring at him.

"There was a… incident." James and Carlos looked at each other then back to Kendall with furrowed eye brows.

"What do you mean an incident?" James glanced behind him knowing in the pit of his stomach it had to do with Logan but Logan didn't look too shaken up so it couldn't have been that bad. Kendall sighed getting James' attention.

"We ran into Ryan's lawyer on the way to the store and she said some… not so nice things."

"What did she say?" Kendall sighed, he really didn't want to say it but he knew that if he were in Carlos position he would have asked the same question.

"Apparently she lost her job because of the trial and she's blaming Logan. She started yelling at him saying that he was going to burn in hell and she called him… the… F word." James furrowed his eyebrows.

"She called him a fuck?" Kendall sighed loudly.

"No, the other F word."

"A fag?" Kendall smacked Carlos on the arm.

"Don't say that word!" Carlos held his hand to his arm with an expression of hurt.

"Ok, ok jeez." Carlos lowered his hand and glanced back at Logan who didn't seem to be paying much attention. He was getting out bowls and placing chips and other things in them. He also got out cups and was starting to bring all the soda and cups into the living room. "Did she say anything else?" Kendall sighed and nodded.

"When she told Logan that he would burn in hell she said, 'say hello to your mother for me when you get there.' Out of everything she said that hurt Logan the most." James and Carlos both sighed. Logan just couldn't catch a break. Kendall noticed there expressions and immediately tried to brighten up. Logan was fine now so he didn't want them to bring his mood back down. "Logan's fine now you don't need to worry. Let's just enjoy our movie night." James and Carlos each smiled and nodded. They all walked into the living room to see that Logan had finished setting everything up.

"So, what movies did you guys get?" Logan asked. James and Carlos ran to the kitchen and grabbed a bag of movies. They took the movies out and gave them to Logan. Logan looked through them while Kendall silently read the titles over Logan's shoulder. "Let's see… 300, ice age, Cry wolf, Up, Saw, King Kong, Paranormal Activity, and the Strangers(1)." Logan looked up with a smirk on his face. "Well I think it's obvious which movies Carlos picked out. Carlos pouted and grabbed the movies from Logan.

"No it's not!" Logan rolled his eyes and plopped down on the couch.

"So you weren't the one who picked Ice Age and Up." Carlos narrowed his eyes and set the movies down.

"Shut up!" Logan, Kendall and James laughed as they took a seat. Kendall sat down next to Logan and pulled him over so he was cuddled into his side. "What movie do you guys want to watch first?" Carlos looked up at his friends expectantly.

"How about The Strangers, I heard that was good." James said with a smile. Logan and Kendall agreed making Carlos put the DVD in.

"This is gunna be good." Carlos said as he situated himself on the floor.

* * *

"They were almost done with the first movie and Logan was terrified. He knew it was a scary movie but this had to be the scariest movie he'd ever seen. Logan was curled up closely to Kendall. At some point during the movie Kendall had grabbed a blanket and thrown it over both of them. Kendall glanced down at Logan and couldn't help but smile. Logan held the blanket up to his face making only his eyes visible. Kendall thought it was the cutest thing in the word. Kendall turned back to the movie to see that the main girl protagonist was hiding in the kitchen closet. When one of the masked kills popped out of nowhere Logan jumped so high he landed right in Kendall's lap. Kendall chuckled to himself and wrapped his arms around Logan's waist. Logan wrapped his arms around Kendall's neck as he sat on his lap sideways so he could still watch the movie. When the movie ended Logan let out a sigh of relief. Carlos jumped up and took the movie out.

"What do you guys want to watch next?" Carlos held up another DVD so everyone could see it. "How about Paranormal Activity." Logan swallowed hard.

"H-how about we watch a different movie first and save that for later. W-we shouldn't watch two scary movies in a row. We should 'cleanse our pallet' then watch the scary movie." Logan looked to everyone expectantly. Carlos scoffed and picked up the Ice Age DVD.

"You're not making fun of me for picking kiddy movies now are you?" Logan narrowed his eyes and shook his head at Carlos.

"Shut up."

* * *

When the boys had gotten to their last movie they fell asleep halfway through it. Carlos was lying on the floor, James was leaning against the arm of the couch, and Logan was sleeping peacefully in Kendall's arms.

**A/N: YEY! Logan won! Logan won! Now you would think that this is a good place to end the story… maybe… maybe not. Hehehe….**

**There's more to come!**

**(1): I never saw Paranormal Activity but the Strangers scared the shit out of me! That was one scary movie!**


	26. date night

A week after the trial had ended Logan woke up cuddling into Kendall's side. Logan smiled and slowly stood up trying not to disturb his sleeping boyfriend. Logan stretched his muscles and quietly walked out of the room and into the kitchen. He looked at the clock noticing that it was almost 11. Logan went to the frig deciding to make breakfast for everyone. He took a look for a minute and grabbed bacon and a carton of eggs. He grabbed a box of pancake mix and began cooking. While the bacon and eggs were cooking Logan poured the pancake mix into the pan. He made chocolate chip, blue berry, and banana pancakes also throwing some regular pancakes into the mix. When the pancakes, bacon, and eggs were done Logan set the table and placed the food on it. Almost on cue everyone seemed to walk out of their rooms at that moment. They all looked tired but as soon as they smelled the delicious food they perked up. Carlos was the first to sit down and eat. James, Mrs. Knight and Katie sat down at the same time and after Logan sat down Kendall walked into the room. Logan smiled at Kendall who sat down next to him. As soon as everyone had their food Logan made himself a plate.

"Thanks for making breakfast Logan." Carlos said between chewing. Logan chuckled at Carlos who was smiling at him with half a pancake hanging out of his mouth.

"Carlos don't talk with your mouth full." Mrs. Knight tried to keep the smile from her face as she scolded Carlos for his lack of manners.

"Sorry mamma Knight." Once everyone was done eating Logan stood up to help Mrs. Knight clean the dishes. Mrs. Knight glanced at the clock then let out a gasp.

"Katie, we're going to be late! Kendall can you help Logan?" Kendall nodded as he watched his mom drag Katie out the door. Kendall walked over to Logan and wrapped his arms around his waist. He placed his chin on his shoulder and kissed Logan's neck, watching him wash the dishes.

"She said help me not seduce me Kendall." Kendall chuckled and moved his head until his lips were inches from Logan's ear. Kendall started stroking Logan's stomach smirk when he felt the boy shiver.

"Which would you rather have me do Logan?" Logan tried to focus on spraying the soapy dishes with water but Kendall's hands were very distracting. Logan bit his lip suppressing a moan as Kendall's hands run up to his chest and lightly caressed his nipples through his shirt. Kendall's hands slowly ran back down and stopped at the top of Logan's jeans. When Kendall moved down and cupped Logan through his jeans Logan unconsciously squeezed the handle on the hose. Unfortunately for both Logan and Kendall it was facing them when it went off. Both boys yelled when they were sprayed with cold water. Logan immediately dropped it and stepped away from the sink looking down at his drenched shirt. He looked up at Kendall who was not as wet as him but the water had obviously hit him in the face. Logan smiled and started laughing at Kendall who was still recovering from the sudden wetness. By the time Kendall had dried his face Logan was clutching his stomach laughing hysterically. Kendall shook his head and walked towards the sink.

"You think that's funny huh." Logan stopped laughing when Kendall took the hose in his hand. He took a step away from Kendall with his hands up.

"Kendall, don't" Kendall pressed the handle and started soaking Logan with water. Logan yelped and tried to cover himself with his hands. Realizing that wasn't working he ran away only to be chased by Kendall. Once they entered their room their game of cat and mouse quickly turned into a heated make out session when Kendall grabbed Logan around the waist, turned him around, and pressed their lips together. Logan wrapped his arms around Kendall's neck moaning when Kendall licked his bottom lip. Logan opened his mouth allowing Kendall access. Kendall ran his tongue over Logan's exploring every part of his mouth. They continued kissing until the need for air became too great. When they pulled apart they were panting and gasping. Kendall leaned his forehead against Logan's and smiled down at him. Logan smiled back and softly kissed Kendall's lips. "What do you want to do today?" Kendall looked up in thought for a moment then looked back down to Logan with a smirk on his face. He broke away from Logan and started rummaging through his dresser. After he picked out an outfit he turned to Logan before walking into the bathroom.

"Get dressed, we're going out." Logan blinked for a moment then furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"Going out? To where?" Kendall smiled then started to close the bathroom door.

"I don't know yet but I'm taking you out." Logan stood for a moment then a smile came to his face as Kendall's words sank in. Kendall was taking Logan out on a date. He didn't know when and he didn't know where but that really didn't bother him. Logan went over to his closet and started picked out an outfit. When he was finally done getting ready he stood in the middle of the living room swaying nervously on his feet as he waited for Kendall. Logan didn't know why he was nervous. He had been dating Kendall for a long ass time but when he really thought about it they never really went on actual dates. The whole Ryan situation had taken up all of their time and really didn't allow them to do anything else. Logan started feeling guilty when he thought about that. Kendall had done so much for him and he hadn't done anything in return. Kendall never would ask for Logan to do anything for him but Logan felt like he just needed to repay him somehow. When Kendall walked into the living room Logan couldn't help but lick his lips. He wore jeans that seemed to fit him perfectly and a shirt that hugged his chest making the muscles under it more prominent. Thoughts of Logan running his hands over those muscles went through Logan's mind and instantly led his mind to other things. Logan blushed and shook the thoughts from his head. He didn't think he was ready to be thinking about doing that. Kendall smiled and walked over to Logan. He kissed him on the lips and started to drag Logan out the door.

* * *

After at least ten minutes of debating Logan and Kendall found themselves at the hockey hall of fame (1). It had taken Logan a lot of time to get Kendall to confess that he had been itching to go there but once he did Logan wanted to go there to. It actuality Logan could care less about going to the hall of fame. He did love hockey but he had already memorized everyone who was in the hockey hall of fame. Logan was only going because Kendall wanted to go. He figured that the only way to make up for him not doing anything for Kendall was to make this date about him. Logan knew that if Kendall found out what he was doing he wouldn't be happy about it because Kendall was taking Logan out but Logan could really care less, he had to do this.

"Logan! Logan! Logan, look at this. Logan laughed as he followed Kendall who was bouncing from room to room excitedly. He would find something interesting, start yelling Logan's name while pointing at whatever got his attention, run over to it, then start all over again when he would find something even more interesting a second later. Kendall and Logan must have been yelled at over 100 times for touching things but whenever that happened they would laugh and continue on their way.

"Kendall are you having fun?" Kendall and Logan were making their way through the last area of the hall of fame. Kendall looked at Logan with the brightest smile and nodded his head so much Logan thought it would go flying off. Logan smiled back just as brightly and wrapped his arms around Kendall's arm. "Good." When they had seen every part of the exhibit they made their way back to the car.

"Do you wanna go get something to eat Logie?" Logan nodded and leaned his head against Kendall's shoulder.

"Now that you mention it I'm really starting to get hungry." Kendall laughed as he climbed into the car. Logan climbed in and turned the car on before turning to look at Kendall. "Where do you want to eat?" Kendall thought for a moment and turned back to Logan.

"How about Veggie Heaven (2)." Logan furrowed his eyebrows at Kendall.

"You hate that place, why would you want to go there?" Kendall reached his hand up and poked Logan in the nose.

"I would want to eat there because you love to eat there." Logan sighed and leaned his head against the chair still looking at Kendall.

"I don't want you to eat there just because I like it. Let's go somewhere we both like."

"But Logie I'm taking you out remember." Logan sighed. He had to think of a way out of this.

"I know but can we go somewhere else. I'm not really in the mood for vegetarian anyway." Kendall made an "oh" face and nodded. After thinking about it for a long moment Logan smiled. "How about we go to Rainbow Buffet." (3) Kendall sat up in his seat a little at the thought of going to his favorite restaurant. After a moment his face fell when a thought came to him.

"I didn't really think you liked going there Logan." Logan faltered for a moment trying to think of something.

"W-well not normally but I'm really hungry so it defiantly sounds like a good place." Logan sighed with relief when it seemed that Kendall had bought it. After driving in mostly silence for 15 minutes they finally arrived at the restaurant. Kendall and Logan walked in smiling but Logan was only smiling because Kendall was. He had succeeded in making this night all about Kendall. When they had gathered all the food they wanted to eat they sat at a secluded table and started to eat. Logan never really liked this place because it looked dirty. The smells and the general atmosphere made it seem like the people who ran it didn't really care. The fact that you could get in and eat as much food as you wanted for 10 dollars also helped in Logan's thinking that this place was dirty. Even though Logan was once again somewhere he didn't really care for the fact that Kendall was happy made him so much happier. Kendall's bright smile made the food taste like it came out of a five star restaurant. After Kendall and Logan ate their fill they decided to sit and talk until they're stomachs didn't feel like they were going to burst.

"So, are you going to tell me what's up now?" Logan's eyes widened and his mouth fell open a little bit.

"W-what are you talking about?" Kendall rolled his eyes and sighed.

"Why did we go to the hockey hall of fame? I know you memorized everything in there and why are we here?" Kendall lifted his arms gesturing to everything around him. "I know you hate this place. This date was supposed to be about you Logan, but we're doing all the things I like." Logan sighed and dropped his gaze from Kendall. Logan played with the hem of his shirt as he spoke.

"Well it's just that… you've done so much for me and I feel like I haven't done anything for you. I just wanted the date to be about you because everything in our relationship so far has been about me." Logan didn't glance up. He was afraid to see Kendall's expression because he already knew he was probably mad at him. Kendall sighed making Logan clench his eyes shut in preparation for the verbal onslaught. Logan didn't notice Kendall had moved from sitting across from him to next to him until a hand was being placed under his chin and forcing him to look up. Logan relaxed slightly when he realized Kendall wasn't mad at him but was looking at him lovingly.

"Logan, I did all those things for you because I love you. You needed me so I was there for you. I know that if I ever need you you'll be there for me too. Don't feel like you're not doing anything because just knowing that your happy is making me happy." Logan smiled at Kendall because he knew exactly what he was talking about. Every time Logan had seen Kendall smiling about something he couldn't help but be happy. Kendall cupped Logan's cheeks and pulled him into a passionate kiss. It was slow allowing Kendall to show just how much he loved Logan. When Kendall pulled away he couldn't help but smirk at the shaky breath Logan let out. "And Logan, you know you've done things for me that I could never repay no matter how hard I tried right?" Logan furrowed his eye brows trying to think of what he possibly could have done that meant so much to Kendall. Kendall took Logan's hand and brought it up to his lips. He started planting kisses on his fingers as he spoke. "you back up my craziest plans even though you know we'll get in trouble, you try and protect me even though you know it's hard, you put me first because you love me, and most importantly, you took a bullet that was meant for my sister. If it wasn't for you I would have lost another member of my family. I don't know what I would have done if anything happened to Katie." Logan was blushing as Kendall continued to kiss him. As he spoke he had gradually moved from his fingers to his wrist and was now hovering over his neck. Logan sighed as Kendall's lips brushed against his sensitive skin.

"Ok Kendall a get it." Kendall chuckled at the absolute pleasure in Logan's voice. Kendall pulled away and took Logan's hand leading him out of the restaurant. When they returned to the apartment they found that no one was around. Logan swallowed hard and couldn't help but suddenly feel nervous. They had just finished a wonderful date and now they were alone in their apartment. Only an idiot wouldn't think of what was coming next. Logan felt even more nerves when Kendall finished putting his coat away and walked back over to him. Logan had done a lot with Kendall. From hand jobs to blow jobs to other things but they had not made the step to sex yet. Kendall was standing in front of Logan just staring into his eyes. Logan could tell that he was waiting for Logan to make the first move or to at least tell Kendall if he wanted this or not. Logan swallowed again and looked up at Kendall with fear. "K-Kendall I don't know if…" Logan trailed off and looked away from Kendall. Kendall placed his hand under Logan's chin so Logan would look up at him.

"Logan if you're not ready I understand. I never expected you to be. Wait until you're sure and when you are… I'll make sure its special." Logan blushed slightly at the thought but smiled at Kendall. Logan leaned up and kissed Kendall softly before pulling Logan to their room so they could literally sleep together (no sex). (4)

**A/N: sorry I didn't update that quickly. I had friends over and I had a ton of hw to do. But lucky for you guys I am now roommate less so I don't have to worry about being disturbed will I'm typing lol. Anyway,**

**I hope you enjoyed this chapter and**

**There is more to come.**

**(1): totally made that up. I don't know if a hockey hall of fame exists.**

**(2): Veggie Heaven is a restaurant by me. My brothers a vegetarian so we went there for thanks giving.**

**(3): Yet another restaurant by me. It's a buffet that I've gone to a couple of times and it never seemed dirty to me but when I really thought about it the food can't be that good if your only paying 10 bucks to eat all you want. **

**(4): added the (no sex) just in case you didn't get that they were sleeping together in the sense that they were not having sex but actually sleeping. Lol **


	27. good days come before the bad

Another month had gone by since the trial and Logan was better than ever. He never really thought about Ryan anymore and he thought he could finally move on. Kendall and Logan's relationship was going on stronger than ever but there was one problem. For the past few days Logan couldn't get the idea of having sex with Kendall out of his mind. He knew he was starting to warm up to the idea but almost everything made him horny. Yesterday he walked into the kitchen to see Kendall eating a banana and got hard. The day before that he plopped down on the couch and nearly jumped out of his skin when he sat on the remote. He would never admit it but that made him hard. At the current moment Logan had just taken a cold shower after waking up with a hard on. As soon as Logan was dressed he walked into the living room and sighed. James, Carlos and Kendall were all sitting on the couch playing video games but what made Logan sigh was the fact that Kendall was shirtless. If all this was some well thought out plan to get Logan to sleep with Kendall it was defiantly starting to work. Before Logan could go sit on the couch the phone rang. He walked into the kitchen and picked it up.

"Hello?"

"_Hey Logan its dad."_ Logan sat on a stool smiling slightly. He hadn't talk to his dad in a while so it was nice to hear from him.

"Hey dad, what's up?"

"_Nothing much. I just wanted to see how you were doing? Is everything ok?"_ Logan sighed and leaned against the counter.

"Yea everything's good. It's defiantly getting easier.

"_That's good to hear."_ Logan could hear the relief in his father's voice. _"So how's everything else. How's James, Carlos, and Kendall. They better not be getting you in too much trouble."_ Logan chuckled slightly and glanced over to his friends who had their eyes glued to the TV.

"They're great dad and don't worry, we've been good." Logan's dad chuckled slightly.

"_Good, I would feel bad if you and the others were giving Mrs. Knight too much trouble."_ Logan smiled. _"I'm glad you're doing well Logan. I have a business trip coming up so hopefully I'll be able to drop by and see you."_ Logan sat up with a smile.

"Really? That would be great! I miss you a lot dad."

"_I know… I'm leaving for the trip tomorrow and it's going to last a few weeks. During the last week I'll be in LA so I'll keep in touch."_

"Ok."

"_Logan… because I'm leaving tomorrow I won't be able to call you… Will you be ok?"_ Logan sighed. Tomorrow was the anniversary of his mom's death. This was going to be the first time he wasn't with his dad.

"Yea I should be fine. I have Kendall, James, and Carlos."

"_Ok good. If I somehow get a chance I'll call. Tell Mrs. Knight and the other's I say hello and tell Kendall to be prepared for when I visit."_ Logan smiled as his dad laughed at his own joke. Logan chuckled softly and rolled his eyes.

"Dad…"

"_Don't worry Logan I won't give him any speeches or anything. It's not like he could get you pregnant."_ Logan coughed loudly and blushed furiously.

"Dad!" Logan's dad laughed loudly.

"_What? I'm not an idiot Logan I know you two have sex its ok, you have nothing to be ashamed of." _Logan's blush must have grown ten shades darker.

"Dad we are not having sex!" Logan hissed into the phone.

"_Oh ok… but I'm guessing you will soon."_

"DAD!" Once Logan's father was done laughing they said their goodbyes and hung up. Logan walked over to the couch to see that his friends were staring at him with raised eyebrows.

"Geez Logan, what did your dad say to get you like that? You look like a tomato!" Carlos smirked as Logan glared at him. Logan plopped down on the couch with a pout.

"None of your business Carlitos. He mostly just said that he was going on a business trip and that he would visit in a few weeks." James, Kendall, and Carlos smiled at Logan.

"That's great." Kendall said. Logan turned to Kendall with a smile. He quickly turned away when he found himself glancing down to Kendall's chest. Logan looked towards the TV but he was glancing towards Kendall. Logan licked his lips as his eyes moved down Kendall's chest. When his eyes reached Kendall's belly button he noticed Kendall had a blonde happy trail. Logan shifted slightly when his eyes rested on Kendall's crotch. Logan's eyes widened and he blushed when he realized Kendall's shorts showed an outline of his dick. He must have been going commando. Logan looked back towards the TV feeling uncomfortable because he now had a raging hard on. Logan had been fighting the urge to jump Kendall's bones all week but he knew he was about to brake. He wanted Kendall now. Logan glanced over to James and Carlos trying to think of a way to get them out of the apartment for a while. They were both dressed but they didn't look like they were planning on going anywhere. Logan whipped out his phone and texted the one person he thought could help him.

"_Hey I need a favor."_ Logan sat impatiently as he waited for a text back.

"_Hey Logan, what do you need?"_ Logan quickly replied glancing at his friends to make sure they weren't reading over his shoulder.

"_I want_ _to be alone with Kendall so I need James and Carlos out of the apartment. A few hours would be nice."_ Logan didn't wait more than a minute when he got a reply.

"_Sure Logan. I'll be at your apartment in a minute."_

"_Thanks Stephanie."_ Logan looked towards the door just waiting for the knock to come. When someone finally knocked James, Kendall, and Carlos looked up.

"Carlos why don't you get it." Logan was trying to sound calm but it was hardly working. Carlos walked over to the door smiling brightly when he opened it.

"Stephanie! What are you doing here?" Carlos hugged her and led her into the apartment.

"I was just hanging around the Palm Woods and I thought you might want to hang out. I was planning to go to the mall. They're having a sale on hair care products and helmets. James immediately jumped up.

"I want to go!" Carlos nodded vigorously wanting to go as well. Stephanie grabbed James and Carlos and pushed them out the door making sure Kendall wouldn't suddenly decide that he wanted to come to. Logan walked over to the door to close it behind them. Stephanie took her time getting out the door and when she noticed Carlos and James were by the elevator she turned to Logan.

"Thanks so much for this. It means a lot." Stephanie smiled at Logan and handed him a paper bag. Logan looked at it for a moment then looked back at Stephanie confused.

"No problem Logan. That's for you. You'll need that." Stephanie winked and jogged down towards the elevator. Logan closed the door and peered in the bag. He blushed when he realized it was lube.

"Where the hell did she get this?" Logan looked back over to where Kendall was and stuffed the bottle in his pocket. He walked towards his and Kendall's room glancing over to the couch to make sure Kendall was watching him. When his eyes meet with Kendall's he quickly looked away and slowed his pace. Once he was close to the entrance to their room he pealed of his shirt and walked in. Logan hoped that would give Kendall enough incentive to come into their room and it obviously worked when Kendall peered in from around the corner. Kendall was in the room for less than two seconds when he was vigorously kissed by Logan. Logan pulled Kendall away from the door so he could close it and lock it. Logan pulled Kendall over to the bed and pushed him down. He straddled Kendall's hips and started kissing him again. Tongues and teeth clashed as Kendall and Logan passionately kissed. Logan run his hands over Kendall's chest moaning at the feel of his muscles. After a few minutes of kissing Kendall pulled away and looked at Logan confused.

"What's going on?" Kendall couldn't help but notice the pure lust in Logan's eyes. Logan was gasping as he stared at Kendall with half lidded eyes.

"I can't wait anymore. Please tell me you still want to. I need you so bad." Logan leaned down lying fully on top of Kendall. He closed his eyes and moaned as he rubbed himself against Kendall. Kendall groaned and grabbed Logan's hips stopping his distracting movements. Logan let out a high pitched moan at the loss of friction.

"You sure Logie?" Logan looked up at Kendall and nodded. Kendall smiled and pulled Logan into a passionate kiss. "If you change your mind at all we'll stop, ok." Logan nodded and pulled Kendall into another kiss. Logan started grinding against Kendall again once he released his tight hold. Kendall groaned and ran his hands all over Logan's back. Logan was letting out soft moans as he kissed and sucked Kendall's neck. Kendall flipped them over so he rested between Logan's legs. Kendall leaned up slightly smirking at Logan. Logan whimpered pulling on Kendall's arm to get him to lie back down while he moved his hips trying to find friction. Kendall pinned Logan to the bed and leaned down until he was hovering near his ear. Logan shivered at the feel of Kendall's hot breath by his ear.

"Do you want me Logan?" Logan let out a loud moan, finding it impossible to speak. Kendall licked Logan's ear and moved down toward his neck. As Kendall licked and nipped Logan's neck his hands moved to Logan's zipper. Logan let out another moan as he felt his pants being pulled off. Kendall moved to his own zipper and pulled away from Logan so he could get his pants off. He bent back down still holding down Logan's hips as he licked down Logan's chest. Logan moaned loudly and threaded his fingers through his own hair when Kendall attached his lips to Logan's nipple. He circled the nub with his tongue while he tweaked Logan's other nipple with his fingers. Logan let out a whimper as Kendall sucked and nipped the nub. Kendal pulled away and slid up Logan's body groaning as their crotches slid together. Logan pulled Kendall into another kiss separating with a gasp when he felt fingers on his nipple again. Kendall moved his hands down to Logan's waist pinning him down again. Logan whimpered trying franticly to get friction. "You want me so badly don't you Logan."

"Y-yes." Logan whispered barely able to speak over the lust that consumed him. Kendall leaned towards Logan's ear smirking.

"Logie…" Logan moaned so Kendall knew he was listening. "I'm going to fuck you hard." Kendall's voice was deep and husky. Logan's eyes rolled back and he let out a long moan which turned into a short whine. He shook as his hips thrust under Kendall's hold. Kendall looked down confused until he noticed the wet stain on Logan's underwear. Kendall glanced back up at Logan who was blushing furiously. Kendall blinked slightly in disbelief. He made Logan cum… with his voice." Kendall couldn't help but feel an ego boost as he leaned down and kissed Logan. After a few moments Logan was moaning and whimpering again. Kendall pulled away from Logan and removed his own boxers. After waiting a moment to let Logan look him over Kendall removed Logan's boxers.

"Kendall… my pants… in the pocket." Kendall pulled away from Logan again and reached into Logan's pants pocket. He smiled when he discovered the lube.

"How did you get this?"

"Stephanie." Kendall raised an eyebrow but let it go. He would find out about that later. Kendall sat back and spread Logan's legs. Logan watched, his heart racing as Kendall poured lube onto his fingers then moved to Logan's entrance. Logan gasped when he felt Kendall's finger rubbing around the rim. He shut his eyes letting himself relax as Kendall pushed a finger in. After a few moments of getting used to it Logan began to moan and thrust into the finger. Kendall added another finger and started thrusting in and scissoring. After adding a third finger Kendall pulled out deciding Logan was ready. Logan whimpered at the loss of Kendall's fingers but groaned when he felt Kendall's well lubricated erection poking at his entrance. Kendall looked to Logan for permission and slowly pushed in. Logan gasped, closing his eyes as Kendall pushed in until he was all the way in. Kendall waited a few minutes giving Logan a moment to adjust to his size. Logan moaned and rapped his legs around Kendall as a sign for him to start moving. Kendall pulled out almost all the way and groaned as he slowly thrust back in.

"Oh god Logan you so tight." Kendall leaned forward and started to kiss Logan's neck. He started thrusting in quicker and harder making Logan moan louder and louder. Logan clawed at Kendall's back as Kendall started to pound into him. Kendall was hitting his prostate dead on making him see stars. Kendall groaned and gave a very hard thrust causing Logan to scream out and cum. Kendall felt Logan's entrance squeeze him so he slowed down not wanting it to be over yet. Once Logan had come down from his orgasm Kendall started to pick up the pace again.

"OH GOD! Right there! Right there!" Kendall pounded into Logan vigorously feeling Logan's second orgasm approaching. Right before Logan exploded Kendall slowed down not allowing Logan to cum. Kendall slowed his pace thrusting slowly put hard. Logan screamed with every thrust. "Kendall! Faster! I need to cum!" Kendall groaned and sat up slightly. He grabbed onto Logan's hips and pulled out almost all the way before thrusting in harder than he ever. Logan screamed and arched his back. He fisted the sheets as Kendall rapidly pounded into him. Logan's mouth hung open and his eyes were open wide as the intense pleasure washed over him. After three more rapid thrust Logan came screaming Kendall's name. The edges of his vision went white and his back arched as Kendall continued to thrust into him adding on to his orgasm. Logan's eyes rolled back and his body stiffened as Kendall's continuous thrusting extended the length of his orgasm. After three more hard thrust Kendall came groaning Logan's name. His hips stuttered and his eyes rolled back as Logan's entrance convulsed around him. Kendall collapsed on top of Logan completely spent as they both were gasping for breath. Once Kendall had collected himself he pulled out of Logan slowly and plopped down next to him. Logan rolled over and laid his head on Kendall's chest. Logan looked up at Kendall with a huge smile. "I love you Kendall." Kendall smiled back at Logan and cupped his cheek.

"I love you more." Logan giggled and smirked.

"Not possible."Kendall arched his eyebrow smirking at Logan.

"Oh really, why is that?" Logan lifted his hand and pinched his pointer finger and his thumb together.

"Because I love you this much." Kendall furrowed his eye brows and frowned.

"That isn't very much." Logan smiled at Kendall before sitting up slightly.

"Actually it's a whole lot because it starts here." Logan pointed at his pointer finger then did a circular motion until he touched his thumb. "Then it goes all the way around the world and ends up right here (1)." Kendall laughed and pulled Logan into a soft kiss. Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan's waist and breathed in deeply.

"You're such a cheese ball Logan." Logan giggled making Kendall look down and smile at him. After a few minutes both boys drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Logan awoke to the sound of muffled shouting. He sat up in bed looking around lazily until his eyes ended on Kendall. He smiled at the sight of his sleeping boyfriend but when he heard a muffled yelp he decided to get up. Logan grabbed a pair of Kendall's sweatpants that he found on the floor (he was too lazy to walk to his closet and get his own) and walked into the living room. He rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and yawned. He stopped in his tracks when he found James and Carlos rolling around on the floor.

"What are you to doing?" James and Carlos stopped suddenly to look at Logan. They both stood up and glared at each other before turning to Logan.

"He!" James yelled when pointing at Carlos, "Lost my bag of hairspray!"

"I told you I gave it back to you after we left the bathroom!" Carlos yelled.

"No you didn't!"

"Yes I did!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

"WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP!" Logan lowered his voice when he had his friend's attention. "Kendall is sleeping." James raised an eye brow suddenly forgetting he was mad.

"Sleeping?" It's 3 in the afternoon why is he sleeping." James gestured to Logan. "And why do you look like you just woke up."

"Because I did."

"Why were you…" James glanced down noticing Logan was wearing Kendall's sweatpants. A huge grin came to his face before he turned to Carlos who seemed to be coming to the same conclusion. "Oh, I get it." Logan furrowed his eye brows in confusion.

"Get what?"

"A rigorous activity requires some nap time. So how was it?" Logan's eyes widened and his face turned bright red.

"W-what are you talking about?" Logan squeaked out. Carlos scoffed and rolled his eyes.

"Oh please, now it makes sense why Stephanie wanted to hang out with me and James all day. You totally set that up so you and Kendall could have sex. I mean look at you! Your sweaty, you've got sex hair, not to mention you're wearing his pants." Logan blushed deepened and he walked towards the kitchen.

"Oh shut up."

"I guess that limp means you were the bottom."

"CARLOS!" Carlos and James laughed at Logan's face. He absolutely hated talking about anything sexual but he didn't mind having sex apparently.

"Oh calm down Logan, we're only teasing. We're just so proud of you. You're a man now!" James let out a fake dramatic sniff and wiped away a fake tear. Logan narrowed his eyes at his friends and shook his head.

"You just wait until you have sex, you won't be laughing then." Before James or Carlos could say anything the phone rang. Logan walked over to the counter and picked it up. Carlos and James' faces turned from amused to concerned when Logan's eyes widened at whatever the person on the other end was saying. Logan thanked whoever it was then hung up. He stared into space for a moment trying to gather his thoughts.

"Logan, what is it?" James said with worry. Logan turned to Carlos and James with confusion in his eyes.

"That was Ms. Fin… Ryan's been stabbed."

**A/N: oooo…. Most of you are probably thinking YEA! Lol but member the stories not over yet! Anyway!**

**There's more to come!**

**(1): If you ever saw the movie letters to god that's from that movie. It's a great movie and it's very sad. =[**


	28. what do you remember

It was the next day and Logan was sitting by the phone waiting for another call from Ms. Fin. Everything that was going on was so strange. Apparently Ryan had gotten into a fight with a cellmate and now he was in some hospital in LA. Logan wasn't sure what he was feeling. He didn't want Ryan to die and he felt guilty when he discovered that he honestly didn't care what happened to Ryan. He just wanted to make sure that if Ryan lived he was put right back in jail. Kendall was standing behind Logan with his arms wrapped around him. He was leaning his chin on Logan's shoulder but every now and then he would kiss Logan's neck or the side of his face. After another moment of silence the phone finally rang. Logan picked it up and took in a breath before putting it to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Hello Logan it's Ms. Fin. I'm calling to give you an update." Logan took one of Kendall's hands gripping it.

"Ok."

"Well it seems that the stab wound wasn't deep so Ryan should live. He has to stay in the hospital for a few weeks then he will be put back in jail. There are officers watching him 24/7 so you don't have to worry about him ok." Logan sighed with relief. The thought of Ryan getting out of the hospital and coming for him had been a constant fear since he first heard Ryan wasn't in jail anymore. Logan thanked Ms. Fin and hung up. He turned to Kendall who was watching with concern.

"What did she say?" Before Logan could reply James and Carlos who had been in the living room ran over wanting to hear what happened as well.

"She said that he is going to live and once better he'll be put back in jail. She also said that there are always guards in the room so there is no way he can get out somehow. Jams, Kendall, and Carlos each let out a sigh. James and Carlos walked back over to the couch so they could resume watching TV. Logan let out another sigh. He felt safe but he still felt uneasy. Knowing that Ryan was at a hospital near the Palm Woods was a scary but it made sense that on today of all days something bad would happen. June 10th was the anniversary of Logan's mother's death. Every year since her death something bad would happen on this day. The year after Logan broke his leg. The next year Logan's cat died and it continued like that all the way up till now. Logan jumped off the stool and started walking over to his and Kendall's room. Today probably wouldn't have bothered him so much if he wasn't so anxious and he never realized how hard it would be without his dad around. When Logan got to his room he laid down deciding he needed a nap. He felt close to sleep when the bed shifted signaling that someone had sat down on it. Logan opened his eyes to see Kendall looking down at him.

"You ok Logie?" Logan sighed and shook his head. There was no point in lying and Kendall would get mad if he found out. Kendall let out a sigh and began to rub Logan's back.

"You don't have to worry about Ryan. He can't hurt you." Logan sighed turning over onto his back so he could look up at Kendall.

"It's not just that Kendall. Something bad always happens this day and it always makes me feel worse." When Logan saw Kendall's look of confusion he frowned. Logan turned over so he was facing the wall. "You don't even know what I'm talking about do you?" Kendall flinched at the hurt in Logan's voice. He tried to think of what today was but he was drawing a blank. Kendall glanced over to the calendar hanging on the wall to see that it was June 10th. After another moment of thought Kendall finally remembered. Kendall lay down behind Logan and wrapped his arms around him. Logan tried to move away but Kendall just pulled him close again.

"I remember now. I'm sorry I forgot."

"You do? Or are you just saying that so I won't get mad at you?" Kendall sighed and turned Logan over. Logan had his arms crossed across his chest and Kendall could tell Logan was on the verge of tears.

"No, I remember. Your mom died today… and the year after that you broke your leg… and the year after that your cat died… and the year after that James, Carlos, and I got you kicked out of the science fair and…" Logan put his hand over Kendall's mouth to stop him from speaking.

"Ok you remembered… a lot more than I thought you remembered." Kendall kissed Logan's cheek and wiped away a tear that managed to fall.

"Of course I remember. I hate seeing you sad so I make sure I remember every bad thing that's ever happened to you so it never happens again. I also remember all the best times though so I can make sure they do happen again. Logan raised an eyebrow at Kendall.

"You remember every good and bad thing that's ever happened to me?"

"Yep, Carlos and James too."

"Yea right." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows at Logan.

"What?"

"There is no way you could remember all that." Kendall smirked at Logan and gave him the "oh really face."

"Ok, remember when we went ice skating on the pond behind Carlos' house when we were 7 and you fell through the ice. Carlos was so panicked when he ran back to his house he tripped going up the stairs and twisted his wrist. When we finally got you out Carlos' parents wrapped you in 20 blankets exactly and drove you to the hospital. Logan blinked a couple of times. He didn't realize Kendall remembered all that.

"Wow… you have a really good memory." Kendall smirked and laid his head down.

"Yea I know." Logan chuckled and laid his head on top of Kendall's chest. Before they knew it they both drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Kendall and Logan had managed to sleep through the rest of that day until the next morning. Logan opened his eyes to see Kendall watching him lovingly. Logan sat up with a smile and kissed Kendall softly.

"Good morning." Kendall smiled and wrapped his arms around Logan's waist pulling him close.

"Good morning." Kendall was about to kiss Logan again when Mrs. Knight walked into the room.

"Good morning boys." Logan squeaked and jumped off of Kendall. He sat at the end of the bed awkwardly as a blush came to his face. Kendall chuckled then stopped when he noticed his mom was giving him a look. "Do we need to have a talk?" Kendall's eyes widened and he sat up.

"No!" Kendall calmed himself a little standing up. "W-we weren't doing anything." Mrs. Knight stared at Kendall for a moment then sighed. She smiled at the boys and started walking out the door.

"Ok, get dressed. There's someone here to see you Logan." Logan stood confused for a moment but quickly got dressed. After he waited for Kendall to finish he walked into the living room looking around. Logan furrowed his eyebrows when he heard laughing. He followed the sounds of James, Carlos, and Mrs. Knight's voices until he found himself in the kitchen. Logan's eyes brightened and a smile came to his face when he noticed who was with them.

"Dad!"

**A/N: ok this chapter really sucked. I felt so forced writing this. I had no idea where I was going with this chapter. It's probably more like a filler chapter. The only good thing about this is it gave me some ideas for other stories =] well anyway I hope you still somehow managed to enjoy the suckyness that is chapter 28. The story will get better I promise!**

**There is more to come!**


	29. Oh my god

Mr. Mitchell smiled and stood up from his seat. He embraced Logan in a tight hug ruffling his hair before he let go. Logan looked up at his father smiling.

"What are you doing here? I thought you couldn't come for a couple of weeks." Mr. Mitchell let out a sigh and sat back down at the table.

"My business trip got cancelled but I still had the ticket for LA so I decided to visit early. I didn't want you to be alone today." Logan smiled gratefully at his dad. They both turned their attention to Mrs. Knight who was cooking breakfast.

"Rick, would you like some coffee with your omelet?" Rick gave Mrs. Knight a smile and nodded.

"That would be great thank you." He turned back to Logan but quickly noticed Kendall had joined them at the table. Rick gave him a devious smile making Kendall laugh awkwardly.

"Dad…" Mr. Mitchell looked to Logan with an innocent expression.

"What? I wasn't going to do anything. Now that I'm here though I think we need to have a talk." Logan groaned and sat farther down in his seat.

"Wasn't what you said on the phone enough?"

"So that's why you were blushing after your dad called you." Carlos exclaimed. Is that why you decided…"

"CARLOS!" Both Logan and Kendall looked at Carlos wide eyed. They couldn't believe he was just going to talk about that in front of their parents. It seemed though that Carlos had already done the damage. Mrs. Knight had stopped cooking to stare at the two boys wide eyed while Mr. Mitchell was trying to hide a smirk.

"Kendall you…" Kendall sighed heavily.

"Mom please not now!" Mrs. Knight sighed and went back to cooking.

"Fine, later then." Kendall sighed again and glared at Carlos. Carlos gave him an apologetic smile while James laughed at the whole situation.

"Calm down Kendall she would have found out eventually."

"Can we change the subject please!" Kendall threw a glare at James who was trying not to laugh. Logan watched not knowing if he should laugh or blush. When everyone went silent Mr. Mitchell sudden broke the silence.

"So… how was it?" Logan's eyes widened and a huge blush came to his face.

"OH MY GOD DAD!" Kendall stared at Mr. Mitchell wide eyed while Logan held his head in his hands. James, Carlos, and Mr. Mitchell couldn't help but laugh at the two boy's embarrassment. "Never ask me that again… god! This is so embarrassing. Mr. Mitchell patted Logan on the back still laughing.

"Ok, ok I'll drop it." Logan let out a sigh as Mrs. Knight put plates in front of everyone. They sat talking and laughing while they ate. Once they were done Logan decided to spend the day with his dad.

After a few hours of showing his dad around LA and doing various activities they were in the car heading back to the Palm Woods. Mr. Mitchell was watching Logan as he drove. Logan glanced over for a second blushing when he noticed his father was watching him.

"What?" Mr. Mitchell chuckled and smiled.

"Nothing. It's just that I haven't seen you in so long and you've gotten so big."

"Dad it's only been a couple of months. You act like I've been gone for ten years." Mr. Mitchell and Logan laughed a little but soon Logan's dad's expression became sad.

"It felt like it was that long. It gets really lonely without you and your friends around. I actually started to miss Carlos breaking things around the house." Logan chuckled and slowed the car to a stop as they came to a red light.

"He did used to break a lot of stuff. Remember when he ate all the sugar while watching mighty mouse. He was so convinced he could fly that he jumped off the counter and landed on the table breaking it in half. (1)" Mr. Mitchell and Logan started laughing loudly at the memory.

"That's right. I think that was the first time I ever yelled at Carlos. I swear Kendall, James, and Carlos were around so much it was like they were my sons as well. I think I was more worried about him then the kitchen table." Mr. Mitchell turned to Logan who had started driving again. They had reached the Palm Woods and Logan had pulled into a parking spot. "You've become quiet the driver Logan." Logan rubbed the back of his neck blushing. They climbed out of the car and started walking back to inside.

"How long do you think you can stay dad." Mr. Mitchell thought about it for a moment then shrugged.

"I don't know Logan. I wouldn't want to be a bother to Mrs. Knight so I shouldn't stay long.

"You wouldn't be a bother! And I'm sure if it really bothered you Gustavo could get you a hotel. There's one right across the street." Mr. Mitchell could see the desperation in his son's eyes.

"I'm sorry Logan. I would have visited sooner if I knew you missed me so much." Logan shook his head at his dad.

"It's not your fault. I always told you I was fine on the phone anyway. Mr. Mitchell sighed thinking. He stayed silent until they reached the elevator. Once inside a thought came to him. He smirked and turned to Logan.

"You know what. I like LA. Maybe I'll move here for a while." Logan immediately brightened.

"Really!"

"Sure. I could find an apartment nearby. That way I can help Mrs. Knight take care of you four and I'll be around a lot more." Logan continued to smile but he soon frowned.

"What about your job?" Mr. Mitchell ruffled Logan's hair as they entered 2J.

"Let me worry about that." When they walked into the apartment Logan was immediately tackled to the ground. Mr. Mitchell watched blinking as Logan pushed Carlos off of him.

"Carlos! What the fu…"

"LANGUAGE!" Logan blushed.

"Sorry mama Knight. Carlos what are you doing?" Carlos sat up quickly.

"Thank god your back! I never realized how boring it is without you around! No one was yelling at me whenever I tried to do something fun. Logan sat up staring at Carlos weirdly.

"Are you telling me, me yelling at you to not do something makes doing what I don't want you to do more fun?" Carlos nodded his head vigorously. Logan sighed standing up. "You're a strange one Carlitos." Carlos pouted following Logan to the living room were Kendall and James were. Logan smiled and plopped down next to Kendall cuddling up to him. Kendall smiled and kissed Logan on the cheek.

"Hey babe, I missed you." Logan smiled laying his head against Kendall's shoulder.

"I missed you too." Logan looked up at Kendall with a giant smirk. "Guess what." Kendall turned to Logan chuckling softly at his enthusiasm.

"What?"

"My dad said he wants to move to LA so he can stay close." Kendall smiled at Logan kissing his nose.

"That's great Logie." Logan laid his head back down sighing softly.

"Yea… I missed him." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows in concern hearing something in Logan's voice.

"Logan, you ok?" Logan let out a shaky sigh.

"Yea. It's just that today was fun but I know it would have been better if it wasn't just the two of us." Kendall watched Logan sadly. Today always made him think of stuff like that. Kendall sat up causing Logan to sit up as well.

"Let's go into our room and get ready for bed." Logan furrowed his eyebrows but followed Kendall. They both said goodnight to everyone before walking into their room. After they got into their pajamas Kendall grabbed Logan's hand and sat him down on the bed. "Logan, I know you missed your mom but you keep forgetting how she treated you. Do you really think today would have been better if she was still around?" Logan looked at his hands biting his lip.

"I don't know, maybe. Maybe if she hadn't died we could have gotten her help. She could have gone to rehab to help her stop drinking. She was a good mom when she was sober." Kendall sighed gripping Logan's hands.

"I know," Kendall let out a sigh, when Logan said that Kendall desperately wanted to say _"When was your mom sober?"_ but Kendall wasn't about to hurt Logan like that. "You can't live your life thinking about what if. Your dad is here for you and the good mom you know your mom was is watching over you." Logan sighed and nodded. "Ok, let's go to bed." Kendall went to go to his bed but was stopped by Logan gripping his shirt. He turned around to see the saddest puppy dog eyes he has ever seen. Kendall wanted to "aw" so bad but then he remember only chicks did that. Kendall crawled into bed wrapping his arms around Logan. Logan sighed and snuggled into Kendall's warmth.

"Goodnight Kendall, I love you."

"Goodnight Logan, I love you too." After a few moments they both drifted off to sleep.

* * *

During the two weeks that followed Logan spent a lot of time with his dad. He would get breakfast with his dad then spend most of the day with Kendall, James, and Carlos in the recording studio. Then he would spend some time telling his dad about his day. On one of the days Kendall, James, Carlos and Logan had all gone with Logan's dad to help him look for apartments in the area. They found a perfect one that was down the street from the Palm Woods.

At the current time Logan was sitting on the couch watching TV with James, Carlos and Kendall. He had realized at some point during the week that he hadn't heard from Mr. Fin about Ryan so he figured she would be calling soon. Mr. Mitchell had gone to pay the deposit on his new apartment and Mrs. Knight had taken Katie out somewhere leaving the boys in the apartment alone. Carlos sighed and threw the remote down on his lap.

"Ok, I'm bored." The other three nodded in agreement.

"What do you want to do?" James asked.

"We could go to the pool… We haven't gone in a while." James, Logan, and Carlos agreed with Kendall and got up to get ready. Before Logan could get to his room the phone rang. He walked over to the phone and picked it up.

"Hello?"

"_Is this Logan Mitchell?"_ Logan furrowed his eyebrows. He had expected it to be Ms. Fin.

"Yes, who's this?"

"_This is Officer Martin. I'm calling you to give you a heads up. I'm sending some officers to your residence."_ Logan swallowed hard. His heart rate sped up as he thought about the meaning of what Officer Martin was saying.

"W-why?" Logan was shaking and gripping on to the phone so hard his knuckles were white.

"_Ryan somehow escaped from custody when he was being transported back to jail from the hospital. It seems that he is going after anyone who was involved in his trail."_ The officer paused and let out a sigh. _"We were unable to save Marry Jay Fin and Anne Stewart."_ Logan leaned against the counter as he felt his legs begin to buckle. He covered his mouth with his hand shaking uncontrollably.

"Oh my god…" Logan tried to regain his composure but he found breathing nearly impossible. "H-he killed them?" The officer sighed heavily.

"_I'm afraid so. We don't know his whereabouts at the current moment but he was last spotted about two hours from your location. I believe he was looking for members of the jury. Anyway, my officers should be arriving in about 20 minutes."_

"Ok." Logan said goodbye to the officer and heard a click signaling that he had hung up. Logan didn't move at all. When Kendall, James and Carlos walked into the room laughing Logan was still holding the phone to his ear. James put his hands out stopping the other two from walking any further.

"Logan?" Kendall glanced at Logan becoming alarmed when he realized Logan was hyperventilating. Kendall dropped his things and ran to Logan's side. James and Carlos stood on the right and left of Kendall watching with concern. Kendall took the phone from Logan's hand and gave it to James. He then gripped Logan's shoulders trying to get his attention.

"Logan. What. Happened?" Logan glanced around the room gasping for breath. Tears began streaming down Logan's face and his body shook with unimaginable fear.

"He killed them… h-he killed them… h-h-he k-killed them…" Kendall furrowed his eyebrows looking back at James and Carlos who were just as confused as him.

"Logan what are you talking about?" Logan continued to stare into space chanting. Kendall grew even more alarmed when he realized Logan was having trouble breathing. "Logan, listen to me. Calm. Down." Logan slid down to the floor as he gasped for breath.

"I can't… I can't breathe." James and Carlos started freaking out looking around the room for something to help Logan. Kendall gripped Logan's face making him look into Kendall's eyes.

"Logan you have to calm down. Just breathe!" Logan continued gasping for breath. Kendall was ready to get up and take Logan to the hospital when Mr. Mitchell walked in. James and Carlos ran over to him.

"MR. MITCHELL! IT"S LOGAN!" Before either of them could finish Logan's dad ran over to Kendall and his son. He knelt down gripping Logan's arm.

"What's going on?" Kendall turned to him clearly distraught.

"I don't know! He started hyperventilating after he talked to someone on the phone. He can't breathe!" Mr. Mitchell shot up and ran to Logan's room. When he came back he had Logan's inhaler which had been thankfully placed on Logan's dresser in plain sight. He knelt down next to Logan and placed his hand on Logan's back leaning him forward. He put the inhaler to Logan's lips pressing down on it. He rubbed Logan's back as Logan closed his eyes tightly and breathed in deeply. After a few minutes Mr. Mitchell lowered the inhaler sighing with relief as Logan started breathing normally again. James and Carlos stood behind Kendall and Mr. Mitchell as Kendall gripped Logan's arm.

"Logan, what happened?" Logan pulled his legs to his chest wrapping his arms around his knees. He rocked himself back and forth as small sobs came out.

"There dead… he killed them…" Kendall sighed with frustration.

"Who's dead? Who killed them?" Logan looked to Kendall with fear in his eyes.

"RYAN! He got out somehow and he's going around killing people. He killed his lawyer and he killed Ms. Fin. That's why she hasn't called back!" Everyone gasped. Kendall sat back eyes wide while James and Carlos leaned against the kitchen counter.

"Oh my god…" Mr. Mitchell couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"How do you know, Logan?" Logan swallowed looking up at James.

"That was a police officer who called. He said he was sending over officers but that they were unable to get to Ms. Fin and Mrs. Stewart in time." Logan placed his chin on his knees and closed his eyes tightly.

"When are the officers getting here?"

"20 minutes." Mr. Mitchell stood up and helped Logan up. He led him over to the couch and sat him down. He knelt in front of him rubbing his arms.

"Sit here. I'm packing you some clothes you're not staying here." Logan looked at his dad wide eyed.

"W-what?"

"Ryan knows where you are. He doesn't know where my apartment is. It's not furnished but it's safer. Once the officers come I suggest we all take some clothes and head over there. Everyone nodded. Mr. Mitchell grabbed the phone and handed it to Kendall. "Kendall call your mother. You sit with Logan; I'll pack your clothes. James, Carlos go pack." Everyone nodded and went to work. Kendall pulled Logan tightly to him as he called his mother.

"Mom, we have a problem. You need to come home now." Kendall said goodbye and hung up the phone. 'She'll be home in five minutes." Logan nodded and buried his face in Kendall's shirt. Kendall squeezed Logan and kissed the top of his head. "Everything is going to be ok." By the time Mrs. Knight and Katie arrived home everyone was packed already. Mr. Mitchell informed her of what was going on quickly then helped her pack her things and Katie's things. When everything was done a knock came to the door. Mr. Mitchell answered it and stepped aside for the officers. The three officers looked around confused.

"We decided it would be safer to stay somewhere else." Mr. Mitchell stated. "I recently bought an apartment and Ryan doesn't know about it. I thought it would be safer than staying here considering Ryan knows Logan is here at the Palm Woods. The officers nodded and helped carry some bags. They didn't take much but they did take enough cloths to last about two weeks, if they needed anything else they could send freight train to their apartment or something. When they reached Mr. Mitchells apartment they all placed their bags on the floor. Mr. Mitchell was happy he decided to go with the three bed room apartment.

"We should probably call Gustavo and tell him what's going on." Kendall whipped out his phone and called Kelly. After explaining what was going on for a couple of minutes he hung up. "Kelly said she is going to come over. Everyone nodded.

After two hours of sitting on the floor in silence a knock came to the door. Mr. Mitchell opened the door raising an eyebrow and stepping aside. Everyone watched as movers walked in with furniture. Kelly walked in and stood to the side as more movers brought in stuff.

"Kelly, what's all this?"

"Gustavo didn't want you staying somewhere that wasn't furnished yet so he bought your dad some furniture." Logan blinked and glanced at his dad who was watching in amazement.

"Oh… well that was nice of him." Kelly nodded at Mr. Mitchell as the last moving guy came in. She turned to everyone smiling.

"Well there you go; you have beds, couches and everything else you'll need." Kelly pointed towards the door as freight train walked in. "He will be staying with you guys as well as the officers." Mr. Mitchell's eyes widened as he looked up at freight train.

"Wow…" Kendall, James, Carlos and Logan chuckled softly at Mr. Mitchell's reaction. Kelly said goodbye and left the apartment. Kendall sighed and turned to everyone.

"So… now what do we do?"

**A/N: OH NOES! Ryan's loose! And yea I killed Mrs. Stewart. I'm sure most of you are happy about that but I also killed Ms. Fin… sorry. I'm pretty sure most of you liked her =[**

**Anyway!**

**There is more to come!**

**(1): haha… my mom did that. When she was little she lived in Puerto Rico. She used to watch Mighty Mouse and she decided she could fly so she jumped of the kitchen table yelling ME LLAMO MIGHTLY MOUSE! Lol. She didn't break anything but she got a nasty bump on her head. My brother and I tease her about it all the time =]**


	30. well this sucks

**A/N: 30 CHAPTERS! Woo!**

Kendall, James, and Carlos sprinted down the street. They were all breathing heavily from the effort but they were willing themselves to go faster. Kendall made a sharp turn into a parking lot with James and Carlos right behind them. They dashed down the path dodging cars as they almost hit them. They were running so fast Kendall almost ran right into the door because it wasn't opening quickly enough. He ran inside the hospital ignoring the protests from the people around him. His body slammed into the front desk causing the receptionist to jump slightly.

"Hi I'm looking for…" Before Kendall could finish he heard someone call his name.

"Mr. Knight." Kendall turned to see Dr. Wells walking toward James, Carlos, and him. They all ran over to Dr. Wells gasping for breath.

"Where is he?" Dr. Wells face saddened causing Kendall to take in a breath.

"I'm sorry boys… he didn't make it." Their eyes widened in shock.

"No…" James said through a whisper."

"Oh god… Logan…" Carlos ran his hands through his hair. Kendall kept his eyes to the ground clenching his fists. How did it come to this?

* * *

It had been three days since they left the Palm Woods and Ryan still hadn't been caught. To their fear Ryan had been spotted nearby but that also meant he was close to getting caught. The four boys never left Mr. Mitchell's apartment except for when they went to the recording studio. It was really boring but they rather be bored then dead. James, Carlos, Katie and Mrs. Knight were watching TV while Logan, Kendall, and Mr. Mitchell played chess. Kendall was just starting to play so it wasn't a surprise that he had lost to Logan ten times already. Kendall preferred to watch because of that. Both Mr. Mitchell and Logan were excellent at the game. Kendall could never tell what either of their next moves were and the game was neck and neck. Just from watching the two Kendall could tell where Logan got his traits from. His dad was smart, caring, sensitive, and considerate just like Logan. He liked to analyze everything and consider the pros and cons of something before doing it like Logan did. Unfortunately, Logan received some traits from his mother as well. Kendall knew as they got older he was going to have to watch out for Logan because the addictive trait was there. If Logan liked something he wanted a lot of it. The good thing is that all the things Logan gets addicted to are innocent reading, TV, YouTube, ice tea. But when Logan gets older… Kendall doesn't even want to think about the possibilities.

"Checkmate." Kendall snapped out of his thoughts to see Logan doing his trademark half smile half frown at his dad. That was another thing Logan had gotten from his mother. It was probably one of the only good traits. Kendall always thought it was cute when Logan did that. Mr. Mitchell let out a sigh but was smiling.

"I guess you won. The student has surpassed the master." Kendall, Logan, and Mr. Mitchell laughed. Mrs. Knight and Katie suddenly stood up from the couch causing everyone to look at them.

"I have to take Katie to some auditions so we better get going. Mr. Mitchell stood up and escorted them to the door. The four boys watched as Mrs. Knight and Mr. Mitchell stopped by the door to talk for a moment. They couldn't exactly hear what they were saying but they could see the seriousness in their expressions. Mr. Mitchell handed Mrs. Knight a small black object. Kendall immediately recognized it as pepper spray making a feeling of worry travel through him. He never really thought about his mom and sister being in danger because Ryan wasn't after them but there was always a chance. Kendall could vaguely hear his mother thank Logan's dad then hear him reply with "stay safe." Kendall watched as his family left closing the door behind them. Kendall felt something grip his hand turning to see Logan watching him.

"They'll be ok Kendall." Kendall sighed and nodded. Before anyone could say anything else they heard a loud yelp from the bathroom. They all stood in alarm as the three officers and freight train burst in. Logan looked around becoming frantic.

"JAMES!" Before any of them could freak out James came bursting into the room.

"WHO USED ALL OF MY CUDA MASSIVE HOLD?" Everyone sighed with relief then glared at James. The three officers walked back outside followed by freight train.

"JAMES! We thought something bad happened to you! You scared me to death!" Logan exclaimed. James walked over to Logan holding the empty can up and shaking it in his face.

"Yea something bad did happen! My Cuda massive hold is all gone!" James looked at Logan for a moment then narrowed his eyes. "You hair is looking nice and in place today… IT WAS YOU!" Logan yelped as James lunged at him.

"IT WASN"T ME I SWEAR!" Logan dodged James again then ran behind Kendall. Kendall placed a hand on James chest stopping him in his tracks.

"It was me ok." James gasped then glared at Kendall. Kendall rolled his eyes at James. "I'll get you more ok. We can go right now." Logan walked out from behind Kendall giving them a concerned look.

"I don't know about that Kendall." Kendall sighed and wrapped his arm around Logan's waist.

"Don't worry we'll go straight to the store then come back." Kendall could tell by Logan's expression that he still wasn't convinced. "Carlos, why don't you come with us?" Carlos nodded and jumped up. "Me, James, and Carlos will go to the store and you can stay here with your dad." Logan thought about it for a moment but finally nodded his head. Kendall kissed Logan's cheek before grabbing his wallet and heading out the door. Logan sighed and plopped down on the couch.

"Logan you hungry?" Logan looked up at his dad and nodded. His dad walked towards the kitchen and stopped at the entrance. "Why don't you ask those officers and freight train if they want anything?" Logan nodded and walked over to the door. As soon as he opened it the four men standing outside looked at him.

"Hey do you want something to eat?" They looked at each other before nodding.

"Sure thanks kid." The officer reached behind him and picked up two soda cans handing them to Logan.

"We bought these outside you and your dad can have these two. Logan thanked them. The officer waved at Logan as he chugged his drink. Logan walked back inside and walked into the kitchen. He placed one of the drinks by his dad who was making sandwiches and the other in the frig for later.

"The officer gave me that as a thank you for the food. Mr. Mitchell smiled and finished making the last of the sandwiches. Logan sat down and began to eat as his dad walked to the door and gave the four men outside their food. When he walked back in he was taking a large sip of the soda. He placed it on the counter and ate his sandwich with Logan.

"I think I'm a little tired. I'm going to take a nap." Logan nodded at his father as he walked off. Logan sighed and looked around the kitchen.

"When is this all going to end?" Logan thought out loud to himself. Before Logan could think anymore he heard several loud thuds coming from the other room. Logan furrowed his brow and started walking out of the kitchen. "Dad?"

* * *

Kendall sighed heavily as his two friends argued behind him. They had just walked out of the apartment complex and James and Carlos suddenly got into a heated conversation about who was more epic, Dumbledore or Gandalf.

"How could you think anyone is more epic then Gandalf?" Carlos exclaimed. James scoffed looking at Carlos like he was crazy.

"Dumbledore is the best wizard in the world. Of course he is more epic then Gandalf.

"Are you insane? Gandalf is like thousands of years old and he can still kick ass better than most people. Also, he doesn't need a wand like Dumbledore does. Dumbledore is useless without a wand."

"Dumbledore can create a giant tornado of fire."

"Gandalf defeated a giant fire monster!"

"Gandalf stinks!"

"At least Gandalf isn't dead!" James and Carlos glared at each other growling slightly. Kendall finally had enough and turned around facing his friends.

"How about we both agree that Gandalf and Dumbledore are equally epic characters and if they fought side by side to defeat evil it would be the most epic fight ever." James and Carlos both smiled and nodded. Kendall sighed with relief and walked into the store. They walked down the aisles several times before James discovered with dismay that they didn't have the Cuda Massive hold. He walked over to an employee and tapped her on the shoulder.

"Excuse me do you have any more of the Cuda massive hold?" She nodded and motioned for the three boys to follow her. She went to the back where there was a large closet. James, Kendall, and Carlos watched by the door as she walked in and tried to reach for a box on the top shelf. The girl jumped several times but just couldn't reach. James walked over smiling. "I can get it." She smiled gratefully at him then walked back towards the entrance of the closet.

"Thanks bring that to the front when you're done." James nodded and reached for the box. He opened it and grabbed three containers of the Cuda Massive hold. Kendall walked over to him with Carlos right behind him.

"I didn't say I would buy you three of those things." James narrowed his eyes at Kendall.

"Hey you're the one who used it so you have to suffer the consequences." Before Kendall could reply they heard a voice from behind them.

"That sounds about right." The three boys turned around gasping.

"Ryan!" Ryan smirked evilly.

"Hello Kendall." Ryan gripped the door. "Goodbye Kendall." He slammed it closed locking it. Kendall, James, and Carlos ran over to the door trying to open it. James shook the handle while Kendall and Carlos banged on the door.

"FUCK!"

* * *

Logan walked into the living room gasping when he spotted his dad lying on the floor. "DAD!" He ran to his father's side and began shaking him. Logan continued to shake his father but he wouldn't wake up.

"Don't worry, he's not dead." Logan looked up sliding back slightly when he spotted Ryan standing in the corner of the room.

"H-how…"

"How did I get here…? How did I know where you where…. How did I get passed your security… those are very good questions." Ryan took a few steps forward. "Well you see I just happened to be in the area and I spotted you and your friends walking out of here and into the limo you love so much. It was simple to figure out what room number you were and then everything else just fell into place. Selling spiked soda to make your friends outside and that one there fall asleep, following those three losers to the store then locking them in a closet in the back of the store, and finally…" Ryan took a few more steps so he was standing right in front of Logan. "Coming back here just in time to find everyone passed out except for you. Ryan smirk grew at the fear in Logan's eyes. "I'm going to enjoy this." He reached down and grabbed Logan's shirt.

**A/N: DUN DUN DUN! Oh noes! What's going on! Lol well I hope you enjoyed this chapter. And Ryan wasn't at two places at once. He sold the soda to the officers then followed Kendall, James, and Carlos and locked them in a closet. Then he walked back to the apartment and confronted Logan. =] anyway!**

**There is more to come! **


	31. sacrifice the brave to save the kind

"DAM IT DOESN"T ANYONE SHOP IN THIS STORE!" Kendall slammed his fist into the door breathing heavily with anger. They had been in this stupid closet for at least 30 minutes and it didn't look like they would be getting out any time soon. It didn't make any sense though. The closet wasn't in a secluded area in the back of the store. It was right next to the milk section. People buy milk all the time. Kendall pulled on the handle once more then screamed with frustration and started kicking the door furiously. He sounded like a three year old but he didn't care, for all he knew Logan was dying. James and Carlos were sitting against the wall staring into space. They both were thinking the same thing but neither of them really wanted to believe it. It only took them 5 minutes to get to the store. It would have taken then a minute to pay then five minutes to get back. That's around 10 minutes. Logan would have called at the ten minute mark to make sure they were ok. They had been in the closet for 30 minutes and Logan never called them. Carlos hung his head trying to hide the tears that began to fall. Logan was probably dead. Kendall finally stopped kicking the door and let out a screaming sob. He sank down to the floor grabbing the door handle while he sobbed. "Logan… please don't die."

* * *

"GET OFF ME!" Logan kicked Ryan in the leg causing him to release his hold on Logan's shirt. Logan quickly glanced at his father who was still passed out on the floor. Without wasting any more time Logan took off running. Logan jumped over the couch heading towards the bedrooms. He entered one not bother to close the door because there was another door that connected to the bathroom. He ran in the bathroom then out another door ending up in his father's bed room. Logan closed the bathroom door deciding he had run enough to close a door behind him. He jumped back when he heard Ryan run into the door. Logan then ran across the room and shut the bedroom door. He locked it and stepped back a few feet. Logan was gasping for breath as he looked around the room. He could hear Ryan banging on the door trying to get it. Logan ran over to his father's closet and swiftly opened it. There had to be something he could use as a weapon. Logan moved some things around and discovered some pepper spray. Logan took it and put it in his pocket. He also grabbed a bat from the back of the closet. When Logan turned facing the room he realized the banging had stopped. He walked slowly towards the entrance to the bathroom and put his ear against it. He strained to hear but he couldn't hear anything. Logan didn't want to open the door until he knew where Ryan was so he walked over to the other door and put his ear against it. He was listening hard when suddenly a pain came to his cheek. Logan screamed falling backwards and landing on the floor. The wetness on his cheek revealing he was bleeding.

"Oh sorry Logan did I hit you?" Logan stared up at the door to see a knife sticking through the wood slightly. The knife was pulled out and plunged into the wood again. The good thing was now that Ryan was doing that Logan knew where he was. The bad thing was Ryan had a knife. Logan quickly and quietly got to his feet and walked over to the bathroom door. He kept his eyes on the bedroom door to make sure Ryan was still trying to force it open. Logan waited until Ryan stabbed the door to unlock the bathroom door. Then he waited for Ryan to stab the door again to open it. Logan closed the bathroom door behind him so Ryan wouldn't know right away that he wasn't in that room anymore when he eventually got in. Logan crept over to the other room until he was peeking into the small hall. He could see Ryan banging on the door and Logan didn't know if he should run up behind him and hit him or try and make a break for it. Logan glanced into the living room towards the door but remembered his father. He couldn't leave his father behind. If Logan got away Ryan would probably kill him in anger. Logan took a breath deciding the best action was to attack Ryan from behind. He whipped out the pepper spray and readied the bat only to be staring into raging eyes when he turned the corner.

* * *

Another 30 minutes went by and James couldn't take it anymore. No one was opening the door; they had no cell service and no more options. James stood up and roughly pushed Kendall away from the door. He gripped the selves on either side of him and started ramming his foot into the door. Pain traveled from James' foot up his leg but he didn't care. James clenched his teeth and continued kicking. After a few minutes he was going to give up when he suddenly heard a cracking sound. Kendall and Carlos immediately looked up to see a dent in the door. The both quickly stood up and started kicking the door just like James. They didn't care how hard they had to work they were going to get out of there.

* * *

Logan screamed as he was thrown across the room. His bat and pepper spray landing somewhere near Ryan's feet. Logan sat up only to be pushed back down when Ryan placed his foot on Logan's chest. Logan cringed as Ryan pressed down.

"You probably thought it was all over. I bet you thought that I would never show up again. Well you were wrong." Ryan pressed down harshly on Logan's chest making him scream in pain. "You're going to pay for what you did to me." A sudden cracking noise was followed by an agonizing scream. Ryan smirked at Logan and removed his foot from Logan's chest. Logan was sobbing as the pain consumed him. "Opps, I guess I broke a rib." Logan flinched at Ryan's mocking voice. Ryan suddenly kicked Logan in the stomach causing him to double over in pain.

"STOP! AH! STOP!" Ryan laughed loving Logan's screams of pain. Logan turned onto his side curling in on himself. He continued to sob as Ryan moved from kicking his stomach to kicking his back and legs. Logan opened his eyes noticing a black object. The pepper spray was only a few feet from him and he could get it. Logan rolled onto his stomach so he was closer to the spray. He tried to make it seem like he was trying to get away from Ryan's kicking so Ryan wouldn't take the spray away from him. When Logan finally rolled so he was lying on top of the spray he gripped it in his hand. He looked over at Ryan who was standing watching Logan.

"I hope you're suffering Logan." Ryan knelt down next to Logan and grabbed him by the hair roughly. "I'm going to make sure you suffer. First I'm going to beat you, then I'm going to fuck you, then… I'm going to kill you." Logan suddenly turned and sprayed Ryan in the face. Ryan fell back screaming as the pepper spray entered his eyes. "YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Logan clenched his teeth as he stood up. He had to get away. Logan had crawled a few feet away when he was roughly pulled back. Logan screamed clawing at the floor in a desperate attempt to get away from Ryan. Ryan straddled Logan's hips and punched Logan in the jaw. Ryan took the knife that he had stuck in his pocket and started ripping Logan's shirt with it. Logan screamed in pain as the knife dug into his skin as well as his shirt. When Ryan ripped the shirt in half he pulled it back and ran his hands over Logan's bleeding chest. He then proceeded to grab Logan's pants roughly and begin to take them off.

"No… no… no…" Logan sobbed as Ryan undid his zipper.

"Your mine." Ryan was about to pull Logan's pants off when movement caught his eye. He looked up to see a gun pointed right at him. Mr. Mitchell was standing a few feet away breathing heavily and glaring with murderous intent.

"Hey asshole, get the fuck away from my son." Mr. Mitchell pulled the trigger watching as Ryan was hit in the chest. Logan was wide eyed as he looked at the lifeless form above him. Logan pushed Ryan off of him and pushed himself a few feet away. Mr. Mitchell ran to his son's side and dropped the gun on the floor. He pulled Logan into a tight hug breathing a sigh of relief. Logan was in pain but at this moment he didn't care. He was just happy to be in the safety of his father's arms. Logan let out loud sobs as what just happened truly crashed down on him. Mr. Mitchell tightened his grip on Logan and ran his fingers through his hair. "It's ok, you're ok."

"Papa I was so scared!" Mr. Mitchell sat with Logan for another minute then helped Logan off the floor.

"We better call the police." Logan nodded his head wincing slightly from pain. Mr. Mitchell had taken a few steps but turned around when he heard a sound. His eyes widened and Logan suddenly found himself being pushed to the ground. He heard the sound of a gun going off as he hit the floor. Logan looked around for a moment not sure what just happened. Ryan was holding a gun up but after a few moments his eyes glazed over and he dropped back down with a sickening thud. Logan could tell he was dead. Logan looked himself over and quickly realized he hadn't been shot. When he looked up he gasped loudly tears coming to his eyes.

"DAD!" Logan crawled over to his dad who was lying on the floor gasping for breath. His shirt was beginning to stick to him as blood seeped out of his wound. "Dad, can you hear me?" Mr. Mitchell looked up at Logan and nodded. Logan looked around quickly then grabbed the phone from the table and dialed 911. He spoke to the dispatcher for a quick moment then hung up. Logan grabbed a towel and pressed it to his dad's wounds. "Dad you have to stay with me." Mr. Mitchell opened his eyes and stared up at his son. He went to close his eyes again but Logan pushed on his shoulder slightly. "Papa please…" Mr. Mitchell looked up at Logan's sad face and smiled.

"It's been years since you called me that." Logan looked down at his father wide eyed.

"What?"

"You stopped calling me papa when you were 14. I never told you but I was actually sad when you started calling me dad because it meant you were growing up. You weren't a baby anymore." Mr. Mitchell grabbed one of Logan's hands tears coming to his eyes. "I love you Logan." Logan let out a loud sob.

"Don't say stuff like that you're not going anywhere!" Before Mr. Mitchell could say anything else paramedics burst into the room. They surrounded Logan and his father separating them when they loaded Mr. Mitchell onto a stretcher. Logan watched sobbing as his father was taken away from him. Suddenly his vision of the door was blocked by a paramedic.

"Son we have to get you to the hospital." Logan shook out of the paramedic's grip suddenly remembering something.

"Wait! I have to call my friends and make sure there ok!" Logan grabbed his phone and quickly dialed Kendall.

* * *

After 10 minutes of kicking James, Kendall, and Carlos finally broke through the door. The stumbled out looking around to see people staring at them. Kendall was suddenly filled with rage as he looked at them.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE! WE"VE BEEN STUCK IN THERE FOR OVER AN HOUR AND YOU DON'T TRY TO HELP!" Kendall was about to say more when his phone suddenly rang. He pulled it out of his pocket eyes widening when he realized who it was.

"Logan!"

"_K-Kendall!" _Logan was sobbing into the phone and Kendall could vaguely hear other voices in the background.

"Logan are you ok."

"_Yea… I'll live. I'm being taken to the hospital and…" _Logan trailed off as another sob was forced out.

"What is it?"

"_Ryan shot my dad. I don't know if he's going to make it!"_ Kendall tried to remain calm for Logan's sake.

"What happened to Ryan?

"_He's dead."_ Kendall could hear someone talking to Logan. _"Kendall I have to go. Please meet me at the hospital." _

"I'll be there soon." Kendall hung up and started sprinting out the door without saying anything to James or Carlos. "COME ON LETS GO!"

**A/N: I don't really have much to say other then I hope you enjoyed the chapter**

**There is more to come!**


	32. suffering

"Mr. Mitchell you have to rest." Logan tried sitting up again but was pushed back down by a nurse. He glared at her and tried to stand up again.

"NO THE ONLY THING I NEED TO DO IS SEE MY DAD!" Logan slapped the nurse's hands away and jumped off the bed.

"You can't leave this room! Please lay down!"

"NO!" Before Logan and the nurse could argue anymore a very familiar doctor walked in.

"What is going on in here?" Dr. Wells face immediately softened when he spotted Logan. "Logan… please lay down."

"No! I need to see my dad!" Dr. Wells could see the tears beginning to spring up in Logan's eyes. He sighed and moved over to Logan's side.

"Your dad is in intensive care. Lay down for a moment and I'll see to it that you are brought to him." Logan stared at the doctor for a moment then reluctantly nodded. Dr. Wells helped Logan back into bed then quickly walked off. The nurse gave Logan a fake smile while she readjusted his bedding.

"See that wasn't so hard." Logan glared at the woman. He wasn't in the mood for politeness.

"Oh shut the fuck up." The nurse gasped and angrily stomped out the door. After 15 minutes of waiting Dr. Wells came back into the room. He brought in a wheel chair and wordlessly helped Logan into it. Logan didn't say anything but he could see sadness in Dr. Wells' eyes. Dr. Wells wheeled Logan down the hall. It felt like it had taken them forever to get to Logan's father's room but it had only been a couple of minutes. Before they entered Dr. Wells moved from behind Logan and stood in front of him.

"Dr. Wells?" Dr. Wells sighed and gave Logan a sympathetic look.

"I'm afraid… your father didn't make it." Logan's eyes widened.

"W-what?"

"I'm sorry we did all we could." Logan immediately stood up ignoring the pain. Dr. Wells opened his mouth to protest but decided not to say anything. He watched sadly as Logan slowly walked into his father's room. When Dr. Wells was sure he wasn't going to fall over and hurt himself he left Logan alone. Logan walked over to his dad's bed and sat down on it. He looked his dad up and down noticing the pale color to his skin. Logan went to hold his father's hand but pulled back startled by the coldness. Logan grabbed his father's shoulders shaking him slightly.

"Papa… please… please wake up." Logan's father didn't move. His eyes remained closed causing tears to fall from Logan's eyes. "Papa… please... you can't leave me." Logan tried to shake his father awake again. "Papa… no…" He shook his shoulders again. "No…" Logan shook his father one last time. "NO!" Logan laid his head on his father's chest and began to sob uncontrollably. "Please come back papa!" Logan grabbed his father's hand and held it to his chest. Sobs ripped through his body causing him unimaginably physical pain but he didn't care. The world was crashing down on him making ever breath he took harder and harder to manage. He squeezed his father's hand as blackness and sorrow began to settle around him. Logan's sobs were becoming so loud and uncontrollable people down the hall could hear him. The unimaginable pain in his sobs and pleas were so heart retching people who didn't even know what had happened couldn't help but shed a tear. "Please come back papa! I need you!"

* * *

Kendall, James, and Carlos sprinted down the street. They were all breathing heavily from the effort but they were willing themselves to go faster. Kendall made a sharp turn into a parking lot with James and Carlos right behind them. They dashed down the path dodging cars as they almost hit them. They were running so fast Kendall almost ran right into the door because it wasn't opening quickly enough. He ran inside the hospital ignoring the protests from the people around him. His body slammed into the front desk causing the receptionist to jump slightly.

"Hi I'm looking for…" Before Kendall could finish he heard someone call his name.

"Mr. Knight." Kendall turned to see Dr. Wells walking toward James, Carlos, and him. They all ran over to Dr. Wells gasping for breath.

"Where is he?" Dr. Wells face saddened causing Kendall to take in a breath.

"I'm sorry boys… he didn't make it." Their eyes widened in shock.

"No…" James said through a whisper."

"Oh god… Logan…" Carlos ran his hands through his hair. Kendall kept his eyes to the ground clenching his fists. How did it come to this? Kendall glanced back up at Dr. Wells with tears in his eyes.

"What about Logan?" He sighed and motioned for them to follow him.

"Logan is fine... physically. He did however, obtain some injuries. He suffered four cracked ribs, his stomach, back, and legs are badly bruised, and he has a long cut going down his chest." As they walked through another door people seemed to be standing around listening to something. They all had expressions of pain and sympathy for the loud sobs that moved throughout the hall. Kendall's eyes widened when he recognized who it was.

"LOGAN!" Kendall started running down the hall with James and Carlos right behind him. Kendall slowed down and stopped when they reached the door where the sobbing was coming from. Kendall slowly opened the door and walked in. Logan was on the bed laying his head down on his father's chest. He was gripping his father's hand to his chest as sobs of pure pain and agony came ripping through him. Kendall quickly made his way over to Logan glancing for a second at the lifeless form he was clinging to. Kendall felt the sting of tears but he couldn't cry. Logan needed him but it was too hard. Tears fell down Kendall's face as he reached out for Logan's hand. Logan opened his eyes when he felt a hand on his. Kendall tried to pull Logan away from his dad but Logan jerked out of his grip.

"NO!"

"Logan…"

"He can't be gone… he can't! He can't… no! Please come back! Please!" Kendall pulled Logan up and embraced him in a tight hug.

"Logan I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."

"NO!" Logan wrapped one arm around Kendall but still gripped his father with the other. He buried his face in Kendall's shirt muffling the sobs that seemed endless.

"I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." Kendall felt like a broken record but there was nothing else he could say. He shouldn't have left. He should have been there. If he was this could have ended differently. James and Carlos soon came over to Logan's side. They tried to pull Logan's hand from his father but he refused to let go. James and Carlos rubbed Logan's back as he continued to sob and as Kendall continued to apologize for something he couldn't control. When the door burst open Kendall, James, and Carlos looked towards the door to see Mrs. Knight and Katie standing there wide eyed. Mrs. Knight took in the scene in front of her and covered her mouth to suppress a small sob. Tears streamed down her face as she pulled Katie, who had also started crying, into a hug. Kendall glanced towards James and Carlos to see that they had started crying as well. Because of the close bond of the four boys their parents had become parents to all of them. Mrs. Knight was their over protective mother, Mr. Knight was the sports dad, Mr. Garcia was their wild and crazy dad, Mrs. Garcia was their happy and fun mother, Mr. Diamond was their cool and stylish dad, Mrs. Diamond was their energetic mother, and Mr. Mitchell had been their smart laid back father. Without Mr. Mitchell James, Carlos and Kendall felt like they had lost one of their fathers but they all knew they didn't understand the pain Logan was feeling now. Mr. Mitchell was like a father to them but they still had there actually fathers. Logan didn't have his father and he didn't have his mother either. Logan didn't have anyone. Logan turned his head and leaned against Kendall's shoulder. When he caught sight of his father's face he started sobbing even more. His father's eyes would never open again, he would never smile again, he would never give Logan words of wisdom or playfully tease Logan again, he would never be there for Logan again and ironically enough Logan needed his dad right now more than ever. Logan shut his eyes tightly hoping everything was just a dream and the pain would fade away. To his dismay it didn't and Logan cried even louder.

"This can't be happening." Kendall tightened his grip on Logan. He had never seen Logan in so much pain and it scared him. Kendall looked up at James and Carlos who were watching Logan with sad eyes, they were scared too. Mrs. Knight composed herself and sat Katie down in a chair. She walked over to the boys hoping she could help them somehow. Before Mrs. Knight could say anything Dr. Wells walked into the room with two nurses behind him. They wheeled in a bed and placed it by the group.

"We are going to have to take Logan back to his room now. He's going to need time to rest." Kendall nodded and released his grip on Logan. He tried to release Logan's grip on his father but Logan wouldn't let go.

"Logan you have to go rest now, please let go." Kendall gently tugged on Logan's hand but Logan tightened his grip. He shook his head and began to sob more.

"No…" James and Carlos tried to lift Logan off of the bed but he pushed them away. "I said no!" Kendall, James, and Carlos watched sadly as Logan held his father's hand in both his hands. Kendall gently placed his hand over Logan's and tried to pry them open.

"Logan please… you need to rest." Logan shook his head making Kendall sigh with frustration. Dr. Wells sighed and walked over to Logan's side.

"Logan you have some bad injuries and you haven't been given any pain killers yet. You're going to give yourself a bad fever." Logan still didn't move making the doctor sigh. He turned to the two nurses signaling for them to get Logan. Kendall, James, Carlos, Mrs. Knight, and Katie watched horrified as the nurses forcefully and without remorse ripped Logan's hands away from his father. They pulled the bed towards Logan and lifted him onto it. Logan thrashed screaming for them to let him go. He managed to get one of his hands free and but he didn't try to get the nurses off of him. Logan reached his hand out to his father desperately trying to reach his hand. Logan stretched his arm as hard as he could but he only managed to lightly touch his father's hand with the tips of his fingers. Kendall watched wide eyed as one of the nurses grabbed Logan's hand before he could get a grip on his father. Dr. Wells came to the side of the bed and injected something into Logan's arm. Logan fought the medication as hard as he could. He didn't want to sleep and he didn't want to leave his father's side. Logan's limbs began to feel heavy but he managed to stay awake. It was harder for him to struggle but he still managed to. Dr. Wells injected more medication into Logan's arm and this time he couldn't fight it off. His eyes began to shut and his sobs quieted to silence. The two nurses released their hold on Logan and wheeled him out the door. Dr. Wells turned to the group who were still standing in the corner of the room shocked. "I'm sorry." Kendall could tell by the look on Dr. Wells face that he genuinely was sorry. If Logan wasn't hurt he would have let him stay as long as he wanted but he had to protect the health of the patient. "Follow me." They silently followed Dr. Wells out of the room and back down the hall. They could still see the two nurses slowly pushing Logan and everyone they passed looked at him sympathetically. When they reached Logan's room the nurses were just making their way back out. Kendall, James, and Carlos each took a seat by Logan's bed and stared at him. They didn't notice before but Logan's face was pale. He must have been in a lot more pain then they realized.

"Boys?" The three boys turned to Mrs. Knight who was standing by the door. "I'm going to make a few calls." They nodded as Mrs. Knight left with Katie right behind her. Kendall sighed heavily looking up when he heard sniffing. He thought it was Logan but when he realized Logan was still fast asleep he looked over to Carlos who had his head in his hands.

"This is so horrible." James wrapped his arm around Carlos' shoulder trying to comfort him.

"Yea… Kendall, what are we going to do?" Kendall sighed and dropped his gaze from James.

"I don't know."

**A/N: This made me sad. It made me think about my dad because he passed away. ='[ **

**Well anyway I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

**There is more to come.**


	33. not going anywhere

The next day Kendall, James, and Carlos were sitting by Logan's bed watching him sleep. He still hadn't woken up from the previous day because the doctor had given him such a large dosage. Mrs. Knight had taken the liberty to call James and Carlos' parents and she also called Kendall's dad. They had all flown out to California and were getting settled in their hotels before coming over to the hospital. The parents of the three boys wanted to be there for them but they also wanted to be there for Logan. It was obvious he wasn't handling the situation well at all. As they waited for Logan to wake up they mostly talked about what they would do for him. How would Logan react? Would he be angry, upset, depressed? They weren't sure and they weren't sure how they would handle it. Kendall sighed glancing at the clock. Their parents would be at the hospital any minute but he wasn't sure if it was such a good idea. Would being in a room surrounded by the parents of Logan's friends really help him? Probably not, it would only show Logan what he no longer had. For the first time in Kendall's life he didn't know what to do. He loved Logan but how could he help him? Kendall would never be able to take his pain away. The only good thing that came out of all of this was that Ryan was dead. He would never be able to hurt Logan again. The unfortunate thing was that Ryan's last act had given Logan a life time of hurt. James, Carlos and Kendall all looked up when the door to the room slowly opened. Their parents filed in giving their sons sad smiles. Carlos stood up and walked over to his dad. Their usual energetic reunion was replaced with a simple tight hug. Carlos buried his face in his father's chest crying silently. The thought of ever losing his dad frightened him but it also made him feel even worse for Logan. James quickly moved to his parents embracing them. He too was plagued with the thought of what he would feel if he ever lost them. Kendall walked over to his dad and hugged him. The thoughts that Carlos and James were having came but he quickly shook them away.

"Boys, can we go outside and talk." The three boys nodded and followed their parents outside. Kendall glanced over his shoulder checking to make sure Logan was still asleep before quietly closing the door. James, Kendall, and Carlos stood leaning against the wall awkwardly waiting for their parents to start talking. Their parents each shared worried looks before Mr. Garcia began.

"Boys, you're going to have to fill us in on Logan's condition. How is he?" Kendall sighed and looked up at Carlos' father.

"The doctor said he should be fine. He has a few cracked ribs and lots a bruising. He also has a long cut going down his chest and stomach." Kendall looked down at the ground biting his lip. "So he is physically ok." Their parents shared a look and turned to the boys again.

"How did he handle the news about his dad?" James looked up at his mother and let out a sigh.

"Not good… not good at all.

* * *

Logan could feel himself beginning to wake. He opened his eyes blinking a few times to adjust to the light. His muscles ached and his chest was on fire but the physical pain was nothing compared to the pain in his heart. Logan looked around the room and realized he was back in the room they had put him in when he first got to the hospital. Logan turned his head looking at the door when he saw movement in front of it. Through the small window he could vaguely see Kendall. Logan's brow furrowed and he tried to listen to what was going on outside. He could hear different voices and he recognized them immediately. One was Mr. Garcia and the other was Mrs. Diamond. If they were here Logan could assume Mr. Diamond and Mrs. Garcia were here as well. Logan looked back out the window noticing someone else come into view. It was Kendall's dad. All his friend's parents were here. They were here to support their children but they were probably also here for…" Tears immediately started to fall from Logan's eyes. They were here because his father died; they were probably here for his funeral.

"Papa…" Logan tired to remain quiet so he wouldn't alert everyone outside but once he started crying he couldn't stop the sobs from coming out.

…..

Kendall was still leaning against the wall looking down as everyone else talked around him. They were discussing what they should do when Logan woke up and frankly none of them had a clue. They continued talking until a noise forced them all to fall silent. They glanced at the door sadly as the small sobs began to increase and get louder.

"He's awake." Kendall wanted to roll his eyes at James for stating the obvious but he didn't have time for that now. Kendall quickly pulled open the door and walked into the room with James and Carlos following. Their parents went to follow as well but Kendall turned stopping them.

"I think you guys should wait out here for a little while." They all looked at Kendall confused but Mr. Knight seemed to figure out what Kendall meant quickly.

"Ok, we understand." Kendall nodded at his dad and walked into the room. The parents stood in the hall feeling helpless as the sobs increased in volume.

"What do we do now?" Mrs. Knight could feel the sting of tears. "I feel so helpless." Mrs. Diamond wrapped her arm around Mrs. Knight trying to comfort her.

"The only thing we can do is support those boys. We need to remind Logan that he still has a family." The other parents nodded at Mrs. Diamonds words. Mr. Garcia sighed heavily causing the others to look at him.

"That may comfort Logan but it's not going to convince child services when they come for him. Logan is an orphan now; they'll try and take him away."

"Over my dead body." The thought of anyone taking away Logan filled Mrs. Knight with rage. No one was taking away one of her babies. When she looked around she could see the same rage in Mrs. Garcia and Mrs. Diamonds eyes. All three mothers felt the need to protect him. He may not be related by blood but they had known Logan long enough to consider him one of their sons.

"Why don't we go to the cafeteria and talk about this. We should give the boys some privacy." Everyone agreed with Mr. Garcia and they walked off glancing back sadly when they heard something that brought them all to tears.

"I want my papa…" Kendall climbed into bed with Logan and pulled him close. It was hard to avoid hurting Logan but Kendall managed to do it. He showered Logan with kisses and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Shhh… it's ok." Kendall laid back allowing Logan to curl into his side. Logan clung onto Kendall's shirt as his tears continued to fall. After a while Logan's sobs quieted down but the tears continued to fall. Kendall couldn't believe someone could cry so much. It was an endless stream and Kendall wouldn't be surprised if he cried himself dry. Logan shifted so he was lying on his back. Lying on his side was really starting to hurt. Kendall was still running his hands through Logan's hair but he stopped and sat up quickly when his fingers brushed against Logan's forehead, it was really hot. "Logan?" Kendall placed his hand on Logan's forehead and cheeks feeling heat radiating off of him. "You're burning up!" James and Carlos sat up in alarm also reaching out to feel Logan's face. Logan was slightly panting and he was starting to sweat.

"It's so hot in here." Kendall jumped off the bed and pulled off Logan's blanket. He pressed the call button waiting impatiently for a nurse to come in. Kendall was surprised when Dr. Wells walked into the room.

"What's going on boys?"

"He's burning up!" Dr. Wells furrowed his eyebrows with worry and walked past James and Carlos to examine Logan. He put his hand to Logan's forehead his eyebrows furrowing even more. Dr. Wells walked over to the door and called a nurse into the room. When she walked in she took out a thermometer and stuck it in Logan's mouth. When it beeped she looked at the number then looked to Logan with worry.

"It reads 105.3" Dr. Wells cursed under his breath.

"Get an IV into him." The nurse nodded and walked out of the room. "Let's see what the problem is here." Dr. Wells placed his hand on Logan's shoulder then pressed down. Logan only whimpered slightly. He moved to his chest and pressed down and Logan flinched, whimpering a little more. Dr. Wells pressed the area around where Logan's cut was but still only got small whimpers. He moved to Logan's legs but still only got the same reaction. "What am I missing here?" Kendall, James, and Carlos watched with worry as Dr. Wells continued to examine Logan. He sighed and reluctantly moved over the center of Logan's chest and stomach. If it wasn't anything else it had to be the cut. Dr. Wells pulled up Logan's shirt revealing a long bandage. Kendall, James, and Carlos gasped. They didn't realize how long it really was. Dr. Wells placed his hand on the top of the bandage and moved his hand downward. Logan's whimpers turned into full on screams as he moved down. Dr. Wells stopped just below Logan's belly button were most of the pain seemed to be coming from. Logan fisted the sheets under him crying out as Dr. Wells pressed his hand down. Kendall started freaking out and went to push Dr. Wells hand away.

"STOP YOUR HURTING HIM!" Dr. Wells sighed but finally pulled his hand away.

"The wound wasn't that deep he shouldn't be affected like that." Kendall looked to James and Carlos who where sharing his expressions of worry. Dr. Wells softly pulled off Logan's bandage and examined the cut closely. The area was red and slightly swollen. "He has an infection." Dr. Wells looked up at Logan who had his head turned to the side as tears continued to fall. "Logan, how long have you been feeling this much pain. Logan swallowed hard and kept his eyes fixed on the wall.

"Since yesterday." Kendall's eyes furrowed.

"Yesterday? But you just got here yesterday." Kendall turned to Dr. Wells. "How can an infection spread that fast?"

"It was probably because of all his movement. He must have been ignoring the pain." Kendall glanced up at Logan.

"Why didn't you say anything?" Logan's lip started to quiver and his body began to shake.

"Because I didn't care."

"How could you not care?" James was standing in front of Logan but Logan still refused to look at anyone. Dr. Wells sighed and walked towards the door. The nurse was just coming back with the morphine and after Dr. Wells instructed her she brought in some antibiotics as well.

"The morphine will relieve the pain and the antibiotics with fight off the infection. Normally the morphine will put him to sleep but the antibiotics will keep him awake. After the nurse injected Logan's IV and replaced his bandage she and Dr. Wells left. Kendall pulled up at chair by Logan's face and sat down. Logan went to turn his head away but Kendall grabbed his chin forcing him to look at Kendall. Kendall stared into Logan's eyes and could see pain, misery and fear. More tears fell and Logan began to shake under Kendall's scrutiny.

"Answer the question Logan. How could you not care?" Logan flinched slightly at Kendall's tone. He could tell he was angry and Kendall wasn't even trying to hide it. Logan closed his eyes tightly his body shaking more.

"There's no point. I've lost everything." Kendall's face softened slightly and he cupped Logan's cheek. Logan opened his eyes looking at Kendall's face no longer seeing anger but love.

"Logan, you still have us. You still have Katie and my mom and Carlos and James' parents. You have so many people who love you. Please don't give up Logan. I love you so much. You're my everything." Logan let out a quiet sob as he began to cry harder. He looked back at Kendall with more fear in his eyes.

"You don't get it! I'm an orphan now! I'll be taken away and I'll never see you again!" Logan tore his face away from Kendall and began to cry loudly. "I'll be all alone!" Kendall lay down on Logan's bed again being sure to avoid his injuries. He lifted Logan slightly so Logan had his head rested on Kendall's chest. Logan strained to look up at Kendall but looked back down when he realized it wasn't going to work. "I'm so scared Kendall." Kendall kissed the top of Logan's head and stroked his hair.

"No one is going to take you away from me. Try and get some sleep." Even with the effect of the antibiotics Logan had managed to drift to sleep. Kendall could still feel heat radiating off of Logan filling him with worry. Kendall sighed and slowly got off the bed. As soon as he was off their parents walked back into the room. They all looked to the boys with worry noticing something had changed. Mrs. Knight walked to Logan's bed glancing at him.

"What's wrong?" Kendall sighed and ran his hands through Logan's hair softly.

"Logan has a bad fever and an infection." Mrs. Knight gasped and put her hand to Logan's face. Her eyes widened and she let out a gasp.

"He's so warm! What's his temperature?" When Mrs. Knight looked at Kendall she could see the fear in his eyes.

"105.3" Mrs. Garcia and Mrs. Diamond walked to the other side of the bed. Mrs. Garcia pulled a tissue from her purse and wiped the remnants of tears from Logan's face.

"He looks like he's in so much pain." Kendall looked at James' mom then back down at Logan. The morphine should have taken affect already.

"But they gave him pain killers." By now Mr. Garcia, Mr. Diamond and Mr. Knight had walked over to the bed (thank god it was a big room). They all were examining Logan and they all came to the same conclusion.

"It doesn't look like it." Mr. Garcia pressed the call button. When the nurse walked in she was met with 9 pairs of worried eyes.

"What can I do for you?"

"Logan was given pain medication but it doesn't appear to be taking affect." Mr. Garcia stated. The nurse walked over to Logan's side Kendall, his mom, James, and Carlos having to step out of the way for the nurse. She examined him for a moment noticing the pained look on his sleeping form. She excused herself for a moment and came back with the doctor. Dr. Wells did an examination then let out a sigh.

"It appears the antibiotics and the morphine had a different affect then I thought." Everyone looked at the doctor with worried expressions.

"What do you mean?" Mrs. Garcia held onto her son's hand noticing the fear in his voice.

"Normally the antibiotics stop the morphine's sleeping affect but as you can see, Logan's asleep. What I believe is happening is that the antibiotics are still fighting off the infection but they are counteracting with most of the morphine. It makes him sleepy but it doesn't stop any of the pain." Mr. Diamond turned to the doctor.

"What does that mean?" The Dr. sighed heavily.

"The antibiotics will work but the pain killer will not. We would be better off not giving him any because he won't be relieved from the pain. Until the infection is gone we can't do much for him. That also leaves us with a problem. The pain will probably keep him with a high temperature but hopefully it won't affect him too much. His fever is mostly from the infection. Once that starts to heal his temperature will drop to around 102." Everyone nodded at the doctor in understanding. Soon after he left the room Logan started to stir. He shifted slightly groaning slightly. When Logan opened his eyes he was slightly startled to see so many people in the room. After a second of looking around he took in a shuttering breath. His whole body was on fire. Logan shut his eyes tightly and let out a small whimper. Mrs. Knight stroked Logan's cheek and gave him a sympathetic smile.

"Logan sweetheart are you ok?" Logan shook his head and let out another whimper.

"Everything hurts." Mrs. Knight sighed heavily.

"I know but try and get some sleep." Logan nodded and shut his eyes. He really did try to go back to sleep but the pain was so excruciating. Didn't they give him pain medication? Logan tried to remain quiet so he wouldn't alert anyone. They must have believed he fell asleep because they started to talk about him in hushed whispers.

"Mom, dad. Is it true? Will Logan be taken away from us? Mr. and Mrs. Garcia turned to their son who was looking at them with fear in his eyes.

"Carlos, where did you hear that?" Mr. Garcia asked. Carlos looked to Logan's "sleeping" form and pointed to him.

"Logan started feeling pain from the infection yesterday but he didn't say anything. When we asked him why he said it was because he didn't care."

"What do you mean he didn't care?" Mr. Knight looked at his own son when Carlos didn't answer. "Kendall?"

"He said he had lost everything and we told him he still had us but then he said he would be taken away and we probably would never see him again." Kendall looked to both his parents with hope filled eyes. "Please tell me you're not going to let anyone take him." Mr. Knight glanced at everyone then smiled at Kendall.

"No one is taking Logan anywhere, I promise you that." Logan couldn't help but feel slightly relieved by Mr. Knight's words. He was so afraid that he would loss the only people left that were keeping him sane. His aching muscles relaxed slightly and some pain went away. He hadn't realized that the tension in his body was mostly from his fear. Logan knew that everyone would take care of him so Logan could grow up and make his father proud. The thought of Logan's father pulled on his heart strings. Logan opened his eyes and gripped onto Kendall's hand causing Kendall to look down at him. Logan didn't say anything but instead took in a breath and closed his eyes again. Holding Kendall's hand helped him remember that he was going to be ok. Kendall would take care of him. Kendall leaned down and kissed Logan's forehead. Before he pulled away he leaned over to his ear.

"I love you." Kendall smiled when Logan let out a happy sigh.

"I love you too." Kendall pulled away but kept his hand locked with Logan's. He rubbed Logan's skin offering a small comfort to him. Before Logan knew it he had drifted off to sleep. Kendall smiled at Logan then looked up to see everyone was smirking at him. He blushed slightly causing everyone to laugh quietly.

"What?" Mr. Knight patted Kendall on the back smiling at him but Kendall was more focused on glaring at James and Carlos who were flicking their wrists like they were holding a whip. He shook his head at his two laughing friends but everyone's attention went to the door when someone knocked softly. A tall slender woman walked in and looked at everyone. She was holding a clipboard and frowning. She defiantly didn't look like a nice person.

"Hello is this the room of Logan Mitchell." Everyone nodded looked to each other with furrowed eyebrows.

"How can we help you?" Mrs. Knight asked. The woman sighed and put on her glasses so she could read from her clipboard.

"My name is Mrs. Stanford and I'm a social worker. I'll need to speak to Logan about his situation." Kendall jaw clenched and he glared at the woman.

"There's nothing for you to talk about so why don't you just go." Mr. and Mrs. Knight gave Kendall a look before turning back to the social worker.

"I apologize for my son may we speak to you in the hall?" The woman nodded and walked outside with James, Carlos and Kendall's parents. The three boys looked at each other before scrambling to the door to listen.

"We're not just going to sit back and let you take him. He belongs with us!" Kendall, James and Carlos could tell Mrs. Knight was trying to remain calm but she was slowly losing her patients.

"I'm sorry but I can't leave him with just anyone. I have to look out for the best interest of the child."

"You think leaving him with strangers rather than letting him stay with his family is in his best interest!" Carlos wasn't surprised that his mother was the first one to start yelling. She was a happy woman but she could get upset quickly.

"If I'm not mistaken Mrs. Garcia Logan Mitchell is not a part of any of your families." Now it was Mr. Knight's turn to get angry.

"Bullshit! How dare you come here and tell us who our family is and isn't. Logan is a part of all of our families even if he isn't related by blood. So let me tell you something if you think you can come here and take him without a fight then you have another thing coming." James and Carlos were a little frightened by Mr. Knight's tone. Now they know where Kendall gets his anger management issues from. "Logan is staying with us." The three boys heard the woman sigh heavily.

"I have no problem getting the police involved in this if I have to."

"Go ahead, I have a feeling they'll be on our side not yours."

"Mr. Garcia…"

"That's _**Officer**_ Garcia to you." Carlos smirked. He wished he could have seen her face when his father said that.

"Enough of this, I need to speak to Logan."

"He's asleep and even if he wasn't you're not going anywhere near that boy. He's scared enough!" James frowned. He could tell this was upsetting his mother; she always was one to cry easily.

"I'm sorry but you're just going to have to wake him up." Without any warning the door was yanked open causing the three boys to tumble to the floor. They scrambled up quickly and smiled at their parents sheepishly. Their parents shook their heads at them and walked into the room. They all stood on the sides of Logan's bed while Mrs. Stanford stood at the end. Kendall sighed heavily and cupped Logan's cheek.

"Logan, wake up." Logan groaned in annoyance and frustration. Sleep had been keeping the pain away. When he opened his eyes he was met by fear filled eyes.

"Kendall?" before Kendall could say anything another voice caught Logan's attention.

"Logan Mitchell?" Logan looked toward the end of the bed to see a woman standing there. He stared at her confused for a moment before finally speaking.

"Yes?"

"My name is Mrs. Stanford and I'm a social worker." Logan's eyes widened and he started to shake. Kendall grasped Logan's hand and rubbed his skin with his thumb. "Because of your recent situation you'll need to be relocated. Normal you would be put in foster care but there is a nice family in New York who is look for a child around your age…" Logan shoot up in bed ignore the pain the shot through him.

"W-what? No… NO! I want to stay here!" James, Carlos, and Kendall's parents were giving the woman an "I told you so" look. She sighed heavily and looked at Logan.

"Logan because of your age you do not have a…"

"YES I DO IT"S MY LIFE!" Logan lay back in bed suddenly feeling dizzy. Mrs. Stanford didn't seem to notice.

"Your father didn't specify what he wanted for you if he should die leaving us in charge of what happens to you."

"WILL YOU SHUT UP?" Mrs. Stanford was shocked by Kendall's sudden outburst. Kendall leaned over Logan eyeing him worriedly. Logan had his arm over his eyes and he was whimpering slightly. "Logan! Are you ok?" Logan moved his arm to look at Kendall. Kendall gasped when he noticed that Logan's skin had paled. Logan coughed and covered his mouth with his hand. He pointed frantically at a small garbage can in the corner of the room. Carlos ran over and picked it up handing it to Kendall. Kendall, with the help of James, lifted Logan into a sitting position and placed the garbage on the bed between his legs. Logan held onto the garbage can and started to violently throw up into it. Mrs. Knight pressed the call bottom and Dr. Wells came in. Kendall rubbed Logan's back as he finished. He moved the garbage away and helped Logan lay back down. Logan was now sobbing from the pain throwing up had caused him. His stomach was doing flips and his whole upper body was on fire. Mrs. Garcia pulled out another tissue and wiped Logan's face. Dr. Wells took a cold patch from a closet and placed it on Logan's neck. Dr. Wells put more cold patches on the table by Logan's bed and turned to everyone.

"He's ok. Just use these to try and keep him more comfortable. Nausea is a side effect of the antibiotics but it should only occur when he is upset so keep him calm. Everyone in the room turned and glare at the woman who seemed to be standing unfazed. This was her fault. Kendall was silently whispering to Logan who was still whimpering and crying.

"Logan try and go to sleep." Logan whimpered again.

"I can't… everything hurts too much." Kendall turned to Dr. Wells with pleading eyes.

"Isn't there something you can do?" Dr. Wells sighed heavily.

"In order for the pain killers to take affect we would have to take him off the antibiotics but without those the infection won't heal. The good thing is though that it seems they are already taken affect, his temperature is down to 103.6" Dr. Wells was glancing at a monitor as he spoke. He went to leave but before he was out the door he turned and spoke. "Please try and keep him relaxed. He will be less likely to get sick." When Dr. Wells left Kendall growled at Mrs. Stanford.

"You son of a-" Mr. Knight quickly covered Kendall's mouth ignoring his fuming protests. Mr. Knight turned to the social worker and glared at her.

"Leave… now."

There is more I need to…"

"He is in no condition to talk to you." Mr. Garcia cut in."

"I need to talk to Logan. There isn't much time before he will be released and it's not like his father had a will or anything." Everyone continued to glare at her but then Mr. Knight dropped his glare allowing his eyes to widen with realization.

"He does." Everyone turned to Mr. Knight.

"He does what dad?"

"Rick… he has a will."

**A/N: And that is the end of this chapter! I felt like this was difficult to write because the focus was going away from Kendall and Logan. Well that's what happens when you add so many dam characters *sigh*. Anyway, I am starting to feel this story coming to a close and I've already told myself that I don't want to go farther than 40 chapters so enjoy this while it lasts cause it's almost over. Anyway!**

**There is more to come!**


	34. crabby loopy and sad

It had taken a week to get Mr. Mitchell's will. James, Carlos, and Kendall's parents ran around frantically making calls and doing everything they possibly could for Logan. Mr. Knight contacted the man who wrote Mr. Mitchell's will and he was coming out to California with it and everyone else were making preparations for Logan's father's funeral. They didn't bother to involve Logan with what was going on because he wasn't in any condition to. By now his infection had healed but he still had three more days until he could be put on pain kills. He wasn't screaming and crying from the pain but it was enough to leave him uncomfortable and irritated. He didn't sleep much because he couldn't get to sleep and he didn't eat much because he was too uncomfortable to eat. At first he tried to ignore everything but after a while he started to lash out at people (mostly Kendall) but Kendall didn't get angry because he understood why Logan was always in a bad mood. James had joked that Logan was like a woman in labor lashing out at her husband. Unfortunately for James he decided to say this around Logan which allowed him to suffer a pillow to the face. Normally James would have retaliated because Logan could have damaged "the face" but this time he let it slide.

Logan rolled onto his side and let out an annoyed whine. He was so tired but he couldn't get himself to fall asleep. Logan was hot, sweaty, really sore and starving. Because Logan was too sore to sleep he was too tired to eat, which also kept him from falling asleep. Logan let out another whine of frustration and rolled onto his back. James and Carlos had left to get food leaving Kendall as the only person in the room. Kendall was in the corner asleep with his head against the wall. Logan narrowed his eyes at Kendall, he felt like he was mocking him.

"Kendall…" Logan whined. Kendall stirred slightly but didn't wake. Logan sighed with frustration and finally chucked his pillow at Kendall. Kendall woke with a start when something hit him in the chest. He looked over to Logan's bed blinking a couple times when he realized Logan was slightly glaring at him. Kendall walked over to Logan and sat down on the bed. He placed his hand on Logan's head and started massaging his scalp.

"What's wrong Logie?" Logan closed his eyes enjoying Kendall's touches.

"I can't sleep. I'm so tired but I can't get myself to fall asleep because I'm so sore and hungry." Kendall continued to rub Logan's scalp noticing his eyes were beginning to droop.

"James and Carlos are going to bring you food when they get back so why don't you try and sleep until then." Logan looked up at Kendall trying his best to glare.

"I'm trying but I can't fall asleep!" Kendall sighed moving his hand to cup Logan's face.

"Ok, ok calm down. Just close your eyes and relax." Logan sighed and closed his eyes. He readjusted himself so he was half on his side and half on his back. Kendall moved his hand to Logan's side and started moving his fingers up and down softly.

"Logie, you know I love you right?" Logan sighed relaxing more.

"Yes." Kendall smiled down at Logan.

"You know I'd do anything for you right?"

"Mmhhmm." With each passing moment Logan became more and more relaxed. Kendall continuing to ask Logan questions until his answers were no long sentences but soft moans.

"Are you asleep Logie." When Logan didn't answer Kendall sighed happily. He stayed in his spot rubbing Logan's side soothingly just in case it was the only thing keeping him asleep. Logan had been asleep for no more then 10 minutes when Carlos and James came in. They didn't bother to be quiet as they swung open the door it hitting the wall with a loud obnoxious thud. Kendall stood up quickly cringing at the noise and glaring at his two idiot friends.

"Dam it I just got him to sleep!" Kendall hissed out. James and Carlos looked at each other than to Kendall with guilty expressions.

"Kendall we didn't mean…" Before they could finish Logan shifted and let out a high pitched whine. He laid on his back and covered his eyes with his hands.

"What the hell! I was finally asleep!" Logan felt like a baby but he couldn't help it. He hadn't slept in days and he was sick and tired of everything. He was so tired and so angry he couldn't stop tears from rolling down his cheeks. Kendall glared at his friends who were looking down feeling extremely guilty. Kendall moved back to Logan's side and softly grabbed his wrists. Logan let out a whine of protest as Kendall lifted his hands from his eyes.

"Shh, shh, shh. Go back to sleep." It took Kendall at least 30 minutes but he was eventually able to get Logan to fall back asleep. Kendall sighed with relief. When he heard the door open again he was ready to bite off the head of whoever it was if they made any noise. Mrs. Knight crept into the room quietly looking around. When she noticed Logan sleeping form she smiled slightly and motioned for Kendall, James, and Carlos to come outside. Kendall nodded wiping the tears off of Logan's face before quietly getting up and moving out of the room.

"You finally got him to sleep?" Mrs. Knight whispered afraid she might wake Logan up even though they were no longer in the room. Kendall nodded but glared at James and Carlos.

"Yea, no thanks to them."

"We're really sorry Kendall. I didn't think he would be asleep considering he hasn't been able to sleep in days."

"Shouldn't that mean you should be quieter so he could at least try to sleep?" James went to say something else but just nodded his head. Both James and Carlos hung their heads.

"We're sorry." Kendall sighed and patted them both on the shoulder.

"It's fine. He's asleep now." Kendall furrowed his brow noticing something. "I thought you guys were going to get him some food?" They both side heavily.

"We were but everything they had we figured Logan wouldn't like. It's bad enough he's a picky eater on his own but he is probably even worse now." Kendall nodded in understanding. After years of knowing Logan they quickly figured out he was strange when it came to food. He loved French fries but hated potatoes, loved pizza but would always remove the cheese (how could you eat pizza without cheese? Without it it's just bread with sauce), and finally Logan wasn't the type to try new foods. If he never heard of it he wasn't going to eat it, especially if it didn't look appetizing. (1)

"Why don't I go get him something?" Mrs. Knight interjected. Kendall, Carlos, and James all nodded. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you boys that we were able to get Mr. Mitchell's will. I was going to tell Logan now but its better that we wait until he wakes up and gets some food into him." The three boys nodded again before saying quick goodbyes to Mrs. Knight.

* * *

Have you ever felt so hungry you thought you would puke? Well that's how Logan felt when he first opened his eyes. He wasn't sure what time it was and when he looked around no one was in the room. He wasn't tired anymore so he must have been out for a long time. Logan put his hand on his stomach frowning as it grumbled.

"I'm so hungry." Logan whined. Logan looked around the room for anything he could snack on. The only thing he could see was a pitcher of water. Logan sighed and sat up slowly. He poured himself a glass and chugged it. Logan cringed; he didn't realize how cold the water was.

"Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow!" Kendall, James, Carlos, and their parents burst into the room wide eyed.

"LOGAN!" Kendall ran to his side eyeing Logan with worry. "Are you ok? What hurts?" Logan was pinching the bridge of his nose and waving at Kendall trying to calm him. When his head stopped hurting he let out a sigh. "Logan! What is it?" Logan looked at Kendall with a sheepish smile.

"Brain freeze." Kendall raised an eyebrow as everyone else in the room sighed with relief. Mrs. Knight chuckled softly and walked over to Logan handing him a bag.

"Do you think you feel good enough to eat?"

"YES!" Logan cleared his throat. "I-I mean sure… I can eat." Logan blushed as everyone laughed quietly. He took the bag from Mrs. Knight and pulled out a tray full of spaghetti and meatballs. Logan started eating immediately but taking his time so he could enjoy the food. Once he was done Mrs. Knight took the garbage away and threw it out. Logan sat back and let out a content sigh. He was full and awake. He still felt some pain but he was more comfortable then he was before.

"Logan." Logan turned to Mr. Knight who was standing at the end of the bed. "We got your father's will." Logan nodded slowly waiting for him to continue. Mr. Knight pulled out an envelope and handed it to Logan. "We haven't read it yet. We got it two days ago but we wanted to wait for you to wake up." Logan's eyes widened.

"Two days? I was asleep for two days." Everyone nodded.

"It was more like a day and a half but you were knocked out. I'm not surprised you haven't had a good night's sleep in a week." Logan nodded at Kendall then turned back to the envelope. He swallowed and opened it. It was a thick packet that mostly asked Logan's dad questions about himself. Logan scanned through the not so important stuff quickly. When he reached the last few pages it started talking about him. "So what does it say?" Logan waved at Kendall to get him to be quiet. He continued reading until he got to one section that made a smile tug at the corner of his mouth. Logan felt the sting of tears as he read what was on the page. Kendall reached up and wiped a tear from Logan's face. "Logan? What does it say?" Logan cleared his throat.

"It says… uh… in case of my untimely death Logan is to be put in the custody of his extended families… Garcia, Diamond, and Knight." Logan looked up at Kendall smiling. "It looks like I'm not going anywhere." Everyone cheered hugging each other. Kendall hugged Logan tightly. When he pulled away he looked into Logan's eyes before grabbing Logan's face and pulling him into a passionate kiss. Logan gasped at the unexpected contacted but soon melted into Kendall's touch. He couldn't remember the last time he kissed Kendall like this and it felt so good. Before the kiss could get heated Kendall pulled away. Logan was stunned for a moment but he blushed deeply when he remembered who was in the room.

"What else does it say Logan." James couldn't help by laugh at Logan who was still trying to recover from Kendall's sudden kiss.

"Uhhh…. Let me see." Logan continued to read the will silently. There wasn't much left on it that he really needed to know. It mostly said that his father wanted his stuff donated to charity, he wanted to their house to be sold and the profit donated to charity," Logan picked up the glass of water and started to drink from it, "He created a bank account for Logan with the amount of $300,000!" Logan eyes widened and he spit his drink out all over himself and the bed. Luckily for him the will didn't get wet. Kendall rubbed Logan's back as Logan coughed harshly.

"What did it say?" Carlos asked. Everyone was watching Logan with concern. Logan gathered himself and re-read the sentence over and over again. Logan handed the paper to Kendall and pointed to the sentence with wide eyes. He couldn't get the words out. Kendall looked at Logan with furrowed eye brows before looking at the paper and reading out loud.

"I leave in a bank account with the amount of HOLLY SHIT!"

"Kendall language!" Mrs. Knight scolded. Kendall waved at his mother dismissing her."

"IT SAYS 300,000 DOLLARS!" Mrs. Knight's eyes widened.

"Holly shit." Kendall threw his hand up at his mom.

"Oh I can't curse but you can." Mrs. Knight waved away her sons protest and took the paper from him.

"He's right. That's what it says." Mrs. Knight looked to Logan with furrowed eye brows. "But where did he get that kind of money?" Logan thought for a moment. He always did have nicer things then his friends but it never seemed like his family was loaded.

"Maybe it was my grandpa's neighbor." Everyone looked at Logan confused. "When my dad was growing up he used to work for this old guy he lived next to. He would do all types of house work for him for free and when he passed away he left my dad some money. _'It was nothing to sneeze at.'_ He said that when he told me the story. I never really got what he meant." James laughed quietly.

"When he said it was nothing to sneeze at he wasn't kidding." Everyone nodded. "So what are you going to do with all that cash?" Logan shrugged.

"Save it I guess. I won't have to worry about paying for college and if anything ever happens I could always use it." Mrs. Knight took the paper back from Logan and started heading for the door.

"Well I better get this to the social worker. Why don't you get some rest Logan, you'll be doing you're deep cleaning procedure tomorrow morning." Logan nodded and laid back in bed. He didn't think there was any possibility of him going to sleep after spending nearly two days sleeping but even with that Logan drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Kendall, James, and Carlos were waiting in the waiting room for Logan to be done with his procedure. The infection was gone but the doctors wanted to make sure it was completely clean before they released Logan from the hospital. If everything went smoothly Logan would leave the hospital as soon as tomorrow. Kendall, James, and Carlos looked up when Dr. Wells walked into the waiting room. He was smiling which allowed the three boys to relax.

"Ok boys Logan is back in his room. Before Kendall, James, and Carlos could walk past him he put a hand out to stop them.

"What is it?" Kendall asked concerned.

"Don't worry he is completely fine. I just want to warn you that we had to give him something while we were cleaning the wound. We didn't want him to feel too much pain. When you go in there he is still going to be… a little loopy." Dr. Wells was trying to hide it but the boys could tell he was smirking about something. They walked past him and down the hall to Logan's room. They walked in slowly to find Logan sitting up in his bed. Kendall, James, and Carlos looked at each other weirdly as they watched Logan. He was staring at his hand with his head tilted. His brow was furrowed in confusion and his tongue was sticking out of his mouth slightly. Kendall walked to Logan's side while James and Carlos walked to the other side of Logan.

"Logan?" Logan looked up at Kendall and smiled.

"Hey Ken doll!" Logan giggled and went back to looking at his hands. James and Carlos were smiling but were still giving Logan weird looks.

"Logan, what are you doing?" Logan plopped his hands done and started giggling at Kendall.

"I have fingers." Logan started giggling again then spotted something. He grabbed Kendall's hand and was looking at it closely. "Wooh! You have fingers too!" James and Carlos covered their mouths but chuckles and snorts could still be heard.

"L-Logan are you ok?" Kendall was trying to keep his voice steady but he could feel the laughter coming on. Logan threw his hands up and laid down on the bed. He cheered and plopped his arms down again.

"I feel… so awesome right now." Logan giggled but suddenly stopped when he looked up at the ceiling. He pointed towards the ceiling tilting his head in confusion. "Why is there a flower on the ceiling? (2)." James, Carlos, and Kendall all looked up then looked back at Logan laughing.

"Logan there isn't a flower up there." Logan turned to James with a pout. He waved his hands around pointing at the ceiling.

"But it's right thererrrrrrrrr!" Logan whined.

"Ok Logan I think you need to get some rest." Kendall tried to get Logan to lie down but he whined and spastically slapped Kendall's hands away.

"NUUHHH!" Logan started laughing uncontrollable making James, Carlos and Kendall laugh. He suddenly stopped and stared at them. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing don't worry about it?" Kendall laughed out. Logan stared at Kendall blankly then nodded his head. He started giggling again then grabbed Kendall's shirt. Kendall leaned down completely amused by this. Logan put his hand on the top of Kendall's head and patted his head a couple of times.

"You're pretty." Kendall let out a snort, this was too funny. Logan moved his hands to Kendall's face and poked Kendall's eyebrows. "Hey Ken doll, can I give you a nickname."

"Sure, what is it Logan?" Logan sat back and started giggling.

"I'M! Going to call you… BUSHY BROW!" Logan threw up his arms giggling again." James and Carlos started busting out laughing at Kendall who was pouting. Logan tilted his head and copied Kendall's face. "What's wrong Ken doll you don't like that nickname?"

"Not particularly." Logan waved his hands at Kendall then turned to Carlos and James.

"It's ok! It's Ok! I'll give them nicknames too!" James and Carlos immediately stopped laughing to stare at Logan. Logan pointed to Carlos almost hitting him in the face. "I'M! Going to call you… smurfy." Carlos blinked a couple of times.

"Why?" Logan giggled.

"Cause smurfs are tiny!" Carlos glared at Logan as he continued to giggle.

"I'm NOT TINY!" James and Kendall snickered causing Carlos to pout. Logan pointed to James not hitting him because he was farther away.

"I'M! Going to call you…" Logan dropped his hand and giggled. He pulled on Kendall's arm until he bent down. Logan whispered something in Kendall's ear making Kendall's eyes widen. Kendall started laughing hysterically as Logan giggled. Carlos and James looked at each other then looked back to Kendall.

"What did he say?" Kendall composed himself then stood up. He turned to Logan and pointed to James.

"Go on, tell him." Logan nodded vigorously then turned to James.

"You're going to be… Fairy princess!" James' jaw dropped.

"What the… What the hell is that supposed to mean!" Logan didn't answer. He started swinging his arms around singing the theme for my little pony.

"My little pony! My little pony! NUH NUH NUH NUH NUH NUH NUH!" Logan plopped his arms down and stared at Kendall. "I'm tired!"

"Then go to sleep."

"I'm tired."

"Then go. To. Sleep." Logan nodded and laid back in bed. He was out like a light within seconds. James and Carlos were pouting as Kendall chuckled at them.

"He is so lucky he is loopy. If he said that sober I would kill him." James spat. Kendall chuckled and leaned down kissing Logan's forehead.

"Calm down fairy princess."

* * *

Logan woke up surprised that he wasn't in any pain. He sighed with relief; he was finally on pain medication.

"Logan, you're awake." Logan sat up and smiled when he noticed Kendall sitting on the other side of the room. Kendall stood up and walked over to Logan kissing his cheek. "Guess what." Logan looked up at Kendall smiling.

"What?"

"You get to leave today." Kendall said in a sing song fashion. Logan smiled brightly but frowned when he noticed James and Carlos who were standing off to the side somewhat glaring at him. Logan pointed in their direction.

"What's with them?" Kendall looked back and rolled his eyes.

"Come on guys he doesn't even remember." Logan looked up at Kendall confused.

"Remember what." Kendall turned back to Logan with a smirk on his face.

"You were loopy from the pain killers they gave you to knock you out and you were… acting a little… strange." Logan's eyes widened and he blushed.

"Oh god what did I do."

"You called Carlos a smurf and James a fairy princess." Logan tried to hide the smirk but he barely did.

"Really?" Kendall nodded smirking as well.

"You also were fascinated by the fact that you had fingers and you asked us why there was a flower on the ceiling." Logan blushed again. He must have looked so ridiculous. Kendall kissed Logan's forehead lovingly. "Don't worry, you were adorable. James and Carlos scoffed making Logan smile at them sheepishly.

"You know I would never call you guys that for real. Please don't be mad at me." James and Carlos both sighed and smiled.

"Don't worry about it Logan." Carlos said. Kendall grabbed a bag from the floor and put it on the bed.

"Here, get dressed. As soon as you're done. We're leaving." Logan smiled and hopped off the bed. He threw on the clothes and before they knew it they were leaving the hospital. When they reached the Palm Woods everyone in the lobby was greeting them. Logan blushed from all the attention feeling like he has been the center of it lately. When they reached the apartment Kendall, James, and Carlos' parents were sitting in the living room talking. Mrs. Knight was the first to stand up and walk over to the boys.

"Your back!" She gave Logan a soft hug and ruffled his hair. "It's good to see you out of the hospital." Logan nodded in agreement. "Can you boys come over here for a moment?" The four boys looked at each other then walked over to the living room. Mrs. Knight sat back down sighing softly. "Logan, you remember what your dad wanted to do with his stuff after his death right?" Logan nodded interlocking his fingers with Kendall's. "Well all his stuff is in his apartment here in LA and we were going to go through it. You don't have to come… but I just wanted to tell you." Logan nodded and let out a sigh.

"No, no… I'll go." Everyone stared at Logan.

"Logan… are you sure." Logan squeezed Kendall's hand and looked up at him.

"Yea… I'll be… fine." Kendall wasn't convinced but he nodded. "Do you guys want to go to the pool?" Carlos, James and Kendall nodded running off to their rooms. Before Logan could leave Mrs. Knight stopped him.

"Logan you shouldn't be down there you should rest."

"I'll stay in a lounge chair and won't move at all. Please Mrs. Knight." Mrs. Knight sighed and looked to the other parents.

"Ok, but be careful." Logan smiled and walked towards his room. Kendall was just finishing getting ready when Logan walked in.

"I'll wait by the door." Logan nodded watching Kendall walk out of the room. Logan sighed and grabbed some shorts and a t-shirt. He dressed slowly noticing his vision begin to blur. When Logan was finished dressing he wiped his eyes quickly waiting a minute or so before he left the room. Once he felt he was composed he grabbed a book and headed out the door. Would he really be ready for tomorrow?

No.

**A/N: and that is the end of this chapter. Nothing really interesting happens other then Logan getting out of the hospital YEY! And loopy Logan was funny. I literally thought of that during class and it was really hard to not lol. I almost did… that would have been weird. Anyway! I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**There is more to come! =]**

**(1): Everything I said there is how I am with food. Yea… I take the cheese off my pizza. DON'T JUDGE ME! People make fun of me for that all the time and what was written in quotes is what they actually say. "It's just bread with sauce!" I'm starting to not like eating pizza around other people… but I love pizza to much so I still do =]**

**(2): some of loopy Logan is based on a true story. A couple years ago I broke my leg and they gave me something to put me to sleep for a while so they could set my leg. I don't remember saying it but my mom said I asked her why there was a flower on the ceiling. lol**


	35. jacket

Logan stared out the window as they drove the short drive to his father's apartment. He was in Mrs. Knight's van with James, Carlos, Kendall, and Mr. Knight. Mr. and Mrs. Garcia were driving a moving truck while Mr. and Mrs. Diamond drove their own car. When they reached the apartments Logan jumped out not really paying attention to anyone. Kendall watched him sadly as Logan walked inside not waiting for anyone else. Logan was walking past the front desk when the man behind the desk looked up and called out to him.

"Hey kid." Logan looked up and looked around making sure the man was talking to him.

"Yes?"

"Your Mitchell's son right?" Logan flinched slightly.

"Yea…" The man sighed and walked around the counter. He was reaching into his pocket while he continued to talk to Logan.

"Your dad was a nice guy. I'm sorry about what happened to him. He wasn't here that long but you can say we were starting to become friends. He talked about you a lot, said you were smart and liked books." The man pulled out a small plastic object; it looked like a credit card. "My wife owns a bookstore that's down the block. You can get free books for a year with this." The man sighed again and placed a hand on Logan's shoulder. "I know it won't help but I figured in a time like this it would be nice to get something you like." Logan kept his eyes on the card examining it.

"Thank you." He nodded and smiled.

"No problem, you're a good kid." Kendall walked in just as Logan was finishing talking to the man. When Logan started walking towards the elevator again Kendall jogged so he could catch up with him.

"Logan?" Logan looked up at Kendall as he walked into the elevator. Kendall walked in as well staring at Logan as the doors closed. "What was that all about?" Logan held up the card smiling slightly.

"Free books for a year. That guy's wife owns a book store… he thought it was the least he could do." Kendall put his hand on Logan's head then moved down cupping his cheek. When the elevator opened they stepped out and walked towards Mr. Mitchell's apartment. Logan opened the door and walked in. He shivered slightly when he noticed there was still blood on the floor. Kendall walked out of the apartment and came back a second later with a wet floor sign. He placed it over the area so they didn't have to see it anymore. While Logan was looking around everyone had made their way up to the apartment. They looked around quickly before wordlessly starting to go to work. Mrs. Diamond, Garcia, and Knight started in the kitchen putting things in boxes, Mr. Knight, Garcia and Diamond started moving furniture, and Kendall, James and Carlos started putting things in boxes as well. Logan slowly walked down the hall and into his father's bed room. He ran his fingers over the holes in the door where Ryan had stuck the knife. He shivered slightly just thinking about it. It was strange knowing that Ryan was dead. Ryan was never going to hurt Logan again. But then Logan remembered, Ryan had a family too. Even though he was a bad guy they were grieving too… just like he was. Logan took put the boxes he had brought in the room with him and put them on the bed. He started putting things in the boxes trying not to pay attention to watch the objects were so it would hurt less. It barely worked though, Logan could feel the sting of tears as he put pictures, awards, and other things in the box. He smiled when he picked up one particular picture. It was an old drawing that Logan had done when he was five or so. It had a question at the top that read, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" At the bottom was a crayon drawing of Mr. Mitchell and Logan and it said under it, "I want to be a doctor just like my papa." Logan ran his fingers over the drawing and finally stuffed it in the box. When everything was taken off the shelves and night stand Logan moved to the dressers. He took out all the clothes and once that was done he moved to the closet. It was mostly filled with suits and when Logan took them all out there was one thing left hanging in the back. It was a plastic clothes bag. Logan pulled it out and set it on the bed. He pulled down the zipper and pulled out what was in it. It was an old plaid jacket that looked like it had gone out of style years ago.

"I remember this." Logan smiled. The jacket was in perfect condition because his father had kept it that way. It was the first gift Logan had ever given his dad. And his dad took care of it like it was the Holy Grail. He only wore it on special occasions, which was funny because it wasn't a fancy jacket. But because it meant so much to him he only wore it when the time called for it (father's day and birthdays). Logan could still remember the day he gave his dad this jacket.

(Flashback)

When Logan woke up he smiled brightly. He climbed out of bed and ran out his door. He ran down the hall to his parent's bedroom and pulled open the door. He had to stretch slightly so he could reach the doorknob. When he ran in he ran to his father's side of the bed and tried to jump on. When he failed several times Logan huffed and pouted. It was a high bed. Logan noticed his dad's arm was hanging off the side of the bed so he ran over and started pulling on his dad's arm.

"Papa, Papa! Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!" Logan was jumping up and down as he tugged on the sleeve of his father's shirt. Mr. Mitchell groaned and opened his eyes. He smiled when saw a bouncing and laughing Logan. Mr. Mitchell sat up and patted on the bed signaling for Logan to get on. Logan huffed and tried to get up again but failed. He looked at his father and held his hands up wanting his dad to help him. "Papa up! Up!" Mr. Mitchell grabbed Logan from under his arms and lifted him onto the bed. When he put Logan down he started tickling Logan. Logan giggled and rolled around spastically. Mr. Mitchell stopped and sat back. Logan crawled over to his dad's side and snuggled in. "Happy birthday papa!"

"Thank you Logan." Mr. Mitchell smiled down at his son and ruffled his hair. Logan smiled then looked over to the other side of the bed. He furrowed his eyebrows then looked back up at his dad.

"Papa? Where's mama?" Mr. Mitchell glanced to the empty side of the bed and let out a sad sigh.

"She's… with grandma." Logan nodded smiling when he remembered something. He jumped up and started bouncing on the bed.

"Can I give you your present now papa?" Mr. Mitchell laughed then grabbed onto Logan so he wouldn't fall over and hurt himself.

"Sure." Logan hopped off the bed and ran back to his room. When he came back he was holding a big box over his head. He was swaying back and forth as he walked because the box was a little too heavy for him. Mr. Mitchell furrowed his eyebrows smiling at Logan. He took the box from Logan and set it aside so he could help Logan back onto the bed. Logan sat bouncing as he watched his dad open the box. Mr. Mitchell pulled out the jacket and stared at it wide eyed.

"Wow Logan thank you!" Logan giggled as Mr. Mitchell ruffled his hair. Mr. Mitchell placed the jacket back down suddenly confused. "When did you get this?"

"When I went to the mall with Kendall and his mama."

"Did Kendall's mama pay for this?" Logan shook his head still smiling.

"Nope! I got it all by myself!"

"How could you pay for this?"

"I used my allowance." Mr. Mitchell raised an eyebrow at Logan.

"Logan… your allowance is a quarter a day." Logan pouted.

"I've been saving it since I was three. That's 365 quarters a year and in three years that's 1095 quarters which is $273.75." Mr. Mitchell smiled at Logan and gave him a high five.

"Nice job! Before you know it you're going to be better at math then me! But did this really cost that much." Logan shook his head.

"It was $55 so I have $220.75 left." Mr. Mitchell smiled and gave Logan another high five.

"Well thank you very much Logan I love it." Mr. Mitchell got out of bed and walked into the bathroom to quickly change, the last thing he threw on was the jacket. When he walked back out Logan was still on his bed. "How about we go down stairs and have a special breakfast. Does chocolate chip and banana pancakes sound good?" Logan nodded jumping off his bed.

"But can I make them papa. It is your birthday; you should let me do it." Mr. Mitchell lifted Logan up laughing.

"How about you help." Logan nodded vigorously. They were at the top of the stairs when they heard the front door bang open and the sounds of someone stumbling around breaking things. Logan gripped onto his father.

"Papa is there a monster down stairs?" Mr. Mitchell put Logan down on the floor and knelt down to his level.

"No Logan there isn't a monster down stairs. It's… only Mama." Mr. Mitchell stopped Logan before he could start to go down stairs to see his mom. Why don't you go to your room for a little while? I'll come back up and get you after I talk to mama." Logan nodded and walked over to his room. He glanced over his shoulder before walking in and closing the door. As soon as he heard his father go down the stairs Logan ran back out and sat at the top of the stairs listening. He heard more banging until his mother spoke loudly.

"Ricky! I missed you baby!" Logan heard his mother giggle slight.

"You're drunk again!" Logan slightly flinched at the anger in his father's voice. "You can't keep coming home drunk! And you stayed out all night! In case you forgot you have a son to think about!"

"Oh shut up Rick. The little punk doesn't need me. He can take care of himself."

"He's five years old! Do you know how hard it is to look him in the face whenever he asks where you are?" Logan heard more banging and things falling over. "Will you stop that! Just sit down!" Logan flinched when he heard his mother scream.

"GET OFF MY BACK YOU BASTARD!" Logan stood up quickly and ran into his room. He sat by his bed and covered his ears but he could still hear the screaming.

"I'M TIRED OF YOU COMING HOME DRUNK! I DON"T EVEN REMEMBER THE LAST TIME YOU WERE SOBER!"

"OH FUCK OFF!" Logan started shaking and crying as his parents continued to scream at each other. "I CAN DO WHAT EVER THE HELL I WANT!"

"NOT WHEN YOU HAVE A HUSBAND AND SON WHO HAVE TO ALWAYS WONDER WHERE YOU ARE!"

"THAT"S IT! I'M OUT OF HERE!"

"FINE! GO BACK OUT AND GET DRUNK AGAIN! AND WHILE YOUR AT IT WHY DON"T YOU CHEAT ON ME AGAIN TOO! THAT WOULD BE A WONDERFUL PRESENT FOR MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY!" Logan heard the front door slam but he didn't move. He stayed sitting on the ground covering his ears while he sobbed. Logan heard someone coming up the stairs and open his door. Mr. Mitchell frowned and moved over to his son quickly. He picked Logan up and began to rub his back as Logan wrapped his arms around his father's neck. "Shh… it's ok. I'm sorry I scared you Logan. Logan pulled back sniffing.

"Why were you and mama fighting? Don't you love mama?" Mr. Mitchell sighed and pulled Logan into a hug again.

"Of course I love mama… she just… is a little sick right now." Logan pulled back again.

"Is she gunna be ok? I don't want mama to go away like grandpa!" Logan's grandfather had passed away the previous year after being sick. It was the first time Logan experienced what it was like to lose someone. Mr. Mitchell shook his head and put Logan back down on the ground.

"No mama's not going away like grandpa but she might have to stay somewhere else for a while. Me and grandma are going to take her to a special hospital soon so she can get all better." Logan sniffed again.

"Really?" Mr. Mitchell nodded.

"How about we call Kendall, James, and Carlos and see if they and their papas want to hang out today. We can go to the park and get lunch and ice cream. And then we are going to go to Kendall's for a party." Logan smiled and nodded. Mr. Mitchell wiped Logan's tears away and picked him up leaving the room.

(End flashback)

Logan held the jacket to his chest and squeezed it. His dad never went a single birthday or father's day without this jacket. He had actually been teased because of it. Logan's dad didn't know Logan was listening but a couple years ago Logan was at Kendall's house for father's day and Mr. Garcia had said, _"You still wearing that old thing?"_ Mr. Diamond had added_, "That went out of style so long ago man."_ And Mr. Knight finished with, _"Haven't you out grown that think by now?" _Without missing a beat Logan's father said, _"I'll never out grow a gift from my son."_ Logan felt tears finally roll down his face. He closed his eyes tightly tightening his jaw to prevent any sound from coming out of him. He tightened his hold on the jacket, hugging himself as the jacket rested against his chest. His body began to shake so much that Logan didn't think he could hold himself up any more. Logan turned around and sat on his father's bed. He continued to cry silently not even noticing when someone approached the room.

"Hey Logan do you need any help…" Kendall stopped when he spotted Logan. He made he's way over to the opposite side of the room. And knelt in front of him. "Logan, do you want to go back home… let everyone else finish here?" Logan felt bad but he nodded his head anyway, he couldn't stand being here anymore. Kendall stood up and helped Logan up. He went to take the jacket and throw it in the box but Logan held on to it more tightly. Logan looked up at Kendall tears still rolling down his face.

"Can I keep this… please?" Kendall kissed Logan on the forehead and nodded his head. Logan seemed so sad and lost. He was like a child in a store that couldn't find his mom." Kendall wrapped his arm around Logan's waist and led him out the door. Most of the furniture had been moved but they still had a ways to go before everything was packed and ready to go.

"Mom, I'm going to take Logan home." Mrs. Knight looked up from what she was doing frowning when she spotted Logan. She nodded tearing up slightly when she spotted what Logan was clutching in his hands.

"Ok, we should be here for another hour and a half so if you get hungry there is food in the frig." Kendall nodded and started walking out the door. He stopped when he heard someone call his name.

"Kendall, wait." Mrs. Diamond walked out of the kitchen huffing slightly from all the physical labor they had been doing. "Why don't I drive you two back." She turned to Mrs. Knight. "I'll pick us up some food on the way back. "Mrs. Knight nodded and the three of them left. When they got back to the apartment Kendall sat Logan down on the couch and walked to the kitchen to get them both water. Logan was looking at the jacket his breath hiccupping every so often. He reached into one of the pockets and found a piece of paper. Logan unfolded it and looked it over quickly. Logan quickly noticed it was like a list.

_Places to go for Logan's 17th:_

_Museum_

_Bookstore_

_Vin's pizza parlor special order cheeseless pizza_

_ice cream parlor_

_car dealership to get rid of metal death trap_

Logan smiled a little. His father never liked the car Gustavo got them because he thought it wasn't safe enough.

_Observatory _

_Veggie Heaven_

_ Note to self: get Kendall gift for being around for Logan._

Logan laid the paper on the couch next to him started sobbing. His birthday wasn't for another 2 months and his dad had already started planning for it. He even wanted to get Kendall something for loving Logan so much. Logan pulled his knees to his chest and buried his face in the jacket that was still lying on his lap. He wrapped his arms around his knees as he shook with the force of his sobs. Kendall came back over and set the two glasses of water down on the table. He sat next to Logan and pulled him over so he was lying against his side. Kendall stroked Logan's side trying to give him some comfort.

"It's ok… let it out." Logan fisted Kendall's shirt and laid his head against his chest. He felt like all the pain he had been keeping inside since the second day at the hospital was finally coming out again.

"I miss him so much! It's not fair! He supposed to be here… for me." Logan closed his eyes tightly trying to while the pain to go away.

"I know… but it's going to be ok Logie." Logan buried his face in Kendall's shirt as he let out a particularly powerful sob.

"NO IT'S NOT!" Logan's words were muffled by Kendall's shirt but Kendall was still able to feel the full force of the anger and sadness behind his words. "He's supposed to be here for when Big Time Rush gets big, or when we graduate high school, or get married, or have kids but he isn't because he's gone and I'll never see him again!" Kendall sat him and Logan up and cupped Logan's face.

"He'll be there Logan. He is always going to be there for you. You may not be able to see him but he'll be there and he is going to be so proud of you." Logan tightly closed his eyes as he let out another sob. Kendall kissed Logan's lips then his cheeks repeatedly. He didn't care that Logan's face was wet from tears. He continued to kiss Logan. Kendall pulled Logan into a hug and rocked him back and forth. When Logan's sobs quieted done to sniffing Kendall pulled away and gave Logan the glass of water he had abandoned before. Logan took a sip then gave it back to Kendall sniffing slightly. "Let's go to bed." Kendall helped Logan up and walked him over to their room. Logan was still holding his father's jacket as Kendall laid them both on the bed. Kendall rubbed Logan's side until Logan drifted off into sleep. Kendall kissed Logan's forehead and sighed. If this was him today how was he going to be tomorrow for the funeral? Kendall let out another sigh and closed his eyes, drifting off to sleep.

**A/N: That's then end of this chapter. I felt like it was dragging at the end. Probably because I started watching Lopez tonight and would stop typing ever few seconds to watch lol. Well anyway I hope you enjoyed this chapter.**

**There is more to come. =]**


	36. saying goodbye for good

Logan stood in front of his mirror looking at himself. He was wearing a black suit, the same one he had worn to the trial. Logan sighed at the memory. He never realized how easy he had it then. Doing that was 100 times easier then what he was going to do now. Logan turned to face the door when he heard someone walk in. Kendall was already wearing his suit and Logan couldn't help but notice that he looked great in it. If it was any other occasion he would have told Kendall how sexy he looked but today wasn't the day for that. Logan laid his head against Kendall's chest when he wrapped his arms around his waist.

"Are you ready?" Logan bit his lip and looked up at Kendall.

"No, I'll never will be ready for this but I have to do it… that's just the way it is." Kendall kissed Logan's lips softly.

"You're going to be ok. I'm here for you because I love you. I love you so much Logan." Logan smiled slightly pulling Kendall into another kiss.

"I love you too." When they left their room everyone was in the living room waiting for them. They wordless walked out the door and out of the Palm woods.

* * *

The funeral had started and it was going as smoothly as any funeral was expected to go. When Logan had first gotten there, there was a lot more people than he expected. Of course James, Kendall, and Carlos where there with their families but Gustavo, Kelly, and Griffin where also there and Mr. X was there and other kids from the Palm Woods had come. People that Mr. Mitchell had known from Minnesota even flew in so they could say their goodbyes. Logan kept close to Kendall feeling like he was the only thing keeping him together. When people would come over to him and offer their condolences Logan would accept them while tightening his grip on Kendall's hand. Every so often Kendall would have to lean close to Logan's ear and whisper that his hand was starting to go numb. Logan avoided the front of the room at all costs because that's where his father was. He wasn't sure if he could face him. Thinking about the last time he saw his father made the sting of tears come to his eyes. He didn't want to know what seeing him again would do to him.

"Logan." Logan turned toward Kendall who was sitting next to him towards the back of the room. They had gone to sit down when Logan confessed to Kendall that he needed a break. "Don't you want to say goodbye?" Logan leaned his forehead against Kendall's shoulders and shook his head. Saying goodbye would make everything real and it was real enough.

"I don't want to say goodbye… I don't want him to be gone." Logan was whispering but he could feel his voice rising slightly with the threat of tears. Kendall pulled Logan closer to him and kissed the top of his head.

"You and I both know you'll regret it." Logan sighed knowing Kendall was right.

"Ok… but please… stay with me." Kendall stood up and pulled Logan close to him.

"I'll never leave you." Kendall kissed Logan's forehead and walked him to the front of the room. When they reached the coffin Logan took in a deep breath. As Logan was stepping closer he noticed that people close by were starting to move away, they wanted to give him some privacy. When Logan stepped next to the coffin Kendall stayed back a little so Logan could have a moment but he still stay close enough that Logan knew he was there. When Logan peered into the coffin he could feel the sting of tears again. He softly placed his hand on the side and examined his father's face. He looked so peaceful that a part of Logan was saying he was just sleeping and if he shook him hard enough he would wake up. Logan held onto the side of the coffin tightly trying to resist the urge. Logan thought he was about to break when he felt hands gently fall over his. Logan flinched slightly but relaxed when he felt lips on the side of his neck. "It's ok." Logan removed his hands from under Kendall's and laced their fingers. He took in a breath and turned his attention back to his dad.

"Papa I…" Logan blushed and lowered his gaze. He felt a little weird doing this." Kendall seemed to sense this and squeezed Logan's hand reassuring him. Logan took in another breath and began again. "I'm going to miss you so much. I will never forget about you… I'll make you proud… I promise." Logan unlaced his and Kendall's hands giving him a signal to give him a moment alone. Kendall kissed the back of Logan's head and stepped over to the side. "G-goodbye Papa… I love you." Logan stood unmoving feeling like there was something else he needed to say. He glanced over at Kendall quickly to make sure he wasn't listening. "I'm sorry." Logan quickly moved away and wrapped his arms around Kendall's arm. He kept his eyes closed and buried his face in Kendall's arm not allowing him to see the look of confusion on Kendall's face. He heard what Logan said. Everyone moved to sit in the chairs when the priest stepped to the front of the room. Logan mostly blocked everything out and just stared into space. He was brought back to reality when he heard his name. Logan looked up to see the priest looking at him. "W-what?"

"Is there anything you would like to say?" Logan swallowed hard. He had thought of something to read, he even had it in his pocket but he suddenly lost his nerve. Logan opened his mouth but he couldn't get any words to come out. When he felt Kendall's arm wrapped around him gripping his waist he suddenly found himself nodding his head. The priest stepped to the side waiting for Logan to step up. Logan looked over at Kendall wide eyed silently begging him to not make him do this alone. Kendall stood up and walked to the front with Logan. He kissed the side of his head quickly and stood a few feet behind Logan. Logan looked around quickly. James and Carlos had been sitting next to him and Kendall. They were smiling at him trying to give him some reassurance. His friend's parents were sitting on the opposite side of the room also giving Logan reassuring looks. Logan pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket and unfolded it. He glanced down at it then looked up at everyone again.

"I… uh… just… uh wanted to read something… a p-poem." When no one made a move to mock or laugh at him Logan finally gained enough courage to read.

_No words I write can ever say  
how much I miss you every day.  
As time goes by, the loneliness grows;  
how I miss you, nobody knows.  
I think of you in silence,  
I often speak your name,  
but all I have are memories,  
and photos in a frame.  
No one knows my sorrow,  
no one sees me weep,  
but the love I have for you  
is in my heart to keep.  
I've never stopped loving you  
I'm sure I never will;  
deep inside my heart,  
you are with me still.  
Heartaches in this world are many  
but mine are worse than any.  
My heart still aches as I whisper low,  
I need you and I miss you so.  
The things we feel so deeply  
are often the hardest to say,  
but I just can't keep quiet anymore,  
so I'll tell you anyway.  
There is a place in my heart  
that no one else can fill;_

Logan clenched his jaw in an attempt to keep in a sob.

_I love you so, Dad  
a-and I always will._

_(author unknow)_

Logan silently folded the paper and stuck it in his pocket. He was doing all he could not to cry but when he felt someone pull him into a tight embrace he couldn't help but bury his face in their shoulder and let the tears fall. He didn't make any noise but he shook with the force of his silent sobs. He didn't know who he was hugging but he didn't really care. He knew it wasn't Kendall, he would have recognized him right away. After taking in a breath through his nose he was assaulted by the smell of cuda man spray instantly knowing it was James. James pulled away allowing Carlos to pull Logan into a tight hug. Logan let out a chocking noise making Carlos thinking he was sobbing.

"It's ok Logan you can cry."

"C-Carlos… killing me…" Carlos pulled away with a gasp allowing Logan to catch his breath.

"Sorry." Logan wiped his eyes and gave Carlos a smile.

"It's ok." After Logan hugged everyone they made their way out of the funeral home. They all got in their cars and made their way to the cemetery. After Logan said one more silent goodbye they buried his father and went home. Logan had just changed out of his suit and was finally recovering from crying so much. It was still pretty early but Logan wanted to take a nap before dinner. Logan crawled into his bed and was ready to sleep when Kendall walked in. Kendall moved to Logan's bed and sat down watching Logan for a moment. Logan glanced at Kendall a couple of times feeling a little self conscious with Kendall staring at him. "W-what?"

"Why did you say you were sorry?" Logan furrowed his eyebrows not understanding what Kendall meant. Kendall sighed. "When we were at the funeral, I heard you say you were sorry when you were saying goodbye to your dad… why?" Logan looked away from Kendall finding the ceiling more interesting. Logan swallowed hard, before speaking.

"I think you already know why." Logan's voice cracked as he talked, tears threatening to fall again. Kendall grabbed Logan's chin forcing him to look at Kendall.

"You can't possibly think it was your fault." Logan sat up suddenly filling a little angry.

"Of course it's my fault. How could it not be my fault?"

"It's not your fault it's Ryan's fault. He's the one who killed your father, not you."

"But Ryan was after me! My dad wouldn't have died if it wasn't for me!"

"Of course he protected you! He loved you! I would have done the same thing if I had been there!" Logan clamped his hands over his ears suddenly and started crying.

"DON'T SAY THAT!" Kendall watched Logan with wide eyes. Logan's sudden outburst scared him.

"What? Don't say what?"

"It's hard enough knowing two people died because I me! I don't want to think about losing you too!" Kendall grabbed Logan's hands pulling them down.

"Logan, there was nothing you could do! Your father choose to protect you and Ryan died because again, your father choose to protect you! And Ryan should be the last person you should be feeling guilty for. He deserved to die." Logan shook his head rapidly.

"No! He wasn't a good person but he didn't deserve to die! His family doesn't deserve to suffer… like me…" Logan let out a loud sob. "IT"S ALL MY FAUT!" Kendall cupped Logan's cheeks desperately.

"No its not! It's not your fault! It's not your fault!" Kendall shook Logan softly in order to get his attention. "Listen to me! It. is. Not. Your. Fault! There was nothing you could do to change what happened! Ryan would have died no matter what you did and your father would have protected you no matter what the cost. He loved you too much to let you die and it would kill him if he knew you were blaming yourself!" Logan fisted the front of Kendall's shirt still sobbing; Kendall could feel he was starting to get through to Logan. "It wasn't your fault, you didn't do anything wrong." Kendall pulled Logan to his chest rocking him. Logan buried his face in Kendall's shirt and wrapped his arms tightly around his torso, fisting the back of his shirt.

"Why do I feel so guilty?" Kendall kissed the top of Logan's head gently whispering sweet nothings to him. "Why does everyone have to die because of me?" Kendall pulled away from Logan to look at his face again.

"Stop worrying about Ryan. He made his own bad choice and he paid the price for it. If his family is suffering it's his own fault **not** yours. And your dad was a good person; he would never blame you for anything. Dads are supposed to protect their families, he did his job and there was nothing you could do to stop him. It is **not** your fault." Logan pulled away from Kendall and sat towards the end of the bed. He looked at Kendall sadly then turned away tightly shutting his eyes.

"But it is my fault! It has to be! It's not a coincidence that both my parents are dead!" Kendall stared at Logan for a long moment.

"What are you talking about?"

"My dad died because of me and my mom died because of me too." Kendall sighed heavily and inched closer to Logan.

"Don't be ridiculous your mom was in a car accident because she got drunk. You weren't even there."

"BUT I WAS THERE!" Logan buried his face in his hands and cried harder.

"I thought you were home when she was in the accident?" Logan looked up at Kendall.

"I was but… you don't get it. She got drunk and she went to go buy more beer and I tried to hide the car keys from her but she hit me and I gave in. I gave her the keys… she wouldn't have been driving if it wasn't for me!" Kendall pulled on Logan's arm so they were facing each other. He stared at Logan intensely making Logan want to look away. Kendall grabbed Logan's chin forcing him to look forward. Logan let out a sob and shut his eyes tightly; he didn't want to see the look Kendall was giving him. He felt like he was staring into his soul, it made him feel naked and more vulnerable.

"Look at me." Logan opened his eyes shaking. The tone in Kendall's voice scared him. "The only mistake you have ever made is blaming yourself for things you had no control over. You were nine and you only wanted to obey your mom because even after everything she did to you, you still respected the fact that she was your parent and you had to do what she said. She used her authority over you to get what she wanted and in the end it killed her. Stop blaming yourself." Logan didn't reply. He stayed motionless and simply cried. He dropped his gaze from Kendall and wiped his nose with the back of his hand.

"I'm sorry…" Kendall's face softened and he lifted Logan's chin again. Logan flinched and tensed but he relaxed when he saw that Kendall's expression had changed.

"It's ok; just promise me you won't blame yourself anymore." Logan nodded his head. Kendall pulled Logan towards him and pressed their lips together softly. "I'm sorry I scared you. I just can't stand the fact that you were hurting yourself. No one is allowed to hurt you, not even you." Logan took in a breath and smiled at Kendall. He wrapped his arms around Kendall's neck deeply kissing him. Logan opened his mouth when he felt Kendall's tongue lick his bottom lip. He moaned when their tongues met and began to battle for dominance. Logan surprised Kendall by winning their tongue war by pushing Kendall back and straddling his hips. Logan threaded his fingers threw Kendall's hair and unconsciously tugged. He gasped when Kendall let out a low guttural growl and flipped them so he rested between Logan's legs. Kendall bent down and attacked Logan's neck. He sucked and bit the skin there feeling more turned on with every moan and whimper that escaped Logan's mouth. Kendall let out another growl and was about to rip Logan's shirt off when the bed room door opened. Kendall shot up into a sitting position to see James standing by the door.

"Uh… sorry did I interrupt something." James was trying not to smirk. Logan was resting on his back leaning on his elbows with a huge blush on his face. He was breathing heavily and James could see the lustful look in his eyes. The look in Kendall's eyes kind of scared James. His body was tense and his eyes were blazing, he looked absolutely primal. "Mama Knight made dinner so you should come out and eat. You should probably compose yourselves first… especially you Kendall, you look like you're about to grab Logan and fuck him into the floor."

"JAMES!" Logan had grown ten shades redder at his comment but he couldn't help but be a little turned on. James walked away laughing probably going to go tell Carlos about what just happened. Logan sighed feeling the warmth leave his face. When he sat up and looked to Kendall the blush returned. Kendall's eyes were dark and his muscles tense. Everything about him at that moment was screaming lust and arousal. He really did look like he wanted to grab Logan and fuck him senseless. Logan gulped standing up quickly. "Y-you should probably take a cold shower before you go out to the kitchen." Logan quickly walked out of the room not looking back. He could feel Kendall's eyes burning into his back until he was out of Kendall's view. He knew that he was going to pay for leaving Kendall alone and aroused like that but he couldn't help but feel turned on as thoughts of what Kendall would do to him played through his mind. Maybe he would be ok after all.

**A/N: and that's the end of that. Oh do I sense one more hot hot HOT chapter coming on. Oh yes I do lol. Well there are probably only at the most 4 more chapters left. Remember I said I wasn't going to go higher than 40. So enjoy this while it last cause it's almost over! Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I didn't write that poem. it was by an unknown author... I'm not that creative... i found it on the internet lol. **

**There is more to come! =]**


	37. hot

Logan was lying by the pool and trying his best to relax. It had been two weeks since the funeral and he was doing a lot better. He missed his dad more than anything but he knew he could go on. His dad would want him to move on and he would make his father proud. James and Carlos' parents had stayed for a couple of days after the funeral. When they finally went home it was a tear fest for both families. Logan didn't go with James and Carlos to the airport. For one he figured his friends would want time with their parents and also he figured the situation would pull at his heart strings. Kendall's dad had left the day after the funeral. He wanted to leave before everyone else did to avoid things getting awkward. Even though Kendall's parents were divorced they kept in touch and were nice to each other. Logan was happy about that, it made it a lot easier for Kendall and Katie to deal with. Even with all that was going on though, it wasn't what was stressing Logan out. It was actually Kendall. Logan and Kendall hadn't fooled around in a long LONG time and it was starting to get to both of them. The completely primal look that Kendall had two weeks ago never completely faded and whenever they had a second alone Kendall would growl in Logan's ear and grind his crotch into his ass. The main problem was that they only ever got a second alone. They were always with James and Carlos and everyone was always in the apartment. A few days ago Logan had woken up with an aching erection and was tempted to drag Kendall to the big time rush mobile and fuck in it. The idea died when he remembered that he liked that car and didn't want to risk ruining it.

"Hey Logan." Logan looked up to see Carlos and James standing in front of him.

"Hey what's up?"

"James and I are going to go, go cart racing and then probably catch a movie. You wanna come?" Logan thought about it for a moment then shook his head.

"No, I'm fine here." James and Carlos nodded before walking away.

"Oh yea, Mrs. Knight and Katie left for the weekend. See you later tonight Logan!" Logan yelled a goodbye to his two friends before sighing and lying back down. He laid there for a moment before he shot up into a sitting position. He smirked before darting out of the pool area towards 2J. When he got there Kendall was walking around with just a towel on. He obviously just took a shower. Logan shut the door loudly and locked it behind him. Kendall looked up when he heard the noise.

"Hey Logie, where is everybody?" Logan smirked and started walking towards Kendall.

"James and Carlos are going to be gone all day and your mom and Katie are going to be gone all weekend." Logan stood in front of Kendall running his finger up and down his chest. When what Logan was insinuating sunk in Kendall's eyes darkened and he immediately pulled Logan into a teeth clashing kiss. Logan moaned as their lips moved together furiously. Kendall moved his hands down Logan's back until he reached his ass. He squeezed and then pulled back smacking harshly. Logan yelped into the kiss then moaned. Kendall lifted Logan up allowing Logan to wrap his legs around his waist. He ignored his towel that fell off and continued to walk over to their room. When they were in Kendall pushed Logan against the closed door so he would get a chance to lock it. When they reached the bed Kendall threw Logan down on it and watched him bounce a couple of times. He reached down and pulled his clothes off not bothering to take his time. When Logan was completely naked Kendall lifted him up and laid him back down in the middle of the bed. He crawled so he was on top of Logan and immediately grinded into him harshly. Logan moaned loudly arching his back to get more friction. Kendall propped himself on his elbows as he continuously grinded into Logan. Logan wrapped his legs around Kendall and moaned with every thrust of Kendall's hips. Kendall attached his lips to Logan's neck then moved to his face. He kissed his cheek and the corner of his mouth then moved to his lips again. They kissed passionately for a moment but then Kendall pulled back and let out a growl.

"I'm going to fuck you so hard." Kendall stopped thrusting and grabbed Logan's member. He furiously jacked him off and sucked on his nipple. "I'm going to make you cum until you can't cum anymore. Logan's moans got louder and Kendall could tell he was close to orgasm.

"Fuck Kendall!" Kendall sped up his hand and bit down on Logan's neck.

"Cum for me." Logan let out a long needy whine as his cum covered Kendall's hand and his chest. Kendall didn't give Logan time to recover and flipped him onto his stomach. He reached into the nightstand getting the lube before he pulled Logan's hips up. Kendall poured some lube onto his fingers and started spreading it around Logan's entrance. Logan moaned and bucked his hips backwards wanting Kendall to enter him. Kendall poured more lube on his middle finger and shoved it into Logan roughly. Logan ached his back and screamed as Kendall started thrusting his finger into him harshly. Kendall added a second finger and stretched Logan's entrance. Logan screamed when Kendall brushed over his prostate. Kendall rammed his fingers into Logan constantly hitting his prostate. He added a third finger loving the moans and whines coming out of Logan. "You gunna cum again Logie." Kendall harshly thrust his fingers into Logan.

"Yes!" Logan threw his head back and arched his back. Kendall rubbed his fingers over Logan's prostate viciously causing Logan to scream with his second release. He bucked his hips backwards shuddering from his particularly violent orgasm. Kendall pulled his fingers out of Logan and let him fall onto the bed. Kendall poured more lube onto his hand and stroked his own member. He moaned at his own touch and let out a growl when he noticed Logan was lifting his hips off the bed slightly just begging Kendall to enter him. Kendall flipped Logan over again and bent down to kiss him. As their lips moved together passionately Kendall aligned himself and thrust into Logan hard. Logan pulled away from the kiss and let out a loud moan. "Kendall!" Kendall growled and started thrusting slow and hard. He buried his face in Logan's neck kissing and licking every now and then. Kendall's thrust were so hard he lifted Logan's body half off of the bed with every thrust in. Logan clawed Kendall's back making him growl and thrust harder.

"You're so fucking tight." Kendall sped up his thrusts but still used the same force. Logan was moaning loudly and thrashing his head from side to side. His hips were up in the air as Kendall pounded into him. He could only hang on for dear life as the pleasure consumed him.

"Kendall!" Logan threw his head back and came hard. His legs locked around Kendall's waist and his hips stuttered with ever spurt of cum that came out of him. Kendall continued to thrust into Logan but showed no sign of reaching his own orgasm. After one more thrust Kendall pulled out and lifted Logan up. He laid him on his stomach towards the end of the bed and lifted his hips again.

I'm not done with you yet." Kendall pushed into Logan causing him to let out a needy whine. Logan held onto the wooden frame of the bed causing the whole bed to move and shake with every thrust of Kendall's hips. Kendall leaned down and kissed Logan's back as he pounded into him. Logan laid his head on the wooden baseboard moaning with every thrust of Kendall's hips.

"Don't stop." Kendall growled thrusting even harder. Logan's eyes began to roll back and his mouth hung open from the pleasure. Kendall could tell by the way Logan convulsed around him that he was close to cuming again. At the feel of his own orgasm coming on Kendall pulled out and flipped Logan over. He lifted him up and brought them both unto the floor. "What are you doing?" Kendall repositioned himself and looked up at Logan's face.

"Well James said I looked like I wanted to fuck you into the floor." Kendall leaned forward so their lips were inches apart. "So that's what I'm going to do." Kendall attached his lips to Logan's and thrust into him. He swallowed the high pitched whines that spilled from Logan as he pounded into him. Logan pulled away from the kiss and turned his head to the side gasping for air. Kendall laid his head against Logan's and shut his eyes tightly feeling his orgasm approaching. "I'm gunna come baby." Logan moaned and was meeting Kendall's thrusts.

"Me too. Cum in me Kendall," Logan whined, "cum in me." Kendall gave one powerful thrust causing Logan's hips to lift off the floor again. Logan screamed Kendall's name as he reached his peak. White dotted Logan's vision as he violently orgasmed. Kendall groaned his hips thrusting with ever spurt of cum he released. Logan moaned at the feel of Kendall filling him which only made Kendall cum more. Logan's eyes rolled back and pushed Kendall deeper into himself as his orgasm finished. When they both finished they plopped down onto the ground Kendall still inside Logan. They laid there for a long time before Kendall pulled out and carried Logan to the bed. Kendall plopped down next to Logan and pulled him over so they were cuddling.

"Not having sex with you for a while is worth it if it's like that when we finally do it." Logan nodded too tired to respond.

"I love you Kendall."

"I love you too." Kendall lifted his head up looking around. "When we wake up we should probably take a shower and clean up our room… there's cum everywhere." Logan chuckled and nodded in agreement. After they fell silent both boys fell asleep.

* * *

James and Carlos were walking through the hall of the Palm Woods exhausted. They had spent the whole day running around and goofing off.

"What do you think Kendall and Logan did all day?" James stopped and stared at Carlos.

"Really dude, I think it's obvious what they did all day. Have you looked at them at all recently? I was surprised Logan didn't jump Kendall in the middle of the apartment and start making out with him. They've looked like they've wanted to have sex for weeks. Carlos nodded in understanding. When they reached the door Carlos turned to James with a grimace.

"You don't think they're still doing it do you?"

"Probably, I'm sure it's been a while." Carlos sighed.

"I hope they're not loud." Carlos opened the door and walked in with James behind him. They stood silent for a moment before they heard a shower running. "I guess Logan or Kendall are taking a shower.

"Don't stop! Harder! Fuck! Harder!" James turned to Carlos with an expression that showed he was grossed out.

"You mean Logan **and** Kendall are taking a shower." They both groaned and walked over to the couch. James grabbed the remote and turned on the TV blasting it trying to drown out Logan's moans and whines.

"Cum in me Kendall!"

"Aw dude!" Carlos shoved a pillow over his head. "My virgin ears." James chuckled and turned the volume on the TV louder. After hearing a loud groan and moan James and Carlos assumed they had finished.

"Finally." James lowered the TV so it wasn't blasting anymore. After a few minutes the bathroom door opened and Kendall and Logan walked out. Logan was wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt while Kendall was just wearing sweat pants. Kendall was forcefully kissing Logan as he walked him backwards.

"How about the couch." Logan chuckled at Kendall.

"No, James and Carlos would kill us."

"Yea, don't do it on the couch! Especially since we're sitting on it!" Logan turned around wide eyed. James was covering his mouth to suppress a laugh while Carlos just looked annoyed.

"H-how long have you been there?" Logan squeaked out.

"Long enough." James chuckled out. "We defiantly enjoyed you shouting for Kendall to cum in you." James added sarcastically. Logan eyes widened even more and he blushed furiously. He speed walked to his and Kendall's room and shut the door behind him. Kendall sighed and walked over to the couch plopping down on it.

"I don't think I've ever seen someone so mortified." Kendall turned to James and glared at him.

"It's your fault."

"No it's his fault for being a screamer." Kendall narrowed his eyes at James but couldn't help but chuckle. He sat forward leaning his arms on his legs as he turned his attention to the TV.

"Kendall what happened to your back?" Kendall turned to Carlos then glanced over his shoulder at his back.

'What do you mean?" Kendall stood up still trying to see over his shoulder.

"It looks like you were clawed by a cat." James started laughing again making Carlos look at him.

"More like clawed by a Logan." Kendall stopped trying to look at his back and glared at James.

"Oh shut up."

"You should probably not walk around shirtless for a while. If you think Logan is embarrassed not just imagine how embarrassed he would be if you walked around the pool with claw marks on your back. Everyone would know what you did." Before Kendall could reply a voice came from the other room.

"KENDALL PUT ON A SHIRT!" James laughed as Kendall walked over towards his and Logan's room.

"Yes dear." He said sarcastically as he entered the room.

**A/N: feelin hot hot hot. Dun nuh nuh na dun nuh nuh na. lol. Well here was the hot hot chapter I promised. Lol. I hope you enjoyed it =]**

**I probably won't be able to update until Sunday or Monday. My mom is coming to visit and I am not writing around her. Lol anyway this story is almost over. I hope you enjoyed it. I already have to first chapter for my next story done. I'll give you a hint. It's a companion fic to this story and it's called… **

**June 10****th****. **

**If you paid attention you should have some idea about what it's about. =] Anyway!**

**There is more to come. **


	38. lets talk

Logan's eyes fluttered open and he lifted his hand up to block the light coming in from the window. When his eyes finally adjusted he lowered his hand down and turned his head. Logan smiled when he was met with the sleeping form of his boyfriend. Their faces were so close together their noses were touching. They were both nude and Kendall was lying on his stomach with his arm across Logan's chest while Logan was on his back with his arm trapped under Kendall. If you're asking the question, didn't they have cloths on when they went to bed? Well yesterday had been a very fun day. Logan turned his head smiling at the memory. He blushed a little remembering how rough Kendall was and what made Logan blush even more was that he liked it. From Kendall's hard thrusts, to his dirty talk, and to the multiple locations and positions they tried, Logan enjoyed it all. Logan slowly freed his hand from under Kendall and sat up. He was a little sore from the hours of abuse to his backside but he didn't care. He was surprised they had the stamina for what they did. They had done it all day and all night to the dismay of his friends of course. They must have banged on the wall a hundred times but Logan and Kendall would just go at it again and try and make less noise (they failed of course). Logan cringed when he spotted Kendall's back. There was a lot a scratch marks and Logan felt really bad for doing that to Kendall. Logan quietly crawled out of bed and went to his closet. He grabbed the first aid kit and sat back down next to Kendall. Logan began to clean Kendal's back while he slept. After a minute Kendall woke up. He stared at Logan confused before shivering from something cold hitting his back.

"Sorry, I really did some damage back here. I just wanted to clean you up so these cuts don't get infected." Kendall nodded in understanding and remained on his stomach while Logan continued to work. When Logan leaned forward so he could reach farther Kendall grabbed his ass. Logan yelped almost dropping the cotton ball he was using. "Kendall stop that." Logan playfully hit Kendall's shoulder but Kendall didn't remove his hand.

"What about you, I'm pretty sure I did some damage back here too." Kendall continued to rub Logan's butt making Logan blush.

"No I'm fine. It wasn't bad," Logan's blush grew, "I actually… liked it." Kendall raised an eyebrow and smirked at Logan.

"My little Logie likes it rough huh? Well I'll have to remember that, I wouldn't want to disappoint." Logan was almost done and didn't realize Kendall's hand was moving towards his entrance. Logan gasped when he felt a finger making a lazy circle around his hole. Logan dropped whatever he was holding and grasped onto Kendall. When Kendall sat up Logan's grip on him slipped and he fell forward. Logan didn't pay much attention to that as he rested his head on the bed and moved his hips trying to get Kendall to do more. Kendall pushed his finger in making Logan burry his face in the bed and moan. "Logie if you really like it rough… Let's see how rough we can get." Before Logan could reply Kendall moved Logan to the center of the bed and thrust into him. Logan screamed out from the slight pain and lack of preparation and lube. Kendall gave Logan a second to get used to it before he pulled almost all the way out and plunged back in. Logan let out a needy whine as Kendall pounded into him relentlessly. Because of the previous day's activities and the pleasure Logan was feeling now he was left with almost no energy. Logan kept his head against the bed and his arms bent next to him as he clutched the sheets for dear life.

"You're so good Kendall! Oh god you're so good!" Logan's eyes rolled back when he felt Kendall find his prostate. Kendall smirked and slowed down his thrusts. He pulled almost all the way out and stopped loving how Logan whined and bucked his hips backwards.

"You like that Logie? You want more?" Logan nodded his head and continued to move his hips backwards. Kendall thrust in hard without warning causing Logan to let out a scream. Kendall pulled slowly out again then thrust in hard making Logan's knees rise off the bed. "Is this good baby? You like when I fuck you hard?" Kendall thrust in again making Logan scream.

"YES! Oh god yes!" Kendall smirked and sped up his thrusts again. He growled when he felt Logan's walls convulse around him when he came. Kendall continued to thrust into Logan making cum spurt out of him with every hit to his prostate. After five spurts Logan screamed his orgasm becoming too much. Because Kendall kept hitting Logan's prostate he continued to experience his orgasm. Logan mouth hung open saliva slipping out of his mouth as he continued to face waves of absolute pleasure. After about 15 spurts of cum Logan felt like he couldn't cum anymore. Kendall gave 1 more hard thrust making Logan give 1 more spurt of cum before he himself came. Kendall let out a long moan, the force of his orgasm making him thrust into Logan three more times. This caused Logan to throw his head back and cry out as three more spurts of cum were forced out of him. Kendall pulled out of Logan and let him fall to the bed. Logan was breathing heavily, saliva still dripping out of his mouth. When Kendall caught his breath he leaned forward and kissed Logan on the cheek.

"Did you like that Logie?" Logan let out a moan and nodded his head. He opened his eyes and stared up at Kendall.

"So good… to good… I can't take anymore… can't cum anymore. I think I just lost enough cum to impregnate the whole world. I'm good for a month." Kendall chuckled and kissed Logan again.

"Are you really not going to have sex with me for a whole month?" Logan smiled at Kendall and pulled him into another kiss.

"No, give me a week." Kendall agreed and helped Logan clean up. When they changed the sheets on the bed and got dressed Logan and Kendall left their room and was met by two very angry and very tired people. Carlos and James glared at the two as they walked into the kitchen and grabbed something to eat. Logan kept his head down blushing while Kendall smiled at his two friends sheepishly.

"Really?" Was the only thing James said. Kendall chuckled awkwardly as he took a sip of his drink.

"I guess we kept you two up huh."

"Yea you did." Carlos replied angrily. "You did it all day and all night and then you did it 10 minutes ago!" Carlos pointed at Logan who was now looking up. "I'm going to put a chastity belt on him if you can't control your urges!" Logan's jaw dropped and Kendall started laughing hysterically. The image he had in his head of Logan in one of those things was hilarious. "This isn't funny!" Kendall composed himself and smiled apologetically at Carlos.

"I'm sorry we kept you up. How about I buy you something to make it up to you." Carlos immediately smiled at his friend. He wasn't actually that mad at Kendall. The whole situation actually made him a little curious. He planned on asking Logan later if sex was really as good as it sounded. And if it was he was definitely going to go find Stephanie. She had been insinuating things to Carlos for a while, he was thinking of taking her up on her offer. It had taken Kendall a little more convincing to get James to forgive him. Lack of sleep was one thing he did not tolerate but when Logan offered to buy him a cuda product care package he just had to forgive them. When the boys finished breakfast the four of them decided to go to the pool. They quickly got dressed and found themselves lounging in their usual spots in a matter of no time.

"I'm gunna go get a smoothie, you guys want anything?" Kendall looked to his three friends who seemed to be thinking it over.

"Can you get me a strawberry?" Kendall smiled at Logan and kissed his forehead.

"Of course."

"Get me banana!" Carlos exclaimed." Kendall nodded then looked to James.

"I'll just go with you." Kendall nodded and walked over to the smoothie bar leaving Carlos and Logan alone.

"Hey Logie… can I ask you something?" Logan sat up noticing the awkward tone in Carlos' voice.

"Yea Carlos you can ask me anything."

"Is sex really that good?" Logan's jaw dropped and he blushed furiously. He looked around to see if anyone had heard Carlos before scouting over so they could talk more quietly.

"Why are you asking me that?" Logan squeaked out. Carlos looked at Logan like he had grown a second head.

"I would think it was obvious Logan."

"Well excuse me for being embarrassed about talking about my sex life!" Logan hissed out. Carlos was actually surprised a person's face could get that red.

"Can you just answer?" Logan sighed and dropped his gaze from Carlos.

"Yes Carlos it is very good. Happy." Carlos nodded slowly seeming to be deep in thought about something. "Why are you asking me this anyway?"

"Well Stephanie has been giving me… signals." Logan furrowed his eyebrows.

"What do you mean signals?"

"She wants to have sex with me." Logan's eyes widened.

"Are you sure? What did she do?" Carlos pulled out his phone and pressed a few buttons before shoving it in Logan's face.

"She sent me this with a message attached to it saying if you ever want to come over, I'll be wearing this." Logan looked at the picture wide eyed.

"But she's naked…"

"Exactly." Logan closed Carlos' phone and gave it back to him.

"Carlos… do you think you're ready for that?" Carlos thought about it for a moment then nodded his head.

"I think so."

"But Carlos… don't just do it because me and Kendall do it. And also it's different with Stephanie. There are more risks. Kendall can't get me pregnant. You have to be prepared. You can't just decide one day that you want to do that. You have to have protection. Do you have condoms?" Carlos shook his head. He never really thought about what he needed to do before having sex. He didn't really think it would be that different from what Kendall and Logan did. Logan sighed. "Carlos… I don't know if you're ready. Maybe you should talk to Stephanie about it first. There is a chance that she may not be as ready as she thinks she is. Do you know if she is on birth control?"

"Well she has this little blue case thingy and she said it was "the pill." That's birth control right?" Logan nodded.

"Well at least you know she's prepared. Carlos please think about it before you do anything. Kendall and I waited until we were ready to have sex so just promise me you'll do the same." Carlos smiled and nodded.

"Logie… do you think you can come with me when I buy condoms?" Logan's blushed returned but he nodded. He needed to make sure his friend didn't get a cheap kind out of a vending machine or something (1). When Kendall and James returned they handed Carlos and Logan their drinks. Logan's blush still hadn't faded so Kendall stared at him confused for a moment.

"Babe, why are you blushing?" Logan blinked and felt his face. He had hoped the blush had faded but from the heat coming off him he could tell it didn't.

"It's nothing." Kendall set his lip in a line. Logan only blushed when he was embarrassed about something and usually the embarrassment had to do with sexuality.

"Did someone hit on you or something?" Kendall was looking around feeling a little angry. Logan blinked then grabbed Kendall's arm to get his attention.

"No one hit on me… me and Carlos were just… having a talk." Logan looked to Carlos trying to figure out if it was ok to talk about what had just been said. When Carlos nodded Logan felt a little relieved. James and Kendall looked at each other for a moment then looked back to Logan.

"had a talk? About what?" Logan's blush grew.

"well… you see…"

"I asked Logan about sex." Logan's blush grew at Carlos bluntness. Kendall and James Turned to Carlos with raised eyebrows. What would Carlos want to know about sex?

"What did you ask him?" Kendall glanced at Logan noticing his blush grow.

"If it was good." James snorted but shut his mouth when he received a glare from Carlos. Kendall shook his head at James. Carlos was obviously being serious so James wasn't being very supportive by laughing at him. Kendall turned back to Carlos turning the "I'm the leader and my best friend is confused and needs help" mood on.

"Why would you want to know that?" Carlos felt suddenly uncomfortable. Now he knows why Logan gets so mortified whenever someone brings up the subject of sex.

"Well… I was thinking that I was ready… to have… sex." Carlos looked down blushing slightly. James and Kendall looked at each other then back to Carlos.

"With who?" James and Kendall exclaimed simultaneously. Carlos looked up at them like they had grown a second head. Wasn't it obvious?

"Stephanie!" Kendall set his lip in a line. He wasn't so sure about this and he didn't like the idea of one of his best friends taking a huge step like that without really considering the outcome.

"Carlos… are you sure… I don't know if…" James trailed off. He didn't want to put Carlos down but he didn't really think he was ready. He could tell from Logan and Kendall's faces that they thought the same. The only problem was Kendall and Logan were sexually active so if they said anything they would sound hypocritical and neither of them wanted to do that. Before Carlos could get angry Logan jumped in.

"You don't have to worry James me and Carlos talked about it already. He thinks he's ready but not at this very moment. He still has some stuff to do first. Right Carlos." Logan gave Carlos a look reminding him of the conversation he had with Logan before James and Kendall came over. He knew what Logan said was right so he nodded his head. James and Kendall still looked a little uneasy about the idea. It was different with Carlos. He was straight. If it was James instead of Carlos James knew Kendall and Carlos would be acting the same way. Carlos is not ready to be a farther if something goes wrong and that's what his three friends were thinking of. The four boys fell silent for a moment. They were each thinking about the conversation they just had and trying to find a way to remove the awkward air that seemed to settle around them. Carlos sat up suddenly as an idea came to him. He smirked and looked over at Kendall and James who were both laying back with their eyes closed. Carlos stood up and crept passed his friends. He noticed Logan was watching him so he put his finger to his mouth giving him the "sh" signal. Logan laughed to himself while shaking his head. He couldn't imagine what his friend was up to. Carlos walked behind the Sims twins who were sitting together and reading. Carlos took their bags that were on the ground behind them and ran back over to his friends. He placed the bags next to James and Kendall and pretended to be asleep. Logan's eyes went wide and when he noticed the twins looking around for their stuff he rolled onto his side pretending to be asleep to. He didn't want to be grouped in with James and Kendall. He loved Kendall but those chicks were crazy. Carlos and Logan watched with one eye open as the twins walked over to them and immediately noticed their bags.

"James!"

"Kendall!" James and Kendall bolted up and looked around. They spotted the two girls in front of them and looked at them confused.

"Yes."

"Why did you take our bags?" Kendall looked down at his lap and noticed the large purse. He looked over at James who also had a purse on his lap. When did that get there?"

"We didn't take your.." Before James could finish the two girls had yanked the boys up by their shirts and threw them in the pool. They took their bags glaring at the water before walking off. James and Kendall climbed out and looked around.

"What the hell just happened?" Kendall's thoughts stopped when he heard two different sets of snickering. James and Kendall looked over to see Carlos and Logan trying (and failing) to pretend that they are asleep. Carlos cracked open his eyes just in enough time to see James running at him. Carlos yelped and jumped up. James chased him around the pool while Carlos laughed. Logan was watching when he noticed Kendall walking to him with a devious smirk. Logan sat up and put his hands out defensively.

"Don't hurt me I'm injured!" Kendall chuckled and sat next to Logan on the lounge chair.

"Don't worry Logan I would never hit you and I know for a fact that that was all Carlos. Logan smiled at Kendall but turned away when he heard a yelp. James had Carlos in a head lock while Carlos thrashed his arms around trying to get free. Logan laughed but suddenly thought about how that seen looked familiar. He remembered that he had been doing the exact same thing to Carlos… when Ryan showed up again. Logan shivered at the memory causing Kendall to look at him concerned.

"Logan, you ok?" Logan nodded.

"It's nothing really. I just… got a Déjà vu feeling a guess." Kendall furrowed his eyebrows.

"About what?"

"Well um when me, James, and Carlos were hanging out here a few months ago and I did that to Carlos. That was the day that Ryan showed up again." Logan looked at his lap. Kendall would probably be annoyed that he brought Ryan up again. He probably though Logan was being a baby and that he should get over it. Logan looked up when he felt Kendall's hand on his thigh.

"It's ok. You're not going to forget about it over night. It's going to take time, but remember he can't hurt you anymore. Logan smiled at Kendall then turned his attention back to James and Carlos. He laughed at his two friends fully enjoying that they could all be happy again.

**A/N: YEY! Chapter done. There is going to be two more chapters so it will be an even forty. But really there is only going to be one more chapter that actually is the story. Chapter 40 will be some extra stuff. =] well I hope you enjoyed this chapter**

**There is more to come. **


	39. date night for all

**A/N: ok… I forgot say something at the end of the last chapter. Jeez I always do this! Anyway…**

**(1): my school literally has condoms in the vending machines. It goes Reese's, snickers, milkway… condoms. And usually next to that are tampons lol. Anyway! On to the chapter**

"I am not buying those for you!" Logan hissed. "I helped you pick them out I never said I would actually go up to the counter with them!" Logan was looking around making sure no one he knew was around. The last thing he needed was to explain why he and Carlos were buying condoms in the convenient store.

"Come on Logie! I don't want to do it!" Carlos gave Logan a puppy dog look but Logan just shoved his hand in Carlos' face and pushed him towards the front counter.

"Hell no. You want the condoms you pay for them." Carlos pouted and huffed before walking over to the counter. He cursed to himself when he realized it was a girl. Carlos put the box on the counter and kept his eyes down. He Gave the girl a twenty and took his change never looking at her (**A/N: idk how much condoms are… never had to buy them but they can't be more than twenty… right lol)**

Carlos walked back over to Logan who had moved to the front of the store. When Logan went to walk outside he ended up bumping into someone. "Oh I'm sorry I didn't mean to KELLY?" Carlos immediately hid the bag of condoms behind his back.

"Hey boys, what are you doing here?" They both looked at each other and let out nervous laughs.

"Oh you know… just getting some things." Logan smiled and started inching toward the door hoping Kelly wouldn't ask that one question that almost anyone would ask.

"Oh… what did you get?" Carlos and Logan looked to each other with expressions that said "fuck!" Kelly eyed them for a moment then crossed her arms. "You guys better not be doing anything that will get you in trouble with Gustavo or the record company." Logan made a "pff" noise and waved away Kelly's suspicions.

"No!" He said in a too high pitched voice. "We would never. We're just getting some… snacks! You know us teen age boys gotta eat." Logan let out another nervous laugh. Carlos and Logan held in a sigh of relief when Kelly seemed to buy their story.

"Ok well I'll see you boys later." They both said goodbye to Kelly before walking towards the door. Before Carlos could even think to control his volume he turned to Logan.

"Well that was close." Logan cringed and looked back to see Kelly had turned around and was glaring at them.

"Carlos!" Logan hissed out. This was going to get real awkward real soon. Kelly pointed at the boys with her finger then pointed at the floor near her. They sighed heavily and dragged their feet over.

"What's going on?" Kelly grabbed the bag before Carlos could react. She looked inside then looked back up at the boys with a raised eyebrow. "Please tell me you bought these for some prank." Logan sighed and shook his head. "Boys…"

"It's just precautionary!" Carlos exclaimed. Logan nodded hoping Kelly would just drop the subject. Kelly sighed and handed them back the bag.

"Ok fine. But remember Gustavo will literally kill you if you knock someone up." Carlos nodded and he and Logan went back to the Palm Woods.

* * *

Logan let out a sigh as he plopped down on the couch in 2J. The minute Logan and Carlos returned home Carlos went to his room to get ready for his date with Stephanie. Logan turned the TV on and began to channel surf. He stayed like that a long time until his attention was redirected to Carlos. He was wearing black jeans, a button down shirt, a black vest and black tie. He looked perfect… except for the helmet. "Carlos, you're not really going to wear your helmet are you?" Carlos raised his hands up to his head and felt the helmet.

"I'm nervous. My helmet makes me feel better." Logan sighed and gave his friend a sympathetic smile.

"You'll be fine Carlos but remember, don't do anything you're not ready for." Carlos nodded before saying goodbye to Logan and heading out the door. Logan sat back and started watching TV again. He looked around the apartment wondering why it was so quiet. He knew James was out on a date and Carlos just left for his date, but were where the Knights? "I wonder where Kendall is."

"Wonder no more my love." Logan jumped when he heard a voice from behind him. He looked up to see Kendall standing behind the couch smiling at him. Logan got up and walked around the couch.

"How long were you there?"

"Not that long." Kendall pulled his hand from behind him to reveal a bouquet of roses. "For you." Logan took the roses and admired them for a moment. He smelled them and took in their general appearance. Logan smiled as a blush came to his face.

"Thank you Kendall." Kendall smiled at Logan and pulled him close. He absolutely loved the way Logan looked when he blushed. He was adorable. Logan smiled as he pulled Kendall into a slow passionate kiss. When they pulled apart Kendall grabbed Logan's hand and started walking. When he reached the door to the balcony he turned towards Logan and pulled him close.

"Since everyone is out on a date tonight. I thought we should enjoy a date night too." Kendall pulled open the door to reveal a small two person table with a complete five star restaurant setting. There were plates, candles, and delicious food. Logan smiled at Kendall and kissed him again.

"I love you Kendall." Kendall smiled brightly and kissed Logan passionately.

"I love you too." Kendall took Logan's roses and placed them in a vase. Once he was done the two boys sat down at the table and began their date. They talked about everything and nothing occasionally fitting in kissing and touching into the mix. When they finished their meal they moved over to a lounge chair and lay on top of it. Kendall had gotten a blanket from outside and threw it over them. Logan sighed blissfully and snuggled into Kendall's side. His eyes were closed and he couldn't keep a smile from his face. Kendall watched Logan as he placed his head where Kendall's arm connected with his upper body and rubbed his face against Kendall like a cat. When Logan was finally settled he looked up at Kendall who was chuckling at him.

"What?" Logan said with a smile. Kendall lifted his hand up and stroked Logan's face. Logan closed his eyes and leaned into the soft touch.

"Nothing… you just so handsome… so beautiful." Logan opened his eyes and stared at Kendall for a moment.

"You think I'm beautiful?" Kendall nodded his head still smiling at Logan. Logan laid his head down on Kendall chest and breathed in deeply. Kendall wouldn't have thought much of it until he heard Logan sniff. Kendall lifted Logan's head up by his chin so he could see his face. He became alarmed when he realized Logan was crying.

"Logie what's wrong?" Logan wiped his eyes and smiled at Kendall.

"It's nothing… it's just that I never really saw myself as that good looking so to hear you call me that feels nice. No one's ever done that before." Logan put his hands to his eyes and wiped them furiously. "I'm sorry. God! I feel like such a girl." Kendall grabbed Logan's hands and held them in his.

"Logan you are beautiful. You're the most beautiful person in the world, inside and out. Your caring, sensitive, smart, understanding, wise, and you're willing to do anything for your friends. I love you so much." Logan blushed and bit his lip. He felt more "happy tears" fall as he processed what Kendall just said.

"Thank you Kendall. I love you too." Kendall smiled and wiped away Logan's tears. Kendall pulled Logan into a soft kiss smiling nearly the entire time. The kiss was soft and caring letting them show each other how much they loved the other. They kissed for a long time pulling apart and giving short pecks whenever they needed air. Kendall moved from Logan's mouth and kissed the rest of his face. Logan smiled as Kendall kissed his cheeks, nose, forehead, and his closed eyes. Kendall kissed Logan on the lips on last time before pulling away and laying his head back. Logan laid his head against Kendall's chest and looked up at the stars. The night sky was truly breathtaking. "Do you think he's with her?" Kendall looked down at Logan confused. "My dad, do you think he's with my mom. I hope their happy… I want them to be happy." Kendall kissed the top of Logan's head and ran his fingers threw his hair. He could hear the sadness in Logan's voice. Kendall could tell that Logan would get some relief if he knew his parents were happy together. He wouldn't feel bad about living his own life knowing his parents weren't suffering.

"Of course their happy Logan. They're together and their watching you, proud that you are who you are. They love you and they want you to be happy." Logan smiled feeling another lone tear fall down his cheek.

"I know."

* * *

After lying outside for a long time Kendall and Logan moved back inside. A few minutes after that James had returned home and had given them a complete run down of his date.

"It was amazing!" James exclaimed. "And to end the perfect night she kissed me." James sighed and looked up smiling. "It was good." Kendall and Logan shook their heads at their friend. Before James could talk anymore Carlos came barging through the front door. Kendall, James, and Logan watched confused as he stormed past them and went into his room slamming the door behind him.

"That can't be good." Logan stood up and started walking towards Carlos' room. James and Kendall were right behind Logan when he knocked on the door and peaked into the room. "Carlos?" Carlos was lying on his stomach with his face buried in his pillow. Logan walked over to him slowly and sat down on the bed. James and Kendall came over also sitting next to Logan. "Carlos, what happened?"

"I don't want to talk about it?" Carlos' voice was muffled because of the pillow but Logan could still hear him.

"Please Carlos. I want to help you."

"I can't! I'm so embarrassed…" Logan looked to Kendall and James but they were just as clueless on what to do as he was.

"Just tell us what happened Carlos." Kendall placed his hand on his friends back and patted a couple of times. Carlos sighed and turned his face to the side so he wasn't muffled anymore.

"The whole night was perfect. We went to a movie then to dinner. We even went for a walk in the park. She looked amazing and I just knew everything was right." Carlos sighed heavily. "We went back to her apartment and we started… I was really excited and she looked so hot and before I knew what happened…" Carlos buried his face in the pillow and let out an aggravated scream. "I'm such a loser!" Logan looked at Kendall and James. None of them were getting it.

"Then what happened Carlos?" Carlos sighed heavily and turned his head again.

"The space ship had an early launch." Logan titled his head taking a moment to fully understand what Carlos was saying. When he figured it out he made an "oh" face. Logan placed his hand on Carlos' shoulder.

"It's ok Carlos you don't have anything to be ashamed of. It happens."

"What did Stephanie say?" Carlos glanced at Kendall and let out another sigh.

"She doesn't completely know what happened. I ran into the bathroom and tried to… get it up again but I couldn't so I just told her the food must not have agreed with me and that I felt really sick. I think she might have suspected something but I'm not sure. If she knows she's probably going to tell everyone!" Carlos buried his face in the pillow and let out a loud angry/embarrassed scream.

"You don't have to be embarrassed that happens to a lot of people. Don't beat yourself up." Carlos turned to Logan and glared.

"It's not like it happened to you." Logan flinched at Carlos tone but he smiled when he remembered something.

"Actually… it did." Carlos turned over and sat up so he could look at Logan better.

"What?" Carlos dropped his astonished look then glared again. "You're lying." Logan shook his head at Carlos.

"I'm not." Carlos face softened and he turned to Kendall to see if Logan was telling the truth.

"Kendall?"

"He's not." Kendall chuckled and looked up towards the ceiling. "Heh… that was defiantly an ego bust." Logan punched Kendall in the shoulder.

"Oh shut up."

"Hey not everyone can make some cum just by the sound of their voice." Logan's eyes widened and he slapped Kendall's chest.

"KENDALL! You didn't have to go into detail you know!" Logan turned back to Carlos his face redder than ever. Carlos eyed his two friends for a moment then smiled at them.

"Did it only happen that one time?" Logan nodded his head.

"Carlos, just stay calm if you try again and you should be fine." Carlos nodded and smiled at his friend.

"Thanks." Logan smiled back at Carlos. James stood up from the bed and started walking out of the room.

"Ok! This conversation is taking an awkward turn so I think I'm gunna go…" The other three boys agreed and left the room.

* * *

The next day Carlos found himself at the pool lying on a lounge chair. He kept thinking about what happened and he hoped Stephanie didn't hate him.

"Carlos?" Carlos looked up a swallowed hard. It was Stephanie. Carlos sat up and sat cross legged giving Stephanie room to sit at the end of the chair. She sat down and watched him for a moment. Carlos kept his gaze on his lap just waiting for her to say something, to make fun of him or yell at him. "How are you feeling? Are you ok?" Carlos looked up to see genuine concern in her eyes.

"I'm… fine." Carlos dropped his gaze again. "About last night… I'm sorry." Stephanie sighed making Carlos look up at her.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. I should be sorry… I was pressuring you." Carlos shook his head at Stephanie.

"No you didn't pressure me. I wanted to but I guess things just… went wrong." Stephanie nodded in understanding then a smirk came to her face.

"Do you want to try again?" Carlos' eyes widened and a blush came to his face. The next thing he knew he was letting Stephanie take his hand and lead him to her apartment.

James walked into the pool area in just enough time to see Carlos walk off with Stephanie. He shook his head at his friend and walked over to one of the lounge chairs. An average height skinny blonde girl was laying on the chair tanning when James walked over. James sat down on the chair next to her getting her attention.

"Hi." The blonde girl smiled awkwardly at James.

"Hey…" James didn't seem to notice and continued talking.

"So I really enjoyed our date last night and I want to know if you would want to go out with me again." James was smiling at her and beaming with confidence.

"I had fun last night too but I don't think so." James smile faded.

"What why?" The blonde girl sat up and sighed.

"I don't think we… clicked. Well I better get going. I had fun James; I hope we can stay friends." James watched as she walked off. He sighed and left the pool. He dragged his feet and hung his head as he made his way back to apartment 2J. When he entered Logan was sitting on the couch with Kendall nowhere in sight.

"Hey… where's Kendall?"

"He went to get something for mama Knight." Logan looked up at James and frowned. "James, are you ok?" James plopped down next to Logan and let out a sigh.

"Jessica doesn't want to go out with me again." Logan furrowed his eyebrows.

"I thought you two had a good time on your date." James threw his hands up in frustration.

"That's what I thought! But no! Apparently we didn't click. But how can we not click. Everyone clicks with me! I'm James!" James lifted his hands in front of his face and moved them down as he moved his fingers around. (**A/N: you know that hand thing he does.)** Logan rolled his eyes and sat up slightly.

"Just because she doesn't like you doesn't mean it's the end of the world; you're just not her type. It happens. Like you said your James, you'll find a better girl in no time." Logan looked up for a moment in thought. "What about Rachael?"

"Sun block girl?" Logan nodded his head.

"She likes you." James nodded his head obviously thinking about it. He stood up with a smile and started walking towards the front door.

"Your right I'm going to ask her out. Thanks Logie!"

"You're welcome!" Logan chuckled as James left. Thank god he had Kendall, girls are way too complicated. When a knock came to the front door Logan sighed and got up. He wasn't sure who it was but he figured it was Carlos. He always forgets his key. Logan opened the door and was immediately confused. An older man and woman were standing in front of him awkwardly. "Hi, can I help you?" The man cleared his throat then glanced at the woman.

"Hello, my name is Edward Chester and this is my wife Rose. Your Logan Mitchell right?" Logan nodded his head. If he wasn't so confused his brain probably would have processed the information he just received a little faster. When it finally clicked he swallowed hard.

"Y-your Ryan's parents." They nodded and Logan.

"I know you probably don't want to see us but we would greatly appreciate it if we could talk to you… for a moment." Logan nodded and stepped out of the way so they could come in. He led them to the kitchen and stood by the kitchen table as they sat down.

"Uh… would you like something to drink? Tea… coffee." They both nodded.

"Tea would be lovely thank you." Mrs. Chester said. Logan made the tea quickly trying his best to analyze the situation. When the tea was done he moved to the couple and placed a cup in front of each of them. They thanked him and waited until he was seated across from them to begin talking. Mr. Chester spoke first.

"We wanted to speak to you sooner but with everything that happened we didn't think you would want us around. We just…" Logan waited patiently for him to continue but Mrs. Chester cut in.

"We are so sorry." Logan could tell the older woman was close to tears. "Our son hurt you so bad and we didn't do anything to help you. We should have seen what was going on, seen how he changed. If we had been better parents none of this would have happened." Mrs. Chester paused to calm herself. "We don't expect you to forgive us but we wanted you to know how sorry we are." Logan stayed silent for a moment then sighed.

"It's not your fault. You have nothing to be sorry for. I should be apologizing. Your son is dead because of me. You should hate me." Mrs. Chester reached her hand out and laid it over Logan's.

"You have nothing to be sorry for. We could never blame you. We do miss Ryan but none of what happened was your fault and we aren't the only ones who lost someone, you lost someone too." Logan nodded, tearing up at the memory.

"Is there any way you can forgive us?" Logan turned his attention to Mr. Chester.

"There is nothing to forgive but I do except your apology." Mr. and Mrs. Chester let out a sigh.

"Thank you." Before Logan could reply the front door opened. Kendall walked in holding two bags but when he spotted Logan he stopped. Kendall could tell Logan was on the verge of tears. He placed the two bags on the floor and walked over to Logan. Logan stood up and placed his hand on Kendall chest to get his attention.

"Kendall this is Mr. and Mrs. Chester." Kendall's jaw clenched when he recognized their last name.

"May I ask why you're here?" Kendall spoke politely but his facial expression didn't show any kindness.

"We wanted to speak to Logan… apologize." Logan spoke up before Kendall did to avoid a confrontation.

"Kendall why don't you give us a minute." Kendall narrowed his eyes but nodded and walked away. Mrs. And Mr. Chester stood up and shook Logan's hand.

"Thank you again Logan." After each of them said goodbye the Chester's left. Kendall walked back into the room as soon as he heard the door close.

"How could you forgive them Logie? None of this would have happened if it wasn't for their stupid son! You can't seriously…" Kendall was behind Logan for most of his rant. When he finally made it to his front he stopped. Logan was crying. "Logan."

"It wasn't their fault Kendall. Like it wasn't mine. They didn't need to apologize but they did anyway. They needed closure… I did to." Kendall pulled Logan into a hug and kissed the top of his head.

"I understand." Kendall and Logan kept hugging until Logan was done crying. He pulled away and wiped his eyes. Logan smiled at Kendall and kissed him on the lips softly. "Did I tell you I love you today?" Logan smiled and kissed Kendall again.

"Yes."

"Well I'm telling you again. I love you."

"I love you too."

* * *

Logan was making dinner when James and Carlos came in. They both had huge smiles on their faces when they walked over to the counter and sat down next to Kendall.

"Logan you're the best you know that." Logan smiled at James.

"Good day?"

"Great day! I'm going on a date with Rachael tomorrow." Logan turned to Carlos.

"What about you." Carlos jumped on the counter and looked down at his friends.

"I had a great day because I," Carlos put his stood in a superhero pose, "Am now a man." Logan, James, and Kendall raised their eyebrows at Carlos. He jumped down from the counter looking at them expectantly.

"No mishaps?" Kendall asked.

"Nope."

"Was it good?" James asked.

"I will never look at the world the same again." The four boys laughed as Logan finished making dinner and putting it out for all of them. He sat down and watched everyone for a minute. He let out a content sigh and smiled more when he felt Kendall grip his hand.

He really did have the best friends.

**A/N: and it's over…**

**Well I hope you enjoyed this story. The next chapter is some random extra stuff that you might enjoy. Including what happened with Carlos and Stephanie. =] **

**This story is now complete. When you read this the first chapter of my next story should already be up so go to my profile page and check it out! It's called June 10****th****. **


	40. carlos stephanie and more

Carlos/Stephanie:

Stephanie pulled Carlos into her apartment and attached their lips together. They had just had the most amazing date ever and they were going to finish it up in Stephanie's apartment. Carlos licked Stephanie's bottom lip asking her for entrance into her mouth. When she parted her lips he moved his tongue around her mouth making her moan. The sounds coming from Stephanie was making Carlos more excited with each passing minute. Carlos walked her backward until they finally reached her room. Carlos lifted her up and placed her on the bed. He climbed ontop of her and settled between her legs. Stephanie wrapped her legs tightly around Carlos' waist bringing their hips close together. She moved her hips in a circular motion making Carlos groan from the contact. Carlos pulled away from the kiss and unbuttoned Stephanie's shirt. He pulled it off of her and took a moment to admire her soft skin. Stephanie grabbed the hem of Carlos' shirt and pulled it up until Carlos had to take control to pull it off. Carlos attached his lips to Stephanie's again and thrust his hips forcefully into her. She moaned and wrapped her arms around his neck. Carlos was surprised when Stephanie was able to flip them over so she was straddling his hips. She bit her lip seductively as she moved her hips over Carlos' erection making him through his head back and groan. Carlos was so turned on right now that ever sound and touch was like lightning that went straight to his crotch. Stephanie climbed off of Carlos and stood in front of him. She slowly undid her jeans and slowly pushed them down making Carlos groan with desire. She undid her bra and let it fall to the floor, smirking at the look in Carlos' eyes. With a seductive look Stephanie removed the last of her clothing and stood before Carlos letting him look at her. She walked back over to Carlos and climbed on top of him.

"I want you Carlos." She took his hand and brought it down to her crotch. Carlos tentatively placed his hand there and became more confident with each moan that escaped Stephanie. When his finger moved over one particular area Stephanie let out a loud moan and moved her hips forward. Carlos continued to move his fingers over Stephanie's clit making her moan his name. Carlos was becoming so hot and turned on he didn't know how much longer he could wait. Suddenly Stephanie reached down and grabbed Carlos' dick through his pants. She moved her hand and squeezed making Carlos moan out and thrust his hips with surprise. The pleasure become too intense and he bit his lip to suppress a moan as he came. Carlos tried to keep his hips steady but the force of his orgasm made him thrust his hips into Stephanie. She didn't seem to understand what happened as she let out a moan when the rough material of Carlos' pants rubbed against her clit. Carlos cursed to himself and pushed Stephanie off of himself. She sat up surprised and stared at Carlos. "Carlos? What's wrong?"

"I uh… I don't feel so good." Carlos ran into the bathroom and shut the door behind him. He cursed to himself again and ripped his pants open. Cum was covering his leg and boxers. Carlos gripped himself shuttering at the touch on his sensitive skin. He ignored it and furiously jacked himself off. The feel of his hand was giving him pleasure but he wasn't getting hard. "Dam it. Come on!" Carlos hissed out. He moved his other hand to fondle his balls hoping it would work but it wouldn't. He just couldn't get hard again.

"Carlos? Are you ok in there?" Carlos put himself back in his pants and zipped them. He opened the door to see Stephanie standing in front of him looking worried. She had covered herself up with a robe.

"M-my stomach started hurting all of a sudden. I should probably go. Carlos could see something in Stephanie's eyes that said she was starting to figure out what happened. Before she could say anything Carlos walked past her grabbing his clothes before leaving her apartment.

* * *

Carlos was afraid that what happened last time would happen again but he tried to ignore that feeling as he laid Stephanie down on her bed. He pulled off all her clothes as she pulled off his. Carlos looked Stephanie over licking his lips as she did the same to him. He bent down and captured her lips as he moved his hand down to her core. She moaned into the kiss and bucked her hips as Carlos moved his fingers over her clit. Carlos moved his hand further down and entered her making her arch her back and moan. Carlos moved his finger in and out loving how tight and wet she was. She continued to moan as Carlos added another finger and sped up his thrusting.

"Carlos." Carlos could tell she was about to cum. He removed his fingers, ignoring how she protested and quickly moved down her body. When he attached his lips to her clit and licked and sucked it she arched her back and came hard. Carlos continued to lick her then moved back up her body. He grabbed the condom that he put next to them and let Stephanie pull it out and put it on him. Carlos moaned at the soft touches and then aligned himself when she was done. He looked to her for permission before he slowly started to push in. Stephanie shut her eyes tightly feeling the pain from being stretched. Carlos lowered himself down and kissed her as he continued to push in. Stephanie let out a yelp when Carlos pushed past something within her. He stayed unmoving for a moment until Stephanie gave him the go ahead. Carlos pulled out and pushed back in slowly moaning as he did so. Stephanie wrapped her legs around Carlos and clawed at his back as she bucked her hips meeting with Carlos' thrusts. "Faster Carlos." Carlos moaned and complied, thrusting his hips faster and harder. Stephanie was screaming and moaning as Carlos continued to pound into her. Her body stiffened and she cried out. "I'm gunna cum!"

"Me too." Stephanie screamed with her release. Her walls convulsed and clamped down around Carlos making him thrust in hard and cum. "Ah Fuuuuck!" Carlos buried his face in Stephanie's shoulder as his hips stuttered with his release. When they came down from their orgasms Carlos pulled out of Stephanie and lay down next to her. After a long moment of silence they both fell asleep.

**A/N: and there you go. When people ask for something… I like to deliver. =]**

…..

**A/N: ok so if you remember the end of chapter two then you would know that Logan comes home and Carlos sees the hickeys thinking something's wrong but Logan says their isn't. Carlos believes him and the chapter ends. Well that wasn't the original. I had written something else but changed it at literally the last minute. I had the document uploaded but edited it before I posted it as the second chapter. The change was significant too. If I hadn't changed it, it probably would have changed the direction of the story somewhat. Anyway when I changed it I saved the original thinking I would use it later but I never did. So… here it is.**

When Kendall walked in looking defeated. He had just finished talking to Jo and to say it didn't go well was an understatement. Kendall was about to let loose his frustrations on James when he noticed James' expression.

"James, what's wrong." James jumped when he heard Kendall's voice. He knew Kendall way to well and if Kendall saw Logan's face he knew that no one would be able to stop the wraith of Kendall Knight.

It's nothing don't worry about it." Kendall saw right through James' act. He walked over to him in order to get an explanation but he noticed a light coming from the bathroom. Kendall furrowed his eyebrows and started walking over, ignoring James who was trying to stop him. When Kendall looked into the bathroom and saw Logan standing in front of the mirror neck and wrists covered in bruises he thought he was going to explode. Something in Kendall just snapped at the thought of anyone doing this to Logan.

"Logan, what happened?" Logan jumped and turned to face Kendall with wide eyes. Kendall's jaw was clenched and Logan could tell that it was taking all Kendall had not to go over to Ryan's apartment and beat the shit out of him.

"Kendall! Calm down its n-not that bad. I just bruise easily." Kendall ignored Logan's explanation and grabbed Logan's chin examining the bruises. He moved his fingers over each one and pulled back Logan's collar a little to see even more bruises. Kendall lifted Logan's arms up and examined the fresh bruises. His jaw tightened even more at the thought that these bruises had been made not too long ago. Kendall grasped the hem of Logan's shirt in order to pull it up but Logan tried pulling away.

"Kendall, no. I'm fine." Kendall looked at Logan for a moment then grabbed his shirt again.

"I'm checking." From the tone in Kendall's voice he knew he couldn't be reasoned with but Logan still wanted Kendall to stop. Every time Logan had been alone with Ryan he had tried to get Logan's shirt off and the feelings of anxiety that always went through him at those moments were hitting Logan now. Logan looked down as he began to shake. Tears fell from his eyes as he placed his hand over the bottom of his shirt in an attempt to stop it from going anywhere.

"I don't want to." Kendall was about to say something when James, who had been watching silently from behind Kendall, stepped between his two friends and pulled Kendall's hand from Logan's shirt.

"Kendall, stop." Kendall stepped back as James glared at him. He and James both knew that they needed to check Logan for more bruises but James wasn't going to let him. James leaned towards Kendall so Logan wouldn't hear him. "We can check later but right now Logan needs you." Kendall glanced around James and spotted Logan who had backed up into the wall still grasping the ends of his shirt. He was shaking and crying making Kendall's heart break. Kendall walked over to Logan slowly trying not to scare him.

"Logan, it's ok. You don't need to take your shirt off if you don't want to. I'm sorry I scared you." Logan let go of his shirt but he was still trying to back himself more into the wall. Kendall stopped walking and opened his arms trying to get Logan to come to him. Logan stared at Kendall for a long moment before he ran forward and threw himself in Kendall's embrace. Kendall wrapped his arms around Logan and rubbed his back as Logan continued to shake and cry. As Kendall continued to hold Logan he glanced over at James with dark eyes. Not wanting to upset Logan anymore he didn't speak but mouthed his thoughts to James.

"That bitch is dead."

**A/N: see that. If I had left it how it was Kendall, James, and Carlos would have found out about Ryan's abuse before he beat up and raped Logan not after. Also in this James was the one who confronted Logan when he came home not Carlos. I changed it to Carlos because I figured he was more gullible and would be less likely to press the matter. So… I wonder what would have happened if I didn't change this. I guess we will never know….**

MORE EXTRA STUFF!

My goal for this story was 20 chapters…. Well I past that didn't I lol.

I had planned on ending it after the trail. And when I wrote that chapter I stopped with when they left but I felt like it was unfinished so I added the divider line thingy and continued the chapter. The line, "There's a golf cart at the Palm Woods that has our name on it." Kendall said with a smirk. Logan smiled and ran towards the door with his three friends behind him." Was going to be the last line of the story but I didn't like the idea of it ending there.

I never intended to bring Logan's dad into the story but every time I wrote something about his mom I would always think, "where is Logan's dad in all this." So I added him. Didn't intend to kill him either but you know that's how I write… I just roll with it. =]

I had fully planned for Logan to be rapped again by Ryan but I felt bad. I think getting raped once is torture enough.

I knew the whole time Ryan was going to get not guilty for the first trial so all the reviews saying he would rot in jail made me laugh evilly hehehe….

I intended to use a security tape as the evidence for the second trial but then I thought, "why didn't they use it in the first trial stupid people!" so I used the answering machine because it was more believable that no one knew it was there.

Oh degrassi… you help my writing so much….

I loved the Kyle XY reference. And I almost made a CSI reference. The forensic scientist was going to be Gil Grissum but I figured one TV show character was good enough.

I didn't originally plan for Ms. Fin to be killed but it made more sense that she would be killed then Mrs. Stewart and I wanted to kill Mrs. Stewart so bad so… I killed them both.

I loved writing this story and I am considering a sequel. Until that time comes (if it does) I have June 10th posted for ur viewing pleasure. =]

**I hope you enjoyed reading this story. I defiantly enjoyed writing it. Unlike always**

**There is no more to come.**


	41. AN

**A/N: hello, hello! Now you're probably wondering "why the hell is there an update for this. This story is done." Well…. You're half right because I am writing a SEQUAL! I hope that makes you happy. **

**I actually wasn't sure if I was going to be able to because I couldn't think of a good idea but when I was in the shower an idea just came to me. I'm like Spencer from icarly "I always get my best ideas when I'm wet." Lol **

**Anyway, as soon as I had the idea I wrote the first chapter so I wouldn't forget. So it is done and I will be putting it up Monday morning so keep an eye out for it. =] **

**The story will be pretty interesting so I hope you like what I have planed. **

**The title of the sequel is Silent Crys for Deliverance.**

**Tell me in a review what you think might happen in the sequel. So far I only have a basic idea so maybe I'll be able to get ideas from you guys. =]**


	42. A and N

**if you haven't seen it the first chapter for the sequel is up so go check it out!**


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